Seasons in Transition

By A.K. Turner

Love and loss serve as guides during our lifetime. Both emotional encounters evoke passion, culminating in waves of happiness and groundswells of despair. Euphoria and turmoil are the expressive surges of electrifying sensations we encounter as we engage another solitary spirit on the path to discovery. Seasons in Transition captures the emotive complexity of living a life in relationship to self, another, and the natural environment.


Seasons in Transition records the emotional roller coaster ride along A.K. Turners path to self-discovery and soul retrieval. Each page describes raw and powerful feelings universally familiar yet uniquely personal. It is an ageless tale of lost love, ensuing chaos, growing awareness and eventual wisdom.

I lived without you before, I knew I could again, I didnt want to. Life continues bringing joys Ive met before and new sorrows I dont understand. Turner captures the despair, loneliness, and self-doubt of a cast-out lover forced into a seemingly inescapable abyss.

She drove out of my life after seven years of calm. I watched from behind a curtain with tears streaming down my face only to glimpse tears of her own. That did not make it easier for me, only more real. Life consists of changes, but change, when it occurs, stops the routine of life and places it on momentary hold. There I was on hold, wanting the old and familiar back, daring not to let go of a life and a love, feeling helpless and hopeless. My other half had deserted the ship, and I alone must struggle in rough seas looking for something that I found once, unlikely to find again. She left as if escaping from a prison camp. Maybe we were both prisoners.

When Turner eventually encounters another solitary spirit on the search of self-awareness, turmoil is replaced by euphoria as their loves surges with electrifying speed and intensity. As the seasons pass, the relationship ripens and mellows to a delicious richness providing each with the joy of a loving life together.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Feb 13, 2009
• ISBN: 9781462813872

A.K. Turner

Breath The fragile awareness Of being And Non-being Consciousness housed In cellular matter For an undetermined time Supports life Air moving In and out In accordion motion Measures out Precious time Finite Moments Nancy Puglisi, Ph.D. is a faculty member at Plymouth State University in the graduate school where she is the Director of the Personal Approaches to Transformation and Healing, PATH, Institute and Organizational Approaches to Transformation and Healing, OATH, Institute. Dr. Puglisi is also the Director of Organizational Health for the University System of New Hampshire where she created and leads one of the first health promotion programs for faculty and staff in higher education. Reflections from The Forest House is an eclectic collection of poetry capturing reflective moments in space and time. Puglisi’s first book, Fishing without a Hook - Catching Moments at Work was published in 2009.

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Copyright © 2009 by A.K. Turner.

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CONTENTS

TODAY

FALL—

TWENTY-FIVE YEARS AGO

WINTER

SPRING

SUMMER

FALL—EPILOGUE

TWENTY-FIVE YEARS LATER

To the woman who set fire to my life and the

women who fuel the flames

TODAY

Wondering if I published my own writing, mediocre by comparison to yours, might you be motivated to finally share your own magic with the world?

Should my pen be thrown into the sea

The thoughts I hold

Buried in the sand

I waited

To see if your work surely did surpass my own

Meager as it was

No words have been stamped by the press

No enlightenment to the masses from your hand

So I have decided that I will ride my dream

Into the hearts of humankind

While you watch

FALL—

Twenty-five years ago

She drove out of my life after seven years of calm. I watched from behind a curtain with tears streaming down my face only to glimpse tears of her own. That did not make it easier for me, only more real. Life consists of changes, but change, when it occurs, stops the routine of life and places it on momentary hold. There I was, on hold, wanting the old and familiar back, daring not to let go of a life and a love, feeling helpless and hopeless. My other half had deserted the ship, and I alone must struggle in rough seas looking for something that I found once, unlikely to find again. She left as if escaping from a prison camp. Maybe we were both prisoners.

Years will pass

Seasons will come and go

We will age in the absence

Of our separated selves

Meeting occasionally

To discover

New wrinkles

Recreating moments

From yesterday

Tuesday

Direction comes from within each one of us, not through or by someone else. I am rudderless, having no direction and desiring none. Castaneda states in Separate Reality, But you must first know that our acts are useless and yet we must proceed as if we didn’t know it. It sounds so negative, yet I feel I am coping moment to moment, forgetting the fullness of the day and night. A feeling of emptiness, loneliness, drifting through time that is no longer my own consumes my awareness. I keep finding pieces of me that I have misplaced. I don’t know if all the pain has hit me yet. I think there is more to come.

Internal volcano

Erupting within

Lava of depression

Smoldering heart

Smothering my life

Mighty magic mountain

Towering in full view

Images of a hollow hill

Crumbling silently

Wednesday

The gentle ticking of a Baby Ben clock keeps me company on this lonely evening. It is my first weekend alone. Initially feeling out of control, internal forces have taken over and grounded me. Reading and writing center my being. There is nowhere to go and nowhere to hide. I am here.

I lived without you before

I knew I could again

I didn’t want to

Life continues bringing joys

I’ve met before

And new sorrows

I don’t understand

Thursday

Do all relationships have to be so difficult? One friend, for far too long, has hung onto a relationship that isn’t working but is unwilling or unable to let go. Another friend never gives fully of self and wonders why authentic love is illusive. Did I hang on too long, or did I hold back? Maybe I am somewhere in the middle. I have seen people inflict pain on others not knowing or caring what they do. What have I done? How did I act? What misdeeds have led me to this moment? The pain of this loss is new. It is a loss of self as well as the loss of a partnership. So what now? How do I move forward in my life? What are the options? Do I retreat into myself, living alone containing my emotional being for just me? Do I move into superficial relationships protecting my inner core from the onslaught of the destroyers of hearts? Ah, but then I would be the phony one, inflicting pain on others such as I have suffered myself.

Tomorrow came before I realized

Yesterday was gone

Didn’t I know you once

We shared the seventh inning stretch

I haven’t seen you since

Where have you gone

Our past is planted in the country meadows

Growing fields of yesterday

For us to reap

Alone I harvest the memories

Wondering why we don’t create more

A part