Secret Predator: Abuse from Within

By Ray Powers

The events that Ray endured took place in rural Idaho in the mid-1980s and ’90s—where he has fallen prey to a secret predator who befriended him at a young age. Just after his teenage years of life, his world is about to change forever, as he is forced to grow up, leaving his childhood behind him when he is compelled to make a decision between love and deception. While it seems that all hope is lost and Ray has lost faith in humanity, a new beacon of hope emerges from the darkness to save him from losing everything.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 23, 2020
• ISBN: 9781664149205

Ray Powers

Ray Powers is a first-time author. He resides in a small city with his wife, four children, and five grandchildren, where he has had a good life full of experiences—from living through childhood abuse to war in two different countries, where he received many awards. He has used his life experiences as inspiration to create his book—in hopes that this will be the first of many books to come.

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Copyright © 2021 by Ray Powers.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 12/19/2020

Xlibris

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Dedication

I would like to dedicate this book to the following people. For my mom who did her best during trying times and who feels responsible for the troubling events that transpired. You are not to blame for what happened. For my grandma who was always there to help us out and guide us in the right direction. Mostly for my wife who is my beacon of light that saved me from losing everything.

This is a story about how sex abuse starting at a young age can happen and also how a predator grooms and sets up the abuse and how the abused victims become very subservient very quickly as to keep the abuser happy. It also covers how to handle the abuse after it is over. If the abused victims don’t deal with the aftermath of the abuse, it can affect their entire life; and in some cases, it can have devastating results. Victims of sexual abuse are just that—victims; they have nothing to be ashamed of. But sex abuse is something that should not be kept a secret; it should be brought out into the light. Sex abuse at any age can have a lasting effect on you for a lifetime. You never really heal.

Contents

Dedication

Introduction

Chapter 1    The Beginning

Chapter 2    It Started

Chapter 3    Games

Chapter 4    Recap

Chapter 5    Cocoon

Chapter 6    Reporting

Chapter 7    The Light

Chapter 8    Aftermaths

Chapter 9    Making a Life

Summary

Glossary

Introduction

DEVELOPMENT

The events that transpired took place from 1985 to 1991 in Garden City, Idaho. One of the individuals involved was me, Ray; I was born in Idaho in 1973 with my mom, Kathrine; an absentee father, Jeffrey; and three sisters, one of whom died from cystic fibrosis, a lung disease. We lived with my grandmother Doreen because we had no place else to go once my dad left us. I grew up with just a bunch of girls around me, and I really did not know how to act. I was a shy kid, very insecure, and always felt that no one liked me. I had one main friend, Brian; we became friends because I would steal his bike all the time and then hide it in my grandmother’s backyard because the chain would come off and I would panic. Mom remarried a man from England; his name was Collin. He was a con man and a very abusive alcoholic and an all-around mean piece of shit who eventually got sent back to England after being arrested in Utah in 1988 and died alone in his apartment in 1989.

Scott came into the picture of my life in 1980 when he let me help the scouts sell first aid kits around the neighborhood; he was a scout leader and young men’s spiritual adviser for our church. He played Santa Claus every year because he looked the part—large and round—and seemed to be a very nice and generous man. He was married to Masa who always acted like she was mad or just unhappy, and every time you would see her, she would never smile. But once you got to know her, she would act nice to you, but she still seemed very bitter about life. She looked just like her husband, Scott—very unattractive—but she was shorter. In December of 1980, Scott became a common person around our house, bringing my sisters and I Christmas presents and just checking on the family. That year, while selling first aid kits, I was hit by a car and got hurt very bad. I had my leg severed nearly all the way, only hanging on by a tendon; I spent most of the summer in the hospital because back then you would stay in the hospital even to get your tonsils out. So I was there for the long haul, and I couldn’t come home until I was able to straighten my leg. My leg was in a permanent bent position and had to be forced straight once I had healed enough.

I started to notice Scott around the house in December at Christmas when he came to the house dressed as Santa; I thought it was because he felt very guilty about letting me sell the first aid kits when I wasn’t even old enough to be in scouts yet. He would come and pick me up and take me on motorcycle rides on his big Gold Wing motorcycle, and it made me feel special that someone was noticing me since my mom had her hands full with my sisters—but mostly my youngest sister because she was the sick one. Scott would bring us food over for the holidays because we were very poor, and it showed. You could tell just by looking at my sisters and me. The way we dressed was pretty shabby. My mom only worked some of the time because she was taking care of a dying little girl, who passed in 1983. Her passing was very hard on all of us; my mom was not always around for us to mourn with because of her new husband. Mom got married in 1982 to Collin. He was also a heavy smoker, and he smoked around my sister who had a serious lung disease, and I think that he shortened her life a bit because of all the smoking he did around her.

My grandma’s house was an old kind of run-down house from the early 1900s; it did not have a user-friendly floor plan. The house had a large front room and dining combined with a kitchen in the back of the house. There was one bedroom on the main floor of the home, and that was Grandma’s room. The only bathroom was accessed through her room. Then there was a set of stairs in the middle of the house going up to a big upstairs loft. It was just an open floor plan, and we just had our beds lined up in a row—no separating between the beds and no privacy. My mom had cleaned out the basement, and that was where she and Collin lived. I was glad that he was not upstairs with us, but my sick sister would spend a lot of time down there with my mom and Collin and all his smoking. She was his favorite. He was not mean to her, but he was to the rest of us.

* * *

I started Cub Scouts in 1981, but Scott was not my scout leader because he was a Boy Scout leader, and I was a Cub Scout until I turned twelve. In 1985, once I turned twelve, I was excited to be in Scott’s troop. He would do a lot of fun and cool stuff with the boys in his troop. He would take the boys either up to a cabin or camping in the sand dunes, and he would take the boys to the gym and play racquetball and swim—stuff like that; he was an all-around fun guy. That year in 1985, I got to know more of Scott. He had me and some other boys helping him set up for a dinner party that he was throwing, and that was when I got my first taste of pornography. It was a pinup calendar with all nude ladies. I had never seen that before; it was very exciting. Later in 1985 was when the sexual abuse started, and it started at the gym. Scott was very involved with all the young boys in our church. Little did I know, it was his in as a predator. I don’t know how many boys were abused over the years. I am sure I wasn’t the first, and I am sure I wasn’t going to be the last.

What was done can never be undone.

Chapter 1

THE BEGINNING

Growing Pains

Do you ever really truly know your friends, family, neighbors, scout leaders, church leaders, or just someone you meet at the bus stop? There is not one group that you can say, He or she is a predator, and they want to keep it that way by any means necessary. When I was growing up, I had a typical American name; my name