Sexually Driven: One Church Girl's Struggle with Sexual Addiction and a Desire to Be Loved

By Queen Esther Lacey

Regina Star is a God-fearing Christian that just got caught up in a lifetime of hurts because of her twisted view of lovefrom man to man and from bed to bed. She was never content, always revisiting hurts and becoming more and more damaged. Her view on life was becoming darker, more and more cloudy. As you turn the pages and listen to her tell her life story, you cant help but feel the pain of emptiness she must have felt day in and day out.

Is there hope past the bed covers for Regina?

Dont judge, but try to understand. Try to see Reginas choices from the point of view of a woman that has only known love as a touch in all the wrong places even as a little girl growing up. Try to see from the perspective of every time a man tells her he loves her, its only because he wants to get her in bed. Actually, when real love did try to show up (from her husband), she was so damaged she didnt recognize it and feared it and, therefore, fought and rejected it. Try to imagine never receiving anything positive being poured into your life, and that you have never received a safe and loving hug. She became so withdrawn that her view on sex was not like that of the average woman. She loved the fantasy (the very thought) of sex, but once she allowed you to taste of her sweet nectar, she no longer wanted anything to do with you.

My friends, dont judge Regina. Just take the journey, and look into her heart. Then if you see Regina or anyone that looks like Regina, have compassion on her.

Although this book may have been found on the shelf with the fictional books, Reginas story is very real!

This book is for adults only. It is not intended for anyone under the age of eighteen.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jan 14, 2015
• ISBN: 9781496963307

Queen Esther Lacey

Author Queen Esther Lacey – Christian writer, Naïve New Yorker. Loves the Lord and His people. Contact info – [e-mail] Photo by – Crescent Reflections Photography

Book preview

Sexually

DRIVEN

One Church Girl’s Struggle with

Sexual Addiction and a Desire to Be Loved

Queen Esther Lacey

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© 2015 Queen Esther Lacey. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse   01/09/2015

ISBN: 978-1-4969-6331-4 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4969-6330-7 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Foreword/Review

Dedication

Chapter 1   Mentally Sound

Chapter 2   The Proverbs 7 Woman

Chapter 3   Hiding Behind The Bible

Chapter 4   Once Exposed

Chapter 5   Name In Lights

Chapter 6   Without My Permission

Chapter 7   Rock Bottom

Chapter 8   It’s A Process

A Personal Note From The Author

INTRODUCTION

In talking to several (God fearing – God loving – God serving) women, there was one subject that kept coming up. Sex! There was one woman in particular that really caught my attention and I thought I would focus on her story. The young lady’s name is Regina Star. An average looking African American, medium height, full figured, single woman of God that was searching for her place in ministry. She was brought up in a family that went to church all the time. In fact, when they went on summer vacations going to church was apart of it. Regina gave her life to the Lord at age 9. She runs her own businesses. In fact, she has several successful chains of hair salons throughout the country called A Healing Touch.

On the outside looking at Regina was no different than any other woman. There was nothing about her that would make you take a double look and there was nothing about her that would make you question her character or her love for the Lord. She appeared quite ordinary.

However, there was something different about Regina. Regina had a tormenting double life. Don’t get me wrong, she loved the Lord with her very being. This torment that was causing her to live a double life was beyond her control. She wasn’t sure what the root of the problem was. She didn’t know if it was a chemical imbalance in her brain or if it was a lusting spiritual warfare. Maybe it was because of the missing presence of a father growing up or just a cocktail of everything all mixed up. She just never thought about how it was destroying her life until she came across this pastor who introduces her to the thought of a personal relationship with God. Having a relationship with God verses religion was not new to her, but the intimacy part was totally foreign.

She wanted it! She wanted it so much that she started seeking after it. In order to get this intimacy with God, it was going to take Regina facing who she really was. Those deep down hidden tormenting desires that drove her to her double life were going to have to be dealt with. Regina was no longer going to be able to live in denial.

She would have to face her sexual demons!!!

I felt a burning need to tell Regina’s story because I know she can’t be the only one out there. She needs to know that she isn’t the only one on that dark journey so that she can come to terms with she’s not alone. Especially that young lady who thinks she can’t have a relationship with God because of her life style or her past. No one can judge, we all came from something and some of us are still striving to hold on, looking