Lifeline for Parents

By Anna-marie Burger

As a parent wouldn't you want to give your child the best possible chance of success?

Lifeline for Parents is a quintessential guide through a child's developmental stages from birth to secondary school and offers parents practical, tried-and-tested tips. It covers aspects of physical, emotional, psychological and cognitive development as well as discipline, nutrition, sleep and health and safety. This book contains important information relating to school readiness as well as key mathematical and language skills your child has to master.

Anna-Marie Burger is a retired teacher and school principal with 42 years of experience. She has won several Educator of the Year awards and wants to share her vast childhood development knowledge in assisting every parent to develop their children's full potential.

Burger's daughter and co-author Marelda du Preez is also a schoolteacher with years of teaching experience. She has a bachelor's degree in sports science, a post-graduate degree in education and an honours degree in financial planning.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Anna-marie Burger
• Release date: Aug 16, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223915089

Book preview

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Introduction

Development of a child takes place in the first seven years of their life. This development affects who your child will be, how they will act, and whether they will reach their full potential. This development includes social, physical, psychological and cognitive development.

By giving your child the attention they need, teaching them how to interact socially, and by making sure they get enough physical and mental stimulation, you can ensure your child reaches their full potential.

Social development refers to how your child learns to interact and communicate with others while developing their own individuality. It is imperative that you do not force your individuality or who you would like your child to be, on to them. Let them develop their own self while being gently guided by core values and beliefs. Communication is very important, and your child should know around 1 800 words by the time they go to school. Make sure your child is able to express how they feel – for example, by saying, I am hungry or I feel unhappy because… If your child is unable to express themselves, they will throw tantrums as a way of expressing themselves. When a child throws a tantrum do not react. Rather stay on task, do not give in and try to redirect their attention by pointing out something or asking a question.

Most of the time bad behaviour in a child is related to a lack of attention. Try and spend as much uninterrupted time as you can with your child. Positive praise is extremely important because it reinforces good behaviour and helps your child to become confident. When your child seeks attention from you, if they do not get positive attention, they will settle for negative attention which they get through bad behaviour. ADHD (Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder) is often misdiagnosed in children; many parents think their children have ADHD when in fact the parents did not instil their children with the necessary skill sets. You cannot take your child to be diagnosed with ADHD if you as a parent did not do your job and teach your child the necessary skills.

Parents must always set a good example for their children. We know that whatever you show them is what they will do. It is extremely important to be consistent in your actions. If you allow something one day but not the next, you are creating confusion and behavioural problems. Your child should also be able to follow instructions. Start by giving simple instructions like, Wash your hands, then move on to more complex instructions like, Wash your hands then take your plate and sit at the table.

Children should also learn how to share their toys or wait their turn. It is completely normal to buy something for one child only, then the next time buy something for the other child; siblings should not be jealous of each other and should want the best for each other. Parents do not have to buy expensive toys; children will play with anything, which also creates an opportunity for children to be creative. Teach your child the value of money by giving them pocket money and helping them to save for something they want to buy. This in turn will teach them that they must work for what they want.

Cognitive development refers to your child’s mental capacity for things like letters, words, understanding and retelling stories, numbers, patterns, shapes, colours, objects, matching, sorting, problem-solving and cause-and-effect. It is extremely important that you develop a child’s cognitive ability from the time they are born until the age of seven, otherwise they will experience a lifelong struggle with their mental capacity. Please remember that resources should be used as a guide only, and that each child will develop at their own pace. Your job is simply to make sure you provide mental stimulation for your child and not to compare them with other children.

It is extremely important to read to your child on a regular basis, then ask them to retell the story to you. Ask your child to sort simple household items. For instance, sort the clothes for washing according to colour, or sort the Tupperware according to shape. Help your child point out different colours, shapes and patterns while driving around. Help your child develop a love for numbers– buy sweets that are in the shape of numbers and let them identify each number, then let them put the numbers in order. Lastly, let them count from one to ten, and then from one to twenty. Let them point out numbers whenever they see them. Let them help you bake biscuits and show them how to take the measurements. Teach the letters of the alphabet to your child by singing fun songs or playing games.

Physical development refers to how a child’s body grows and changes as well as the skills they develop. Your child will develop their muscles as well as their senses. A parent’s job is to make sure their child gets enough stimulation and affection and to provide proper nutrition to support a healthy body. Make sure your child knows that it is safe to explore and to try new things. If your child falls after trying to walk, do not pick them up, but rather let them try again. This will give them the opportunity to solve a problem. Your child will need to develop their fine- and gross-motor skills as well as balance and movement.

Fine motor skills involve the co-ordination of small muscles with the eyes. For example, you can ask them to hold their arms out straight in front of them and follow an object with their eyes only. You need to observe if their head is also moving as well as their eyes. Gross motor skills involve the movement of larger muscle groups. This includes things like standing, walking, running or kicking a ball. Perception is the ability to see, hear, or become aware of something through our senses; it is the way in which something is regarded, understood, or interpreted. Your child uses their senses to observe; without perception conscious motor movements are excluded.

Psychological development refers to how children develop a self-concept, the values, abilities, attitudes and attributes that define them. Let your child define themselves. So often adults struggle to find their true selves because they were not able to do so from a young age or were led in a different direction by their parents. Let your child do as much as possible on their own to help them gain confidence. Let your child make their own choices and learn from their mistakes (unless the situation will cause physical harm to your child). Understandably, this is often very difficult to do