Awakening Faith: A Guide for Loving Those Who Leave the Church

By Kevin R. Scott

Evangelical Christians all over the United States are wrestling with the reality of loved ones—children, spouses, friends, fellow church members—who are actively deconstructing their faith. Filled with fear and concern for their loved ones, these faithful Christians too often respond in panicked ways that cause pain to their loved one and drive a wedge into their relationship with them.

 

What if there were a way for evangelical Christians to maintain a healthy relationship with their deconstructing loved ones, while at the same time being true to their own faith? Author Kevin Scott believes this is what most Christians truly want, and his new book, Awakening Faith, shows them the way. The key is found in verses that exhort us to "take captive every thought" (2 Cor. 10:5) and "think on these things" (Phil. 4:8).

 

Awakening Faith offers a biblical way to think about a loved one's deconstruction that sees God's hand on their spiritual journey every step of the way. It offers 12 biblical affirmations of faith, hope, and love. These affirmations reveal that God may be doing more in their loved one's life than the reader is currently able to discern. By embracing these 12 biblical affirmations, the reader will awaken their faith to trust God for their loved one's spiritual journey, even when they don't fully understand where it's heading.

 

This compassionate, practical guide will strengthen readers' faith and help them have a positive, meaningful, long-lasting relationship with their deconstructing loved one. 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kevin R. Scott
• Release date: Jun 27, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223261865

Book preview

Copyright Notice

Awakening Faith:

A Guide for Loving Those Who Leave the Church

© 2023 by Kevin R. Scott

Scriptures, unless otherwise indicated, are from The Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®, Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other—except for brief quotations in published reviews, without the prior written permission of the author.

E-books are not transferable. They cannot be sold, shared, or given away without copyright infringement of this work. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of the e-book on the screen.

Cover design: Lauren Scott

The accounts, descriptions, and opinions expressed in this book are based solely on the author’s experience, perspective, research, and understanding. They are not intended to replace professional consultation, advice, or therapy when such is warranted. Every situation is unique; no guarantees or warranties are implied regarding the results of applying the book’s contents to your unique circumstances.

Dedication

To those with the courage to think for themselves

and embark on their own spiritual journey,

and to all those who love them.

May you experience unexpected growth,

greater spiritual awareness and maturity,

and all the love and support you need.

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Start Here

I have titled this part of the book as I have, because for many readers, the word introduction translates roughly as, You can safely skip this material. But the next few pages contain crucial information for getting the most from this book. Even if you are typically an introduction-skipper, I strongly encourage you to start here.

My assumption is that you are reading this book because you are concerned about a loved one—a friend, child, spouse, significant other, or even a parent—and where their spiritual journey seems to be taking them. They’re actively questioning, doubting, and criticizing people, institutions, and ideas you hold dear. They’re espousing political views that seem contrary to faith. Maybe they’re exploring other faiths—or no faith! You want to maintain a good relationship, but you also want your loved one to know how you feel. Above all, you want them to maintain a healthy relationship with Christ—but you suspect they’re not really interested in your opinions. When you try to address their changing beliefs, they shut you down.

You may wonder, How can I have a healthy relationship with my loved one while remaining true to my faith? That’s where this book comes in. By reading and applying the guidance in this book, you will learn and internalize the best ways to think about and relate with your loved one for as long as they continue their spiritual journey. In the process, the book will invite you not only to remain true to your faith but to awaken your faith to an even higher level than you have previously experienced.

Acknowledging Your Pain

Let’s take a moment, right here at the outset, to acknowledge together how painful it can be when a loved one embarks on a spiritual journey to places where you can’t or won’t follow. While one of my intentions for this book is to help you rise above those negative emotions to relate to your loved one in a meaningful, loving way, we must begin where we are. And I’m guessing that your loved one’s recent attitudes about the Christian faith have you feeling some kind of way.

Your loved one’s spiritual journey is likely to elicit several difficult emotions in you—surprise, confusion, sadness, fear, anger, disgust, and more. The feelings you experience during this time are personal and unique to you, and you are not wrong for feeling whatever you feel. The sooner you can identify, accept, and release those feelings—rather than trying to ignore, resist, or deny their existence—the better off you and your loved one will be.

Feelings Influence Actions

It’s never a good idea to ignore or deny what you’re feeling. Instead, it’s important to acknowledge your feelings and try to understand what they are telling you. In this case, your emotions are likely telling you that you believe your loved one is making a big mistake. Maybe they are; maybe they aren’t—that’s between them and the Creator. What’s important for you right now is to recognize how you are feeling about your loved one and their spiritual journey. That’s because your feelings influence your actions.

You’ve probably noticed this phenomenon before. When you get a good night’s sleep, and your day starts off on a positive note, you’re more likely to be friendly to the people around you and have conversations that feel encouraging and productive. Maybe you woke up in time to make coffee, have your quiet time, and even have a bite to eat before attacking the day’s task list. A good start to the day can generate positive feelings that have a powerful impact throughout the day.

But some mornings, everything seems to go wrong. Your alarm doesn’t go off, so you’re not able to follow through on your normal morning routine. When you stumble out of bed, you stub your toe, and the physical pain causes you to react in frustration and anger. You’re having negative feelings right out of the gate, and unless you put in the effort to turn your day around, those negative feelings can impact the way you interact with people throughout your day.

More than you realize, the way you feel about your loved one dictates how you interact with them. If you feel mostly negative, you will unintentionally have interactions with your loved one that will undermine your relationship with them. You might find yourself lashing out in anger and hurt, punishing them with silence, or even trying to manipulate them back into the fold so you can feel good about them again.

Such negative feelings, left