Recipes to Drive Your Life: Take Control and Steer It Your Way

By Edward Leon Anderson

Life is not preprogrammed. Each day, we are faced with choices that guide us in one direction or the other. As a result, we are all fully capable of choosing the path we desire. In Recipes to Drive Your Life, Ed Anderson provides the principles, tools, and concepts to help others find a more meaningful life filled with peace, purpose, and happiness.

Anderson relies on his personal and professional experiences to share a proven process and insights that will clarify thinking, answer questions, and lead others on a personal growth journey to make better choices in life. Through thought-providing questions and step-by-step guidance, Anderson encourages individuals to look inward to discover interests and strengths, practice gratitude and healing, take risks, and become open to new possibilities. Included are summaries at the end of each chapter that highlight important takeaways from each learning lesson.

Recipes to Drive Your Life is a self-help guidebook that shares time-tested principles, practical advice, and inspiration for anyone interested in forging a new path to success, fulfillment, and contentment.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Nov 7, 2014
• ISBN: 9781496947758

Edward Leon Anderson

Ed Anderson earned a degree in Electrical Engineering from Villanova University. His career took him from the United States Navy Civil Engineer Corps to Procter and Gamble where he worked for over thirty-seven years. He and his wife, Jane, have three children, four grandchildren, and live in Cincinnati, Ohio.

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© 2014 Edward Leon Anderson. All rights reserved.

Art Credit: Title page Avery Liell-Kok

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 11/05/2014

ISBN: 978-1-4969-4776-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4969-4775-8 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014918913

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1 What is Life?

Chapter 2 The Foundation and Framework

Chapter 3 You as a Person

Chapter 4 Learning

Chapter 5 Understand and Take Care of Yourself

Chapter 6 Live in the Present

Chapter 7 Lucky Days: Practical Principles for Living

Chapter 8 Decision Making

Chapter 9 Appreciate Those Who Help You; The Parachute Story

Chapter 10 Understand the Pain and Change

Chapter 11 Love is Wonderful

Chapter 12 Purpose, Vision, Plans, and Tracking

Chapter 13 Add Spices to Everyday Life

Chapter 14 Threes Make the Difference

Chapter 15 The Path Forward from Here

This book is dedicated to my wife, Jane, and our three children, Karen, Bob, and Tricia, who shared my journey and helped me see, learn, live, enjoy, and achieve. Because of you, I am who I am. Thank you!

INTRODUCTION

Living is a daily process for each of us. We experience the daily grind and behave in ways that are comfortable. We choose these actions and behaviors, whether pleasant or unpleasant, for many reasons, and often we make these choices subconsciously. We are very intelligent, but our daily lives seem more programmed by many factors outside our control than factors we choose by our free will for the path we desire. We often feel like victims, trapped in our current situations and the circumstances around us. Consider that each of us really does have free will to make the decisions that will make our lives be what we choose. Life is not preprogrammed. We are fully capable of choosing the path that we desire. This book provides the principles, guides, tools, and concepts to help you improve your personal process to both understand and follow the life path that you choose. You will find here the recipes that you can select each day to drive a life that will be more meaningful for you. It is only by doing this with courage and a thoughtful approach each day that we can really find peace, purpose, and happiness.

This book contains a process for choosing the life that you want for yourself. By applying the elements of this process at a pace that is comfortable for where you are in your life, you will be giving yourself the opportunity to grow and develop. Each chapter provides insights that can be used collectively or individually to help clarify your thinking and to guide you. The book can be used in total or in parts based on where you currently are on your life journey and what needs you may have. Use of the principles will lead to your personal success and improvement. The ideas in the book can also be guides, recipes, or references for specific situations that you face.

Life is happening. Each day that we live we have options. We have the opportunity to make the choices that will guide our individual paths and will make the day be the right next step in the life which we want and have chosen. Interestingly, by taking the daily steps and making better choices, we experience a life that feels better, because it is better. This book provides the process and recipes for anyone really interested in understanding and making the choices to have the life that he or she desires. Things happen. That is normal and a reality of our existence. However, by seeing, knowing, and understanding, you can improve your capability, make good choices, and as a result, enjoy a better life. If you know what you need and what you can do, you can build your skills to make a difference for yourself. I would suggest reading the book in segments. After each segment, give yourself some personal time to more completely digest the concepts and thoughts, and to reflect on your own situation. Many find it helpful to also use this material as a guide during an annual retreat to refresh and to renew. Things change, and you need to adjust and change as you go through life. Change is the everlasting opportunity to improve and make real progress in your life. Being able to effectively steer your life through the flow of life’s everyday events so that you are aided by life’s currents and not just pushed around by them is critical to living well. Take the time to take care of you and choose your course!

CHAPTER ONE

WHAT IS LIFE?

We each exist. We are human. We are intelligent and have a free will to make decisions. We communicate with others in many different ways. We each have a purpose and a role in this life. However, it often seems as if we are going through the motions of living—or maybe just surviving—and doing what we think we should be doing rather than choosing what we want to do and then making life happen the way we desire.

First, consider what life is for you. Think about what life really is and why you exist. Life is the state of being alive! It is not just going through daily rituals. It is experiencing the ongoing opportunities that are made available to you, and using these opportunities as the launching pad for propelling and enriching you. Yes, propelling and enriching your very being! Life is more than existing and getting through the daily grind. It is using your skills, talents, and understanding to enhance your daily process and making choices that best achieve the outcomes that you seek. This process also enriches the lives of those you touch.

Life is the road that each of us is traveling along as we go through each day. Over the course of each day, we are provided with many opportunities to make decisions and choices. We can be on cruise control and just sit back and let life happen. We can observe the many turns in the road and learn from the bumps and obstacles that are present. We can make choices about which path or road to be on and decide when we want to choose a different path or take a turn. We encounter many crossroads and detours as we go, and we can decide when the time is right to take advantage of any of these options too.

Take time to notice and enjoy the beauty all around us as you travel your life path. We can even decide the speed we travel. We have the opportunity to decide whom we travel the road with and whom else we invite along on our travels. There will be individuals who will ride with us for a long time and there will be others who will part way and leave us, often way before we want them to. The people we meet and interact with as we take our journey offer the most compelling way to influence our own thoughts, direction, and feelings. Yes, your parents were right! Your friends and those people with whom you hang out do make a big difference in you and who you are, and how you feel about life. And the road we travel always presents unexpected events for us to consider and different kinds of needs that we must address.

And there are consequences to the choices that we make. What is really interesting is that there are also consequences to the choices that we avoid or do not make. The consequences are part of what we always experience as we travel through life. There are also stops that are required on the road of life. Sometimes we select these stops, and other times they are given to us. For example, we might have a layover at the hospital or some other unwanted and unexpected stops. But life is not a game. We do not get any do-overs. We cannot go in reverse. We need to face the issues and needs that are presented to us, learn from them, and then decide the next steps that we will take to make progress on our journey. We also need to accept the consequences or outcomes of our choices or our failure to choose. We achieve progress when we focus on the most important needs and then take steps. It is through action that we discover solutions, and success is best accomplished. I find it so interesting that the stops that we face are often the best opportunities for learning and growing. But it is never easy. And many will suggest that you need a grand plan to know where you are going and to be able to best leverage opportunities and changes as you go. This certainly helps, but the critical point is to keep taking steps and making choices.

Yes, friends really do influence each of us. Know that these traveling companions have a significant influence on you and how you think. Sometimes you unintentionally acquire concepts, thoughts, frameworks, principles, traits, and habits from these friends without even realizing that this is happening. Other times your behaviors reflect things that you want to avoid because you see it in them and know the pain or hurt that it can create. These fellow travelers are not along for the ride; rather, they are there to help you learn and develop to be a more effective you. Remember this as you experience pain or hardship on your journey.

As we travel this road called life, we are presented with many opportunities that can help improve our trip. Probably the most significant opportunity is the opportunity to be aware and to carefully take in the experiences that are presented to us along the way. We can always gain new insights, at the very least, from these experiences. Often they provide the opportunity for significant learning and growth. Learn to be aware. See what is happening and what is around you. This is a key element of leading your life well. So many people are so busy getting it done, whatever it may be, that they are unable to see and be aware of what is happening, what is around them, and what they are doing, but most importantly why they are doing it. Awareness is the greatest gift that we have, and it is also the fundamental principle to understanding and leading your life in the way you want it.

Being impulsive is both interesting and exhilarating. However, it is not healthy or even appropriate to be impulsive all of the time. Being impulsive can be good occasionally for helping you step out of your routine, but slow down and smell the roses as the saying goes. What does this mean? It means that your norm should be to take life a step at a time and carefully see what is around you and what is happening as you take the next step. If you make this thoughtful and paced approach your normal process, you will not miss steps or make mistakes that will cause you pain. Doing things too quickly will generate mistakes, incidents, and accidents. That is a reality! Speed often leads to detours that take you off course and cause you problems and headaches that must be addressed. Take the time you need to do things right with your full awareness and attention, because this will, in the end, minimize the time you need to achieve maximum good results from your actions.

Life is being alive, and the richness of being alive means that we can improve, grow, and develop. We can be better than we are! This opportunity to improve exists and is given to each of us on a daily basis so that we can learn and then apply what we’ve learned as we endeavor to best design our individual happiness. Often we receive opportunities many times a day. Only a fool would not take advantage of these opportunities to be a better person in ways that we individually choose based on the experiences that we have every day and the course that we want to travel.

There are requirements at each stage in your life that you must accommodate. Some call these givens, meaning that they are important and need to be addressed and adhered to as you travel through a specific stage of your life. In these stages, you do not have total freedom to choose and decide. Better said, there are things in your life at every stage that impact you and impact others, and you must navigate your course by including them in your decisions and choices. These are constraints that you must consider and manage. Know that these exist to help guide your progress and your course. Think about them as protectors or enablers that can help direct and channel your decisions. When you were a child, your parents established many parameters intended to steer your learning and to protect you. For example, we were admonished not to touch the hot stove. We were instructed to attend class every day, and do our homework and chores. Perhaps our parents reviewed our homework with us and talked about our day at school to raise awareness and to reinforce our learning. During the summer, our parents may have encouraged us to spend time each day reading a book to keep us engaged in continuing to learn. These experiences and requirements help children learn good processes and build the capability to make the right choices as children, and even better choices later in their lives. Parents have the responsibility to help their children and to establish reasonable requirements that are meaningful and necessary. It is so interesting that having children sets in motion a unique set of requirements for the parent. The well-being of their children, in addition to their development, is a critical ongoing requirement. It is the parents’ most significant requirement and responsibility!

Clearly at each stage of our lives we are faced with requirements and givens. These can limit the options for choice in our decisions, but there is still room for choice within the requirements and givens that exist. And it is very important to understand the requirements at any stage of your life so that you are aware, thoughtful, and make appropriate choices as you take