Between the Lines

By Emmanuel Thomas

The book contains essays on simple but perplexing questions that we come across as we go about living our lives. How do we react to a situation when we fail to practice what we preach? Why do we occasionally feel joy in the misfortune of others and then feel guilty about it? Is religion a difficult proposition in the modern world? We are shaken when heroes worshipped by many as role models get convicted on crimes done in secret. The book makes an attempt to search for answers to such questions by going through authoritative sources of research done by eminent scholars with the intention to disseminate such thoughts to those who are assailed by similar questions and help them to come to their own conclusions. The book has parts consisting of musings, reminiscences, satire, and short stories conveying messages that are considered important as we face problems in our daily existence.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing India
• Release date: Dec 4, 2015
• ISBN: 9781482858815

Emmanuel Thomas

Emmanuel Thomas is an engineer and a management consultant. He was born in the state of Kerala, India. He had his school and college education in Kerala. Later, he spent three years in the USA, studying and working. After a successful career in the industry, he founded a company to manufacture batteries to power lamps for coal mines and Indian railways. He spends his time in the city of Chennai in the southern part of India with his wife Susan, reading and writing, and advising small and medium size companies on better management practices. Occasionally they visit the US to spend summer months with their grandchildren.

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BETWEENTHE

LINES

EMMANUEL THOMAS

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Copyright © 2015 by Emmanuel Thomas.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

www.partridgepublishing.com/india

CONTENTS

Foreword

Acknowledgements

Preface

Invocation

Part 1

MUSINGS

Introduction

1. Challenges of Today

2. The Price and Prize of Praise

3. Walk the Talk

4. The Agony and Ecstasy of Problems

5. City of Broken Windows

6. A Tide in Our Affairs

7. The Business of Innovation

8. In Search of Role Models

9. Food, Fun, and Fellowship

10. Small Matters

11. The Power of Optimism

12. The Practice of Religion

13. In Search of a Value System

14. Numbness of the Mind

15. Coping with Stress

16. Comfort Zone

17. Colour of Money

18. Seeds of Love

19. Ethical Business

20. Sight Without Vision

21. Blessings of Health

22. A Beautiful Mind in a Beautiful Body

23. Poetic Beauty and Romance

24. Facets of Charity

25. Entertainment for the Soul

26. Thoughts on Fasting

27. Power of the Word

28. The World of Youth

29. Ties of Friendship

30. The Elixir of Life

31. Woman Power

32. The Successful and the Unsuccessful

33. Our Daily Bread

34. A Noble Person

35. A Life Without Soul

36. Pride and Punishment

37. The Art of Wisdom

38. Divine Calls

39. Simplicity of Mind

40. The Best and the Brightest

41. A Graceful Exit

42. The Soul of a Terrorist

43. Deprivation Syndrome

44. The Sweetness of Freedom

45. Ideas and Ideals

46. The Message of Education

47. Deals within Raw Deals

48. The Vulture in the Work Culture

49. The Balance in Life

50. Inspiration

Part 2

REMINISCENCES

INTRODUCTION

1. A Letter to Children

2. Twilight Years

3. Poverty in Affluence

4. The Mind Is a Monkey

5. Victory in Magnanimity

6. The Message from a Dream

7. Of Human Relationships

8. Joys of Children

9. Memories of Indian Summer and Monsoon Rains

Part 3

SATIRE

Introduction

1. Sense of Humour

2. Bringing Up Grandfather

3. The Whole Truth of Nothing but the Tooth

4. A Simulated Death Experience

5. Of Moustaches and Men

6. Chain of Chain of Thoughts

7. The Story of a Funeral

References

DEDICATION

It is with pleasure that I dedicate this book to my wife and life partner who patiently took care of me over countless years and, at the same time, carefully edited the pages of my life with love and care.

This book is also dedicated to my father who introduced me to the words of eminent figures of world literature, to the magical and surreal universe of eternal fictional characters, and to the thoughts and deeds of some of the greatest political figures of the twentieth century.

FOREWORD

Emmanuel Thomas is an engineer by qualification, was an executive by profession, but his heart is in the humanities. His family and mine have been friends for half a century, so much so that his wife, Susan, thinks of me as her Tamil brother. Besides, Thomas and I had been colleagues in the workplace for four decades. Over the years, I became aware of his deep insights into the human mind and behaviour.

His father was an ethical, principled man. However, he had a rigid outlook, a leaning towards sociological conservatism, and had an authoritarian tendency. While imbibing the good qualities of his father, even at a young age, he decided to have an open enquiring mind, took a sociologically liberal stance, and above all, shunned authoritarianism at home and even in the work place. He decided not to impose his will upon his children but decided to be a mentor – an elder statesman, if you will – to them. He was not an instructor but a guide to his children and shared his musings with them. His verbal and written musings and acute observations have become a part of this book.

As colleagues, Thomas and I had many occasions to travel together extensively by land and air. During such times, I thoroughly enjoyed listening to his observations on the human condition. He looked at a wide range of human activities, attitudes, values, emotions, and behaviours with amazement and often with amusement. Many years later, his son Rajesh, sent an e-mail to his parents about our families’ get-togethers during his formative years. He wrote how he enjoyed the prevailing humour and ‘the wonderful intellectual conversations’ during our social meetings.

Thomas is a voracious reader. His preference is for thought-provoking books. He refined his thoughts with the writings of other insightful people. In this book, Thomas covers a staggering range of aspects relating to the human condition. He has enriched his writings here with relevant quotes and references from great writers, achievers, and philosophers.

I give below just a few lines taken randomly from this book which I enjoyed.

‘I note with dismay that the youth worship movie stars and sports heroes and not a Gandhi or a Mandela.’

‘Our youth are not prepared to drop out of an elite institution to throw themselves into unknown waters to follow their dreams. There will be formidable parental, peer, and social pressures to prevent them from pursuing such a course, even if they are willing and inclined to take a path less travelled. A brilliant engineer finally goes on to become a part player or even an outstanding one to build someone else’s dream.’

‘The attempt here is to examine whether the best and the brightest are a bane or a boon in our own daily struggles. Many of them carry with them seeds of their own destruction, and unfortunately, their swagger leads to the destruction of others too.’

‘The fundamental blind spot of such individuals is the lack of wisdom and humility. Many global disasters and wars were brought about by their hubris and absolute belief in the certainty of the success of their decisions.’

This book is all about one man’s musings, his amusing anecdotes, his cherished memories and his analysis of a wide spectrum of human behaviour backed by thoughts and deeds of some of the truly great ones. The reader would find the book immensely enjoyable and obtain deep insights into life itself in all its varied forms.

Manohar Devadoss

(Manohar is an artist, scientist, author, a great conversationalist and a well-known personality in the social and intellectual circles of the city of Chennai, India. I am grateful to him for agreeing to write the foreword.)

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I have to admit that this book is the result of a family enterprise. My immediate and extended family suggested that I put down on paper the random thoughts and musings which I enjoyed sharing with them from time to time.

The family contributed substantially with opinions, suggestions, and editing. The early manuscript was read by my wife, Susan, who encouraged me with her views. My firstborn, Rajesh and his wife, Preethy, did the first round of reading and consolidated the essays into a proper format. Ramya, my daughter spent considerable time with me at home sacrificing her well-earned vacation away from her work in the UK to undertake a thorough editing. My second son, Renji, gave occasional feedback and opinion while his better half, Priya burned considerable mid night oil by reading through the whole manuscript to make valuable suggestions. My brother–in-law, Rev. Dr. Mathew Moolel S.J. was a great supporter who patiently went through the rough manuscript.

I acknowledge with thanks the encouragement that I received from my extended family, seniors and juniors, nephews and nieces of the generation next, too many to be named here. I presume that I have to be thankful to the great minds whose opinions and quotes helped me to find new meanings in my own views and thoughts.

PREFACE

This book is an anthology of essays. I wrote these over a period of many years as letters of advice to my children, reflections e-mailed to the family group, and thought-provoking editorials in the Rotary Club magazine, Westerly as its one-time editor. I have attempted to peep through the frailties of human nature through thoughtful musings, personal reminiscences, flights of fantasy, satirical comments, and short stories. Although they are grouped under different chapters for uniformity of thoughts, all convey messages of values according to my own interpretation and introspection on matters of certain relevance and importance to our lives. I have to make clear that the opinions expressed here are my own and I do not expect my readers to agree with them. A chapter is included titled ‘Inspiration’ in order to inspire, trigger, and create a touch of excitement in our lives. Some of the greatest speeches ever made, the most enlightening messages ever delivered, and most magnificent words ever written which inspired and continue to inspire and awaken the unexplored inner recesses of my mind have been presented there in. I have read many books and writings to refine my views on the subjects of this enquiry. A list of those books and articles is attached as an appendix. The readers may refer to them if they are inclined for a deeper understanding of matters discussed in these pages as I have scratched only the surface of issues that are considered important and critical in these times.

Writing these essays created an internal energy. I could get insight into many facets of life and thoughts. It was interesting to learn that Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533–1592), an influential writer of the French Renaissance, was known for popularising the essay as a literary genre. I have taken the liberty of quoting from the famous as well as anonymous sources depending on the appropriateness and relevance of the quotes to the context and the content of the musings. It is amusing to note the aphorism that for an uneducated man, it is a good pastime to read a book of quotations. Nevertheless, I believe that the quotations from the wise are pearls of wisdom in capsules that could inspire and lead to new thoughts.

I have been trying to develop over the years an insight into how people act and behave in certain ways and how they go to extraordinary lengths to hide their real intentions. I am intrigued why we fail to practice what we preach. I am speechless when I listen to someone attributing to me qualities beyond my imagination or someone praising another person with exaggerated superlatives. I am saddened by the news reports about the young and not so young committing suicide for frivolous reasons. I also note with wonder how emaciated beggars aggressively beg in our streets with eternal hope on their sleeves. I note with dismay that the youth worship movie stars and sports heroes and not a Gandhi or a Mandela. I wonder why we do not have a Steve Jobs amongst us. I reflect on whether the life in this planet was decided and created by an unknown Creator or evolved over countless years or was designed by human ingenuity and effort. I am disappointed that laws are different for the rich and the poor. Why does a country of billion people win only one or two medals in the Olympics? Are we better of being optimistic rather than pessimistic? Is the attainment of success the alpha and the omega of our existence? How do we train children and young people to face failures? Is religion, if practiced verbatim as in the scriptures, a millstone around the neck of the youth of today struggling for survival in the remorseless marketplace or an oasis in the merciless desert of troubles in their lives? Are Westerners superior as a race just because their material progress is faster? Myriad questions, but inconclusive answers. My moments were filled by attempting to find answers to some of those questions. It gave me a certain amount of amusement and pleasure in musing about them. The musings have been given shape as short essays.

However, I also discover, to my satisfaction, that other minds have burned considerable hours of midnight oil studying many of those questions which had flamed my curiosity. Let me give you a couple of examples. It bothers me to note that people derive a secret sort of pleasure from the misfortune of others. Many get disturbed even when a good friend gets a promotion or an award. The feeling of pleasure degrades the soul. But it hides in the shadows of darker corners of the mind. The pleasure is more intense if the fallen is a famous person. But I realised that it was a much studied topic when I read ‘The Joy of Pain’ by Richard H. Smith, a University of Kentucky psychology professor who built a career around studying it and similar emotions. The ugly delight has a German word, Schadenfreude, meaning ‘harm-joy’. Dr Smith argues that we have an addiction to social comparisons so as to fix our position in the social order. It is intense and imprinted in our genes. Interestingly, he says that studies show that even monkeys and dogs measure themselves against their peers. Although we have basic animal instincts and savage behaviour, we want to be recognised, pampered, and loved. Dr Smith continues to say that Schadenfreude is not to be decried as it helps us to recognise our dark side and enhances our self-worth by being aware that the greatest also have feet of clay.

I am intrigued by our difficulty of practicing the counsels of wisdom, pious exhortations, and sound advice found in religious scriptures and self-help books when we are in pain or affected by negativism. The reason for such behaviour is explained in an interesting study of this phenomenon by George Lowenstein, a professor of economics and psychology at Carnegie Mellon University. He developed the theory of hot and cold emotional states. When we are comfortable and free from any tribulations, we are stated to be in cold state and being in that state, we cannot predict our behaviour if we face hot state, that is when we are afflicted by negative situations (more in the essay ‘Walk the Talk’).

The essays are intended to provoke and make my own children and grandchildren and the youth at large ponder, debate, think, and find answers to the questions which they raise from time to time in my interactions with them. I will be gratified if they are encouraged to explore the thoughts in these pages more seriously so as to improve their knowledge and find their own explanations for the perplexing conundrums in their minds. It is hoped that the messages between these lines will help the readers to reflect on those questions as well.

A quote from Winston Churchill is apt and interesting, particularly for a nascent author: ‘Writing a book is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement; then it becomes a mistress, and then it becomes a master, and then a tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude, you kill the monster, and fling him out to the public.’

INVOCATION

‘Lord, you know that I am reaching into my twilight years. This is my prayer. Please deliver me from the obnoxious tendency of giving my opinion or advice on every subject in and out of context. Please deliver me from the arrogance of pretending to know the solutions to all problems.

Lord, give me some real sincere friends. Do not allow me to give unlimited lengthy explanation on all things under the sun. Instead, give me the ability to talk clearly and concisely. Let me not whine about aches and pains, but give me the patience to suffer such discomfort in silence. Do not give me a mean mind to find pleasure in other’s misfortunes.

Lord, I am not asking to improve my memory, but when I am questioned, teach me not to argue stubbornly on my facts. Teach me to understand that I do make mistakes often. Give me a pleasant demeanour and do not make me a grumpy old man. I do not want to pray to become a saintly person as I know that it is difficult to co-exist with such people. But do not make ever me a servant of the devil. Please give me the grace of finding goodness under any circumstance and the willingness to talk loudly about such goodness. Amen.’

Courtesy: Herbert Prochnow, Noted American author and toast master

(Many of us have a propensity to lecture others on our superior knowledge. We stubbornly argue on any subject to derive the pleasure of the last word. A few talk incessantly about the wealth and the achievements of their family and children to the exasperation of others. The prayer is to the good Lord for granting us the sublime gift of humility.)

PART 1

MUSINGS

INTRODUCTION

A musing is described as reflection, meditation, thought, or a product of contemplation. Even daydreams can be musings. They may be ‘elegant tapestry of quotations, aphorisms, and autobiographical reflections.’ The musings in these pages are my experiences and observations during the daily routines of my days. While some are satirical comments, others are based on true events. I wandered into personal reminiscences too. Many of us wonder and question the irrational behaviour and quixotic actions of our family members, friends, and colleagues on some occasions. The answers are not easily available, and we shrug and carry on. The reflections expressed here are intended to provoke and make the reader ponder and find explanations for some of these questions. Flights of fantasy, satire, and armchair critical observations are also included. Some are descriptions of daydreams and desires of the heart and soul. Vicissitudes of human emotion and behaviour fire my imagination leading to green fields of enquiry which encourage me to read more in search of answers. Searching and finding answers to such enquiries gives pleasure, and I enjoy writing about them. The writings convey some serious messages, which, hopefully, will guide the readers.

1

CHALLENGES OF TODAY

In a submission to the High Court of the State of Tamil Nadu, India, in September 2014, the Tamil Nadu police department reported that 2449 students committed suicide over the last five years in the State. In the period from January 2009 to August