My Prince

By Fitzroy (Smitty) Smith

My handsome, precious, well-mannered son, Kalan Timothy Joshua Smith aka Spook, may you rest in peace. The love for my son would never ever die. His father, Fitzroy Kenneth Smith Sr. This is a heads-up I'm going to give to the younger folks as I outlined earlier in this book. This is what caused the death of my son. The sickness that he developed in the last part of his life is very common in today's life. The sickness came from a blow to his head during an accident he had as a teenager. If you are getting headaches frequently from any type of blow to your head, seek medical help right away, such disease in your brain should be taken more seriously. I'm not saying that the blood clot in your brain is far worse than a blood clot in other parts of your body, but just remember, your brain does all the thinking. An aneurysm occurs when a blood vessel in the brain begins to grow like a balloon and bulge. This huge obstruction can lead and leak to rupturing that causes bleeding in the brain. Once an aneurysm has burst or broken, it becomes life-threatening. It can also go unnoticed.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Newman Springs Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Feb 13, 2022
• ISBN: 9781645313793

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My Prince

Fitzroy (Smitty) Smith

Copyright © 2020 Fitzroy (Smitty-Fitzie) Smith

All rights reserved

First Edition

NEWMAN SPRINGS PUBLISHING

320 Broad Street

Red Bank, NJ 07701

First originally published by Newman Springs Publishing 2019

ISBN 978-1-64531-378-6 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-1-64531-379-3 (Digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

To Edith Smith who does not have the slightest idea that one of her favorite grandson is no longer with us today. May you rest in peace son.

My son Kalan J.T Smith was born on April 2, 1992, but at first, I did not know the actual date. When Bernice moved out with the kids and all of the family belongings to an unknown address, it was an act of betrayal. In the beginning I did not know the sex of the baby that she was carrying whether it’s a male or female even though it did not matter to me. But unfortunately I found out the child was a boy, when he was about two to three months old.

At first, I had no desires to search for the kids and their mother whereabouts, but after deep reflection and serious thoughts, I realized that my kids should not be punished because of the ongoing issues with their mother and I. Moreover, I didn’t want them to experience the same upbringing that I had by not having a father figure in their lives. When my son Kalan was baptized, I was not invited to the ceremony. Yes I was very angry but as time went by, I overcame my anger, telling myself the damage had already done. But I was somewhat glad when I found out he was a boy because I already had two girls.

Finally, I got the courage and called one of our mutual friend Gloria and asked her if she had an idea where Bernice lived. She said, Fitz, I will do my best to find out where she and the children live. Give me a few days, and I will get back to you with the information that you are looking for.

I said to her, Please do because I’m very worried and concerned for the sake of those kids, especially, the baby boy Kalan. I tried to relax my mind after Gloria gave me confidence that she will find them. The following week, Gloria called me, she said, Professor, What I’m about to tell you, you are not going to believe it.

I said, Gloria, did you find them?

She laughed, she said, Not only did I find them, I know where they lived.

I said to her, Well, why don’t you tell me, the suspense is killing me. Where are they?

She said Bernice and the kids lived right under my sister Paula’s nose.

I said to Gloria, You’re kidding me.

She said, No, I’m not. They lived on Montgomery Street close to Utica Avenue, and you know my sister Paula lived up the block on Montgomery Street.

Gloria, lived on Crown Street, two blocks away. I said, do you know the house number? She said yes. She gave me the house number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper.

I thanked Gloria for a job well done. That same saturday afternoon, I decided to drive by the address that Gloria gave me. I drove down Montgomery Street looking for the house number. To my surprise, there was Felicia my eldest daughter holding a little child in her arms, on the front porch. I pulled up to the curb and parked my car right in front of the building. At first, Felicia didn’t recognize me because I was still seated in the car, but she kept looking towards me. Seeing those kids slowly diminished my anger toward their mother. I exited the car and walked toward the entrance gate and greeted Felicia with a hello. She looked at me with a smile on her face then said, Oh, hi, Daddy. I asked her is that the baby your mother conceived? She said yes with a smile.

The baby in Felicia’s arms turned around and looked toward me, I said, Hi, little man. He stared at me at just two months old. I was about to ask Felicia about her sister Nakesha and her brother Fitzroy Jr., but here comes Bernice standing between the front door. I looked at her straight in her eyes, I said, Hi, Bernice. No response. I said again, Hi, Bernice. She said hi with an attitude. I said, Where are the other two kids, Nakesha and Jr.? She said they are inside. I said, Can you go and get them?

She said, Excuse me, I’m no longer under your roof, and we are not together anymore, so you can’t boss me around.

I said, I’m not trying to boss you around, my desire is to see the other two kids. Before she did, here comes Jr. and Nakesha exiting through the front door.

Jr. ran toward me. He said Dad, Dad. I was so excited to see my kids. I greeted him hello, I asked him how he was doing. He just looked at his mother and smiled.

Nakesha then said, Oh, hi, Daddy. We were wondering when are you going to come and get us?

I said, Sweetheart, I had no idea where you and your siblings were living.

She said, Mommy didn’t tell you? I said no.

I looked at Bernice I said, You have a cute little baby boy.

She said, Well, thank you. She later commented that all her kids are beautiful! I said that is true.

Meanwhile, I turned toward Felicia and asked her, May I hold him? She looked back at her mother waiting for her approval, Bernice then permitted her to hand over my son. Felicia got up and handed me the baby. I could see that the baby was a little scared because it was the first time he saw me since he was born. I said, Hello, handsome. How are you doing? He turned his face and looked at his sister Felicia. I said, How old are you? Knowing that he was too young to answer back, Felicia spoke on his behalf and said, He is two months old.

Kalan with his sisters Felicia and Nakesha, and his brother Fitzroy Jr.

I spent as much time as possible with the kids, especially with my baby boy Kalan. Before I could hand Kalan back to Felicia, Bernice said, Can I have the baby because it’s getting late, and I have to feed him. I calmly walked toward her and gave her Kalan. She took him and went inside the apartment without saying a word. However, the other kids remained outside with me.

I turned to Felicia, and I asked her how she and her siblings are doing. She said, We are okay, it’s just that sometimes we don’t have much in the fridge to eat.

I said to her, How about now? Do you have anything to eat now?

She looked at her sister but before she can reply, Nakesha said, No, Daddy, we don’t have anything to eat, we only have a bottle of Pepsi. I replied to her okay.

Felicia said, We only had a little bowl of cereal for breakfast.

Just to confirm, I asked, Is that all? She nodded her head saying yes. Meanwhile, she looked back to see if her mother was still behind her.

I said to her, I’ll be right back. I’m going to the store and purchase food for everyone to eat.

They all jumped up and said, Daddy, Daddy, can we come?

I said, Ok, Felicia, go upstairs and tell your mother that I’m taking you all to the store. Before Felicia could get up, Nakesha ran pass her and told their mother.

Before I could head to the store, Benice came back downstairs she said, If you are going to buy these kids food, don’t forget Kalan—he can eat too.

I asked her, What would you like me to get for him?

She said, Buy him some juice and baby food. I went to the store around the corner on Utica Avenue and I bought whatever the kids needed. Upon leaving the store, (Bernice) was outside the store, she said dont forget the baby needs formula. She began to explain herself.

I said, that’s not necessary. How many bottle does he needed?

She said, How much can you afford?

I said, "These are my kids. I will give them anything that they desired.

She said, Okay, I know you have money, so you don’t have to show off.

I said, I wasn’t showing off. I’m just providing for my kids, not you.

She said, Okay, buy him six bottles.

I said, That’s not a problem. I went back into the store and I purchased the items she requested along with some additional items for the kids including candies.

After finding out where my kids lived, I became very involved in their lives. I visited my kids two or three times a week. Even though, their mother wasn’t too thrilled about it because she was dating some guy. Honestly, I couldn’t care less who she was dating as long as I get to spend quality time with my kids. My greatest and foremost concern was their well-being. During one of my visits, she took me up to her apartment, but to my surprise, the guy that she is dating was inside her apartment waiting for her. Arnold, Her boyfriend, came to the door and greeted me he asked how I was doing. I said I’m good. He said I heard you all talking so I wanted to see who she was speaking to. I didn’t want to alarm him, so I informed him that I came by to visit my kids.

He said, So you are their father? I said yes. He looked at Bernice and shook his head. He then put out his right hand and offered to shake my hands, and so I did.

Kalan on his first birthday with his older brother, Fitzroy Jr., Felicia and Nakesha.

As time went by, I decided to pay close attention to all of my kids especially Kalan because I always believed in the Bible verse that said, Do not spoil the child and spare the rod.

In spite of their mother’s disappointment, I made my kids my number one priority in my life because I wanted each one of them to have a decent upbringing. I did not let what transpired between their mother and I get in the way of the love and care that I have for my kids.

Kalan tried to compete with his bigger brother even though he knew that he was no match for him. Sometimes, I had to remind him to quit provoking his older brother Jr. Jr was the serious one while Kalan was the playful one.

This is a reminder to all parents whether you live in the same household or not, your obligation as a parent is to make sure that your kids get the best love and affection you have to offer because remember, as a parent, no one else should and cannot love your kids the way you do. You should treat them fairly and guide them in the right direction. Always maintain a proper and healthy relationship with each one of them because if anyone of your kids fails while