White Horse: The Secrets of a Minor

By Kidd McClellan

While growing up on 5th-N-O street, N.W., Washington, D.C. life wasn't easy for Dwight Whitehorse Sanders. He was a poor under-privileged youth who often stayed hungry. When it came to his younger brother and sister being teased by some ruthless bullies, Whitehorse's stomach and heart became overly f

• Language: English
• Publisher: Chris McClellan
• Release date: Sep 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781087979397

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Copyright © 2021 by Kidd McClellan

All rights reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means without prior written permission of the copyright owner.

This book is a work of fiction. names, characters, business, events and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Kidd McClellan

Washington, DC

https://linktr.ee/KiddMcClellan

Email: [e-mail]

White Horse: The Secrets of a Minor. -- 1st ed.

ISBN Print: 978-1-0879-7938-0

ISBN Ebook: 978-1-0879-7939-7

Acknowledgements

To all of my readers, I want to personally thank you all for taking the time out to read my debut novel. I hope that you enjoy the story and the many to come. Peace!

Acknowledgements to my family. My mother and father, Christine Jones and Marvin McClellan. Without you two there would be no me. To my brother and sister’s - Marvin McClellan, Ulyesses Jones, Thomasine McNeil, Adrienna McNeil, and Mona McClinton Long. To my uncles and aunts, Bobby Jones, Yates Jones ( RIP ), Hazel Jones ( RIP ), Janice Jones ( RIP ), Doris Edmonds ( RIP ), Lillie Jones ( RIP ), Nancy Manago ( RIP ), and Ann McNeil. Cousins, Gerald and Marvin Wingfield, Veronica Wingfield, Stacey Angel Jones, Kareen Jones ( RIP ), Lil Stacey Jones, Lavance and Ricardo Edmonds, Melvin, Patrick, Janel, and LaShawn Jones, Fredrick and Melvin McNeil. James Gaston Sr. and Jr. Maureen Gaston, Rachael, E-Jay and all of the Whiterspoons. Fenny, K.K. Fats, Ryan, Robbie and Kyree. Little Bobby, TySean, Stkinkpop and Fred Jones. Cortellia, Hardtime, Derky and Redbone, May you all RIP. Kevin, Antwon, Valencia, Rodney, Lafeyette and Angie Jones. Tasha and Teresa Samuals. Tyra, Stephanie, Terry, Madison, Taylor, Tyrone, Shantice, Teshaun. Chiquita, Tawana, James and Charles Manago. Meagon and Alexix Manago. Renzo Steward. Lorenzo Plater. To you all, I am very proud of you. Keep up the good work.

SHOUTOUTS

Whitehorse, Fu Davis, Marvin Sanders, Antoine White, Ronnie Isler, Tom Sykes, Wendel Smith, Gerald Hanna, Tim Tim, Gerald Andrews, Kennyman, Kendal Taylor, Jeff Edlen, Nate Baily, Rick Baily, Lammar Simmons. Robert Baily Ducksauce, Willy Walker, Pety Maurice and Malcom Weaver, Truck, Jerome and Carlos Crosson,Lydon Banks, Shawn Ruffin, Ned and Derrick McAllister and where ever you are, Mario Mendez. I Love you all.

Special Thanks

Chill Haywood ( Greensboro ) NC, Antwon Tate, Showtyme and my bae Stefanie wise. I love u all in a different way. Collectively you all changed my life once I came home. And to all of my nieces and Nephews, Key, Santia, Peaches, Twon, Shawn, Annie, Suave, Alana, Zoey and the rest of you all. I used your nicknames just to make you mad. Stephanie Waller there are no words. This dream all started with you. I love you strong black woman. Free Trey Manning, Marvin Davis, Fouley Davis, And Lamont Easily.

Table of Contents

CHAPTER 1: THE BEGINNING

CHAPTER 2: IF ONLY I HAD MORE TIME

CHAPTER 3: STEPPING UP MY GAME

CHAPTER 4: WHO IS THIS NIGGA?

CHAPTER 5: GOING TO SEE Bill

CHAPTER 6: TONIGHT’S THE NIGHT TO KILL

CHAPTER 7: IT’S TIME TO SAY GOODBYE

CHAPTER 8: TWO BIRDS - ONE STONE

CHAPTER 9 : THIS AIN’T NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF CAKE

CHAPTER10: HOW COULD THIS BE?

CHAPTER 11: HOME SWEET HOME

CHAPTER 12: ARE YOU SURE THAT HE’S STILL ALIVE

CHAPTER 13 : I CAN’T MAKE NO MORE MOVES UNTIL l’M READY

CHAPTER 14: GOING BEHIND THE WALL

CHAPTER 15: SAYING THANKS AND GOODBYE TO MY SOURCE

CHAPTER 16: CHANGE IS GOOD

CHAPTER 17: HOW QUICKLY THINGS COULD CHANGE

CHAPTER18: HOW SWEET IT IS!

CHAPTER 19: THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING

CHAPTER 20: FINDING DIAMOND

CHAPTER 21: PAYING MY LAST RESPECTS

CHAPTER 22: MAKING THE CALL

CHAPTER 23: All ABOUT THE CRAFT D ONE

CHAPTER 24: DEALING WITH MY SITUATION

CHAPTER 25: MAKING MOVES BEFORE I GO

CHAPTER 26: IT’S TIME FOR ME TO CHANGE

CHAPTER 27: IT’S TIME TO PAY YOUR DUES

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I could never forget when I was just ten years old and yet to have experienced a full stomach. It was the year 1984, my father never came around and my mother was stuck with three kids. Me being the oldest, my little sister Charetta, who was eight years old, and my baby brother, Trey, who was only six years old. My mother was not ready to take care of us at only twenty-five years old, but she did her best.

One morning I woke up hungry, as usual, to the yelling of Christine’s voice, Dwight Whitehorse Sanders, get your butt in here boy and let mommy breathe on you.

As I walked down the roach infested hallway, knocking over the many useless things that we didn’t need in our small apartment down on 5th N-O Street, I made my way to my mother’s room.

Christine was a nice looking woman standing about 5’ 7’’ tall, weighing a little over 135 pounds. Although her eyes told you her whole story, she still managed to stay in good shape with high hopes that one day Mr. Right would come along and save the day.

Yes, mother? I said as my eyes met with hers. Look at my baby! I keep telling you that one of these days you are going to be the one to save this family, she said, with a sound of confidence in her voice.

Listen to me son and listen carefully. Your father was what we young girls called a Hound and was also a small time drug dealer that was showing off every new thing that he had gotten. All of the fly girls wanted him in spite of the fact that he was older than most of us by at least four years. For some reason, your father chose me out of all of them and I wasn’t even popular at the time. We started dating each other on a regular basis and before you knew it we were an item. He told me that he is a very important person and that he would be cheating on me, but at that time I didn’t care. So, against my mother’s will, I ran off to live with Dwight. At first things went smoothly, but they quickly changed when I started getting overly protective and jealous. Here I was only fifteen years old, living with a nineteen year old boy, believing that I had the whole world figured out already. My mother said as a few tears rolled down her cheeks.

But boy was I in for a real surprise. She managed to squeeze out in between her tears.

Mommy please don’t cry, crying is for babies! I said, not knowing anything.

She quickly responded, No darling, that’s not true. If crying was just for babies, then why do you think that God has given tears to adults? So that they could use them, I said frightened.

That’s right baby, so we could use them. She went on, "Your father bought me all of the new clothes, latest tennis shoes, and even gave me a beeper. All of the other girls started getting jealous of me because I was fly. A couple of months later I discovered that I was pregnant with you and, believe it or not, your father was happy about the whole situation. As the months went flying by and my stomach got bigger and bigger, your father decided that he would start staying out all times of the night and, sometimes, not come home at all. One night, after he stayed out all night, I decided that I’d had enough, so when he finally came in I questioned him about his whereabouts. He told me that he paid all the bills around here and didn’t owe me no type of explanation and then went on about his day. Eventually, I’d grown tired of his ass so I started investigating his every move and found something that I didn’t want to find.

Just as he said he would, your father was cheating on me with an older woman named Tasha. I couldn’t wait to confront his ass about it, so one night when he came in the house I jumped on his back, crying and screaming, ‘I thought you said that you loved me.’ I called him all types of dirty dogs and told him that I knew he was cheating on me because I’d been following him. He just looked me straight in my eyes and said, ‘So what I’m cheating. I still love you and want you to stay my girl!’ Child, I went off on him for saying that to me. I started kicking, slapping, scratching and cursing. So he grabbed me and said, Christine, calm your ass down before you lose that baby. I’m not going to lie, at that time I wasn’t even caring about you, so I kept on cussing. To stop me, your father just turned and left out of the door. The very next day when he came back in to check on me and to make sure that I was alright, I went crazy on him again. But, before I could get into my whole tantrum, he asked me to be quiet. Although I didn’t want to hear nothing that he had to say, I figured that I had nothing to lose."

My mother went on to tell me what my father said to her. He told her, Look girl, I told you what I was about in the beginning, but you are a very young girl and there’s a lot you need to learn about life, let alone the game. I’m about to let you in on something and it’s either going to make us or, perhaps, it’s going to break us, but in either case, I’m going to tell you anyway. Now this may sound hardcore, but it’s just the way it is. You don’t own me Christine and you damn sure don’t have a pussy that’s made of gold. In my opinion, you’re lucky that a nigga like me is supporting your broke ass. I tell you no lie; I’ve grown to love you. I really do! But, we’re not married, so I’m not breaking any laws by cheating on you. The bottom line is this! Every night I come home to you and I give you all of my money. My heart belongs to you, but you’re tripping because I’m putting my dick in some other bitch?

She continued telling me her story, By this time son, the blood in my veins was almost boiling over, so I told him to take a real good look at me and I started cursing again, ‘I’m carrying your baby you ho ass nigga and if you don’t change your little boy ass ways I’m leaving your ass. Son, nothing I said fazed him. He said, Look Christine, you could do what you choose to do, but I’m going to do me. It’s not like I didn’t warn you beforehand about what you were getting yourself into, but I did and you agreed. Now, I would love for you to stay, but I can’t make you, so if you choose to leave then I won’t attempt to stop you.’ I honestly thought that your father was bluffing baby, but he wasn’t. So, I gathered up all of my things, told him to kiss my ass, to never call me again, that he didn’t have a son, and then I called him a bitch! I walked out of his house with not even enough money to get home. He came out of the house behind me and said, I’m sorry you chose to go this route and I would never again ask you to be second to none. I came out here to tell you that I have the utmost respect for you. If you-ever change your mind you’re welcome to come back, but just don’t take too long. Here’s enough money to get yourself an apartment and I’ll continue to pay the rent until you are old enough to get a job of your own.’ As soon as he finished, I turned around and said, Nigga, Fuck You! and then spit in his face. That was the last time I saw your daddy, son."

Mommy, I hate him! I said, feeling sorry for her.

No child, don’t hate your father because he is a good man and although, at the time, I couldn’t understand what he was trying to say to me, I’ve grown to realize that he was right the whole time. I knew from the start how he was because he is the one who told 1ne. My mistake was that I tried to change him, or selfishly hoped that he would want to change just for me, but I was naive then.

What do you mean mommy? I was eager to know.

She responded, Well, some other time child, it’s getting late and you and Charetta have to get ready for school, but I promise you that one of these days you’ll understand everything that I’m telling you right now and why I’m telling you, and you’re going to be thankful.

School was like a trial for me and my two siblings, and every day we couldn’t wait until lunch. When lunchtime came around all of the teachers knew that we were some hungry kids, but always pretended not to notice us. Instead, they would whisper every time that they thought we weren’t looking. The other kids were a whole different matter. They got many thrills out of teasing us on a daily basis, whether it was about eating or just plain talking about our clothes, it didn’t matter, they just constantly teased us. Now, at that particular time I didn’t mind them picking on me because I was old enough to ignore them, so I was able to pay them little or no attention at all. But, when they made either Charetta or Trey cry, then all bets were off. So, more often than not, I’d found myself in a fight.

Out of all of the kids in school, it was this little group of four people that were worse than them all. They were known as the four bullies, Raymond (the leader), Shed, Jamaine and Tom. These were the four people that jumped me every day, sending me home with a bloody nose.

Horse, why do them other kids mess with us all of the time? Charetta wanted to know.

I don’t know Pumpkin, maybe it’s because they don’t know any better! I said, trying to cheer her up.

Well, all of the kids in my class said that we was poor and that mommy’s on welfare. Is that true Whitehorse?

I quickly responded, "No Pumpkin, that’s not true.

We’re not poor, we have a place to stay and mommy has a job." When Christine became old enough she got a job as a secretary and just never quit.

Don’t worry lil’ sis, one of these days I’ll take care of all of us, I said to Charetta, not exactly knowing how myself, but very confident that someday I would.

Two years had passed and I quickly learned that Jr. High School was a much more brutal place than elementary school because the other kids were much bigger and meaner, but I wasn’t tripping too much off of them because for the past year I’d been taking up boxing and had gotten good at it. So, as long as they stayed clear of me then we wouldn’t have any problems.

Christine started complaining about her chest a lot lately, so she decided to go to Howard University Hospital to see a doctor and get an exam. As Christine, Charetta, Trey and I sat in the waiting room, the doctor finally came out.

Ms. Christine Gaston! Ms. Christine Gaston.

Yes. Here I am!

How are you doing, ma’am? Iain Dr. Synwender, the head doctor here at the hospital. It says here on the form that you’ve been experiencing chest pains. Is that true?

Yes, I’ve been feeling it now for a long time, but I tried to ignore it, hoping that it would pass by, but it never did.

Dr. Synwender stated, I wish that you would’ve come sooner Ms. Gaston. Let’s hope that it isn’t anything. Come with me please. Are your kids going to be alright out here by themselves?

Yes Sir, they are. My son, Dwight, is big enough to watch them, my mother said as she walked off with the doctor.

About an hour later Christine came back trying to fight off the tears, but couldn’t and I was trying to figure out why she was crying.

Mother, what’s wrong? Why are you crying? Because I love all of y’all so much, that’s why I’m crying son.

I don’t understand, loving us makes you cry, Mother? Trey managed to say with really no understanding.

What did the doctor say Mom? I asked, still wondering myself.

OH GOD, please give me the strength! my mother said very low, but not low enough to keep me from hearing.

Mommy, what’s wrong? Charetta cried.

Okay, y’all listen up. Mommy got some bad news to tell you. The doctor told me that I have a very bad case of cancer in my left breast and that he estimated that I only have less than a year to live.

This can’t be Mother, you can’t die, Charetta said as her eyes filled with tears.

What do you mean by die, Charetta? Stop, y’all are scaring me! Trey yelled out, still too young to fully understand what was going on.

Mom, do you believe that there’s a slight chance that you could beat this thing? I said, trying to keep calm.

No, Dwight, not according to Dr. Synwender. He says that it’s inevitable.

Mom, but... but...

Don’t worry child, we will try and make the best of this situation, my mother said, as she tried to console us.

For the next month, my mother drilled me on the facts of life. She told me how savage, violent, and ruthless a woman could become and to never put 100% trust in anyone, especially women. She told me how people would pretend to be my friend as long as they thought that I had something to offer them and to always expect the unexpected from everyone. She said that I may find some people that are genuine, but not too genuine that you should put them before your family. As she stared me straight in the eyes, she told me, Before long you will become the head of this family and right now you’re simply too young to get a decent enough job anywhere to provide for the three of y’all, so you must do what you have to do. Dwight, I know that you’re into that boxing stuff real hard and that you have gotten really good at it, and I also know that you’re making straight A’s in school. I want you to maintain all of that, but I also want you to get out there and learn them streets as well.

Mother, I don’t want to live that life. I could make it another way, I tried telling her.

I understand that Horse, I really do, and if I was healthy I would have never even suggested it, but I’m not healthy and you have to do something.

Christine went on schooling me, and I was surprised because I never really saw this in my mother, but she really knew her shit.

Dwight, I know that I didn’t bring my kids up on materialistic stuff because I know that y’all don’t need it to survive, but I have brought y’all up on principles, integrity, honor, and love for one another. Son, you didn’t know this before but I’ve been training you from the very day that you were old enough to comprehend. You’re already a very intelligent person, so if you could combine that which you’ve learned in school with the streets, then I believe that you would become a very successful, but yet dangerous person! But, first there are a few things that you need to know. Always remember that one’s appearance is everything because looks are everything. If you want people to know that you have money, then live rich, but beware that you would create some unknown enemies that way and eventually they would try and bring you down. If you are to succeed in the streets, then you must keep everyone out of your business as much as possible until you’re where you need to be. Never expose yourself too soon because the streets could eat you alive. Believe me when I tell you this son, I didn’t want this life for you, but Charetta and Trey need you now more than ever because we can’t let child services split y’all up.

She paused for a moment and continued, "Their father went and got himself killed right after Trey was born and your father said I waited too long and that he’ll take you, but he don’t need no extra kids because of the life he still live, so you are going to have to be their father. One of these days you are going to find a young lady to be by your side and it’s important that you make sure that she’s loyal to you and only you before you drop your guards around her completely. Know this son, pussy is a vicious weapon that would cloud your judgment real fast, so I’m telling you now that a woman’s pussy is a woman’s pussy and it could never be yours and that goes for you as well. What you got down there is yours and could never be a woman’s, so don’t never get caught up on no jealous shit.

If by chance your main man, or even Trey, fuck your wife I want you to thank them for exposing the disloyalty of her ways, but never kill a man because your wife is a slut. Remember that this is a weakness that could someday be your demise. If a woman knows that you would kill her because of her infidelity, then she may stab you in your sleep after she cheats just because she thinks you know. And never forget the mistake that I made and ran your father off. I thought that I owned him because I was having you and that wasn’t the case. I’m getting tired now, Whitehorse. Let me lie down and rest."

Christine gave me a lot to think about, truly she knew what she was talking about, but I didn’t necessarily want to get in the hustling game because my fights were good. I was now 21 and O and my coach was very proud of me. But mother just told me to never put no one before your family.

One day, walking home from Shaw Jr. High School, praising myself for still being on the honor roll, I noticed this man running really fast and scared looking. I heard the police sirens around the comer as the man came up to me handing me a nice size brown paper bag with a nice weight to it.

Here Shortie, take this! Do not open up that bag right here and whatever you do, don’t let the police see you with it neither, he said as he kept running down the street.

I put the bag under my shirt and walked pass the police with the fear that the zebras had for them lions that I’ve seen on TV, but I managed to stay on my feet and kept on moving. It seemed like the faster that I tried to move forward, the faster I went backwards. Man, I was scared!

When I finally made it home I told Christine what had just happened and showed her the bag.

Boy, open it up and let’s see what we have in there, she said with bright eyes.

When we opened the bag, I pulled out two guns, a Glock 21 and an 11 shot .45 caliber Smith and Wesson with two extra clips a piece. My mother pulled out some plastic with a lot of white stuff in it, and after looking at it for a moment she said that it was at least two spoons of raw dope in there.

Now I didn’t know exactly what that meant because I didn’t know anything about drugs, but I did know enough about guns to know if I found the right person I could get two hundred dollars easy for