Voices, Bumps, Thumps, and Jumps

By Patricia Tidmore

There are many questions in life that seem to go unanswered. Are you hurting after you have gotten saved? Are you wondering why your life has not changed? Are you watching the world zoom by without you? Perhaps you see others live a glorious life; they are not saved, but you are saved and serve Christ with all you got, but nothing never seems to bless you. You ask why your world feels like it is ending instead of beginning? Have pastors or other leaders told you that your life was going to turn around after you got saved, but you are not seeing instant results? Maybe someone prophesied that you were going to come out of financial difficulties, but you are deeper in or that your marriage was going to get better and it ended up in divorce. All the promises you have heard became empty and futile. Are you waiting for a husband or wife from God for years and still nothing? Are you having trouble with your family or children? All the questions that you ask and seek why your life has not changed. Patricia Tidmore does not have all the answers, but the Holy Spirit has revealed many of the answers.

Although every family or individual is different, God has a unique purpose for everyone. He is, right now, constructing you and molding you into a special person to be a blessing for many others. If you are willing, He can change your world into a phenomenal world. Question after question will be answered to its fullest if you are willing to stay in the fight. The devil would have you believe that God has left you and that He is a liar, but it is the devil who is the liar. God is truth, and He has an interesting way of teaching you. Patricia prays that you will hear the voice of God clearly so that you can be lead into your sole purpose in freedom. To lead you in your unique purpose. To bless you with liberty. If your life as a Christian has been chaotic, it is time for it to stop. May you be delivered and healed from voices that are not from God, from disease and sickness, from evil and wickedness, from poverty, stress, sexual perversion, and many more demonic oppression. God wants to set you free and that time is now!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Apr 21, 2023
• ISBN: 9781640285316

Book preview

Table of Contents

Title

Copyright

Born Again

Oakley Street

Step Forward

True Deliverance

Vacation in Chi Town

Demons on Board

Your Deliverance and Freedom for Good

From Death to Life

About the Author

Voices, Bumps, Thumps, and Jumps

Patricia Tidmore

ISBN 978-1-64028-530-9 (Paperback)

ISBN 979-8-88943-039-1 (Hardcover)

ISBN 978-1-64028-531-6 (Digital)

Copyright © 2023 by Patricia Tidmore

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing

296 Chestnut Street

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Dedication

Idedicate this book to my Lord Jesus Christ, my Savior. He has walked me through some mighty tough times, and He still moves me so sweetly. I also want to thank the wonderful people I have met along the way who blessed me with their prayers, time, and money. Those people were true friends to me and loved me through the trials my children and I have endured. I also want to dedicate this book to my children and grandchildren that I love with all my heart. A few people come to mind right now is Robin Drummond, Cynthia Saffo, Mag Hall, John Saldana, Renee Tidmore, my awesome cousin that supported me in helping me get my first book out to many people and Mom Bessie. We have been through many hard times, but together through prayer and love for each other, has been a great journey. Thank you for supporting me as I follow Jesus.

Introduction

This book follows my I Serve You Notice novel. After a life of sin that I carried for many years, I was saved. This novel speaks of what I went through after I was saved. Many people feel that it is going to be peaches and cream after they get saved, but I am here to teach you that many storms and battles will follow afterward. Serving the Christian realm is not easy while trying to stay close to Jesus. We serve a mighty God and He loves us, but there is a devil who hates us as much as God loves us. That is a lot of hate. Satan sends his imps, foes, cohorts, or whatever else you want to call them out to study us during our lifetime so that he can do what was promised to us, which is to steal, kill, and destroy us (Jn. 10:10). The greatest promise that follows is that Jesus came to give us life and have it abundantly. He wants us to have a good life right here on earth, but that is hard for many to believe. I am the first to admit that it is a hard life out there all over the world. If you take the time out to look around, you will see that there are people who are going through even harder times than you. My life was a horrendous life, and there were times I truly thought I would not make it out alive and there were often times I wanted to die. I got mad at God and would yell and scream at Him sometimes. I was broken terribly, and I became an accuser, yet God did not leave me or forget about me. He gently guided me after my temper tantrums were through. People leave people, and they interpret what is going on with the other person, not knowing exactly what is going on with them. I have been left by loved ones, used by people, hurt by the Church members and pastors. There were so much rejection and abandonment in my life that I thought when I got saved, it would all go away. I am here to prove you today that demons are real and will try to disrupt your life, but I am going to teach you how you can be delivered and healed in Jesus's name so that you can live a free life totally. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever and nothing has changed since He set His Holy Bible into all the world. There are too many people still living in bondage and are wondering how to overcome. There are many questions that many of you have for the Lord and life is passing you by in the same state you were in years ago. Today is time for change if you want it bad enough. Do you dare to believe?

Born Again

Wow! Me being born again was strange to me. Here I was standing and waiting on a big boom or something to show me that I was saved. I didn't have a feeling like I was being lifted off the ground or anything, or a visitation from Jesus, did not show up. Right from the beginning, I wanted Him to show up and tell me what to do. I knew in my heart that I wanted to serve Him with all my heart, but knowing me, I knew I could mess the whole thing up. I fell head over heels in love with the Lord the minute I said I do . I instantly wanted more of Him. After that great day of standing before the church as they witnessed that I was serious about the Lord, I was ready to do my duty as a Christian. I had gotten my income tax check, and I headed for the Christian bookstore. I bought Christian Study Bibles for me and my children and got ready for the journey ahead. The very day I bought those Bibles and tithed off the four thousand dollars I had gotten, I paid my rent and then groceries and clothes for my children. I had overlooked an electric bill, and I had no more money left. They had threatened to cut my electric off. I drove to the welfare, and I asked for some help. Being that I was a Christian now, I told them the truth and nothing but the truth. I let them know that I had tithed after my car payment, rent, other bills, groceries, and clothing for my children. I did not realize that Social Services was not going to look at things the way that I have seen things. I was so happy I was saved that I was jumping off ceilings and ready to tell the world that Patricia was saved! Nobody seemed to have shared my blessings. While I was jumping for joy and wanting everyone to share my feelings, they looked at me like there was something wrong with me. They turned me down for the help of my electric bill. Right away, I felt rejected and that God had abandoned me. I went in the parking lot, and I cried out to God and asked why, after giving my tithes, did He leave me out there. I laid on the steering wheel and cried my hardest. Looking back, what a big baby I was. My feelings got hurt about everything. As my son says all the time, Get out of your feelings. I was definitely in my feelings. I drove home and went in the house, and I called the electric company.

I asked to speak to a manager, and they connected me to a lady that understood my request. She told me that they could do nothing about it and that my bill was too high to make an arrangement. I believe the bill was around four hundred dollars. I accepted what she had told me, and I went to bed expecting that my electric would be turned off the next day. I went on to read my Bible and try to stay close to God. No more crying, just stay true to the Lord is what my final decision was. That evening, my phone rang and I didn't answer. They left a message and I immediately picked up my land phone to listen to the message that was left to me. As I listened and waited on bad news, my mouth flung open in surprise! The message was the same manager from the electric company that said, Patricia, looking over your bill, we have found a mistake and you owe the electric company nothing. You from this day have a zero balance.

I was about to just faint. My first miracle! Wow, I thought. God is real! Now I had no worries about my lights getting cut off. I always made sure that my children would have all the time. I never was a complainer about things in life, but serving my children was all that was set in my mind. I had vowed when the fathers of my children were not going to be there, I was going to be their father and mother. I understood in the world that raising my children was all on me and that I had to own up to taking care of them 100 percent. Tanisha's father always claimed that he was going to be there for me and Tanisha but lied. The other three children, their father made the same claim, but he backed out on every promise. I was not going to hurt my children that way. I made a promise to myself. So now I got my first miracle from God and He did not have to do it. He did not have to prove to me that He was God, my Father, but He did. Numbers 23:19 says, God is not a man, so He does not lie. He is not human, so He does not change His mind. Has He ever promised and not carried it through? There will never be a time that God will speak something to us and then never come through. I was learning this new truth from my Father and not from what a human would tell me. I was falling in love for the first time in my life with a real man. I couldn't understand this kind of love, and it was overwhelming. God instantly started speaking to me very plain and clear. He told me to call my children's fathers and tell them that I have forgiven them. That was so hard for me to do.

I argued with the Lord for a few minutes before I realized that He was not arguing back. He said nothing. I pouted and made some little girl faces, trying to have my way, but no response. He wanted me to call them and apologize. I did as he asked, and it was the hardest thing ever. I wanted them to sweat and feel the pain that I was feeling. I got through it and felt no better. I felt like they were getting away with everything. You know how siblings fight and argue then tell Dad or Mom what was going on, and it seemed as though they were taking up for the brother or sister? Well, that's what I felt. I didn't understand why I was struggling, and they were living well after what they had done to me. God never explained or tried to console me. I felt abandoned. Although I felt that way, I understood that He was my Daddy and He knew what was best for me. Because I did not understand, I continued on doing things my own way. I let Him have only pieces of me. I called myself giving Him the whole me, but . . . no, I gave Him what I wanted Him to have. I gave Him my heart, my health, and my children, but not my finances, or my household. I had to be in charge of something. So God worked on only the stuff I allowed Him to have. He started to heal me right away. He miraculously healed me of anxiety attacks and heart palpitations. I used to have palpitations so bad that my children were calling 911 every day because we all thought I was having a heart attack. My children bowed to the Word and God with no problem. They followed Mom everywhere she went. I loved God, and I gave Him my heart fully. I would ask Him every day to receive my love for Him. I told Him that I wanted to love Him more today than yesterday, love Him more tomorrow than today, and love Him more in twenty years from now more than tomorrow. I wanted Him to love me like that, but I didn't receive it. How can anyone love me like that? This Big God and He loves me? There was no way I could let that permeate in me. I pressed on anyway by reading my Bible. I decided to read the whole Bible through. I also started reading the books my sister gave me. One was called The Bondage Breaker. I was caught up in that book as I lined it up with the Bible.

Satan attacks from the very beginning. I was in my bed one night while my children were sleeping. I opened up my Bible and the book opened to a chapter that spoke on who I am. I was learning who I was and what God says about me.

I was amazed about what my Father, your Father had in mind about me. He had it all written out about who I am. All of a sudden, I felt a presence come into my room. The presence was overbearing, and I couldn't take the feel of the room. I heard God gently say, Do not be afraid and do not move. Keep reading but out loud. I started to read the list of I Am's. The more the presence came closer, I could tell that it was Satan himself. He came to get his queen back. I was so frightened that I couldn't move. I got louder and louder reading until the presence left. God had shown me that satan could not harm me in any way and that He was right there beside me. I was truly free. Each day got harder. I had taken all my children to church one Sunday, and when we got back home we decided to get a movie from Blockbuster. We searched and searched for a movie and then finally decided on a new movie that came out called The Ring. It was a horror movie and I felt in my spirit not to buy that movie, but I did anyway against the voice that told me not too. We watched that movie all the way through, and it terrified us all. There was nothing different from the rest of the horror movies, and this one seemed weaker than the rest, yet something was strange and horrifying. When we went to bed that night, I tossed and turned and felt a presence in the whole house. The doorbell rang with no one there and boxes were moving around in my living room. Before this, I used to see things and hear walking around in our homes all the time. I used to sit in the basement of this Asheboro house that I turned into an apartment for my eldest daughter Tanisha and would hear walking around upstairs and cooking going on. I would smell bacon like somebody was cooking breakfast. In my son's closet leading to an attic, we found old army and family pictures. I knew that there was a presence in that attic. I never would go up there. What I didn't understand was that every home we ever lived in was the same way. I felt a presence with us, and there were many that lived with us. I couldn't contemplate how many spiritual beings, which we called ghost, were with us, but my children always spoke on different people they had seen. I used to have dreams of Beverly, NJ when I was young. I would walk by the old house my mother died in, and she would be on the porch wanting me to turn and look at her as I was walking by. The dream was so real.

I knew in the dream that my mother was sitting on the porch. I pictured her pale with long, white hair. My heart would pound, and I was afraid to pass by the house. I knew that she wanted me for something, but I would not turn and look at her. I had this dream so many times, and I walked in fear constantly. I knew that dreams meant something, and I could not figure this one out, but that she was trying to visit me. After she had died, I had said one day out loud, I hope my mother never tries to visit me. That was my most fear in the world. My second fear was failure of raising my children right. There is a scripture in the Bible in Job 3:25 that says, For the thing which I greatly feared has come upon me, and that which I was afraid of has come unto me. Job was so afraid that something would happen to his children because of their sins that he would repent for them daily. All his children were partying one day at the oldest brother's house when Job got the message that all his children had died. He lost everything he owned at that time. Those fears fed the devil just what he needed to harm him. It is just like having an enemy and you tell him your worst fear. That enemy will use that fear to bring harm on you and even your family or loved ones. I also know he will try to kill your pets because of the love you have for them. I knew definitely that watching this movie either woke up some spiritual stuff in the house or something came through the television.

I got up and returned the movie right away. I was determined to stay in my right mind and to walk this thing out without fear. I had not learned about the scripture about not fearing anything, I just was a bold chick and realized I had to go all the way in this. I knew that there were things going on in the spirit all my life because of the many encounters I had had in my daily growth. My last book, I Serve You Notice, I mentioned when I was a little girl living in Douglasville, PA, that I had seen an angel and a demon on the same night. The angel came and gave me warning but was there as my protector because of what lied before me. The demon came to give me great fear and darkness. I never forget that eerie night that frightened me to no end. That night seemed to have lasted forever.

I got up every Sunday early to make sure the children were getting ready for church. I wanted this badly, and I wanted my children to experience a new Me. I wanted to be a new me. My life had to change, and I wanted it right then and there. That was one of my problems from the start. Everything was I. I was so controlling that I spoke about what I wanted to do and that was the way it was going to turn out. See, when you really turn your life over to Christ Jesus, you will start to notice things about yourself that you will want to turn over to the Lord. Then all these other things start to come about like . . . shame, embarrassment, and shyness. That shyness is the kicker.

We want to hide from the Lord all the things that are in our memory when we acted like fools out there in the world. I hid from God just like Adam and Eve. I knew He saw me for all the things that I have done, but guess what? He didn't yell at me or frown at me as to say, You are a stinky girl and I have no place for you in heaven. No, He did not say any of those things to me. Sometimes He said nothing. I beat myself up so much that He didn't need to say a word. I mean, why should God say anything to me, by the time I was through with me, I was drained and crying myself to sleep. Tanisha, Jose, Zyra, and Kyleeka never complained about going to church; they were happy children and went where I went.

Tanisha had some problems with depression, but she never gave me a bit of troubles. Church at New Jerusalem was fun to me. The music and dancing in church was a blessing. It showed me that dancing in the clubs and dancing for the Lord were absolutely two different things. I loved the way we would worship and gave the Lord our expression of love for Him. I could feel the Lord's presence as we praised and worshipped Him. He loved us, and it seemed as though the church loved Him back. One thing I learned there first was that when we tell God that we will live for Him and only Him, a lot of storms come behind that profession. We were challenged by the devil all the time, and it was getting harder and harder for that church to stand. When the tough times came, we had to show how much we would stand for each other as brothers and sisters in Christ. My first challenge was I lost my job and I had to learn how to trust God that He would provide for me and my children. I was so willing to give everything I had to the Lord because of the healing He had done in my body of alcohol. He proved Himself to me and He didn't have too. I started to grow superfast and Black did too. He stuck close to my side, and we were growing together. His friendship was good, but he wanted to be my husband.

Marriage was too much for me at that time because I needed to know who I was and who I was to Jesus. I had so many confusions in me, and I knew marriage was a no-no. Black kept insisting that we be together as husband and wife, but truth was that he was hardheaded and very unattractive. I was no prize myself on the inside. My outside, I thought was quite cute. I would always dress up and put makeup on and go out just to show off my beauty. My daughter Tanisha told me later some years down the line that I wore my clothes too tight and I embarrassed her. I thought I was very stylish. Appearance meant everything to me. I was a woman and I enjoyed being a woman, but I also had wished I was a man. I didn't want to be a lesbian, I just was attractive to the power and strength that a man had. I valued the authority that a man had. I wanted that. I felt like men had deserted that power that they had been blessed. I watched men ride on bicycles all day looking for drugs. Black men were the worst. They would ride around with their heads down and search for drugs all around the neighborhood. Asheboro had no rich people living there, just poor and middle-class people. I was considered a middle-class person. I was making forty thousand a year and that was great in the eyes of the people there. I made more than police officers. There were many prejudiced people there also. But my eyes were always closed to racism. I honestly lived with my eyes closed to color. I always understood that we all look alike, just different colors. I faced police that hated that I was a single mom driving a nice car and running a restaurant. Jealousy was all around me, and I faced many challenges because of it. My children dressed nice, and I would pick other parents' children up to play with my children. I tried to be that all-around mom that you see on TV. I would keep good meals on the table, tuck my children in bed at night, and try to sing them to sleep. I had a dream of being the storybook mom. I allowed my children to have pets, like cats, dogs, hamsters, fish, turtles, rabbits, and a few other animals, but I did not allow snakes in my house. I was too scared of them. I wanted the family that I thought every family had. The storybooks told me all about a mother and a father in the home and their children. I read about Jack and Jill, Penny and Pam, the dog Spot, and other seem to be happy children. I wanted that life for my children.

We, as parents, never really think about them growing up. We live day to day, year after year, birthday after birthday come and go, yet we still don't picture that day that they would be all grown up until one day you look up and that day has arrived. They are grown and talking back with opinions of their own. My house was a three-bedroom brick house with one huge bathroom and a large basement. It had an average backyard that led into the woods. My house was standing on a hill with a nice porch on it. There were no other houses there, just apartments that were built around it. Everyone we knew was envious of us living on that hill. My children loved it. The rent was $450 a month. It was cheap because new construction was being built around it. My children had a time of their life there. On snow days, they would go out and make sleighs so that they could slide down the big hill that was in front of our house. I could walk to work if I wanted to and the schools were really close by. In the area we lived in, there were no black people. The black people lived on the other side of Asheboro, and most of them lived in the projects. I hated to live in poverty, and I stayed far as I could from it. It didn't matter what I had to do to stay out of it. My mother was poor, my grandmother was poor, and everyone I knew growing up was poor. Poverty is dark and that