My Testimony

By Jewel Blackshear

In My Testimony, I open my closet to give you a glimpse of some of the pitfalls, pain, and adversities that I experienced. I also share how I was victorious in overcoming adversity after I learned to take ownership for my actions. I share how I accepted my charge to make the appeal that folks stop doing wrong and calling it right.

My heartfelt desire for you is that you exercise Godly wisdom to avoid some pitfalls that can cause much trauma and significant drama. The key to avoiding some of the major painful experiences is to completely trust God. He stands ready to grant us the desires of our hearts; however, we tie his hands through our willful acts of disobedience to his Word, his way, and his will.

In some instances, it took me a long time to obtain wisdom because, for so long, I insisted on being stuck on stupid. For too long, I was determined to do things my way. I did not give any serious thoughts to the devastating consequences to me and to those connected to me.

In My Testimony, I candidly reveal my exposure to major church hurt. There is no hurt like church hurt. But I survived it, and I want you to know that so can you. Those tests serve to make you better, not bitter! I learned that forgiveness is a matter of the heart.

My experiences have given me the ability to be bold, real, transparent, and explicit in my appeal to encourage folks to abandon their evil and wicked ways. God is not mocked! The Word of God is clear in that we will reap what we sow!

I share with you how I learned to allow God to come into my life and super rule, trusting him unconditionally with my life for he is my creator and he knows what is best for me. I want to encourage believers to be true followers of Christ—living a life that is pleasing and acceptable in the sight of God.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Apr 24, 2019
• ISBN: 9781796029437

Book preview

Copyright © 2019 by Jewel Blackshear.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Author photo by Leticia Shaw

Rev. date: 04/23/2019

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CONTENTS

Foreword

Introduction

The Hand of God Is upon Me

My Guide Book

What Is My Purpose?

Surrendering to the Calling

Hurt from the Pulpit

Season of Preparation

Do You Want To Be Made Well?

Deliverance Cometh

Sound the Alarm

Help from the Pulpit

Faith Is Working

Walk-on-Water Faith

A Date with Destiny

Call for Change

Favor From God

Poems

Richly Blessed

Who Is This Man?

Blessings Beyond The Battle

What Do You See When You Look At Me?

Something Worth Telling

A Joyous Journey

In Memory of Lester and Ruth Blackshear

Foreword

I have grown to understand that nothing happens by coincidence but by divine orchestration through the hands of our Lord. Well, the simple fact that you are reading this book is no exception. In your hands is a powerful account of life’s journey of Evangelist Jewel Blackshear, one of God’s precious and chosen vessels. Blackshear, affectionately called by me, shares through her life’s testimony her decision to live for Christ and to boldly proclaim His word in this sin-sick world.

I am truly grateful that my Lord and Savior favored me when He strategically designed our chance meeting twenty years ago in a Vacation Bible School Class where she served as class instructor. It was an unexpected encounter yet a divinely designed plan for our lives. Since our encounter, Blackshear has been diligent and consistent in her leadership, guidance, training, teaching, witnessing, and encouragement to me and many others about our Lord and Savior. She is a woman who is truly passionate about the Lord, His word, and His people. Now through God’s guidance and her obedience, she shares her testimony by pulling back the curtains and allowing us personal insight into her life, the source of her determination and the development of the firm foundation that was birthed within her.

This book will truly encourage and inspire you to contend earnestly for your faith and to defend the word of God. It will help you understand that, as Christians, it is not only your personal responsibility but also a privilege for you to strive, struggle, and defend your faith. In this book, Blackshear shares truth and helps you see that a life with Christ requires an intentional decision to change.

She shares with us that even though you may be a sold-out and on-fire witness for the Lord that sometimes God will allow pain in your life to wake us up. However, in this book, she encourages us by giving basic principles to help us navigate through the valleys, turbulent terrains, and rocky trials of life. Yet most importantly, this book proclaims that our personal life experiences, good and bad, can work together to bring God glory. This book will help you see that God created every life with purpose, including yours.

I am profoundly proud to recommend this book, not only does it encourage us, but it also motivates us to seek God, study His word, live according to His word, and defend what we love—the doctrine of Christ.

Evangelist Evangeline Rentz

Introduction

The word that came to Jeremiah from the LORD, saying, Thus speaks the LORD God Israel, saying: "Write in a book for yourself all the words that I have spoken to you."

—Jeremiah 30:1-2

Before I was formed in my mother’s womb, God planted in me the desire to write. Before I learned to write, while in elementary school, I would purchase packs of lined paper. I would fill those pages up with squiggly lines. I pretended those squiggly lines were words. It delighted me to see the pages of paper filled with my writing even though they were just squiggly lines.

The desire to write never went away. It continued to grow and grow. So today you hold in your hands the fruit of that desire.

The Spirit of the Lord compels me to share My Testimony. Because I have traveled the stony, rocky roads of life, I am compelled to share some of my experiences that propelled me to seek God, to listen to God, and to strive diligently to obey God. I have had to tackle climbing insurmountable mountains. I have struggled with some vicious and malicious spirits. I have fought some strong, formidable, frightening foes. I have danced and partied to the tune of the world’s band. I was intoxicated with the spirits of pleasure and gratification. I flirted with fleshly desires and succumbed to the wiles of the enemy’s agents. I was addicted to the world’s standards, and I had an insatiable desire to be accepted by the world’s people. I was blind, and I could not see. I was sin-sick, and I ignored God’s plan for my life. The spirit of distraction was my constant companion.

I defied the perfect will of God for my life solely to do things my way. I was a willing victim to my flesh. My flesh was stubborn and steadfast in getting satisfaction how she wanted it; when she wanted it; and where she wanted it. I was determined to exercise my independence. I was unwavering in resisting the pursuit of God’s perfect will for my life. I was blind to the enemy’s plan to kill me; to steal my future; and to destroy my life.

In spite of experiencing many dark periods in my life, I now recognize that God was working things out for my good. I have become a sold-out, on-fire witness that God allows pain in our lives to wake us up. During the turbulent times in my life, I learned some valuable lessons. The primary lesson for me was to take responsibility for my actions. It was no one’s fault but my own of how I responded to disappointment, hurt, pain, and persecution. I quit playing the blame game. I changed my perspective. I took ownership of my behavior. I stopped seeing myself as a victim. I learned that I am a victor through Christ (Romans 8:37).

I am compelled to share My Testimony. I am hoping that My Testimony will be a beacon of hope for a wandering soul. I am hoping that My Testimony will inspire someone to contend earnestly for the faith (see Jude 3). I am hoping that My Testimony will provoke someone to change all his or her ways and behaviors that are contrary to God’s word, His way, and His will. I am hoping that My Testimony will cause the person that’s traveling on the road of destruction to change their direction. I am hoping that My Testimony will inspire someone to seek God. I am hoping that My Testimony will lead someone to Christ Jesus, my Lord and Savior. I am hoping that My Testimony will inspire someone to not give in to the temptations designed to make you quit life.

I am compelled to share some of my experiences with you. It is my hope that you are able to glean something from my experiences that would prevent you from making some of the same mistakes that I made. Also, it is my heartfelt desire that if your flesh now reigns supreme, causing you to sin perpetually, that you will immediately repent. I pray that you will learn to trust God and lean not to your own understanding (see Proverbs 3:5-7). It is also my heartfelt desire that, by faith, the word of God will grow in your heart and mature you, and you will produce abundant fruit in the kingdom of God.

Do you not know that when traveling this journey called life, you will have trials, troubles, and tribulations? Difficulty will come knocking at your door. Being a Christian does not guarantee you a trouble-free life. However, do not fret, be of good cheer because Jesus will not leave nor forsake you. Jesus declares in God’s word, that He has overcome the world (John 16:33). It is my desire that you do not allow adversity to make you bitter, but allow it to make you better.

The psalmist in Psalm 119:71 declares, "It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes. It is life-changing to be willing to learn from your afflictions. If you do not face trials with a willingness to learn and to grow, those very trials will inhibit your spiritual growth and will impede your ability to learn God’s spiritual principles for maturing you as a saint" [Freeda Bowers, Give Me 40 Days: An Invitation for an Encounter With God].

It is my belief that our pitfalls (trouble, afflictions, difficulties, trials, tribulations, defeat, pain, hurt) are the things that God uses to grow and mature us into vessels for His use, and if we do not learn the message from His word, we will keep experiencing the same trip around the same mountain.

I have learned, whenever I encounter pitfalls, to ask God to reveal the lesson that I need to learn because I know that all things work together for my good (see Romans 8:28). Knowing His word enables me to raise my praise to Him even in the midst of my pain and suffering.

It is my sincere desire that when you encounter pitfalls, you will not respond with worry or with feelings of depression, anxiety, fear, or defeat; nor with complaining, whining, or grumbling; but you will put your trust in God, knowing that God’s purpose in your affliction is to give you a future and a hope (see Jeremiah 29:11).

In telling My Testimony, I will share with you who Christ Jesus is to me, and in doing so, you will get to know Him better. It is my heartfelt desire that you will accept Him as Lord and Savior of your life. As a result, many believed in His name, observing His signs which He was doing (John 2:23). To become all that God created you to be and to do, it is important that you develop a strong personal relationship with God through His Son, Christ Jesus by the Holy Ghost (see 1 John 1:7).

I am sharing some of my experiences with you in the hope that you will become enlightened, encouraged, and energized. If you are not already on a journey of seeking God, His kingdom, and His righteousness, then I beseech you to make it your first priority.

The Hand of God Is upon Me

But now, O

LORD

, You are our Father; we are the clay, and You our potter; and all we are the work of Your hand.

—Isaiah 64:8

One day I was looking back over my life, and it hit me! The realization of the moment caused me to pause. I was struck with an indescribable awe! I recognized how God had miraculously orchestrated my journey. I experienced a wave of emotions that sent me reeling! It was a discovery that humbled me. God loves me!

I was born into a situation that labeled me an at-risk child. The probability of me having a good life was relatively low, but God flipped the script on my future.

I think about where I came from, and I am just profoundly mystified. I am amazed! Now I can clearly see God’s hand upon me! From the time of my conception up until this time in my life, God has been working things out for my good.

Eleanor Harris and Seth Carver were the vehicles that God used to get me here. (My biological parents’ names have been changed.) But God chose Lester and Ruth Blackshear to train me in the way that I should go.

Eleanor Harris and Seth Carver met. They engaged in sexual interaction. I was conceived. They both were young, and being burdened with the responsibility of raising a child was probably a bit too much for them. I imagine Seth splits. I have no idea how he reacted when he learned that Eleanor was pregnant with me. Did he try to deny that he was the father? Was he delighted? Was he thrilled to be a daddy for the first time? Did he experience a great degree of anxiety? Those are just a few of the questions that I never asked Seth, although this inquiring mind wanted to know. Whatever Seth and Eleanor shared was not enough to keep Seth around to share in the responsibility of raising a child.

I know that he was not moved to partake of the nuptials—making Eleanor his wife so together they would raise me, their beautiful, darling baby girl. A fairy-tale ending was not in the stars for us.

So Eleanor had the burden of raising me on her own. At the tender age of eighteen, she was a mother-to-be. What were her feelings? Was she ecstatic? Or was she full of regrets, sending me, her unborn bundle of joy, streams of negative vibes—You are a major mistake!

I just imagine that Eleanor wrestled with the burden of caring for a baby. I suspect that I was a burden, more than she wanted to handle in that junction of her life. Did she pray and ask God for direction? Was she alone in her deliberations? Did she seek counsel, or was she left to her own devices in resolving what must have been a trying and arduous task? What options did she ponder for what must have been a daunting situation? How did being an unwed mother fit into her plans? She was facing the responsibility of raising a baby all by herself.

I imagine that it was a life-changing experience for Eleanor to decide to give birth to me. What was her support system? I do not know, but what I do know is it did not consist of Seth. She was left alone with securing the resources for the provisions it took to raise a child. Did Eleanor consider me a hinderance, which prevented her from enjoying life? I imagine that I was a burden and not a joy!

But God! God will provide what you need when you need it! Along come Bettye and Vicey (daughters of Lester and Ruth Blackshear), volunteering to babysit me. Bettye, on one of those occasions, asked Eleanor if they could keep me. Why would they want me? Their household is already full. Why would they want to add to an already busting at the seams household? Their youngest in the brood of four children was ten years old. Why start over again with a baby?

Eleanor’s response was yes. So I become the bouncing baby of Lester and Ruth Blackshear. After being with my new family for a few months, Eleanor returned to gather me up and take me away to live with her and her new husband. Things do not always last! Her marriage was no exception. So back to Lester and Ruth Blackshear I went. (The hand of God is