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    A Creative Solution to ‘the Friendship Desert of Modern Adulthood’

    “I knew many old couples who had happy and loving arranged marriages. I thought, <em>If it worked for them, why couldn’t it work for friendships?</em>”
    by Julie Beck Mar 25, 2022 7 minutes
    Source: Wenjia Tang

    Each installment of “The Friendship Files” features a conversation between The Atlantic’s Julie Beck and two or more friends, exploring the history and significance of their relationship.

    This week she talks with three women who are part of a group experimenting with “arranged friendship.” Inspired by the arranged marriages common in her home country of Iran, Ari Honarvar brought together a group of relative strangers who decided to commit upfront to be friends through thick and thin. In this interview, they discuss “the friendship desert of modern adulthood” and the oasis that this experiment created for them.

    The Friends:

    Jessica Harmer, 47, an artist and state-park employee who lives in Oceanside, California
    Ari Honarvar, 49, a writer who lives in San Diego
    Carolyne Ouya, 30, a nonprofit program developer who lives in San Diego

    This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

    Julie Beck: How did you get the idea for approaching friendship this way?

    When I moved to California with my husband and my six-month-old, I really struggled meeting friends. All parents

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