My Unforeseen Journey: Losing Sight Gaining Vision

By Melanie Taddeo-Nxumalo

Welcome. I commend you for having the courage and strength to embark on this journey with me. Our time is so precious. You
do me a great honour. I will repay your kindness with a commitment to making your time here fulfilling and perhaps even
transformative. Although the routes we take may differ, you will find many similarities. And it is often easier and more enriching to travel with a companion.

This book has been a long time coming, but what I have learned is that everything happens when the time is right. I wanted to share my story to highlight the struggles and trials I have faced, as well as the resources and solutions I discovered along the way. Instead of telling my story in a chronological and true memoir style, to guide the narrative, I decided on descriptive
words for each chapter. Each speaks to a part of my journey, the varied aspects of my learning and growth, followed by a summary
of insights and questions to hopefully enlighten your path. I realize that our experiences will not be identical, however, I
feel there are so many parallels in people's lives that we can all learn from one another as long as we are open to different perspectives and possibilities for growth and healing.

Wearing my heart on my sleeve as I usually do, I want you to know it's likely that many emotions will be unleashed throughout this book. I encourage you to allow yourself to feel deeply. This can be a tough yet therapeutic process. Although it can be a bit gentler on us to experience through someone else's story, if you find yourself relating, give yourself permission to feel without judgement.

Always remember, you know what's best for your life. I am here to support you and to help lighten your burdens where I can. I know it can be frightening at times, but you are not alone. Please think of this book as a roadmap, a GPS to guide you through adversity. At the same time, know that there are never any cookie-cutter solutions. You need to find the right fit for your personal situation. Get comfy, buckle up, and let's take off on an adventure together.

A thought to ponder as you prepare to read on: when unpredictable factors or situations occurred when we were kids, we adapted quickly and rolled with the punches so-to-speak. So why is it that as we get older, when unforeseen change happens
in our lives, we are not as readily resilient? Let's explore.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Jul 7, 2021
• ISBN: 9781989304471

Book preview

Chapter 1

Dreams and Goals

My dream has always been to be a teacher. I was the little girl who would set up her dolls and stuffed animals on the bed facing the front of the classroom, which in my case was my bedroom. I would pretend I was teaching them about reading, listening to others, and being a good person. As I grew up, everything I did was focused on that dream. I volunteered as a Girl Guide leader, soccer coach, Sunday school teacher, and as a big sister.

Some of my part-time jobs included nanny, camp counsellor, any job where I could teach art, and simply help others. My dream was inspired by two of my own public-school teachers, Mrs. Belford and Ms. Shamanski. These ladies helped me recognize the talents I had, including a special way of invigorating people to do their best. Role models don’t come any better than these two incredible women. In high school, I discovered my love of art and met my third role model, art teacher EJ Light-man. She showed me that we can be creative in a variety of different ways. We all have the ability to express a message that is important to us and encourage others to do the same.

Looking back, it was these three powerful individuals who inspired and guided me, putting me on the right path to making my childhood dream a reality. But when the stroke happened, it was as if my dream had been railroaded. It had to be pushed aside because there were more important things to deal with—of course. I needed that time to heal, first and foremost, rediscover myself, and redefine what was or could be next for me. More on that later though.

Once back on track in 1996, I applied to Teacher’s College, fulfilling a lifelong dream. Despite being told by a professor on my first day that I would be gone by Christmas, I graduated at the top of my class, and as the first legally blind teacher in Ontario. But then, no one would hire me because of my disability.

I was heartbroken and wanted to give up. I was faced with a choice to resign myself to what appeared to be my fate or hold my head up high and resolve to fight. I realized that I needed to reframe my dream. Perhaps the typical teaching role wasn’t going to work for me, but I could still utilize my skills to help others. In February 2014, I started the charity called Connect 4 Life, and a radio station Voices 4 Ability, to ensure that people with disabilities would have access to education and training to help them maintain their independence and achieve their goals. My incredible team of volunteers and I have helped hundreds of people over the last five years.

No one succeeds without effort. Those who succeed owe their success to their own unwavering belief and perseverance, and that of others who believe in them. I teach life skills and radio broadcasting to people with disabilities. Despite society and the naysayers telling me I couldn’t do it, I recreated my dream to fit my new reality. And you can too. I am so happy and feel that I am making a bigger difference now than I could have as a traditional educator. The awesome thing about dreams is that they are fluid and they change as we do. I realize that those three amazing teachers, who influenced me so greatly, ultimately empowered me to become a role model to others as well.

Aside from the most challenging of circumstances, hold in your heart that you can create your own destiny if you embrace your unique abilities, and accept that your dreams can take on different appearances and still manifest—often in a much more meaningful way than you ever thought possible. Be open to the possibilities and don’t get in your own way.

What have you always wanted to do? Is there something keeping you from it?

Chapter 2

Expectation

I am the eldest of four girls. My parents raised me to be well behaved, and to act as a good example for my younger sisters. It was expected that I would be respectful and try my best at everything I did. My father used to tell my sister Mellissa and I that we should think about being a doctor or lawyer, as these were highly regarded professions. These suggestions were made in passing, but as I child the approval of my parents was very important to me. Naturally, I had it in my mind that I had to excel in school to be successful and to have a rewarding career. Mellissa was a gifted student. She was brilliant and hardly had to pick up a book. Me, I needed to study and be very disciplined with homework to ensure good grades.

In grade eight, when I struggled with math, my parents got a tutor for me for the summer. They also decided it would be best for me to attend a private school to help ensure that I did well and to increase my chances of getting into a good university. Upon reflection, I know this was really helpful in my journey; at the time though I was so upset to leave my friends and actually saw it as a