Stronger With You

By Carol Ann Iaciofano

Trick Sullivan was looking for someone to save him only he didn't know it. He had everything but it wasn't enough. He found himself in trouble and was saved by a guy who promised to change his life. David Bell. David Bell has a daughter who has the ability to change everyone she encounters into a better person. David knew that Jessica, his daug

• Language: English
• Publisher: EC Publishing LLC
• Release date: Oct 22, 2020
• ISBN: 9781970160307

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Copyright © 2020 by Carol Ann Iaciofano.

ISBN 978-1-970160-30-7 Ebook

ISBN 978-1-970160-26-0 Paperback

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Printed in the United States of America

To my family and friends— I love you so much!

Gina, my twin and best friend in the whole world, thank you for the support you always show for my love of writing and creating my stories. I love you!

Mom— you are my inspiration always for being a strong woman.

John-John and Stacy, I want a love like you share!

Joey O — you are my favorite cousin with such fun events that only happen to you. Your pancake story had such an impact on me. I think it bothered me more than it ever bothered you, but I told you I would write about it. I love you. Thank you so much for allowing me to use it…… I love you! Thanks to you and the NITWIT!

Daddy, you are always in my heart

CONTENTS

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

About the Author

CHAPTER 1

He watches me from across a crowded room. He can’t peel his eyes from me no matter how many distractions are around us. There are a lot of distractions. There is a guy standing on a chair reciting lines from Shakespeare. He is doing it poorly. There are people dancing. This is a busy workplace and there is a lot to take notice of. Yet he never takes his eyes off of me. I panic.

I am talking with a group of people. I know that he can’t hear what I am saying to them, but he never stops watching me. I flip my long dark brown hair around my shoulders. I smile at one girl mischievously. When I look up, I catch his eyes on me. I quickly look away and gather my belongings that are scattered around the table. I shove the stuff in my bag quickly not caring how they are in there. I look up and see him watching me still. I grab my stuff and glide my wheelchair in a crowd of people.

He stands with his back to the support wall and continues to watch. He loses sight of me. He picks up his bag at his feet and he leaves the area. Shit! He says. I lost her.

At the end of the work day, I gather my stuff again this time taking the time to make sure that everything is organized in my bag. I put the strap of the bag in my seatbelt. It is after seven and I should have gotten out of work two hours ago.

When I get to the front doors of the building, it’s raining. No. It’s pouring. It’s a dirty rain coming down so hard and fast that the droplets are splattering to the ground and then splashing back up and falling again. I look up at the sky and close my eyes. Shit! I say. My car is parked more than a football field away. There is nothing at all that is going to keep me dry. I push open the door and go as fast as my arms will allow. I take my keys out of my purse. I hit the bottom on the key fob. It doesn’t work. I close my eyes and scream.

I unlock the door by sticking the key into the key whole. I get in the car ever though I know that I shouldn’t. I transfer from my wheelchair to the car and put my right leg in the car. I put the key in the ignition and nothing. Son of a bitch! I yell. I look around frantically. I see that there is an umbrella in the back seat. I take the umbrella and open it. I put it over my wheelchair so that it doesn’t get wetter than it already is. I try the key again and nothing again.

He leaves the building and walks to his car. He hears me crying over the loud rain. He looks around and sees my car in the lot. Its parked diagonally between two spaces because there is no disabled parking spots. The sounds of my sobbing catch him off guard. He looks at his phone in his hand when it alerts ping on his phone. It’s a weather alert calling for light rain. The meteorologists said there would light rain all day. This is beyond a light rain.

He looks and sees that the door is opened. He sees the umbrella sticking out sheltering something. Is that a wheelchair? He asks out loud. It’s her. He says. He hears me crying and runs across the lot. Are you alright?

It’s dead. I cry.

The wheelchair?

No. My car. The fucking thing is dead.

Can I give you a ride? He asks.

I look at him. I recognize him. He is the one that was watching me intently hours ago. I am waiting for roadside assistance.

When will they come?

I don’t know.

Can you call them to check? I will stay with you.

I dropped my phone. It’s under my car.

He looks around and notices that there is a nice size of collective water puddling around my car making it look like my car is an island. Let me see if I can find it. He says. Can you hold my stuff so it doesn’t get soaked?

Of course.

I am Trick. He says.

Trick? That name is familiar to me. I think I know him. Is this him?

Yeah. He runs his hand through his soaked hair.

I am Jess. I say holding out my hand to take his stuff. Here.

He hands it to me and then gets down on the ground to look under my car. He sees the phone and reaches to get it. Trick stands and opens his jacket to dry my ruined phone with his dry shirt. He stuffs it in his pocket. Use mine.

I don’t know the number. I look at him. Can I call my dad?

Anyone you want.

Do you want a towel?

What?

I have towels in my car. Do you want one?

Thank you.

I hand him a towel and take the phone from him. He wraps the towel around his shoulders. I call my dad. My car is dead. I listen to my dad talking. I just left work. I listen again. A guy let me use his phone to call you. I close my eyes and grip the steering wheel. Will you come? No. Fine! I yell. I hand him back the phone. Thank you. I say.

What’s going on?

He can’t come. He is going to rescue my sister across town.

Let me drive you home.

I gather my stuff again and put it on the seat behind me. I attempt to transfer into my wheelchair and it slides. Trick steps quickly behind it and holds it in place. I get it in my wheelchair. He takes the umbrella and holds it over both of us which seems senseless because we are both drenched. I lock the doors of my car.

The sky opens up and Trick takes my hand in his lacing our fingers together. A jolt of electricity surges through me. He walks quickly to his car. He unlocks the doors with his key fob and opens the door. He lifts me out of my wheelchair after he puts my stuff in the car. He sets me on the seat and buckles the seatbelt. Then he puts my wheelchair in the trunk of his car and gets in the car himself. He closes and opens and closes the the umbrella to shake off the water. He passes it to me. He closes the door. Trick puts the key into the ignition and his car purrs to life.

Where are you going? He asks me.

Um… home. I say nervously. I look out the passenger window and catch my reflection in the window. I look back at Trick. Can I ask you a question?

Yes,

Why were you watching me?

I. I wasn’t.

You never stopped watching me. I look down at my hands that I am wringing in my lap. I look at him. Why? Why were you watching me? I hear the panic of my words.

You captured my attention.

Why?

How do I get to your house? He asks.

Go to the stop sign and turn left. At the light turn right. Go the end of the round-about go right and then make a left.

When he gets to the stop sign he stops and looks at me.

What? I ask.

You live in my neighborhood. He looks left and then right before he goes through he intersection. He drives about three blocks and stops at the light. There is no turning at the red light allowed.

Why is your name Trick?

I don’t like Pat. He says as the light turns green. He turns right. He drives down the long street to the the round-about and makes a merge to the right. He turns left on the street where there are houses on both sides of the street.

Ok. I say.

How long have you lived here?

My parents have lived here for ten years. I moved back in with them recently.

You live in my neighborhood and I never see you, but I see you at work.

You weren’t looking for me in the neighborhood.

I wasn’t looking for you at work. He says.

My house is on the left. Right there. I point to the left.

Make a right here? He teases.

No. Left. That’s my house. I smile even though I don’t want to.

He pulls into the driveway. He gets out and gets my wheelchair out of the trunk. The rain has stopped for the moment. I open the door and get in my wheelchair.

The front door of my house bursts open. My two little brothers run out. The younger runs to the end of the sidewalk and looks down the street.

The older stands in front of me. He points his finger at me. Jessica! You are late! He yells.

I turn my head and look at my younger brother. Max! Don’t go in the street. I say to him.

Dylan, my seven year old brother jumps in my arms. He hugs me. You are late! He yells again in my face.

Dylan! My mom yells from the door frame. Get your butt in the house. Who are you yelling at?

He jumps off my lap and runs to the front door. Jessica. He turns to my mom. She is late! He yells.

Get in the house. She yells again. She looks at me. Where’s your car?

In the lot at work. I look at Max who is sitting half on the sidewalk and half on the wet grass. I look back at my mother. I think that Jeff stole my battery again.

Are you joking? She asks rhetorically.

I glare at her. I am in no mood for her bullshit right now.

She looks at Max. Max! Get in the house please. She says.

He looks at her and sits back down on the sidewalk and plays with his wet toes.

My dad pulls in the driveway and parks where I would normally park. He gets out and looks at Trick. You’re in my spot. He yells. He looks at me. Jeff strike again? He asks with a smirk.

Somehow, mom here— I point to her. —and you think Jeff is funny. My chair is soaked. I am drenched. He is stalking me and you take his side. I look at Trick. Thanks for bringing me home.

Have you had dinner? Mom asks.

No. I am going home. Thank you. Trick says.

I will not take no for answer. Mom says.

She’s late! Dylan yells again.

Dylan, shut up! Tammy yells at him.

Dad looks at Tammy. If he cries, you are grounded. He says it calmly. He looks at Trick and me. Lets go inside and you can have dinner.

Every set of eyes focuses on Dylan. I don’t look at him. Dylan scrunches his face and throws himself down on the wet grass kicking his feet.

Now I look at him. Dylan. Get in the house. I say sternly but I never raise my voice.

Dylan looks at me. He stands up and walks into the house. Oh shit! I am in trouble!

I turn to Trick. My family is crazy.

I made Swedish meatballs and spanakopita. Mom says.

I love Swedish meatballs. Trick says. He steps behind me and helps me in the house.

Dad looks at us. Jeff’s clothes are still in the guest room. Dad points down the hall. Second door on the right. He looks at me. I will go get your car.

I’ll drive you. Trick offers.

That’s nice of you. Dad says. But I will tow it home.

Thank you. I say. I watch Trick go into the guest room. I put my stuff down and then go into my room to change.

Trick walks into the guest room. He walks to the closest and pulls the doors opened. He pulls out sweatpants and a shirt. He walks into the joining bathroom. He closes the door and takes his clothes off. He puts the sweatpants on. He puts the shirt on. He gathers his clothes and walks back into the main room.

I am back in the room too. I have changed my clothes too. I am wearing sweatpants and a stripped black and white tank top. My pink sports bra shows. Trick looks at me. He looks me over from head to toe. My hair is in a messy bun and my toes are bare. He continues his perusal and takes note of a tattoo on my chest of two hearts.

Let me get you a bag for your stuff. I say. I leave the room and come back moments later with a plastic grocery bag. I hand it to him.

Thanks. Trick says.

Dylan runs in the room and jumps on the couch. He bounces on it a few time and then launches himself off of it. Trick drops the bag and grabs Dylan before he hits the floor. Again! Dylan yells.

Max covers his ears.

Mom walks over and takes both of their hands in her hands. Say goodnight. She says.

Its not bedtime! Dylan yells.

It is bedtime. Mom says leading them off to their room. She comes back moments later. Dinner is on the table for the two of you. She returns to the boys’ room.

Trick looks at me. I look at him. Come this way. I say to him. He follows me into the kitchen and we sit at the table.

We sit across from each other. Trick picks up the fork. He takes a forkful of food and puts it in his mouth. Oh this is good. He looks at me. Why aren’t you eating?

I am sorry. I say.

What?

Thank you for the ride.

No worries.

I am sorry about my family. I cover my face with my hands. I look at Trick. Dylan has a sensory issue and yells all the time. He is seven. Max is three and he hasn’t found his voice yet. Tammy most likely got kicked out of school again. My parents — well. And Jeff was my boyfriend. We broke up a year ago. He’s not over me. He stalks me.

And your parents like him?

No. They love him.

Tammy walks into the kitchen she takes my plate and scrapes half into a bowl for herself. I am starving. She says.

Get your own. I say.

Come on. You know that you don’t ever eat all your food. Tammy takes the fork and sticks it in her mouth. She then sticks the fork in my food.

Tammy! I snap.

What? She smiles.

Tammy! Mom yells.

Coming. She calls. She takes the bowl and the fork that she stuck on my plate with her when she leaves the room.

I take my plate from the table and dump it all in the garbage.

Want some of mine? Trick asks.

No thank you. You enjoy it. I say. I cut two pieces of the spanakopita and put them on a fresh plate. I offer him one. He takes a piece of it.

Dad walks back in the house. I left your car in the lot. I have to go back and wait for the police. They need you there.

Dad he took the battery. I say.

No. He took the whole engine.

What? I ask.

Dad looks at me. Its true.

Dad, I can’t relocate. I cover my face with my hands again. I told you he was getting worse.

He left something under the hood. Dad says.

I look a dad. Trick jumps up and walks around the table. He puts his arms around me and hugs me. He is protecting me from whatever dad is going to say. In his arms, a familiar feeling overcomes me.

What was under the hood? Trick asks.

I raise my hands to cover my ears. I don’t know that I want to know what he put under the hood of my car.

Dad walks over to me. He sits in the chair next to where I am at the table. He puts his hand on my shoulder. I turn to him and he takes me in his arms.

Is it bad? I whisper.

It is. He says.

Don’t tell me.

Trick looks at my dad. Can I talk to you alone a moment? He asks.

Dad looks at him. I will be right back. He says.

I take the plates off the table and put them in the dishwasher. Tammy comes back into the kitchen. She hands me her bowl. I take it from her and put it in the dishwasher. She steps aside and hugs me. What are you doing? I ask her.

I am sorry about your car.

Dad walks back into the kitchen. Sweetheart, we have to go wait for the police.

I look at him. I don’t want to go. I say.

Where is your cell phone? Dad asks.

I don’t know. I think its still under my car. I dropped it in the puddle when I was getting out of the rain. I didn’t know that Trick still had my phone. Dad, please.

I am sorry, angel. You have to go.

Fine. I say. I look at my dad, Tammy and Trick. I have to change. I say.

Just put a jacket over your tank top. Tammy says. I have the matching jacket to your pants. Don’t be mad.

I knew you had it. I say to her.

She runs out of the room and comes back moments later. She hands it to me. I put it on. I zip it up almost completely. I look at dad. He and Trick exchange looks.

Tammy, stay here. Dad says.

Ok. She says.

I look at her stunned that she’s not fighting him.

She turns quickly and runs from the room.

Dad looks at me. Lets go.

We leave the house and the three of us get into dad’s car. I get in the front seat. I fold my hands in my lap. Trick sits behind me. He puts his hand on my shoulder. Again protectively. I lower my head.

Daddy, please. I whisper.

My dad pulls the car out of the driveway. He puts his hand over my hands.

I cry softly on the way back to work. When we pull into parking lot my car is surrounded by ten police cars.

What’s under the hood? I whisper.

Are you sure you want to know?

Is it a snake? I ask.

No. Dad says. It’s a dead rat.

I squeeze my eyes closed and tears trickle down my cheeks. Why doesn’t he just leave me the fuck alone? I whisper.

It’s all going to work out ok. Trick says.

A police officer approaches the car. Sir, you can’t be here. He tells dad.

That’s my daughter’s car. Dad says.

Pull over there. He points to the opposite end of the lot.

Dad turns the car and parks in the spot that Trick had been in earlier. He puts the car in park. He gets out of the car and gets my wheelchair.

I get of the car and stand up holding on to the door. I tremble with fear. Trick holds my wheelchair. When I sit. He takes my hand.

Who are you? I ask him. Why were you watching me? I look at all the police officers surrounding my car. Is this a dream that I am going to wake up from?

I am Trick. I will answer the other question later. No this is not a dream.

Why is this happening?

A police officer approaches. He and Trick exchange looks. The officer looks at my dad. Who is the car registered to?

Me. I say. I know I look young, but I am twenty-five.

The officer looks at me. Sorry. He says. Do you have the key?

Yes. I say. I hand him my car key.

When did you know there was a problem with the car? He asks me.

When I went to unlock the doors with the key fob. It didn’t work. I stuck the key in the door and unlocked the car. It was pouring. I wanted to get out of the rain. I got in the car and went to start it. Nothing happened.

Did you make any phone calls?

I called for roadside assistance. I say.

Did they ever come? Did they ever get back with you?

I dropped my phone. It went under my car. I don’t know if they ever came.

Did you open the trunk of your car? The officer asks me.

No. I usually don’t use my trunk when I leave work.

What’s inside?

A gym bag.

Can we see?

Of course. I say.

The officer opens the trunk. It is full of black roses. There is a note on top. It reads one word on it. BITCH

The officer comes back over. He and Trick walk away for a second. Dead roses and a note. The officer tells him.

Where is he now? Trick asks.

He turned himself in about twenty minutes ago. The officer says. We don’t feel like she is safe.

I will keep an eye on her.

Does she know who you are?

Not yet. I told her dad.

Keep us posted. The officer says.

I will.

We never found her cell phone.

I have it. Trick says.

Another officer walks over to them. He looks Trick over. What the hell are you wearing?

I had to change. I was drenched. She left work in the downpour. Trick says.

Where is your vehicle?

How long will you hold him? Trick asks.

I am not sure. The officer says to Trick.

Trick looks at me and notices that I searching all around. I am constantly looking over my shoulder. Do I tell her who I am?

Just tell her that you will protect her. The commanding officer tells him.

Trick walks back over to where dad and I are waiting to find out what we do next. Trick and dad again exchange looks. I again pick up on it. Dad’s cell phone rings. He reaches in his pocket.

Hello. He says. Marcia? What? Slow down. What?

I look at my dad. I am scared.

Trick puts his hand on my shoulder and I nearly jump out of my skin. You are safe. He tells me.

Who are you? I ask him.

I will tell you, but not here.

Did you know that he did this?

No.

I can’t relocate again. I say. I already lost my—

My dad ends the call and curses. Everyone looks at him.

What’s wrong? I ask him.

Your sister. Dad yells.

Now what?

I have to go get her.

Trick walks away for a moment and then comes right back. The car is going to be towed. Its going to be impounded. We can go.

I look at my dad. I want to go with you.

No. He says harshly.

I am going with you. I demand.

We get in the car. I sit in the backseat with Trick. Dad drives the car. No one says a word. He pulls the car into a driveway. I will be back with your sister. He says. He slams the door closed. The sound of metal on metal rings through my ears.

Trick looks at me. What’s wrong with your sister?

I close my eyes.

Talk to me. He says.

Who are you?

I asked first. Trick says.

What are you seven? I ask. He puts his arm around me protectively. Who are you?

Tell me whats going with your sister?

I turn away from him.

Shit! He yells. I am a cop.

Am I in trouble?

No. He says.

Then what the hell do you want with me?

I am assigned to protect you.

You failed. I say.

He winces. That’s harsh. He says quietly. Tell me about your sister.

Oh for fuck’s sake. I say.

What is it?

She had a baby about almost three months ago. She didn’t want to give it to the dad to raise but he is keeping the baby. she is seventeen and he is twenty-three.

How does that work out? Why wasn’t he arrested for rape?

He married her.

What?

Just in case my family isn’t fucked up enough. I say. My sister went to go live with our brother. He is two years younger then I am. He is in the military. When he was local, he had us come over a lot. Tammy wound up staying with Evan.

Does your brother know that you are being stalked?

Yes. I look at Trick. Jeff was one of my teachers in college. A chill runs down my spine making me shiver.

Dad comes back to the car with Tammy. She is sobbing. I just wanted to nurse him. She cries. She gets in the car and slams the door.

You are not allowed to be near them. Dad says softly.

I didn’t do anything wrong. She says.

Tammy, you can’t keep trying to see him.

Just let me hold my baby. She cries. She puts her feet on the dashboard and cries into her knees.

You can’t hold the baby. Dad says broken. He looks in the review mirror at me. He puts his finger to his lips. I watch him in the mirror and see that tears roll down his cheeks. I am sorry Tammy. He says.

When dad pulls the car into the driveway, Tammy gets out and runs in the house to my mom who is waiting with open arms. Dad gets my wheelchair out of the car. He looks at Trick.

Protect her. He says.

I will sir. Trick says.

Dad walks in the house and closes the door.

CHAPTER 2

I am in an apartment that is oversized. I have been here for a month. I have a roommate who I hardly see. She leaves early in the morning to go to work. She comes back late at night. She has one side of the apartment and I have the other.

I go in the bathroom and shower. I get dressed. When I leave for work, Trick comes to get me. I smile at him as I approach his car.

You could be happy to see me. He says.

I glare at him.

Look, I know you are mad.

Do you blame me?

No. He says.

I just want to see my family.

I know.

Well can you make it happen?

I am working on it.

Its been a month. I want to see my family.

We have to go to work.

Aren’t you working already? I ask with attitude.

He looks at me.

You want to know what makes me sad about this whole relocation? I ask him. If you even care.

I care. He says.

I hate the silence. My family is loud. I hate not being around people. I want to be around people.

Lets go to work. He says.

Whats going on with my car?

I am working on it. He says. Are you ready for your presentation?

I gave it a co-worker.

Why would you do that?

I just did.

As much as you tell me that you want to be around people, you keep sabotaging being around people.

I am being punished. I say.

No. You are not. He says.

Trick.

Just get in the fucking car. He says.

I look at him. He opens the door. I get inside. I hate this. I say.

I know. He says as he puts my wheelchair in the trunk. You keep telling me. He gets in the car. He pulls out of the parking lot and drives to my parents house. When he pulls in the driveway, I get excited. I couldn’t tell you that I was taking you here. He gets out and gets my wheelchair. He stands next to it as I get in it. Listen, we are not staying long.

I hug him. He stands rigid. Thank you. I say.

Tammy hugs me. I hug her. She holds her hand out so that I see the ring on her left hand. She hugs me gain.

Congratulations. I say.

I get to go live with them. She exclaims.

How did this happen?

Dad and Andrew met with Evan. The baby is getting so big. Becker is already thirteen pounds. She beams.

Lovely. I say evenly.

She kisses me. Do you want to hold the baby?

He’s here?

Andrew is living here. She says.

Oh wonderful. I say. I play her words in my head. She gets to go live with them. Then she said that he lives with them

My mom hugs me. I hug her tight. She hugs Trick. Come in the kitchen. I made food for you both. Mom says.

Thank you. Trick says.

Is there any word on Jeff? I ask.

Mom sits next to me at the table and takes my hand in her hand. He is still missing. She says.

How does anyone know if I am truly safe? I ask.

You are safe. Trick answers.

Safe? I don’t feel safe. How did he disappear?

The police officer transporting him is gone too. It turns out they are friends. Trick says.

I just want to stay here with my parents.

Mom is still holding my hand. She squeezes it. Andrew is using your room.

Why isn’t he using the guest bedroom? I ask.

He is paying rent to have your room.

What happened to all my stuff?

He packed it all up, nicely, and put it in the garage.

I push away from the table.

Where are you going? Mom asks.

To the bathroom. Is that ok or should I go outside? I ask.

She hears the hurt in my voice. Of course you can use the the bathroom.

I leave the kitchen and go down the hall. I slip out of the laundry room door. When I go outside, Andrew is standing on the driveway. He stops me from leaving.

Where are you going?

I was going to make an appointment to visit my stuff.

Hey. He says.

I look at him.

I know you don’t like me.

I never said I don’t like you.

Jess, come off of it. You always act like you don’t like me.

Trick walks outside. Where are you going? He asks me.

I needed to get some air.

Is there no air in the house? Trick asks. Trick looks at Andrew.

Trick this is Andrew. Andrew this is Trick. I say.

They size each other up.

A car pulls into the driveway. My brother Evan gets out of the car. He runs over and hugs me. I hug him. He hugs Andrew next. He sizes up Trick.

Evan, this is Trick. I say.

Trick? Evan asks. Evan recognizes him. He knows who he is. He looks at me surprised that I don’t recognize Trick.

Trick Sullivan. He says taking Evan’s hand and shaking it.

Evan and Andrew exchange looks.

What is that? I ask them. What are you two doing?

They both look at me. They look at him. Don’t you cover important people? Are you covering my sister?

I look at Evan. I don’t know whether to be insulted or flattered. Trick walks closer to me and puts a protective hand on my shoulder.

We are not going to hurt her. Andrew says. She’s my sister-in-law.

At his words my breath catches. I close my eyes and see my self jumping out of my wheelchair and running as fast as an Olympic runner. I open my eyes and look at the three men in front of me.

Trick never takes his eyes off me. We need to go back inside.

Do you think he will strike in daylight? I ask.

Who are we talking about? Andrew asks.

Jeff. I say.

Crazy Jeff? Evan asks.

Yes.

What has he done now? Evan laughs.

You find it funny that he took the engine out of my car and left a dead rat under the hood. He also left three dozen black roses with a note reading ‘bitch’.

What? Dad didn’t tell me that. Evan says.

Andrew looks at me. Where have you been all this time?

You noticed that I haven’t been here? I ask.

Why don’t you like me? Andrew asks.

Let’s go inside. Trick says.

This isn’t my home. I want to go home. I say. Oh wait! I don’t have a home.

You have your apartment near the university where you work. Evan says.

I had to relocate both my job and where I live. I tell him.

Dad didn’t tell me. He says again.

We don’t like to bother you when you are busy with work. I say.

Evan takes me by the hand and pulls me in the house. He is pissed off. I can feel the heat radiating from him. I have one sister who really needs me and my protection and one who is a fucking mom and married. He pushes me in the kitchen. He takes a chair out of the way. Sit! He yells at me. Don’t move!

I am older than you are. I say.

He looks at me. Then act it! He says seething. He leaves the room because Trick and Andrew walk in the kitchen. Stay with her. He looks at me. Don’t let her leave the room.

Andrew sits next to me. Why don’t you like me.

I look at him. I like you. I whisper.

Everyone talks. Mom, Dad, Evan, Tammy, and Andrew. They all decide that I need to come back and live at home with them. Evan and Andrew work security and they call their team members who work with them and decide that there will always be someone with me at all times. If I was going out in public, there would be more than one.

Andrew got on the phone with his uncle and set up an appointment for me to go see cars the next day.

Tammy comes in with Becker and hands him to me. I hold my nephew for the first time. He is dressed in a onesie from the university that I graduated from. I hold him up. It’s nice to meet you. I say to him and kiss him.

Tammy looks at me. Let me get his bottle ready.

I look at my parents. I am not sure me being here is a good idea with the little ones. I wouldn’t want to bring danger to them. To you.

Mom kisses me on the top of my head. I am sorry I didn’t believe you when you told us it was that bad.

I bury my face in my nephew’s tummy. Trick sees the tears that fall from my eyes. No one else does.

~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~

I didn’t tell them the half of it. Jeff found me everywhere at school. At first it was exciting. He would pull me into an alcove and kiss me. I felt important. I felt special. He made me feel extremely special.

Jeff is very handsome and happy most of the time. He made me feel sexy. Until he didn’t. I took a swimming aerobics class and he needlessly showed up for this almost every time. I could do ninety percent of the exercises with everyone. My instructor was fabulous and always had me involved with every activity. If it didn’t work out, she would ask students in the class to help her restructure some of the moves so that I could participate.

After the class, I went into a private bathroom to take a shower and get changed for my next class. I locked the bathroom door and went to the shower. I opened the shower curtain and there was Jeff. He was standing there naked. I screamed and he kissed me. He told me to get back in the shower. I did and he watched me.

I got dressed and left the bathroom with my hair soaking wet. I went to my next class and couldn’t concentrate the whole time. I was lost. I felt like I was drowning in my fears.

I stayed late to tutor two football players. They always walked me to my car when we were done. That night they couldn’t. I assured them that my car was parked in a well lit spot. When I got to my car there was a stuffed kitty cat on it. There were flowers.

~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~

My mom taps my arm and I look at her. Where were you? She asks me.

Um… what?

Where did you just go?

I was just thinking of the past. I say honestly.

She takes the baby from me. Isn’t he beautiful?

He is. I say.

It is only ten in the morning. I push away from the table. Trick watches me. I smile at him.

I yawn.

Are you tired, sweetheart? Mom asks.

I am a little tired. I say.

Go lay down in mine and daddy’s bed. Take a nap.

I can sit on the couch. I say.

Go on. Go in my room. Mom says. "We will wake you in a few hours.

I go in my parents’ room. I get on the bed and within seconds I am sleeping.

Are you lost? He asks me.

No. I say.

Can I give yo a ride? Jeff asks. I wanted to talk to you about your grade.

I have to go to my work-study.

Skip it. He says. I want to show you something. He kisses me.

Get away. I look around us. People will see.

I want you.

I have to go to work. I sign everyone in. They count on me.

Jess. You will be mine soon enough. He says.

I call out. Leave me! Leave me alone.

Trick comes running in the room. The pillows are all thrown to each side of the bed. The blankets are pushed to the side of the bed. I am in a pool of sweat. He sits on the bed and touches my arm.

I open my eyes.

You are safe. He tells me.

I have to go to the bathroom. I say.

Are you really going to the bathroom this time? He asks. He smiles.

Yes. I say. I get in my wheelchair and go into the master bathroom. I leave the door open. I come out. I look at myself in the mirror of my mom’s vanity.

Where did you go when you were holding the baby? Trick asks softly. What triggered it?

I look at him. I just got lost in thought. I say.

Tell me about it. He says. He sits on the sofa in the room. The sofa is on the other side of the room.

I just want to feel safe. I say. I haven’t felt safe in two years.

How did you meet him?

I took one of his classes.

What did he teach?

Literature.

Did you like his class?

Every girl liked his class. I say. I look at myself in the mirror. He made me feel sexy. I say the words so softly. Then he made me feel dirty.

What? Trick says. Trick stands up and walks closer but still keeps a distance between us.

I turn to face him. Who hired you to protect me?

That catches him off guard. I can’t tell you that yet. He says.

Did he hire you? I wring my hands.

No.

Is that the truth? I ask.

Yes.

I have to go to work. I have kids who depend on me being at my job so that they have a safe person to come to.

I can take you to work. He says. How did he lore you?

He showed up everywhere. He knew my schedule. He knew my hang outs. He knew my friends. He knew— I cover my face with my hands.

He knew what? Trick touches my arm.

I feel the heat radiate off him and there is that familiar feeling again. Everything. It was like he wrote the book of my life.

Trick looks at me.

I tried doing things different. I parked in other locations. I changed my classes. I changed how I did things. I pick up a little glass teddy bear that I bought my mom when she came for parents’ weekend. I hold in it in my hand. I was scared all the time. I stayed late to tutor athletes after their practices. I traveled in groups of people. I always had someone walk with me to my car.

I know that you did that at work too. He says.

He still knows when I am going to leave alone. I look at Trick. How does he know that?

My team is looking into how he knows all that he does about you. Especially when your locations on your phone and your iPad are turned off. Your social media doesn’t say where you are or where you work. My team had to do a lot of digging to to find out your routine.

I miss my friends. I say.

Make plans with them.

I look around the room. I go around the room and pick up the pillows. I make the bed. I fix the blankets at the foot of the bed. I busy myself. My friends and I were supposed to go on a staycation.

You aren’t going?

They are.

"You aren’t going?’ He asks again.

No.

Where are they going?

They changed the location and didn’t tell me.

Is that true?

Yes.

I can find out where they are going?

I am not going to crash their vacation. I say. I go back over to my mom’s vanity and pick up the glass teddy bear again. Besides, I don’t have a car to get there or a phone to call them on.

There was a problem with your phone. Trick says.

He knew everything on that phone?

Yes.

What did I do wrong?

He crosses the room and stands in front of me. He takes the teddy bear from me and looks at it. Then he sets it back on the tray it was on. He squats in front of me. You didn’t do anything wrong. He says.

His phone pings with alerts. He stands and walks out of the room.

Evan walks in. He hugs me. You ok?

No. I am hiding from my life. I look at my younger brother. What did I do wrong? I ask him.

You didn’t do anything wrong. He looks at me. We are going to protect you. He hugs me.

We leave the room. We join everyone in the kitchen. Andrew stands up when I come in the room. He moves a chair so that I can join them at the table. Trick is not in the room. I look at my parents. Mom looks sad when she looks at me. Its like she knows that I am struggling.

Max runs over and climbs in my lap. I hug him. I fluff his hair. Hi. I say to him.

He puts his finger on my lips.

I kiss his finger. Hi. I say again. I stick my hand in the air between the two of us. I finger-spell H-I.

He does what I do.

Good, Max. Hi. I say and finger-spell it again. Can you say, hi? I ask him.

He finger-spells it.

I put my right hand to my chin and sign Good. I say it when I sign it. Good, Max.

Dad looks at me. When did you learn sign language?

I have known sign language a long time. I took it in high school. I worked with a few athletes who are deaf.

Not deaf. Tammy says. Hearing impaired. She says.

I look at her. Sorry little one, but they are a hundred percent deaf. I know. I worked with them.

What else did you do with them? She asks.

I glare at her. I look back at Max. Did you have a nice day at school?

He nods his head and smiles brightly.

Good. I say and sign the word.

Dylan runs in the room. Hi! He yells.

Hi Dylan. I say.

You are back! He projects every word.

I am back. I say softly.

Andrew pulls Tammy aside. He laces his fingers with hers and walks into my former bedroom. What the fuck is wrong with you? He asks quietly.

Wh-what? She stammers.

You implied that your sister was sleeping around.

No. No I didn’t.

Yes you did. You implied that your sister slept with the athletes that she tutored. Why would you do that?

Why are you taking her side? Tammy asks.

Andrew scrubs his hands through his hair. Tammy. I don’t know if you realize it or not but your sister is in danger.

Her stupid boyfriend show up again and scare her? She asks.

He takes her by the biceps facing her as he looks in her eyes. Tammy this is very serious.

She always comes first.

Tammy. Andrew says. Let me ask you a question.

Ok. She say.

If you are in danger can you run away from it?

She looks at him. Yes.

Can your sister get away quickly if she had to?

No. She says.

So do you think that she needs to come first? He kisses her passionately on the lips. You come first to me. He kisses her again on the lips. But I am going to work to help protect your sister.

Tammy looks around my old bedroom. This was her room.

I know.

Maybe its just fair if we move into my bedroom and give her back her room.

I think that would be great. Andrew says.

How bad is it? She asks him.

Even if he didn’t do what he what he did and left what he left, he flattened all of her tires.

Why?

He is stalking her.

Why? He broke up with her. Tammy says. I read the emails he sent her.

Do you still have them?

She flushes. Her cheeks turning bight red.

Tammy, if you have them, I need them. He says. I won’t say where I got them from. He kisses her nose.

She runs out of the room and walks into her room. She opens her closet door and gets a box. She runs back into my bedroom and hands the box to Andrew.

Dylan is sitting on my lap. Read to me. He yells.

Dylan, go pick a book. I tell him softly.

Dylan jumps down and runs to the bookshelf. He picks a book and runs back. This one! He yells.

Dylan, can you say that again softer? I ask.

This one! He yells louder.

Ok. This one. I say. I kiss the top of his head. Peter Rabbit? I say.

He nods.

I open the book and read ten pages. He falls asleep on my lap. Dad walks over and picks him up. He carries him off to his room. He comes back and takes Max in his arms. He turns and looks at me. How do I say its bedtime?

I look at my dad. I say and sign, It’s bed time. I put both my hands together and then put them in the side of my face. I lean my head to the side my hands are. Then I point it my watch.

Max smiles at me. He jumps down from dad’s arms and hugs me.

Love you. I say and kiss him.

I sit on the couch with my family and we watch a movie. Tammy picked Mean Girls which seems fitting because she is mean to me. I sit on the couch and relax for the first time in a long time.

Evan sits on the end of the couch watching me more than he watches the movie. Andrew is sitting with Tammy almost on top of him. He moves her aside and gets up. He walks into my room and gets the box. He sends Evan a text message to come into the room. Evan gets up and goes in my old room.

What the hell is that?

Tammy should be a detective. The shit that girl gathered. Andrew says. She makes me proud of her. Andrew gives Evan the box. Listen, I told your sister that I wouldn’t say I got the information from her. There is some legit stuff in there.

I can’t say that I won’t say that I got this from Tammy but right now, I will keep this between us. Evan says.

Where did Trick go?

He brought her home. We can protect her until she has to go out.

I snuggle into the couch and close my eyes. I fall asleep almost immediately. Mom sits next to me running her fingers through my hair like she used to do when I was young. She takes my hair from the root and pulls it lightly through her fingers. When she gets to the end of the strand she tugs on the end.

Do you think that she will be mad when she finds out it was me who hired Trick? Dad asks mom.

No. Mom says. It surprises me that she doesn’t remember who he is.

Let me put her in our bed. Dad says. He lifts me up and carries me into his room. He lays me in the middle of the bed.

Mom comes in and covers me. She puts her finger lightly on my chest on the tattoo just over my heart.

What is the significance? Dad asks.

Mom traces it gently. She looks at dad. Ask her.

She always gets defensive.

Don’t ask her with anger in your tone. Mom smiles.

I will try not to get mad.

Sweetheart, its not her only one.

Dad looks at mom. What? He asks. How many are we talking about?

Three.

"What are the other two?’

Ask her. Mom says.

I roll over. My shirt slides up and dad sees the second tattoo. It’s a large cat that wraps around my side.

A bobcat? Dad asks.

A cougar. Mom says.

Not the same?

Mom laughs.

I stretch my arm while on my side and my dad sees the third one. It’s a sunshine with a big bright smiley face. Underneath it says Not this time

Dad looks at mom. What the hell does that mean?

CHAPTER 3

I sit at my office at work. I feel like I am a goldfish in a glass tank as every one passes by looks in on me. Some people just walk by but others actually look at me to see if I am ok. My boss David isn’t allowing me to leave the office to meet with my clients. I am on desk duty.

My boss’s boss walks over. Kevin comes into my office. How are you doing?

I look up startled. I didn’t see or hear him coming.

I am sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. He says.

I put my hand on my chest. I am ok. I say. I miss my kids. I say.

I know. He sits on the edge of my desk. We have added disabled parking in the front of the building.

I look at him and smile.

Also, there are security cameras overseeing the parking lot. There are guards at all the doors. Kevin says. I am sorry that we didn’t have all these things before.

I don’t know what to say so I don’t say anything. Kevin gets up. He walks to the door and turns back to look at me. I look up. What?

I am working on how you can meet with Jena.

I sit up straighter. What’s going on with Jena?

I have another counselor working with her, but she hasn’t said a word to her. She wants you or she’s going to run.

I look at Kevin. Let me go with a group of people. If I am not alone, I can go. Let me go.

Let me see who can go with you. Kevin says. His phone pings with a text message. He looks at his phone. There is an alert that there is security breech. He looks at me. Don’t leave this office until I come back.

What’s going on? My heart pounds in my ears. Kevin? Is Jeff here?

He looks at me.

Kevin, my office is like a fish tank. I say.

Press the button under your desk. He says.

I give him a puzzled look. He walks a round the desk and shows me.

Press the button. He says.

I press the button and the windows in front of me frost over completely. I can’t contain my smile. I hug him.

Oh.

Thank you. I say.

Close the door. He says.

I hate closed doors. Kevin leaves my office and just before I close the door behind him, Trick slips inside my office.

I look at him. He smiles. He sits in the office chair that always annoys me because I don’t need it in here. I usually put my purse on it and my stuff that I bring with me to work. But since I have started back, I was told that the only thing I can bring is myself. No purse. No phone. I still don’t have a phone.

My car is in the lot. Andrew’s uncle completely fixed my car. Andrew worked with his uncle to get my car better than it was. When they had it on the lift, they found a tracking device. They found that my car was bugged.

Trick sits with his ankles crossed. He looks at me.

How am I supposed to feel safe when you aren’t with me? I ask.

He watches me. I like your office. He says. He stands and takes me in his arms. He hugs me. He straddles the frame of the wheelchair. He kisses me. He pulls back. Is this alright?

This is better than alright. I say. I look at him. Who hired you?

I still can’t tell you. He kisses me again.

Trick, I need a cell phone. What about a burner phone? I need one. I have to be in touch with my clients. One specifically. She needs to be able to get in touch with me.

Ok. He says.

What did you do with my phone?

My boss has it.

Can I get it back?

You have to be patient.

I need it.

What do you need from it?

My life is on that phone. I say to him. I look at him. Did he leave me a message? I close my eyes tight.

Yes. He whispers.

Was it bad?

It was graphic. His phone pings. He digs his phone out of his pocket. He reads the message. He holds the phone out for me to see it. ARREST MADE ALL CLEAR

I let my breath out that I have been holding. I have to go to the bathroom. I say.

Trick goes with me to the bathroom. He stands by the counter as I go into the stall and do my thing. I come out and wash my hands. He opens the door for me and we both leave the bathroom.

Want to gather your stuff. He asks.

I have nothing. They told me I wasn’t allowed to bring anything with me.

What?

They told me it was for my own safety. I say. I look at Trick. Will they hold him this time?

Yes. Trick says. His phone pings again with another message.

This one is from Andrew and my brother in a group message. He reads the text messages from them.

Even: Are you with her?

Andrew: Is she safe?

He answers their messages with a yes.

Evan: Jeff was arrested. He was shot. Not dead. He wants to talk to Jess. We are going to talk to him first. How is she?"

Trick: She amazes me. She seems scared for a minute, closes her eyes and when she opens them, she is pure sunshine.

I look at Trick. What’s going on?

Jeff was shot. He is not dying. He wants to see you.

My hands tremble.

I will be with you. I will never leave you. Lets get to the bottom of this.

He can’t hurt me? I ask.

You are safe. Trick tells me. He kisses my lips. Your brother is going to be there. Andrew and me. Plus my team is going to be nearby.

Who hired you? I ask.

He kisses me. I can’t tell you.

We leave my office. Kevin and David hug me before I leave.

Kevin looks at the security guard. They both watch as I leave the office. I get in my car. Trick’s car is parked rows away from my car but he gets inside.

I look at him. Where are I going?

North hospital. He says.

I drive my car in the opposite direction of my parents’ house. I pull into the parking lot of the biggest hospital in the area. I park my car in the front in a disabled parking spot. The second that my car is in park and I open my door, my brother hugs me.

I don’t want to go in there. I say.

You don’t have to. Andrew says.

We need answers. Trick says. "You have to go