Only Wanna Be Bayou: Magic and Mayhem Universe: Hoodoo and Bayou Series, #5

By Kathy Love

Iris Jourdain is just a witch trying to meet a nice guy. But instead she finds herself in the crosshairs of relentless paranormal stalkers, determined to snatch her away. Or something far worse!

 

Enter Marcel, her grumpy brother-in-law, whose growls and scowls make it crystal clear that he has zero tolerance for witches. Tasked with guarding Iris, he's about as warm and fuzzy as a snowstorm. But as these two unlikely allies spend more time together, Iris begins to wonder if there's more to Marcel than meets the eye. Could he possibly be her very own Prince Charming in disguise.

 

Hold onto your broomsticks and join Iris as she discovers that sometimes a grumpy rougarou might just be the key to finding true magic and love in the most unexpected places.

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kathy Love
• Release date: Oct 30, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223370024

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

Ugh, I swear, Gertie. If I have to go through one more date like that, I’m going to go straight to the Humane Society, adopt ten cats, and spend the rest of my life living with you and my feline friends, I muttered to my familiar perched on my shoulder as I stepped out of the bar nestled on one of the side streets off of Frenchman Street.

Hey, at least this guy wasn’t a slug, Gertie cackled, her corvid voice coming out as if she smoked a pack and a half of unfiltered cigarettes a day. I mean, seriously, who even knew slug Shifters were a thing?

Who would have thought that a starfish Shifter was a thing, I said with the roll of my eyes. I glanced down at my hands, which still felt slightly sticky from my date’s overenthusiastic groping. I think he mollusk-gooped me on the way out. Are starfish mollusks?

 Sounds reasonable to me. And I think he wanted to goop more than just your hand, Gertie said, her words ending with a slight caw of laughter. 

Normally, I would have laughed, too. But tonight, I could quite see the humor in the disastrous date. 

I turned down Frenchmen. Usually, the lights and music and partiers loud voices and raucous laughter would have been enough to push that slimy—literally—an straight out of my thoughts, but tonight, the festive atmosphere didn’t work. 

I wasn’t sure why. I was sort of known for my constantly revolving dating life. And I was a big believer in ‘you win some, you lose some.’ But tonight, was just—well, awful. A handsy starfish was more than I could handle. 

What’s wrong, sugar? Gertie asked, obviously noticing my distracted expression. 

Probably in most cities in the United States conversing with a crow perched on your shoulder would garner more than a few odd looks, but for the residents of New Orleans, it was nothing unusual. 

Okay, a couple people stared—probably tourists. Fortunately, they couldn’t actually hear Gertie talking. Her words just sounded like chirps and caws to non-magical beings. 

So, I was just the eccentric blonde chatting with a bird. 

And I was starting to think that maybe that was all I’d ever be. Was Iris Jourdain admitting that she’d actually like a partner? An honest-to-gosh boyfriend? What was going on with me tonight?

I sighed. I just...I want something more, you know? Something meaningful.

Something that doesn’t involve tentacles? Gertie said.

Definitely no tentacles, I agreed, smiling despite my frustration.

Do starfish have tentacles? The crow cocked her black head as she considered that question. 

That guy definitely did, I stated, shuddering at the idea of him being in a form with more than two arms. He was hard enough to shake off with just the two. 

Maybe you need to go watch a band and dance a little, Gertie suggested. That always makes you feel better.

I shook my head. I think I’ll just head home.

This early? Gertie flapped her wings in surprise. Now I know you are in a funk.

I couldn’t deny it. I was in a funk.

Hey, sugar, don’t you worry. You’ll find that special someone who will make your magic sing. Promise. The bird tweaked a couple of my curls with her beak. Her version of stroking my hair comfortingly. 

I smiled with affection at the bird who was truly my best friend. Gertie probably knew me even better than my sisters did. Which was saying a lot since I was very close to all my family.

I turned down a street in the direction of my home. The sound of music and the revelers slowly faded behind us. 

Gertie preened the feathers of her wings as I still considered the discontent feeling weighing heavy in my chest. Why did I feel so off tonight?

It wasn’t until we were nearly two blocks away from the crowds that another feeling prickled my skin. I slowed my steps, concentrating.

This feeling was not my weird melancholy. This new feeling drove out all my thoughts about finding a real connection with a man. This sensation made me shiver. 

Gertie stopped her preening, bobbing her head around, her beady, black eyes darting around us. She felt it, too. 

Someone was following us. 

Without saying a word, Gertie took flight, and I knew she was flying overhead to scope out the situation.

Could Stan the starfish be following us? He was overly touchy, but he didn’t seem like the type to turn into a full-fledged stalker.  In fact, before I’d even walked out of the small restaurant, Stan had been scanning the place for a new mark to sink his suction cups into. 

No, Stan had a smarmy energy. The energy I was picking up on now was menacing. Dangerous. Scary. 

I hastened my steps, wishing I wasn’t wearing four-inch heels. 

There is someone following you. A big guy. Creepy looking, Gertie called, swooping down to me so she could keep her gravelly voice low. Which made me think that she could tell whoever was following us was magical, and she wanted to be sure that he didn’t hear her talking. I got magical energy, too. 

Is he close? I whispered back, nearly face planting on the uneven sidewalk as my heel caught in a crack. 

Gertie didn’t answer, instead circling around to go check. 

I kept moving as fast as my dumb heels would allow. I contemplated using my magic to change the Jimmy Choo’s into running shoes but didn’t want to waste the time. But I also didn’t want to head straight to my house. The last thing I wanted to do was to lead this guy right back to where I lived. 

I needed a plan. My gut was saying just get home, but I knew it might be wiser to take a more winding route. Hopefully, I could shake him--or at least confuse him. That would also give me time to figure out the best magic to use on him. If I had to.

He’s still following, Gertie announced as she returned, flying beside me. But he seems to be still hanging back.

What does he want? I knew neither of us had that answer, but I still felt the need to say it.

Nothing good, my familiar said realistically.

I knew she was right, and I really did need a plan. I decided to turn off the street I was on. But as soon as I started down the narrow street, I realized I might’ve made a mistake. I wasn’t familiar with this particular road, and the quiet, house-lined street was much more dimly lit than the one I had been on. 

Oh, well, there was no backtracking now, unless I wanted to run right smack into him.

Gertie disappeared again, and I just kept moving down the unfamiliar street.

My shoes tapped on the asphalt as I cut in between two park cars and headed down another, even smaller road.

Where the heck was everyone tonight? Any given night, there would be people out and about, no matter how late. But of course, tonight, the sidewalks were deserted. 

Great. 

He’s moving in faster. Gertie cried, swooping dangerously close to my head in her panic. 

Double great. 

No sooner had she called out to me, than I could hear heavy footsteps behind me. He was definitely getting closer.

I think it might time to bring on the magic, I said, stopping and turning to face this creep head on. 

Gertie landed on the branch of a tree above me. "Sugar, I was sort of wondering what