The Abc's of Love: 26 Ways to Show God’S Love

By Tim Howard

With the alphabet as their outline, Tim Howard and the pastoral staff of Koinonia Church explore twenty-six aspects of Gods love for us and how we can love others in the way God loves us. From Acceptance to Zeal, each aspect takes you deeper into Gods love for us and provokes you to receive Gods love and love others with His love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Nov 20, 2015
• ISBN: 9781512719673

Tim Howard

Tim Howard and the other pastors and authors collectively bring more than one hundred years of marriage, one hundred years of church ministry, thirty thousand hours of individual and couple counseling, and several postgraduate degrees to the topic of love. Each writer lends their unique voice and perspective to this important subject. Serving together on the staff of Koinonia Church, they seek to model lives of love and care for their families, their church, their community, and for each other.

Book preview

THE

ABC’S

of Love

26 Ways to Show God’s Love

TIM HOWARD

43404.png

Copyright © 2015 Tim Howard.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture quotations taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Bible®,

Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973,

1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation

Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

Scripture quotations taken from the Amplified® Bible,

Copyright © 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation

Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks of Biblica, Inc. Use of either trademark for the offering of goods or services requires the prior written consent of Biblica US, Inc.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

1 [phone]

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5127-1966-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-1968-0 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-1967-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2015918982

WestBow Press rev. date: 11/20/2015

Contents

Dedication

This book is dedicated to the people of Koinonia Church. To those like Beth Wiruth, who sacrificed hours upon hours to see this project become a reality. To those on the Pastoral staff who wrote various chapters and to those who have a passion for God and a compassion for people – so that Christ might be honored.

This book, a gift of love,

is presented to

________________________________

by

________________________________

on the occasion of

________________________________

Date: ____/____/______

Preface

Loving God and loving people are notably the top two commandments in the Bible!

Matt. 22:37-39 reads, Jesus replied: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’"

Every day people say ‘I love you’ to someone. But love is more than words. Love is a decision to act and goes beyond emotions or good intentions. It is practical and can be experienced by those who are the recipients.

God’s love, when practically revealed to others, has the power to influence and change the direction of one’s life in a positive way. The opposite is also true. When a person doesn’t experience genuine love it has negative effects and can cause devastation.

The ABC’s of Love will explore 26 ways to express God’s love with practicality.

From ‘A’ to ‘Z’ this book will give a hands-on guide to those wanting to make a positive difference in the lives of others.

We have all heard the word ‘love’ but few have a full understanding. The writers of this book fall into that group too but because of our personal relationships with Jesus Christ – we are growing in our knowledge and ability to love people God’s way. We haven’t arrived yet because you don’t arrive until you arrive but we are seeking to move in the right direction.

We write this book to share what we have learned and sincerely pray that the "ABC’s of Love (26 Ways to Show God’s Love) will equip you with tools to help you develop a stronger passion for God and be better equipped to show His compassion for people in realistic ways.

Tim Howard, Lead Pastor

Koinonia Church

Hanford, CA

Love your neighbor as yourself.

-Jesus

(Mark 12:31)

A – Acceptance

Tim Howard

"Accept one another then just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.¹"

Do you remember the television sitcom called Cheers that premiered on September 30,1982? The series lasted through 1993 and the show’s main theme song, written and performed by Gary Portnoy conveyed a person’s desire to find a place where he or she would be accepted and appreciated.

I believe this desire resides within all of us – After all, who wants to experience rejection!

I know what it’s like to be rejected and maybe you do as well! That’s possibly the reason behind why I believe acceptance is the number one priority when seeking to grow a strong relationship based upon true love. It’s talked about in this chapter not merely because it begins with the first letter of the alphabet but because it is the foundation upon which relationships are built. When you have encountered rejection you can greatly appreciate the joy and peace you experience when someone offers genuine acceptance. You may not be able to articulate it but you sure can feel it!

It’s wonderful to find a place where people know your name and they’re always glad when you come.

Rejection is real! In the early years of life children can experience emotional wounds that penetrate deeply into the soul. To know you are excluded – on the outside looking in or undesirable because you don’t meet someone’s requirements is painful – it hurts deeply!

Rejection can cause wounds that last a lifetime if not healed properly. As a Pastor for over 4 decades I’ve seen many people struggle with close and intimate relationships – not knowing the core of their struggle was linked to unhealed hurts.

Rejection is like pushing someone. If you push someone physically, they move away from you – there is a distance between you and them.

I have never witnessed anyone pushed physically – ending up closer to his or her opponent. The results are exactly the same emotionally. When someone is pushed away because of non-acceptance they move further away and the distance grows wider and wider.

To grow healthy relationships you must close the gap. Emotional distance will dilute the ability to love the way God has created us to love. Acceptance closes the gap created by rejection!

Rejection makes it possible to appreciate acceptance on a greater level.

I’m not talking from some textbook on this subject. I, like some of you, have personally suffered rejection on some level. In grammar school I had psoriasis all over my body. Psoriasis is a skin disorder that can be unsightly. I could cover up most of the unsightly spots with certain types of clothes but those on the face were visible to all.

Being viewed as ‘different – odd – weird – unsightly’ led to many years of hiding, aloneness, solitude, desperation and my first taste of rejection. In those early years a faulty belief system began to grow and unwittingly, I embraced it as truth. It wasn’t until my adult years that I recognized it as a lie and began to replace it with truth. This wouldn’t have been possible without the help of Christ and good counsel.

This faulty belief system goes far beyond the physical realm. Wrong beliefs will affect a person’s psyche and influence the decisions they make. Even as people try to hide physical blemishes from the view of people – they all too often try to hide their ‘real self.’ The results are seen in a false portrait of themselves to others.

Acceptance is only as good as the foundation it is built upon. If a person accepts another because of his or her projected wealth – the foundation is cracked. Some are accepted because of their position, their power or their prominence. When acceptance is offered to the ‘pretend you’ it is not real. Acceptance is only true when it embraces and accepts the authentic you!

People are ok but I’m not ok! Something’s wrong with me so I must hide what’s wrong! I am unacceptable so I must pretend to be someone else and live vicariously through them! That was the lie I believed to be true. When these beliefs are accepted as truth we begin to live a hypocritical life and put on the face of an actor. In the Oxford Dictionary an actor is defined as: a person who behaves in a way that is not genuine.

God’s love for us is based upon authenticity! He knows all the good and bad we have done. He knows when we have been weak and strong and when we have rebelled and obeyed. He sees everything but His love looks beyond our faults and loves who we are – warts and all! … That’s acceptance!

I wish I had accepted my wife during the early years of our marriage in the same way God accepts me. If I had she would have enjoyed life and health on a greater level.

My marriage struggled greatly in the first decade because I practiced non-acceptance and wasn’t content with the authentic woman God had so graciously given me. It wasn’t her problem but mine… Had I seen this revelation back then, I could have changed things. But when you are trying to make someone into what you want him or her to be rather than accepting who they are – you are blinded to the truth.

That’s what non-acceptance does. It puts pressure on people to change in some way. Nothing is good enough unless it meets one’s standards. It refuses to let people be who they are at any given moment and demands some kind of alteration. It says I love you when… I love you if… I love you because – Acceptance says: I love you – without adding any stipulations.

Acceptance creates an atmosphere conducive to sharing. In that environment one feels free to let their hair down – so to speak – and share vulnerably. We all have a public life, a private life and a personal life. The public sees a part of us, those we meet in private also see a dimension but no one sees your personal life unless you open the doors. Without acceptance, the doors in all likelihood