Crush: A Collection of Poetry

By Jill Niebuhr

Times of struggle, loneliness, and conflict are common. Crush offers comfort in our difficulty. It offers hope that these times will pass, that we can get through anything, and it is very possible to live with love in our hearts and life. When you read how people that have passed touched Niebuhr's heart you will relate and lean on the good in people. You will remember we all have someone to look up to and not everything needs to be understood. We come to our truths in time. Crush offers up one author's truths for all to see.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jun 16, 2016
• ISBN: 9781524614218

Jill Niebuhr

Jill Niebuhr has gotten awards for several poems including In Light, Playground, and Disrupted. She has read poems at funerals and shows. She writes about madness, boldness, being a victim of rape, nature, and salvation. There is a chapter about learning to love and one of haiku. She is currently getting a degree in Political Science, known as Musician Jmn, and writing new poems and new songs at a positive and encouraging point in life. She plays piano and has also played in a band. She used to speak for the NAMI In Our Own Voice program, and ran for City Council of Saint Peter, MN last year.

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© 2016 Jill Niebuhr. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 06/16/2016

ISBN: 978-1-5246-1422-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5246-1421-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016909721

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Contents

ON THE EDGE - HAIKU

Who are you?

She’s Out of Control

Power

Treatment

Crazy Michael

Losing my Keys

Smile

Numbers

Schadenfreude

Happiness

Knowledge

INSIGHT INTO MY ILLNESS AND OTHER THINGS IN LIFE

God

Tremble

One day

Now

PTSD

What we feed

Untitled

The Mighty

Fiesty Creator

La-la-la Lilac

Living at the Library

Guiding Light

Here Is Not There

Writing, Writing

Hating

Give Me More

Nightfall

Wake.

Aids

Alarm Clock

Disrupted

Nowhere

Boy

To Believe Is Naïve

In Light

Screen Saver

Space

Out of Minnesota

The Power

In Front of Me

Watch Me Fail

PRESIDENT

Music In The Air

My Pen

COMMAND CENTER

Freedom

Living on the Edge

To Be Young and Free

Nice Girl

My Water

Old Ways

The Pleasure Principle

Victory

Daredevil

Unforbidden

Confusion

Fire of My Fury

I can pretend to love myself

Stuck

Appeal to the rhythm

Two

Death Becomes Her

The Witch

Guilty

Trail of Years

Hunger and Thirst

I Am A Woman

I Am Heart

Half and half

Darkness

Senseless Sleep

Despondency of Miracles

What’s Always Hot

The Artist’s Journey

Feels Good to Cry

Gone

Sober Woman

True Intent

Die Away

Amen

When Death is a Blessing

The ZZZs

I.d.

Envious Seas of Emotion

I have to hide

Attendance

I ain’t the President

It’s Too Late To Care

Just Another Broken Promise

IN MEMORIUM

American-made

Show Me the Way

A Granddaughter’s Love

Secrets

I didn’t shout

Pride

Belonging

Not the Fight

September 30, 2006

T.A.

Don’t Take My Boy

She made me feel special

Words Hurt

Coming Clean

Call Him Kind

Not My Fault

Seeds to Swallow

Toes

Easy lies

Stone Season

O Venus

You so blind

The Victim

Set Yourself Apart

Never Come Hither

Loss of a loved one

I take care of myself

Worthlessness

FINDING LOVE

Playground

Pretty Boy

Love Your Life

Feelings

You’re good for me

Lightbulbs

Passionate Times

Love lessons

Soul for a Dollar

What?

I WANT LOVE

Moving too fast

Heart Against Mind

When Love Lasts

Yield

Yesterday

No more

Serenity

The Real Thing

Connection

Eager

Let me down

Layers of love

New Lovin’

The last time:

Merry Go Round

Love or something like it

Living apart

Buck them

Loving

Codependent

Examples Needed

False bravado in the name of Love

Walk Away

Smooth Hustla

When You Go

One

Lover Lover

Ahh That We Are

LOVE

LOVE

About the Author

Dedicated to all the broken hearts

ON THE EDGE - HAIKU

Who are you?

Credibility

Is armor, might, taste, good sight

Please hold on to me

She’s Out of Control

I’m your maniac!

Just another crazy bitch

Yelling at the moon

Power

Fingers on the rock

Shadow pointed, deep edges

For strength to build with

Treatment

Black and hot coffee

Steaming in my Styrofoam

Like an angry boy

Crazy Michael

Crazy Michael stirs

With hundreds of sad stories

Until he will die

Losing my Keys

Going psychotic

Pay the toll and see me pace

Back and forth today

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Smile

Turn those lips around

We don’t want to see you frown

Blessing you and me

Numbers

One vulnerable

Adult makes way to freedom

Receiving his number

Schadenfreude

Watching me fall down

Large crowds hasten to make gay

Of my tragedy

Happiness

My grace, mercy, bliss-

Three elements of hope

To hold tightly to

Knowledge

Reading black writing

Conforming my mind to eyes

Where I see clearly

INSIGHT INTO MY ILLNESS AND OTHER THINGS IN LIFE

God

I seek you with intent

Knowing my ways fall short

Instead of the struggle, I find the light.

Instead of thinking, contemplating, and fearing- I trust.

Oh, with you, I believe.

It’s amazing to see my dreams come true

In alignment with you

I pray

Tremble

My heart aches

Until the pain resides

Tapping on my fears.

You still tell me not to worry.

It makes me tremble.

I follow blindly.

I want to believe.

I let go.

I allow those words to lead.

Faith runs over my feelings.

Fear is funny.

I am not scared.

It was so easy

To give up.

I feel so much better.

Instead of a tremble

Instead of a tear

I have hope

One day

One day,

All I need

Right now

Now

Don’t look back.

Don’t jump forward.

You’ll lose what’s happening

Now.

PTSD

I have nothing to offer

Nothing to say

Everything’s fine

I want to keep it that way

What we feed

I’ve been thinking