The Sanity Game: Cut the Insanity That Drives Employees Crazy

By Chris Moses

Looking at the back of a book to figure out how to stop the pain and suffering created by insanity is insane!

Start on page 1, invest a few hours, and win the sanity game. This book will provide you with actionable material that will improve your environment for team growth, personal growth, and strategies for getting your sanity back.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Newman Springs Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Mar 7, 2023
• ISBN: 9781684981861

Book preview

Table of Contents

Title

Copyright

Foreword

Introduction

Chapter 1: Insanity and Inhumanity, That's What's for Breakfast

Chapter 2: Reaching Up to Touch Rock Bottom

Chapter 3: Yes, It Can Get Worse!

Chapter 4: Crazy Is Like a Wart That Won't Go Away

Chapter 5: Nuclear Bombs and Copilots

Chapter 6: Anger Management

Chapter 7: Stealing from Your Future Success

Chapter 8: Bankruptcy Loves Insanity, Prosperity Partners with Sanity

Finesse

Being Insane Is Complicated, Sanity Isn't

Chapter 10: Hiring and Stabbing, Two Critical Skills

Chapter 11: Bad News Is for Champions

Chapter 12: A Healthy Road

Chapter 13: Permission Granted

Fun

Chapter 14: Improving Health One Fun Day at a Time

Chapter 15: Go beyond a Boring Company Picnic

Chapter 16: Expect the Best and Provide the Best

Chapter 17: Lighten Up, Live Sanely

Conclusion: Now You Know

Acknowledgments

About the Author

cover.jpg

The Sanity Game

Cut the Insanity That Drives Employees Crazy

Chris Moses

Copyright © 2023 Chris Moses

All rights reserved

First Edition

NEWMAN SPRINGS PUBLISHING

320 Broad Street

Red Bank, NJ 07701

First originally published by Newman Springs Publishing 2023

ISBN 978-1-68498-184-7 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-1-68498-185-4 (Hardcover)

ISBN 978-1-68498-186-1 (Digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Without insanity, I would have never known what sanity looks like. Thank you to all the insane people and experiences that made this book possible. More importantly, thank you to my mother for the years of honest guidance. A day does not go by that I do not reflect on our conversations.

Foreword

I bet you know what drives you crazy. You could quickly list several things about where you work or live that make you nuts. You notice and roll your eyes at silly behavior around you at work and in the world at large.

But do you know what you are doing that seems insane to your employees? If you eavesdropped on a conversation at the local hangout after work, what would they say about the things you do that drive them nuts?

Crazy and counterproductive behavior is easier to identify in others than it is in ourselves.

It isn't hard to spot in the workplace.

This book is a mirror to help you see yourself more clearly and a recipe for how to stop driving your employees crazy and become a more effective leader. It will help you identify what you and your organization need to start doing to create a more productive workplace.

Why do seemingly sane leaders and companies do insane things? Why are many stuck in the '80s using strategies that were marginally effective then and completely ineffective now? Maybe this is caused by habit, distraction, a lack of training, or a sense of desperation. In any case, the result is the same; it drives employees crazy.

A good leader has realistic and high expectations of those he or she leads. Success is achieved not only by giving employees what they need but by removing the things that drive them nuts. This book identifies just what those behaviors are and how to correct them.

I've known Chris for several years. He is deeply experienced and a true learner. He pays attention to what organizations are doing, right and wrong, and how to fully engage talent.

One of the things I like about Chris is he's a pragmatist; he's to the point and often blunt. He doesn't waste your time sugarcoating things. As a result, he makes best use of your time with his insights and suggestions.

He and I share a commitment to helping leaders and organizations not just become better but to achieve more of their potential and become more of what they can be. I do it through speaking and advising leaders. Chris and his team do that through training, consulting, and providing fractional HR solutions with his company, HR Sanity.

If you're fed up, or your employees are fed up, then cut the insanity. Read this book and do what is necessary to make your workplace both sane and productive.

Enjoy.

Mark Sanborn

President, Sanborn and Associates

Introduction

Let's be honest. The world has become insane: screaming bosses, lying employees, unfair review standards, hiring the wrong people, cultlike employer language, and crazy bonus and reward systems.

Every time you step into your office, it's like entering into a dysfunctional relationship.

Businesses become insane for a myriad of reasons: political correctness that leads to dishonesty, people afraid they might be perceived as bullies if they tell the truth, employees terrified to admit a mistake, too boring environments, and cultures that make you want to gouge your eyes out before lunch.

Do you work in a culture where you're ready to toss your hands up in frustration? Are you the boss people run and hide from? Do you wonder why employees don't see your vision? Whether you're an entry-level employee, manager, director, VP, or a C-level executive, buckle your seat belt. Join me on a quest to win the sanity game by transforming the working world from insane to sane and changing the inhumane to humane.

Are You an Insane Business Leader?

If you are, or even if you're afraid you might be, I'm going to call you out and share what it takes to turn it around so your employees give their best. If you don't consider yourself an insane business leader, then think of this as a preemptive strike, so you can be sure you never head down that dark road. And if you're really not sure, all you need to know is that the more you know about yourself and your leadership style, the better you can lead.

Many business leaders unwittingly inflict insane behaviors and policies on their lives and the lives of the people who depend on them. They think they're doing it right, but they're not.

Many people believe sanity is impossible. They don't play the game and rely on old bromides like Our employees are our best asset. That's like saying liquid is the best thirst quencher. Are insane employees an asset or a liability? Maybe they're an asset but only if you study what to do.

In these pages, I'll point out some common insane antics, and we'll consider how to fix them. I'll also share why you shouldn't lead with insane behavior.

People blind to insanity at work probably live with the same kind of insanity at home. They walk in the door and yell at their kids and spouse. They think acting like a jerk will make people do their bidding. People might respond in the short run, but eventually, this behavior adds to a long list of problems.

Over the last two decades since I began working in human resources, I've noticed working relationships have grown unhealthier, damaging the success of organizations. I decided to call it out and put an end to the insanity. Yes, there are sick puppies who enjoy living in a dysfunctional world, but the people who work for them don't appreciate it.

Sane employees make your business better—not just by working well but also by assisting others, creating a positive, sane environment, inspiring people, growing people, and helping others out.

You'll also find plenty of insane people everyone avoids like the plague. People walk around wondering why those stressful weirdos haven't been fired yet. They don't know there's a game. They bring down the whole environment and everyone in it. They're easy to pinpoint, while the sane ones go unnoticed.

Silence Is an Endorsement of Insanity

As you read The Sanity Game, you'll discover that remaining silent only endorses bad behavior. Ignoring insanity without consequences—either positive or negative—results in letting it drag on, until

your best people leave for greener pastures.

mediocre people cover up and hide.

substandard people create rumors and gossip and run roughshod over others.

Finally, your group becomes known as a problem child or the one that can't be relied upon.

I wrote The Sanity Game because I'm dedicated to helping you and the people who work with you enjoy a better professional life. Implementing these strategies and tactics results in working fewer hours because you've changed your behavior and the culture around you. The people you lead operate as a real team. As the only chief sanity officer in America, I'm excited to share my experience and help you transform where you work.

The concept of creating sanity and eliminating insanity first resonated with me more than a decade ago as a human resources director. I saw all levels of the organization and paid close attention to people's behaviors. Before I took on that role and thought carefully about what I was seeing, I'd simply figured that what I observed was normal and acceptable conduct in business.

I saw the backstabbing, the storytelling, people disrespecting others in meetings, and all the negative, scheming behaviors that didn't appear to help anyone—least of all the organization as a whole. I thought, Well, maybe it makes them feel better. But I discovered that wasn't true either. I realized no one felt better, this kind of behavior hurt everyone, and I finally decided, This is wrong on so many levels.

As my career grew, I witnessed the same shenanigans throughout larger organizations. People would come and whisper, Hey, do you know about…?

I thought, No, I don't. But why should I care?

Knowing the latest gossip doesn't add value. It only makes you a compelling storyteller. It makes the other person look worse than the storyteller, and it makes the storyteller feel better about him or herself. These kinds of storytellers like making others look bad.

Ten minutes after a combative meeting, employees who were the target of the boss's anger that day would tell everyone how they were yelled at and screwed over.

I thought, Wow, the boss was attempting to motivate the team, but it had the opposite effect. People froze and stopped adding value. When people freeze, they do nothing. The result? You lose sales, time, future revenue, and value. Sadly, many leaders think insanity is a successful business tactic. However, it rarely works.

Office politics can be positive or negative. Negative office politics fall in the category of people acting like bullies. I've seen it countless times. Leaders should be approachable and add value.

Build Personal Relationships of Trust

Developing a sane environment takes building a personal and emotional relationship with your team. That requires connecting with people you work with, sell to, or otherwise interact with. If you don't connect and trust each other, they won't work hard for you, buy more products, deal with you, or help you out.

This book is organized into three major parts which lead to a sane, humane culture. These three parts include facts, finesse, and fun. Here's a brief rundown of all three and how they'll help improve your organization, making it a place where everyone enjoys coming to work and everyone adds value.

Facts

When you lead with facts and deal with what's happening, there's little emotion attached. Facts are facts, with no happy or sad. Facts let you discuss where you are and where you want to be, so you can foster sanity.

Facts are inherently objective. However, when a leader disrespects people, the value of employees plummets. They'll leave a meeting disheartened, frozen by fear, and unable to add value. If you're being disrespectful, don't get emotional about being called out. Disrespectful leaders rarely build teams that add value. Or if you won't correct problems because you're afraid, you endorse bad behavior.

You might think you're sharing with passion by yelling, but it's a lie. Yelling as a method of delivering information is insane.

People subjected to insanity and inhumanity at work go through a downward emotional spiral from I'm listening to Oh, my God, I can't believe he's berating me. Or they experience emotions of fight or flight as they freeze and think, How the hell do I get out of here?

Doctors are paid to be honest and tell you the truth. They'll say, You're overweight and you have high blood pressure. Here are the numbers. They give you precise information and facts, without emotion. Stop eating a pound of bacon each day, and your blood pressure will drop. How would you feel if you went to a doctor and were told, You're kind of healthy, so see you next year? You'd never go back because you received no value from that interaction. When a doctor doesn't tell you what's wrong, you find another doctor. You can't succeed by avoiding the truth and being insane.

Finesse

Finesse gives you an array of options you can implement in working together with your team. You can make things better while tactfully changing how you work. Then the people you lead start to change. In this part of The Sanity Game, you'll read about being honest and respectful. It's a basic concept, yet it can feel foreign to many leaders.

Do you ever think, I can't be honest; it would hurt their feelings?

Eventually, you'll hurt their careers if you're dishonest.

Since the early days of my career in the 1990s, society has shifted. People want to protect each other, hug each other, and give everyone a trophy. Many run their businesses afraid of upsetting people. I've known leaders who tell employees they want to fire that they're rock stars. The employee feels great, but the team suffers.

When people have problems, they need the truth. In this part of The Sanity Game, you'll learn to deliver the truth without sugarcoating and while still being respectful and creating the positive change you want. If people must read through your sugarcoating, they can't improve and give their best.

Fun

Many executives balk at the idea, arguing, "Fun? They're supposed to be working."

Work can become fun when you're treated honestly, people help each other, and the backstabbers and gossips are unwelcome. In an environment where the team goes out together, helps each other, enjoys parties and other activities, you have fun while creating a dynamic team. That makes work more fun. If we go to dinner, go for a walking meeting, get popsicles, and do goofy things together in a sane culture, work becomes fun.

People tell me I can be a mean boss because I'm direct and honest. But I'm also a fun boss. I use facts, finesse, and fun. I also practice sanity and humanity. Being direct means telling the truth about good things and where there are opportunities for growth. You'll learn to give honest praise and feedback, which will ignite your employees and encourage them to do their best.

When you say I've had enough insanity and inhumanity. I'm doing it differently, using facts, finesse, and fun, things shift. What happens? You get noticed. People will detect a difference. They might run scared at first, but then they'll flock to you. They'll appreciate your honesty, respectfulness, sense of calm, and sense of fun. Then they'll follow you forever.

Fostering a relationship of trust, openness, and transparency is essential to knowing who's sane and who's insane. Being an open, honest leader who sets a positive example also helps build a sane environment.

Restaurant chain Chick-fil-A has a customer service bible about how they treat each other and customers. As a result, people flock there in droves. They're one of the most profitable fast-food joints, and they're only open six days a week selling chicken sandwiches. In the western states, In-N-Out Burger is another great example of a business run