Beyond Grief

By Sharon Graves

Something we never imagined. We did not see it coming, and we wrestle daily to erase the stain of tragedy from our minds, to heal and hold on to to our mental health and sense of sanity. Losing a loved one is oftentimes painful enough even when expected or accepted under normal circumstances. But tragedy is mentally brutal, a sting of unrest rattling through the corridors of our consciousness replaying the how and the loss of our dear beloved.

Beyond grief there is a pathway to mental, spiritual, and heart healing, and to live, we must get to the otherside.

Finding peace and power beyond grief is a process we must embrace, a journey we must take, and a terrain we must tread to come into healing from tragedy and loss.

Whenever I looked at you (Daniel), talked with you, laughed with you, and even hugged you, I saw a lifetime. I never imagined you would be gone or that a lifetime would end so soon. If only I could have known, we could have talked more, laughed more, hugged more. I could have expressed more how much I appreciated you and told you how much I was proud of you and just how much I loved you. But the truth is, no matter how much more or how long, I still would not have been ready to let go of you.

How do you prepare for something like this? And now, we must learn to live with and live through what we were never prepared or ready for.

For a while, I wrestled about feeling like I was moving on without you. Now, I realize I take you with me in spirit and in my heart everywhere I go, and we go on together! I love you!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jun 30, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098081591

Book preview

Grief, Depression, and the Cover-Up

In the loss of a love one, a neighbor, a friend, we may come to acknowledge that grief has many layers of emotions and can manifest in various ways—laughter, anger, tears, mood swings, and yes, even depression, which may manifest with an appearance of normalcy, which can be, and oftentimes for some is, far from the truth. I know it was for me. I didn’t know how or when I fell into depression or when it came. All I know is that I was there. And it was in various ways. Whether in the presence of others or alone. Things started not being the same, feeling the same, or even looking the same. They just started losing meaning. I started feeling like something was missing and that I was drifting away. And in covering up my feelings/emotions.

I worked in depression, served in depression, laughed in depression, ate because of depression, isolated myself, lied to myself in and about depression, rocked myself to sleep and cried in depression. I contemplated giving up in depression. I smiled in depression, hugged in depression, and lied about being okay in depression. And yes, I even loved God in depression.

As a result of a tragic loss and trauma, depression crept in and took something else from me. I couldn’t quite put my finger on exactly what is was, but I felt something was missing. And overtime, I started losing interest in people and things or, shall I say, being connected to people and things. Depression is not only a mental challenge but a medical problem and must be confronted and dealt with, and yes, sometimes aggressively.

Don’t lose yourself or your sanity, but do rise up deal with and get help for depression.

There is hope, there is help, and there is love. You are not alone!

Beyond Grief

In the process of grief are thoughts, glimpses, and memories of you which brings me to a place of more grief. Grief that I am now realizing I must have if I’m going to begin the healing from this tragedy, if I’m going to regain strength, if I’m going to live again and fight my way back beyond this pain that has infiltrated my soul. Aches my heart and aches at the very thought of your absence and even so the act of your departure.

As over and over again it projects in my mind, I see your lifeless body lying on the ground of that fuel dock parking lot. I have to keep reminding myself, but life can’t stop here. I cannot die here,