Beauty Out of Ashes

By Valerie Martin

Beauty is not just in the face. Beauty is not in words. Beauty, for sure, is not in the dress. Beauty is in the Ashes. It is in the experience we live and the lives we touch. Beauty is the connection of the soul with its one God. The God who lives in each one of us. In this book, we grow familiar with the trauma and sickness Valerie faced. We learn about the seemingly insurmountable challenges in her life, and how she successfully overcame them. This story is about a strong woman who, through her resilient attitude and belief in God, overcame all the trials in life. She is blessed and grateful. And now, she is willing to share her story with you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Paramount Publisher
• Release date: Jul 16, 2021
• ISBN: 9781801282703

Book preview

Acknowledgment

I would like to acknowledge all the people who supported me throughout this book, those who evaluated every aspect of it, and those who believed in me. It is because of their constant support and trust that I was able to break through and achieve this milestone. I would also like to thank all the artists whose songs I have made an integral part of this book.

My heart truly belongs to you.

Thank you.

About the Author

Valerie Martin is a woman of strong resilience. After fighting cancer, and other challenges, she has continued to fight with her sickness, and has inspired her family, friends, and the people around her. Her belief in God and resurrection is an example for all to learn from and grow from. For more than (30) years Valerie has dedicated her life to Community Service. In this book, Valerie has used her words and experiences to reach out to all her readers and touch their souls.

Preface

Beauty is not just in the face. Beauty is not in words. Beauty, for sure, is not in the dress. Beauty is in the Ashes. It is in the experience we live and the lives we touch. Beauty is the connection of the soul with its one God. The God who lives in each one of us. In this book, we grow familiar with the trauma and sickness Valerie faced. We learn about the seemingly insurmountable challenges in her life, and how she successfully overcame them. This story is about a strong woman who, through her resilient attitude and belief in God, overcame all the trials in life. She is blessed and grateful. And now, she is willing to share her story with you.

Contents

Dedication

Acknowledgment

About the Author

Preface

Chapter 1: Be Resilient

Chapter 2: How to Overcome Fear

Chapter 3: Life Is Worth Fighting for

Chapter 4: The Promises of God Are Sure

Chapter 5: Through It All, I’ve Learned to Trust in God

Chapter 6: Hope Beyond Measure

Chapter 7: You Are Amazing

Chapter 8: Triumphant

Chapter 9: A Change Is Going to Come

Chapter 10: Listen to His Voice

Chapter 11: This Storm Is a Comma, Not a Period

Chapter 12: Just As I Am, Not As I Was

Chapter 13: Beauty Out of Ashes

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Chapter 1: Be Resilient

We walk by faith and not by sight.

-2 Corinthians 5:7

Life is difficult, complex, and unpredictable. You simply cannot change this. Life is a maze of challenges that we have to solve and pass through – just to get to the other side. It's the nature of things. But, you can prepare yourself for the next uninvited surprise.

How?

By building resilience. Let's assume if cars didn't have shock absorbers, every ride would be a miserable experience. The ride through life without shock absorbers – that is, resilience – would be the same. This clearly indicates that without resilience, it is difficult for you to live a happy and productive life. Remember, resilience is the opposite of fragility. Fragile means that just about everything upsets you. And if just about everything upsets you, you will spend a lot of time being angry and hurt. If you spend a lot of time complaining and being angry and hurt, you will not be a happy and healthy person.

'At the heart of resilience is a belief in oneself – yet, there is also a belief in something larger than oneself.'

What is the major difference between people with resilience and those without this quality? Adversity comes in many forms and sizes, yes, but resilient people do NOT let adversity define them. Not now... not ever. They find resilience by moving towards a goal beyond themselves, transcending from pain and grief by perceiving bad times as a temporary state of affairs.

How do they do that? Remember one thing: it is possible to strengthen your inner-self and your belief in yourself to define yourself as capable and competent. IT IS POSSIBLE to fortify your psyche and develop a sense of mastery in self!

So, how do we fortify our psyche to ride the waves of adversity – fighting difficulties, problems, obstacles, grief, and illness – rather than being pulled under by the gushing torrent? The thing is... those who can master resilience also tend to be skilled in handling emotional emergencies and adept at accepting what comes at them. There is flexibility rather than rigidity that they follow – yes, times are tough, but I know they will get a better type of mindset.

The old metaphor applies here perfectly: ‘Resilient people are like bamboo in a hurricane – they bend rather than break.’

People going through adversity and challenges in life can feel broken; it isn’t that they can’t... but there is still a part of them embedded deep inside that knows they won’t be broken forever. The kind of support from family and friends also matters a lot.

But in the end, THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

Lying next to David in the hospital bed, both of us crying, the CT scan images gleaming on the computer screen, my existence, as a mother, a daughter, and a wife, was fading slowly in front of my eyes. Having found out that I had cancer, as told by the oncologist, it was a bit sad, but thank God it didn't get to the point where David or I got too worried. There was a feeling within us that assured us that everything would turn out okay in the end.

There was a deafening silence in the room. David told me he loved me.

I don’t want to die, I whispered to him.

The thought of your loved ones leaving you is hard to be shrugged off, but when you know it’s you who is leaving them, it’s even harder to comprehend. The funny part about death is that it always comes unannounced. You’re going on normally with your life when a sudden knock on the door changes your life forever. Some of us can escape death while others give in to its deadly trap. This is beautifully explained in Terry Pratchett’s quote.

It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true; it's called life. – Terry Pratchett, the Last Continent

I told David that he should remarry and that I couldn’t accept the thought of him spending the rest of his life alone. I told him we should move to a smaller house immediately. It will save us the mortgage payments. We started calling family members, especially my son, who was serving in the Army at Fort Bragg.

My mom came to stay with us to lessen the burden for me. At one point, the doctor came by the room, and we talked about the scan and the future treatments. The first chapter of my life appeared to be ending – the one before my marriage and the second between life and death had just started. Instead of being an idealistic woman going through a life-changing moment, I found myself confused and lost. In the entire cancer trial, I realized that severe illness is not life-changing, but it is life-shattering. It felt less like a vision, an achievement, enlightenment of an important thing in life, and more like a path of burning coal from the hereafter. And I had to adjust to this new pattern of life.

My mother had arrived at my bedside. She was a woman of strong faith. She spent most of her life devoted to Christ and His service. Since the day I broke my cancer news to her, she had been praying day and night. As much as she tried to believe in science, her mind convinced her that God was the ultimate Savior, and in Him, she shall find the cure to my suffering. Sometimes I wished I was blessed with a faith as strong as her.

You’re a strong woman, Valerie. She said, You know that, don’t you?

I sighed. The words that once comforted me now seemed empty. All my life, I had been working toward a greater purpose, and now, all that went unrealized. I had planned to build a future with David to create a happy household for both of us. We were so close to making that happen for us.

Now that I was declared physically unfit, my imagined future and aspirations all seemed to go south. The cancer diagnosis was confirmed. My planned future with David and playing with my son’s future children no longer existed. Death, so unfamiliar to me, was now coming to pay a visit, standing in the doorway, waiting for me to let it in. I would be discharged the next morning. An oncologist appointment was planned for later in the week, but the nurse told me that my doctor would drop by any moment today.

Her name was Amelia Langston, and she wanted to introduce herself before the actual treatment began. My mom was sitting on the couch while David sat on my bed, holding my hand. The door opened, and the doctor walked in with a big smile, along with a trail of fresh air behind her. Beside her were a first-year resident and a nurse. She looked like she was in her early 60s. She had white hair, which is common among those who spend regular time with death. She pulled up a chair and sat facing me.

Hi, my name is Amelia, she said. I’m sorry to come unannounced today on such short notice, but I wanted to come by and introduce myself.

I smiled and shook her