Expectation Therapy: Mastering Your Expectations

By Art Costello

What if you could revolutionize your life from top to bottom by altering your mindset in just one way?

Art costello has the answer and it's quite simple: mastering your expectations. Through improved understanding of expectations and their bearing on every facte of life, you can expect:

-increased creativity and productivity

-boosted confidence

-improved human interaction

-the ability to steer the course of your future!

Costello speaks conversationally and candidly about his own experiences and how they inspired him to pioneer the original concepts in this book. He explains that expectations are not just a word, but a framework for living. When you operate through faith and not fear, you create higher expectations and create self-fulfilling prophesies for the life you have always wanted. It's simple but life changing!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: Jun 14, 2016
• ISBN: 9781504355520

Art Costello

Art is a visionary mindset expert who shows you how to recognize the connection between your expectations and achievements. He clearly identifies the opportunity for you to shed your limiting beliefs and become more prepared, and more successful, allowing you to lead a more joyful life. Art has the unique ability to identify what is preventing you from living to your full potential and gives you options.

Book preview

Copyright © 2014, 2016 Art Costello.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

ISBN: 978-1-5043-5550-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-5551-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5043-5552-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016908443

Balboa Press rev. date: 06/10/2016

CONTENTS

Preface

Introduction: Expectations (The Origins of Success)

A Personal Mission and the Foundations of High Achievement

Chapter 1: Expectations and Personal Growth

Learning to Harness Adversity for the Better

Lessons from the Frontlines of Life and Vietnam

The Most Important Lesson: Helping Others

What What Ifs Mean for You

In Retrospect: The Importance of Each Moment

Chapter 2: What Are Expectations?

Faithful versus Fearful Expectations

More on Faith: Why It Is Essential

Maintain an Open Mind in Your Faith

The Importance of Creativity

Expectations as a Principle and Theory

Chapter 3: Emotional Intelligence

A History of Emotional Intelligence

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence

Factors That Affect Emotional Intelligence

Is Emotional Intelligence More Important Than Intelligence Quotient?

Do Women Have a Greater Emotional Intelligence Than Men?

Utilizing Emotional Intelligence and Expectations to Get Results

Chapter 4: Harnessing Expectations and Creating Passion

Passion versus Motivation

Finding Passion in the Mundane

The Many Explanations for Motivation

The Hierarchy of Needs

Collective Diminished Expectations

Don't Abandon Expectations---Expect the Unexpected!

What Do Prayer, Meditation, and Expectations Have in Common?

Chapter 5: Setting the Most Important Expectations: Self-Expectations!

Consciousness, Intelligence, Self-Awareness, and Effort

Don't Hesitate to Toss Aside Hesitation

The Hexagon of Expectations

Chapter 6: Expectations and Others

Social Roles and Collective Diminished Expectations

My Suggestion on the Power of Suggestion

Tips for Breaking Away from Negative People

Attachment, Relationships, and Bonding

How to Communicate Expectations

Conclusion

Postscript

What a Bountiful Vision

Preview: Quantum Expectations

References and Works Cited

PREFACE

Life has taught me that people are born to succeed. Struggles, adversity, and setbacks are inevitable; indeed, they are frequently the stepping stones to great achievement. But I'm convinced that every individual---and that includes you---carries within the seed potential of high performance and personal excellence.

I believe each and every person is meant to flourish. My perspective owes much to the school of hard knocks. No matter what challenges I faced, though, I've found that faith, high expectations, and fortitude can see you through to a higher station on your journey. I've experienced firsthand that reality can treat you pretty rough. I'm here to tell you that if you have the belief to hang in there, then you will eventually discover a hard-won wisdom that is even tougher.

I've been a marine in Vietnam, semipro baseball player, business owner, music manager, counselor, husband, and father. These roles have shaped my outlook and convictions. My views have also been informed by decades of academic research, psychological studies, and my experience working with the world-renowned psychiatrist Dr. Stuart Brown, one of the foremost experts on the importance of play in our lives.

I've also become a keen student of quantum mechanics, the branch of science that deals with the mysterious properties of matter at the subatomic level. The implications of this exciting discipline are astonishing; they have called into question any reductionist or materialistic account of our universe. In fact, in this field, science and spirituality are converging. The findings suggest that thought patterns play a role in shaping physical outcomes.

The full repercussions of quantum theory are unknown at present, but my outlook that humans are purposeful creatures---and are inherently designed and equipped to exercise an innate freedom and creativity in the quest to flourish---finds expression in the human treasure trove of Western philosophy, Eastern wisdom, science, and most especially humanity's religious traditions. Therefore, in reaching my conclusions I have drawn from diverse perspectives that include my Christian faith, the teachings of Zen Buddhism, and the latest psychological findings on the topic of human potential.

My personal experiences, academic studies, and professional life have led to my core belief that high expectations are the key to success. But the opportunity to coach, mentor, and work with many people from all walks of life---and to share with them the knowledge that consciously changing their expectations in a disciplined way can transform their lives for the better---has provided the real-life proof that this technique works.

Mastering your expectations is probably the most important step you can take toward unlocking your potential. This book is intended as a guide to the principles, habits of mind, and wisdom that I believe will help you achieve your aims and the personal excellence that is your birthright. I'm absolutely certain that if you expect the very best of yourself, then you will begin to discover the courage, creativity, and strength to reach your goals.

Best wishes on your journey.

Art Costello

INTRODUCTION

Expectations (The Origins of Success)

A Personal Mission and the Foundations of High Achievement

Diminished expectations are like a sword to the heart----- Art Costello

High expectations are the key to unlocking your potential. The idea that lofty aspirations can define who you become is inspiring, humbling, and empowering at the same time. What ambitious goal or worthy cause fills you with enthusiasm? How can you harness your passions and tap great reservoirs of creativity and fortitude in order to achieve your aims? Expectation Therapy is an examination of the psychological principles and habits of mind that fuel success. Are you ready to start making your dreams come true?

Expectation is far more than a word. It is more than a concept or an idea. It is more than an imagined outcome for yourself or for someone else. It is more than a motivating goal. It is more than a desired end state that pulls you forward.

So, what is an expectation? It is the basic root from which we grow. Expectation provides a framework that infuses your life with meaning, purpose, and passion. It is the seed of success. High self-expectations determine the breadth of your dreams and the heights of your achievements.

Expectation transcends gender, religion, economic class, and physical abilities. You have the power to set high expectations. Doing so helps you blossom as a person.

Expectations can be either your best ally or your staunchest foe. If you diminish or destroy someone's expectations, then you undermine the person's potential. If you accept lowered expectations for yourself, then soon there is no higher goal or purpose, and consequently imagination and hope wither. You must water your life with high self-expectations so that creativity can flourish. Then you can dream big and accomplish great things.

The expectation therapy model I have developed has been crafted to help individuals, families, communities, and societies thrive. It is a framework that encompasses a mindset, a disciplined approach to harnessing psychological habits, practical tips for transforming them into daily physical actions, and a set of techniques for creating the positive outlook people need to succeed. This method is a byproduct of my personal life, years of academic study, my decades-long experience as a counselor, and my collaboration with leading practitioners in the human potential field. Increasingly, the psychological literature and the latest studies recognize the importance of expectations in shaping life outcomes. My technique builds on this growing body of work while distilling cutting-edge research into practical insights that improve lives.

When both the significance and the effectiveness of expectation therapy are understood, then you will be able to harness expectations to better yourself in the workplace, in education, and in every aspect of life. With improved expectations, you can create the foundations for success. Expecting the best creates a psychological environment where anything is possible. When you believe the sky's the limit, then you can tackle challenges and the world with a renewed sense of confidence. Most important, remember that your expectations are uniquely yours. They contain tremendous power because they come from deep within the core of your being.

I'm convinced that you have the innate potential to succeed beyond your dreams. Sharing my story and how positive expectations have shaped my life for the better will help to illustrate how you can apply these same principles and techniques to further your unique aspirations.

In the following chapter, I'll recount my quest, which will help demonstrate how I came to appreciate the importance of expectations, clarify them, and then tap them as a springboard for greater achievement. I believe the process I went through provides a template through which you can begin to discern your core values and sculpt your own high expectations.

CHAPTER 1

Expectations and Personal Growth

Learning to Harness Adversity for the Better

The first step in the expectation therapy model is to identify and clarify your core expectations. This stage frequently involves soul searching and introspection. It is a phase many of us naturally go through as adolescents, but this reflective process can occur at any age. As I recount my journey, think about how similar formative experiences may have shaped your expectations. Also, ponder the expectations that excite your passion and stir your spirit in