Today Just Ain't My Day

By Bernita Putham

My book comes from life experiences and the joy of having girls which was, and still is, a challenge as you watch them grow both spiritually and mentally. My home life was grounded. My parents believed in discipline and old-time beatings.
Living in warm surroundings with grandparents who were in our lives, and aunts and uncles who also watched over us when we were younger has taught us that life is, and always will be, about family first.
As you read in my book, you will see that every day started out with either a Scripture or just a simple prayer to say Thank you, Lord for bringing me through.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 7, 2011
• ISBN: 9781465310521

Bernita Putham

Barbara A. Page is a mother of three daughters and grandmother to two grandsons. She likes to spend time with her family, friends, and associates at work. She lives in Florence, South Carolina and is pursuing writing books as entertainment for adults and children.

Book preview

Today Just Ain’t

My Day

Barbara A. Page

Copyright © 2011 by Barbara A. Page.

Library of Congress Control Number:       2011961472

ISBN:         Hardcover                               978-1-4653-1051-4

                   Softcover                                 978-1-4653-1050-7

                   Ebook                                      978-1-4653-1052-1

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Contents

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

There was a DJ when I was younger that said, and I quote, Be careful the way you treat someone on your way up, because you never know when and if you need them on your way down.

It was a lot of fun writing this book. As I stated earlier, this was my daily journal and I decided to share some laughter with people to let them know that even though it looks rough now, tomorrow has got to be a brighter day.

Acknowledgments are to my beloved parents who were together for 60 years as they celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary at my middle daughter’s wedding. There was no other time that I felt so close to family than that day. I also want to express the love for my daughters who would call me late at night to have those mother/daughter conversations. Once on the phone, we cried and they said they remembered when they were younger I never hugged them. Well, because of that, we now don’t have to hang up the phone without saying I LOVE YOU to remind them that they have a special place in my heart.

April 20, 1994

Will God hear his cry when trouble cometh upon him? Will he delight himself in the Almighty? Will he always call upon God? I will teach you by the hand of God; that which is with the Almighty will I not conceal. Job:28

Back to work after taking off for my birthday. I haven’t worked on my birthday for at least twenty years. I celebrate this day if no one else does. My oldest is nineteen, the middle is eighteen and the youngest is thirteen. Three girls in one household, all with different attitudes. I sometimes wonder if this is God’s way of punishing me for them things I did that I didn’t tell nobody. The song says, SAID I WASN’T GOIN’ TELL NOBODY, BUT I, COULDN’T KEEP IT TO MYSELF, SAID I COULDN’T KEEP IT TO MYSELF, BUT I, COULDN’T KEEP IT TO MYSELF, SAID I WASN’T GOIN’ TELL NOBODY, BUT I, COULDN’T KEEP IT TO MYSELF, WHAT THE LORD HAS DONE FOR ME." Well he gave me these three and I sho’ couldn’t keep that to myself, cause they yuh! I couldn’t even sell nare one of them, cause they’d bring’em back. Tee, that oldest will talk you into a bad dream. She has the last word and that’s all there is to it. The middle one, well, she’s just slick. I mean slick as a baby’s bottom. If someone did it, I would look to her first, cause more than likely she did it! Well, the last one who was the most spoiled brat in these parts, is just mean, M-E-A-N!

Ms. Tamara is the oldest one and she’s now living in Texas with my older sister and well, she’s going to College, Texas A&M. Boy, what a huge school. I remember going down there to register her. I looked at the campus and had no idea there were schools this size. Well, the fee is larger than the campus and of course, someone like me could never afford to pay such huge fees. When we got there that day to register her, I can’t quite remember his name, but we were in the registration office waiting to see him. He came out, a very pleasant man. I was sweating from fear that I would have to look at her and say no, we can’t afford it. Her father was no where around when it came time for this part. He felt that it wasn’t his place. It was all about him and his family, not her. God, can you look out for us? My sister, who has the finances, was ready to step in and pay her tuition to attend this University, but I know I would never hear the end of it if she paid.

Finally he came out and said, Ms. Bert, step into my office please! By the time he showed me what her fees included, I looked at him and said, Sir, I truly appreciate your taking the time to speak with me and my family, but because I’m a single parent, there is no way I nor my family could ever afford to pay this. Hell, at that point I was ready to leave! Let’s get on back down that road from whence we came. South Bound was where I was headed not to ever look back. High School was fine, but college? Tamara has been here since 10th grade and graduated with honors from Kempner High School, but since she was considered an out-of-state student, the fees were higher.

We then proceeded to walk out when he said, Ma’am, please be seated, let me see what I can do. He got on his phone and made a call. He then handed one of his students a folder and asked them to run across campus to get this signed for him. We waited around for at least another forty-five (45) minutes when he returned with some papers that said, WELCOME TO TEXAS A&M! He was able to show her in-state and PELL GRANTS COMING OUT THE YANG-YANG.

Lord, you sho’ was good that day. Reminds me of that movie, Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory—I’ve Got a Golden Ticket! That musta’ been what he had them sign on the dotted line was that golden ticket, cause she show got the better deal in the End. She’s in and getting ready to be an AGGIE! Let’s see where that takes her.

April 8,2007

Thou shalt not offer the blood of my sacrifice with leaven; neither shall the sacrifice of the feast of the Passover be left unto the morning. The first of the first fruits of thy land thou shalt bring unto the house of the Lord thy God. Thou shalt not seethe a kid in his mother’s milk.

—Exodus34:25

I give all honor to God, Allah, Jehovah, Mother Mary, Alpha and Omega, but you know again I speak adamantly that honor should be bestowed upon our ancestors and of course, Grandma or as she is defined, Big Mama!

Comedians now say Grandmothers are in their forties, some may say they’re as young as thirty. Mygrandmother (Mutter as we called her, that’s all I knew til I got grown, then I realized she had a real name). Her name was Ms. Doreen. She was old and gray when I was born. We didn’t stay over there much cause my mom didn’t like her Stepfather, Mr. Lonnie. Well, he didn’t like her nor her brother either, so we didn’t visit much, and if we did, it was only on Sundays. I remember Mom and Dad taking us just about every Sunday afternoon after church somewhere. There were only a few families, when I was young, who had a car. We was considered uppity Black folk. We had three meals a day, pretty frocks to wear to school and different clothes to play in. You couldn’t tell me nothin’ when I was young. I was cute,rich and had no idea there was a difference in black and white. Huh!-put that in your pipe and smoke it! That was a saying when I was younger. I don’t think you folk today know what a pipe is, at least not the one my granddad smoked. They have pipes now, but that ain’t it. The ones they smoked were legal. Get a grip, folk!

And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lillies of the field,how they grow, they toil not, neither do they spin? Matthew6:28

Today is just today and that’s all I got to say about that. If God allowed me to live this long, apparently he either got somethin’ in store for me or he got a good sense of humor. I ain’t wit’ it today, so I’m just gonna keep on living till he call my name. They say, the only one gonna hear him call you is you! And did I say I ain’t going to hell either? Well, let’s just set the record straight right now. I can’t even stand no air-conditioning. I remember one time when I was with my friend, his air conditioner broke down and we had to sleep with no air. Man, I thought I was gonna die, and to make matters worse, he loved to sleep up under me. It was hot and he was hot. Lord, Lord, I just got a vision, it sho’ was hot, but he was nice to lay up under. Let me focus, I got caught up in the moment. Anyway, back to hell, I ain’t going, so you who already there, don’t look for me, I’ll holler at ya’ on the other side if I can, if not, !oh well then!

Jesus saith unto her, I that speak unto thee am he. And upon this came his disciples, and marveled that he talked with the woman: yet no man said, What sleekest thou? Or, Why talkest thou with her? The woman then left her waterpot, and went her way into the city, and saith to the men, Come, see a man, which told me all things that ever I did: is not this the Christ?(John3:26-28)

OnEaster Sunday, children don’t even go to church like they used to. You may not go any other Sunday, butyour parents put you in your prettiest frock and krindlin’ slip and sent you to church, they may not go, but they at least sent you. Back in the day when my parents were rearing us, they took us to church to see who mama could pinch first or take outside for a good ass whipping and bring you back in church so you could go to sleep. That was way back then, they won’t even get up and fix you breakfast, you have to fin for yourself. Breakfast now consist of a bowl of cereal and a coke, or breakfast at McDonald’s. That’s not breakfast. It is just what it says, break-fast. They don’t want to hear your mouth so they get in their cars and run you to Mickey Finns, oops my bad not Mickey Finns but, Mickey D’s, (McDonalds, Burger King or Hardee’s) for a quick fix-it. Girl, if Mickey Finns was open on a Sunday, you’d never see the inside of a church. You’d pass by a few, but never stopped to go in. You come back home and get dressed and catch the bus or the neighbor and go to church to talk. You don’t have any clue what’s going on because you ain’t never been or if you’ve been, it’s for Vacation Bible School or they were giving school supplies for the back—to—school affair that is donated each year to challenging parents. You know why I call them challenging, cause they see what they can get for free and how many more food stamps they can get with one more child in the household. I call that challenging, don’t you?

Where are the social workers? My sister worked as a social worker when my girls were small. I remember her saying they used to go to the home where the children lived, to see if there actually was a roof over their heads or food in the fridge,or how many baby daddy’s living there beating off the system. Now, they say funds limit them from making such visits, plus it’s so dangerous. It wasn’t that long ago when my sister worked for them, some thirty years ago. She told me of a time she went to visit a home in the country and when she sat down, there was a snake on the top of a dresser and, of course, she then proceeded to leave quickly. Never to make that home visit again. I don’t know whether she was telling the truth or not, but no one dared to question her. She said noone protected her when she had to go make house calls.

As a matter of fact, I remember people used to call our house looking for her after hours, thanking her for coming to see them.

Again, that was then. Oh, so long ago! People were people then, not a number on a computer screen or in someone’s file. (#699). Speaking of numbers, anybody know what number our Infamous President got riding around in his head (#666 possibly?) The Anti Christ comes to mind? (Just thinking out loud-I know this was an inside voice thing, but I felt the need to say it, sho’ glad I got that off my chest!). What you think? Mr. President, no disrespect to you, nottin’ but mad love for ya, cause you the man, please don’t beat me for saying that. (OUCH!!!) Damn, I felt that lick across my back. Watch what you hitting, cause we don’t take that no mo". I ain’t my ancestors, nay’re one of them. I might have their blood running through my veins, but it ain’t the same material. It’s a little lighter!

And it came to pass, that after the year was expired, at the time that kings go out to battle Jo’ab led forth the power of the army, and wasted the country of the children of Ammon, and came and besieged Rab’bah. Bur David tarried at Jerusalem. And Jo’ab smote Rab’bah and destroyed it. And David took the crown of their king from off his head, and found it to weigh a talent of gold, and there were precious stones in it; and it was set upon David’s head: and he brought alsoexceeding much spoil out of the city.(1Chronicles20:1-2)

Anyone seen "Madea’s Family Reunion? Okay, get your head off the part where those dirty old men was sitting there reminiscing about what shoulda coulda been. You can’t now and probably couldn’t then, but thinking don’t hurt nobody.

Anyways, I’m speaking about the part where Maya Angelo, Cicely Tyson and the families gathered where Grandma was sitting and Ms. Tyson spoke. That was the most authentic moment in the movie for me. To watch two dynamic women come together on the same film and stand before so many and say this is not what family was about. Get the movie I cried watching it, not black market, but the actual paid-for movie. I spend my money on sound things like black plays, movies, art, dinner and a movie. Oh, men, put this section down, you couldn’t relate to this. Remember, that cost too much. A dinner and a play, what? What do you get after that? A black woman ain’t worth two things in one night, unless she’s the one paying, but when a white woman goes out with a black man, he’s opening doors, pulling chairs out at the table, holding her hand and paying for the drinks after the dinner and movie. What you got boys, is a Barbie doll, bobbing her head back and forth, stroking her hair, pulling on that tight dress and he’s loving every moment of it, taking care of her like she might break. Black women made of a different cloth. I seen some beautiful black women. Educated and all. You get two in one with a black woman who has a degree. She can take care of herself, and can actually speak a foreign language. Give us credit, we ain’t all baby makers, well, let me stop there. White women have your babies, they just get rid of a few of them before you ask her to marry you. (Oops shoulda used that inside voice again, oh well)

The Bible plainly states that woman was made of Adam’s rib,it didn’t give a color code. You think maybe a black woman was made of Malik’s rib instead of Adam’s and that’s why we’re treated differently, cause Malik don’t give a rip about his black woman. He’s too busy out there with three or four others. Ain’t got time for his own woman.

Let’s go back to when the Bible indicates that Eve made Adam take a bite out that apple. He ain’t been right since.

April 17, 2007

"For we are born at all adventure: and we shall be hereafter as though we had never been: for the breath in our nostrils is as smoke, and a little spark in the moving of our heart.

Wisdom 2, Wisdom of Solomon

Two days away from my birthday and students shooting at Virginia Tech. What the hell? Why are we asking students what they think we could have done to prevent this from happening again?(Hello!)Madea saysWheresBig Mama? "If we had more BigMamas, you wouldn,t have to worry about that ever happenin’ again.BigMama would have been the first on the scene ready to shoot, whip or kick ass, what ever her mind tells her to do. I’ll tell you wha’, you wouldn’t have to worry about these boys being behind bars. BIG MAMA woulda’ seen to that. It just wouldn’t happen. She’s the warden, nurse, social worker and guard, all wrapped up in one-two for the price of one is what you would’a got! She’da slapped’em up side their heads and asked them just what the hell they thought they was doing when that shooting occurred. Boy, take them plats out yo’ head and comb that mess. Looking like a hot damn mess!! Goin’ on in that bathroom and pull them damn pants up and come out ya’ and apologize for actin’ stupid. Didn’t nobody raise you like that, you hear me? Huh, I didn’t hear you? You hear me!!!! Now Grandma love ya, don’t let me have to come back down here to you, you hear me?

Let us crown ourselves with rosebuds, before they be withered

Wisdom of Solomon

I went last night to pick up my grandson from visiting his mom. Imagine that, wanting to have a boy come out of her and now proclaims independence on her rights as a real mom. I love her unconditionally, don’t get me wrong, but I feel that her priorities and opinions are off track, but I guess my mom thought the same thing of me. Oh well, that’s life as it is.

She’s in Pennsylvania where I understand all walks of cultural lives hide out. Parents who are well off pay their sons and daughters to live there and explore the world, and stay out of their hair. No problem, but to me, you wanna explore what life is, pay your own way.

He’s seven and loves his mom. He can’t help it, he came out of her womb, not mine. I love my mom considering all the variables. That’s all I got to say about that.

We’re just getting over IMUS speaking out about the Rutger’s basketball team and how he called them nappy head ho’s. Well, what can I say, but that’s what he felt and he didn’t use his inside voice as my daughter loved to tell my grandson, when he got a little rambunctious. (Shh!!! Use your inside voice, and he would whisper back at her, okay!!!) Cute as a button, but gotta be taught. Back to IMUS and Raymond who decided on one of his late night stand up comics he wanted to talk back to the audience and call someone a nigger!!! Okay, was he a nigger or what? I call Blacks and Whites, Hispanics, JEWS, Chinese,Filipinos, Japanese, all of them other folk niggers, if they act like one. We got folk on TV defining what a nigger is, as if we didn’t already know, if you have to describe who’s a nigger, then you don’t even need to be opening your mouth to explain. As a race, black folk already know. White folk and others already know. Get off TV and radio explaining to ignorant folk who’s a