Uncovering New Possibilities: Insights from Our Time

By Kimberly Weichel

Uncovering New Possibilities is rich with wisdom for each of us - exploring what we are learning during this pandemic era; insights about our emotional wellbeing; prioritizing feminine leadership skills; charting a renewal in our second half of life, exploring living a life with ethical and moral purpose, wisdom from ancient Eastern traditions, and more.

Kimberly Weichel ‘s new book "Uncovering New Possibilities” is filled with wisdom and possibilities for each of us, including enlightening Eastern healing and spiritual traditions, better understanding our emotions, behaviors, and instincts to live a more fulfilling life, uncovering how we can age with vigor and grace and why women’s leadership is so important at this time. Kim is absolutely the best-of-the-best! I recommend her excellent book with two thumbs up!!
- Dr. Paula Fellingham, Founder, Women of Excellence, Women of Faith

Kim Weichel is a wise, grounded, and inspiring author. Her new book is packed with creativity and new possibilities I found meaningful and timely. She weaves many insights from different perspectives and traditions, from exploring morality and how we follow our moral compass, living in peace during crisis, aging with enthusiasm, as well as remarkable personal insights.
- Tezikiah Gabriel, Gabriel Associates (NGO consulting/training); E.D., Pathways To Peace

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: May 16, 2021
• ISBN: 9781664171404

Kimberly Weichel

Kimberly Weichel is a thought leader, social entrepreneur, citizen diplomat, educator and nonprofit leader who has worked on the forefront of building bridges between cultures and peoples for over thirty years. She is a passionate champion of women’s and girl’s agency, empowerment, and leadership, and has led projects, organizations and trainings fostering women’s leadership for decades. She and her husband teach courses at the Lifelong Learning Institute at American University. She has received numerous awards and fellowships, including a Rotary Peace Fellowship. Kim’s broad global experience and cross-cultural background gives her a unique perspective, benefiting many communities through her work as a trainer, mentor, radio producer, speaker, and adviser to NGOs. She has led international programs, consulted with UN and other international agencies, and served on numerous boards. Kim is a notable author and her other books have had international appeal: Our Voices Matter: Wisdom, Hope and Action for Our Time (Xlibris); Beyond Borders: One Woman’s Journey of Courage, Passion and Inspiration (Xlibris); Inside Crossroads (McGraw-Hill); The Future of the Pacific Rim (Praeger); and Healing the Heart of the World featured her chapter “The Feminine Front Line” (Elite). www.kimweichel.org

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Copyright © 2021 by Kimberly Weichel.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 05/14/2021

Xlibris

844-714-8691

www.Xlibris.com

825520

CONTENTS

Why This Book?

Enhancing Our Spiritual and Emotional Wisdom

Living in Peace in Times of Crisis

Exploring Our Hidden Brain: How Emotions Shape Our Decisions

Challenging Our Tribal Nature

Women’s Leadership, Aging with Vitality, Gender Roles

It’s Time for Women to Lead

The Second Half of Life: Aging with Vigor and Grace

Transforming Entrenched Gender Roles: Educating Men and Boys

The Light My Fire Story

Lessons and Insights from Our Time

Lessons and New Possibilities for Our Time

In Search of Our Moral Compass

Wisdom of the East

Author Kimberly Weichel

Why This Book?

I wrote this book to help make sense of a confusing world, particularly during the challenging time of the pandemic. The virus has changed our world and each of us in many ways. It has made us rethink what is important and left us seeking answers and guidance. This book was sparked by my curiosity about what this time of extended lockdown and social upheaval is teaching us and how these lessons might shape our future. Since I believe that in every crisis there is also opportunity, I find it helpful to focus on new possibilities and what changes that we as individuals and our society need to address. We do not know if this extended pandemic—or future ones—will be with us for years to come. I take a deeper look at what we are learning now and what we hope might emerge from this time. Will we have changed or merely endured? What will be the legacy of this extraordinary time?

In many ways, it feels like we are going through a spiritual crisis in our country. People have found themselves close to life’s deeper questions, about how we live, how we suffer, and how we make meaning of our short time here on earth. For many the suffering of this past year has birthed an awakening. The process of reflection is just beginning, and where it takes us remains to be seen. I concur with others that say with the many fissures in our society—from political polarization to racial and economic inequality to loneliness and mistrust—what is really needed is to heal the soul of America. This book focuses on how we can begin to do that.

Effectively tackling a crisis always requires skilled leadership. I highlight recent excellent examples of women’s national leadership, showcasing the skills women bring that are crucial during a crisis. Importantly, I call for more women’s leadership at all levels to bring unity and caring to deeply divided nations. We need the qualities of feminine leadership that many women embody: being inclusive and empathetic, having long-term and holistic thinking, sharing power rather than hoarding power, and being guided by values—all essential qualities for the future.

We have all been stretched during this pandemic, needing to find our own balance. I explore how we can cope and even live in peace during a crisis, citing specific skills, resources, and practices to develop resilience. Many of us will face a crisis in our lives—whether personal, financial, health-related, the death of a loved one, or living in a pandemic—that can test us and change our lives. How can we practice self-care, respond to loss, develop resilience, and nurture our spirit?

In this time of accelerated change, we are asking ourselves some deeper questions, such as:

• How can we become more conscious of our own internal beliefs and emotional patterns to minimize counterproductive behavior or the repetition of errors? We explain in the chapter on the hidden brain that the answer lies in understanding how our inbuilt emotional systems and unconscious patterns are shaped from birth and greatly affect us throughout our lives. We need to increase our awareness and build our own safeguards to help us better thrive in our everyday lives.

• How can we go beyond our innate tribal instincts to connect with those outside of our tribe? We saw vividly in the polarized 2020 elections and its aftermath how deeply our tribal nature affects our whole society. Our tribal nature is hardwired and learned in early childhood and has become our default value. If we want to bridge divides, we need to understand the roots of tribalism and learn ways to go beyond our tribal instincts.

• How can we transform harmful gender stereotypes and cultural norms that perpetuate inequality and violence into working toward gender equality? How can we reframe the cultural assumptions of masculinity and what it means to be a man today to encourage men and boys to express their emotions and fears, and ask for help? We all have a role in shaping children’s understanding of what is acceptable and expected of them according to their gender, and providing early education and training is key.

• What does it mean to be a good person and lead a good life, and how do we live with moral and ethical purpose? Does the definition of good change over a generation? In the chapter In Search of Our Moral Compass, we describe that while morals are influenced by each culture, they are personal principles crafted and upheld by individuals themselves. Even though morals may vary from person to person, religion to religion, and culture to culture, many have been found to be universal, stemming from core human beliefs. This idea of a moral code extends beyond the individual to include what is determined to be right and wrong for a community, which is also known as the common good.

• How can timeless wisdom from Eastern thought help us at this time? In the chapter Wisdom of the East, we explore philosophies and religions that embody ancient wisdom and spirituality as well as Eastern holistic health practices, which have enriched our lives. Cultures in the Eastern hemisphere evolved along their own holistic, nature-based sciences that rely on the intuitive right brain forms of knowing, and on holistic forms of healing. We share teachings and insights from many sages and prophets.

• What are some of the most effective ways to support small-scale development projects? Key to The Light My Fire Story is giving small grants to women-led, grassroots organizations, which have the potential for greater impact. We select projects that are effective, sustainable, and replicable, and share stories of how this support has resulted in transformed and empowered communities.

Writing a book takes a village of support. I’d like to thank my co-authors: my friend and co-trainer Joanne Huskey (It’s Time for Women to Lead), my friend and mentor Tezikiah Gabriel (Living in Peace in Times of Crisis), my friend and collaborator Paula Fellingham (The Second Half of Life), my friend and colleague Ellen Boneparth (The Light My Fire Story), and particularly my husband Carl Weichel (Exploring Our Hidden Brain, In Search of a Moral Compass, Wisdom of the East, and Challenging Our Tribal Nature) for his ongoing support, advice, and excellent writing and editing.

I would like to dedicate this book to the many courageous people who speak up and take a stand, whether they are journalists uncovering injustice, citizens standing for fair policies, human rights advocates demanding rights, moms taking action for gun control, women speaking up about sexual abuse, or health care workers standing for equal opportunity to health care. It takes courage to stand up for our beliefs without shrinking from criticism, but that is what is needed if we want to effect change. Silence often signals agreement.

It’s the ombudsmen and whistleblowers of society who call out criminal behavior, illegal activity, or immoral policy, often at great cost. It is the ordinary people who do extraordinary things to help others. It’s the citizens who run for office, volunteer in their community, or start a new initiative that benefits society. These are our heroes, and I thank them for their courage, commitment, and service. We know that each of our voices matter. Your voice matters.

Enhancing Our Spiritual and

Emotional Wisdom

As we begin to come out of this coronavirus pandemic era, we realize that a crisis—whether personal, national, or global—can happen at any time. When it does, our lives can be thrown into turmoil, disrupting all aspects of our daily lives. We saw this clearly during the pandemic and the subsequent lockdown. It opened our eyes to the importance of preparation, self-care, and inner peace, which can be our greatest source of strength. The chapter on Living in Peace in Times of Crisis focuses on the many steps we can take to build resilience and respond to the crisis so it doesn’t overwhelm us. Living through a crisis can make us stronger and more able to deal with life’s challenges in the future.

Likewise, exploring the roots of the unconscious patterns that drive our behavior can help us make more informed decisions to benefit our well-being. As we explore in the article Exploring Our Hidden Brain, our unconscious behavior can cause us to make the same errors over and over, in which our actions are at odds with our intentions. Yet most of us are unaware of their influence. For example, we may unconsciously sabotage the job interview because of past warnings to not achieve more than a sibling, do things we don’t really intend to because of past conditioning, or limit our choices in a mate because of unconscious biases. Our inbuilt emotional systems and unconscious patterns are shaped from birth and greatly affect our day-to-day lives until we work to comprehend them. Understanding our hidden brain and building safeguards against its idiosyncrasies can help us be more successful in our everyday lives.

We have seen vividly in the polarized 2020 elections and its aftermath how deeply our tribal nature affects us. Our tribal nature is hardwired and learned in early childhood. Human opinions and emotions, loyalties and affiliations, religion, customs, and even perceptions are shaped by our need to belong to a group and by our proclivity to hate rival groups. Tribalism has unfortunately become our default value. We develop stereotypes of other groups of people, call them names, and worse. The chapter Challenging Our Tribal Nature explores the roots of tribalism, which arises from our attempts to distinguish cooperative from noncooperative strangers. To help make that distinction, we develop social indicators of shared values like social rituals, language, and clothes, and adjust our behavior towards others accordingly. Yet the effects of tribalism have caused enormous implications in our society where group commitments become more powerful than reason itself. The chapter examines how we can go beyond our tribal instincts to appeal to our common humanity.

In the midst of hate, I found there was

within me an invincible love.

In the midst of tears, I found there was

within me an invincible smile.

In the midst of chaos, I found there was

within me an invincible calm.

I realize through it all, that in

the midst of winter, there was

within me an invincible summer.

And that makes me happy.

For it says that no matter how hard

the world pushes against me,

within me there’s something stronger,

something better, pushing right back.

French writer and philosopher

Albert Camus

Living in Peace in Times of Crisis

With Tezikiah Gabriel

Each one has to find his peace from within. And peace to

be real must be unaffected by outside circumstances.

—Mahatma Gandhi

Our experience as longtime peacebuilders is that it is much easier to live in peace when things are going well than during a time of crisis or challenge. A crisis can come in many forms: a global pandemic, the end of a relationship, loss of a job, financial loss, a health crisis, death of a loved one, loss of a home, among others. When crisis hits, our daily lives can be thrown into turmoil, causing real disruption. We feel that this is when nurturing inner peace is most significant as it can be our greatest source of strength. It can also be a survival mechanism that not only helps us cope with the crisis at hand but also gives us the fortitude and authenticity to be a compassionate, caring, and responsive support to others. Authentic peacebuilding calls us to live the experience of peace ourselves regardless of our external environment. It is both a challenge and a reward.

We take comfort from the notion that we can choose and create peace through the choices we make. That means that while we may have little or no control over the external