Fabulous Faithful & Free: A Transformational Guide to Loving Yourself with Boldness

By Juanita R. Ingram Esq.

Are you stuck in a dead-end situation? Do you know you have great potential inside, but fear youll always fall short? Do you feel like youre letting yourself down? Fabulous, Faithful and Free is your roadmap from stuck to stellar! In Fabulous, Faithful and Free, Juanita takes you step-by-step through a personal transformation that will unlock your unique gifts, reveal your true beauty, and unleash your wildest dreams.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Apr 9, 2018
• ISBN: 9781973615088

Juanita R. Ingram Esq.

Juanita Ingram, Esq. is a talented triple threat! This multi-faceted modern day maven is an internationally recognized Attorney, Author, and Actress. She often speaks on self-worth and womens empowerment topics addressing the importance of education, personal development, and of course, style! Originally from Chattanooga, Juanita holds a BBA in Accounting, MBA and Juris Doctorate degrees. She is a licensed attorney with 15+ years of corporate and private practice experience She was awarded the Up and Coming Leadership in Law Award in 2007 and was named Top 40 under 40 in 2004. As an advocate for young girls and women, Juanita travels internationally speaking on various topics regarding female empowerment and self-worth; delivering motivational messages to women and children throughout the US, Europe & the UK. She is the first African-American woman to compete and win the title of Mrs. Indiana United States in 2007 and has since gone on to compete and become the first African-American Ms. World International 2012, Mrs. Great Britain World 2011, Mrs. UK Universe 2013, and Mrs. UK International 2014. Madame Noir acknowledged her as one of the Top 7 Black Women in Pageantry to turn Beauty into Business along with Halle Berry, Oprah Winfrey, and Vanessa Williams. Juanita uses her legal skills, business tenacity, and impeccable style to bring fashion and philanthropy together as the Founder of Dress for Success Greater London, an organization that helps disadvantaged women become economically independent by styling them and giving them interview attire, career training, and on-going support. She is also an award nominated actress in both TV and Film. Juanita is the creator of The Wonderfully Made Pals Presents, a multi-ethnic Christian childrens book series having a mission of introducing the word of God to kids - which includes the publications Kind Kinsley, Wonderfully Made Wanita, Confident Kenan, Carisas Curls, Heng & the Holy Spirit, and Generous Gregerio. She also published two Christian inspirational books for women, Winning with Christ Finding the Victory in Every Experience and Beauty for Ashes Transforming Testimonies for Every Woman.

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Copyright © 2018 Juanita R. Ingram, Esq.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-9736-1509-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-1510-1 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-1508-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018900844

WestBow Press rev. date: 04/06/2018

Contents

Introduction

Why should you read this book?

Pardon My French: Self-Esteem Sucks.

What is Fabulous?

Nothing Special. Nothing at All.

From Ordinary to Extraordinary.

Chapter 1 The Power Of The 3 Ps – Positivity, Preparation, And Permission

Being Fabulous Means Rising Above Mediocrity.

Positivity

Preparation

Permission

Purpose

Chapter 2 Free!

I’m a mess. How can I rise above myself?

Letting go of past mistakes.

From mess to manifesting goodness.

Chapter 3 Finances, Fashion, And Focus – Be Fabulous On Any Budget

1. Financial Stability is Self-Care

Authentic peace is priceless

Invest first in learning

2. Don’t Compromise Your Future for Today’s Look: Pay Yourself First.

Strategies for Savvy Shopping:

Chapter 4 Beauty Is Energy, Balance, Radiance, And Polish

1. Love The Body You Have

Don’t shrink yourself

Exercise for Health and Symmetry.

Transform your flaws with love.

2. Celebrate Your Uniqueness.

Less is Not More – Modesty and Class.

Shop for fit, not for size

Take yourself on an adventure of discovery

3. Polish Your Look

Function and form - suit your purpose.

Essential Wardrobe Pieces:

4. Finish Your Look; You’re Worth The Attention

The Top Ten:

Expand Your Options:

Tops:

Bottoms:

Shoes:

Accessories:

Jewelry:

Everything Else:

Chapter 5 The Terrible Trend Of Big Butts!

1. But Is A Verbal Eraser.

But Negates Our Value And Uniqueness.

But Negates Our Dreams And Experiences.

2. Is Your Big But Holding You Back?

Insecurity Opens The Door To Manipulation.

Don’t Let But Erase Your Life.

3. The Power Of Your Words.

Find Your Cheering Squad.

Be Someone’s Cheering Squad.

Chapter 6 What It Takes To Be Fabulously Successful

1. Priorities, Goals, Self-management, and Grit.

2. Manage Your Time, Manage Yourself: Show Your Future Self Some Love.

Visualization Sparks Motivation

3. The Power Of GRIT

You Pull Out Your GRIT.

Grace

Resilience

Integrity

Tenacity

Chapter 7 How To Be Free - The Workbook

How To Use This Planner

WORKBOOK

READINESS Part 1. Financial Self-Care

READINESS Part 2: My Beauty Adventure

READINESS Part 3. Wardrobe Inventory

READINESS Part 4. Polish Plan

Dedication

This book is dedicated to my grandmother Mrs. Greather Juanita Tinker. Thank you for always being there for me and for showing me what it means to be Fabulous, Faithful, and Free!

Introduction

Why should you read this book?

Good question. Maybe you’re curious about the title or the picture on the cover. Perhaps you like beauty pageants and think you might get some hair and makeup tips. And if that’s all you want out of it, that’s all you’ll get. Frankly, you’ll just be wasting your time. But if you want to get more, then dive in!!

What you get out of this book is the same as you get out of life – it depends on your WHY. If you’ve got a little why, you’ll make a minimal effort, and get a minimum result. If you have a great big why, you’ll take colossal action and get unbelievable results.

Read this book because you want to be fabulous! I won’t let you down.

Pardon My French: Self-Esteem Sucks.

There’s one thing you should know about me right off. I hate self-esteem! If you’ve got any self-esteem right now, I want you to just throw it right out the window.

Hang on! I can hear you saying it. I picked up this book about being fabulous because I want to feel better about myself. I want more self-esteem, better self-esteem, not less! Juanita, you’re crazy.

Listen, I want you to feel great about yourself. I already know you’re fabulous, and I want you to know it too. But I don’t want you to sit around trying to build up your self-esteem when you could have something so much better.

We hear a lot about building up children’s self-esteem or helping women gain self-confidence to make positive changes in their lives. What it usually comes down to is affirmation: hearing good things about yourself, or saying them to yourself. The affirmations are lovely. It’s an excellent tool in its place. Lord knows I like hearing it! But affirmations alone do not change the way you think about yourself deep down. It doesn’t change your choices, and it doesn’t change the trajectory of your life. Self-esteem that comes from someone else’s affirmation keeps you dependent on other people’s opinions. It’s shallow because it comes from things other people notice. It can even drive you to unhealthy relationships because it’s an emotional vacuum that always needs filling with attention and praise.

I want you to develop something much better: self-worth and self-efficacy. These mindsets free you from other people’s opinions and create a deep well of security that can carry you on the long road to success. They are with you on good days and bad because you can cultivate them with deliberate action.

Self-worth understands your identity. You are unique, with gifts and experiences that allow you to do something in the world nobody else can do quite the same way. In my faith, we call it created in the image of God and created with kingdom purpose. You may call it basic human dignity and the purpose of your existence. Either way, it means that people are precious. They should be treated with love, honor, respect, and kindness. You should be treated with love, honesty, respect, and understanding, not because you did something special or because you’re smart or pretty, but because you are a human being. It’s just that simple.

You see the difference? Self-worth isn’t a feeling – it’s a principle. It never changes. You’re not ever going to stop being a precious human being because you feel fat, or lost a job, or made a mistake. Self-worth puts you into healthy relationships because you see that other people are precious too, and you treat them with love, respect, and kindness.

Self-efficacy is the confidence that you can do a particular task or learn a specific skill. It knows deep down inside that yeah, I could do that. The fantastic thing about self-efficacy is that it grows and spreads. You may not have a lot of amazing skills right now, but there is something in life you feel competent and empowered to do. Taking some small step toward the mastery of other skills will further confirm your confidence in your own capability. The more skills you master, the more significant your circle of efficacy gets, and the further you’re willing to stretch.

Here’s the secret - everything is a skill that can be learned. Effective communication? Skill. Studying? Skill. Interviewing for the job you want? Skill. Public Speaking? Skill. Dressing in a manner that enhances your positive attributes? Skill. You can learn them, and mastering skills makes you believe and have a certain level of faith that you can learn many others as well. Self-efficacy is the sustainable green energy of your life because you can’t use it up and you can always grow more.

What is Fabulous?

Okay, so what exactly is being Fabulous? It might be a little different for everyone. Here’s what it means to me: Fabulous is looking great and feeling great, but it’s so much more than that, too. Fabulous means being a woman of substance, accomplishment, character, and integrity. It means having high ideals and following through on them. It means working – working hard – for the betterment of yourself, your family, and your community. It means honoring who you are, getting to know who you are and who you want to become, and loving yourself entirely, and unconditionally, without exception – flaws and all!

To be Fabulous, you must be Faithful to your true self and your highest values. You must know and accept your strengths and your weaknesses. You must choose a path that you’re proud to claim, and walk it with daily decisions that follow through on your commitments. It takes a substantial purpose, a growing character, a desire to honor yourself and others, and acquiring something I call GRIT (I’ll tell you all about that later.)

The journey from Faithful to Fabulous will also make you Free - free of limiting thoughts and fears. Free from dependency upon other people’s approval. Free from past mistakes or life obstacles. Free to fulfill your dreams and your full potential, and make a positive impact in the world. Free to enjoy your work, your relationships, and your successes.

Now you may be wondering who I am, and why I’m qualified to tell you anything. Maybe that picture on the cover makes you feel like I don’t know anything about your life or where you come from. Let me tell you a little about my life and where I come from. We probably have more in common than you think.

Nothing Special. Nothing at All.

Maybe you think you’re nothing special. I once felt that way as well. I’m just a little Southern girl from Tennessee. I was a cross between nerdy and somewhat cool in school – I straddled the fence of either teenage worlds or groups. My Coke-bottle glasses were so thick; my nickname was Focus in middle school, then Peppers in college when my switch to contacts revealed my wide-set eyes that my