Awareness

By Rowan Shannigan

Waking in the hospital after a car accident nearly claims her life is a serious jolt to Rebecca, a sixteen-year-old with a promising future. Learning she has been there for over a week is pretty nerve-wracking as well. But that isn’t what really bothers her. No, what’s really bothering her is her newfound ability to see shadows no on

• Language: English
• Publisher: Gypsy Shadow Publishing
• Release date: Mar 6, 2020
• ISBN: 9781619503908

Rowan Shannigan

Rowan Shannigan has always harbored a deep fascination for the paranormal. She believes in Ghosts! She believes Angels watch over us. She knows Demons stalk us and she really wishes Elves were around to be yummy and heroic when we need them for inspiration! Rowan lives in Texas with her son and her very own Soul Mate. Her house is filled to the brim with love and laughter, not to mention a few ghosts here and there. Oh, and more than just a few cats! You can't forget the cats! Awareness and Sensations are Rowan's first Young Adult novels, with one more book planned out for this, the Awakening Awareness series. She also writes Romance for adults under the pen name of Shiloh Darke.

Book preview

Contents

Copyright Page

Dedication

Foreword

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Preview of Sensation, Book Two of the Series

About the Author

Awareness

Book One of the Awakening Awareness series

by

Rowan Shannigan

All rights reserved

Copyright © August 2011, Rowan Shannigan

Cover Art and Illustrations Copyright © 2011, Charlotte Holley

Gypsy Shadow Publishing

Lockhart, TX

www.gypsyshadow.com

Names, characters and incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher.

No part of this book may be reproduced or shared by any electronic or mechanical means, including but not limited to printing, file sharing, and email, without prior written permission from Gypsy Shadow Publishing.

ISBN: 978-1-61950-390-8

Published in the United States of America

First eBook Edition: August 10, 2011

Dedication

This story is filled with fantasy—Fairies and Elves, as well as beings from the realm of possibilities—ghosts and Angels and demons. This book is dedicated to everyone who believes in those possibilities. It is written for anyone who has reached out in the dark, and felt the touch of someone no one else sees reaching back.

The people we love never really leave us. They are all around us, watching over us and sharing all our secrets with God; as if any secrets exist that the Great One doesn’t already know. Sometimes the spirits around us need our help to find the light. Other times they’ve already been to the beyond and just want to come back and be near when they feel we may need their love. After all, the truth is: Spirits are among us… and they reach out to us whenever we open our minds and hearts enough to listen… to hear and to become Aware of their presence.

Foreword

In life, three definite things will happen. First, you will age, for you cannot stop time. It is the circle of a clock, and it never stops, nor will it move back. Of course, that doesn’t mean you won’t try to hold back time. Some people just try more drastic measures than others—tummy tucks, collagen injections, face lifts, all kinds of implants… the list goes on.

Second, you will hurt someone you love. No matter how hard you try to spare a person’s feelings, at least once—or, on the off-chance you really are human—several times you will break someone’s heart. The sooner you accept this truth about yourself, the sooner you can just get ready to learn how to suck it up and tell others you are sorry. Believe me; it really isn’t that hard to say.

And third; you will die. It doesn’t matter what your personal beliefs are. You can be Jewish, Christian, Buddhist, a monk from Mongolia who has sworn a vow of silence and hasn’t broken it in fifty years, or even an Atheist who likes to believe nothing else is out there besides this one glorious moment, and it all ends when you’re gone.

Some people die, but then they come back. Now, these people may look the same, talk the same and even have the same beliefs they always did before. From the moment they come back into their bodies… they are different. A change has occurred. A certain Awareness has come into play. It cannot be shut off or ignored. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Where was I?

Oh, yes… Now, of course a myriad of other things will happen in life, but many of them can be, and sometimes are, avoided. But aging, hurting those you love and dying? Nope, you just cannot run from them. You’re better off not to even try. It is useless, and a complete waste of your time.

Speaking of wasting your time… since I know what I’m saying here, let me just cut to the chase. If you are safe inside your little cocoon of disbelief, then stop reading this NOW. I don’t want to intrude on your reality. I would HATE to shake you up by challenging you to let your safe little world out of the incredibly small box you feel secure in.

However, if you have felt someone watching you when no one visible is there; if you hear voices no one else is Aware of, or if you see transparent people… Yes, I said transparent people, but anyway… yeah, if you have experienced anything along these lines, then you just may want to keep reading.

When He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth;

John 16:31

Chapter One—Voices

Voices… the first thing I remembered hearing when I woke up in the hospital that morning. I was confused and disoriented. My mother sat perched near me with a worried expression on her face, but all I could do was take everything in.

I was lying in a bed with tubes connected to me. Shadows danced along the pristine walls, but had no apparent point of origin. Who did the shadows belong to?

Voices; hundreds of voices whispered all around me, however I saw no physical body for any of them. My heart sped up as I looked around, trying to make sense of it all. Surely I was going crazy. I had no other explanation for it, though.

My inner musings were interrupted when the doctor entered and greeted me with a smile. Well, look at you! All bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.

I glanced from the doctor to my mother and back again. What’s going on? I asked in a voice that was hoarse from disuse. Why am I here?

Mother leaned forward and took my hand. Baby, you were in a car accident. You’ve been unconscious for six days. Tears welled in her eyes. I’ve been so worried.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in my throat, I whispered. Is everyone else okay?

Squeezing my hand, Mom nodded. You were the only one who had to come here. Everyone else went home that first day.

Thank God, I responded, closing my eyes. When I opened them, a woman was standing just to the left of my mother, looking down at me with a curious expression.

Then, just as fast as she had appeared, she vanished. I blinked and reached up to rub my eyes, trying to clear them of the days of crusty sleep that had built up in the corners. Surely I was seeing things. How bad were my injuries? Did I have a concussion?

So, what’s wrong with me? When do I get to go home? I asked quietly.

The doctor smiled. Well, I’m keeping you for a little longer, just to make sure your head injury is truly on the mend. That said, I think we can probably let you go home in time for the weekend.

When he spoke, a shadow raced past him, drawing my attention as it stopped abruptly and turned toward me. As I watched, it moved closer and a face took shape.

The boy looked me over intently before offering me a lopsided grin. Don’t tell him you see me, or they’ll transfer you to the State Hospital, just as sure as I’m floating around.

He glanced over toward my mom and the doctor, adding, They’re watching. You need to tell them your head’s hurting and ask them to turn down the lights. Glancing back at me, he clicked his tongue. Trust me. Do it now!

Without even thinking, I turned and covered my eyes with my hands. I’m sorry. The lights hurt my eyes. Can we turn them off?

The doctor nodded. Of course; you have a couple of hours until lunch. Why don’t you try to get some more sleep? Turning to my mother, he smiled. She seems to be in the clear now. I’ll be back to check on her later.

She offered him tears of gratitude, and I watched, feeling pretty overwhelmed. I wondered silently how close I had actually been to dying.

Oh, you were close, the boy said. "They’ve been in and out of here for days."

I looked back at the boy, who had now materialized completely to stand beside me. He couldn’t have been any older than twelve, but he seemed very with it. Glancing over, I saw my mother standing at the door, talking to the doctor still, so I could respond with no worry of being overheard.

Looking back at the boy, I asked quietly, They? Who are they?

He looked from me to my mother, then back at me. "Okay, two rules. One: you don’t talk to me. I can hear your thoughts. You don’t want just anyone seeing you talking to things they can’t see. They’ll think you’re crazy. He smiled. And second: don’t ask questions you aren’t prepared to hear the answers for."

He chuckled. I’ll come back tonight after your mom goes home. It’ll be easier for you to understand me and not freak her out by talking to imaginary friends she probably can’t accept. He smiled and reached to touch my arm, but stopped, holding his hand just inches from my skin.

Fascinated, I watched as the hair on my arm directly below his hand stood straight up. A chill ran through me, making me shiver. I could feel him. But I knew he had no physical body.

He stepped back. Just don’t freak out at what you see today. The things you see here in the daylight won’t hurt you. I’ll explain when I come back tonight.

With those few wise words, he vanished, exactly like the woman who’d been standing beside Mom earlier had. To say I was shaken would have been an understatement. This went beyond anything I’d ever imagined possible.

Well, baby girl, it looks like you’ll be coming home soon, Mom said as she moved back to take the seat beside my bed. That’s wonderful.

I turned to smile at her. Yeah, I answered. That’s good. And it was. I just wasn’t sure this other thing was good. How could I tell her about that? I mean, I was seeing ghosts. Wasn’t I? How was that even possible?

Or maybe I had just hit my head so hard this was all still a hallucination and I only thought I was awake! Yeah. That sounded like the better option. It was a heck of a lot easier to believe than the version of ghosts, disembodied voices, and shadows dancing all over the walls. I mean, move over, space cadet… Psycho in ward three!

Okay, so ghosts were real. All right, I could buy that. I mean, it was actually pretty cool… in a really weird, spooky, don’t-tell-anyone kind of way. Now, they didn’t need to talk to me. I mean, no way was I going to continue seeing them. I could refuse. Couldn’t I?

I was soon to learn just how impossible it would be to ignore the spirits that float around us every single day of our lives. I was also about to learn the plans I had been making for my life were no longer an option.

Chapter Two—Ghosts and Angels

Later that night, my mother kissed me goodbye and promised to be back early in the morning. I had to clasp my hands together to keep from grabbing her and begging her not to leave me. I didn’t want to be alone. Yet I was too old to act like a baby.

It was just all too crazy. I wasn’t prepared to handle it with people all around me during the daylight. How the hell was I supposed to handle it at night with no one—no one alive, that is—here?

Biting my tongue, I waved goodbye as she walked out the door. Then, I counted. One-one-thousand, two-one thousand, three… nothing. Maybe I had only been hallucinating. Nope, I had just quit counting too soon.

Hi there! Miss me? His voice almost made me jump completely out of the bed.

Gasping, I turned to look at the boy I had seen earlier, now perched precariously at the foot of the mattress. Don’t do that! I growled. You scared my heart half out of my chest!

He tilted his head, considering my words and looking at the vicinity around my heart. Still looks like it’s beating in place to me.

I fought the urge to throw my pillow at him. Instead, I tried the calm, I-don’t-believe-in-you approach. You are a figment of my imagination. I am going to sleep now and you… I grumbled, pointing at him, … are going to go invade someone else’s nightmares.

He actually looked insulted. Hey! he pointed back, I’m here to give you a quick lesson. You had better be nice, because I’m not going to help you at all if you’re gonna act like that!

I groaned, shaking my head. "You are not real! I hit my head and I am just hallucinating! I pointed, wagging my finger at him. I don’t need a lesson. I need to get some sleep so tomorrow they’ll decide they can let me go home. I rolled my eyes. You’re younger than me anyway. What could you possibly teach me?"

He crossed his arms in front of his chest. I happen to have died back in nineteen eighty-two, he said with a smirk. That makes me older than you on so many levels!

I stared at him in a mixture of stunned silence and growing panic. This was not happening! I couldn’t be sitting here in a hospital room, talking to a ghost who died before I was born! I had been born in ‘ninety-three. I was sixteen. This ghost died eleven years before I was even born. No! I refused to do the math! I hate math.

Instead, I shook my head. That doesn’t mean anything. You died when you were younger than me. So, you are eternally younger than I am.

It was his turn to roll eyes. Oh brother. Chick, you are so frazzle-headed. He sighed, hopping off the end of the bed, and moving to sit in the chair beside me instead. Look, I’m sorry I can’t just throw off the kid personification and look like some gorgeous hunk you might take halfway seriously. The fact is: I was chosen to show you what to expect. He held up his hand to stop me when I opened my mouth. "I don’t know why they chose me. They just did."

He hunched his shoulders and slipped down into the chair, looking up at the television, which had been left on. Bart Simpson was playing some trick on his sister. "I wish they’d bring back Fantasy Island. Now that was T.V. worth watching," he mumbled, shaking his head.

Baffled, I formed an O with my mouth, before recovering. "What’s Fantasy Island?"

He glanced at me from the corner of his eye and smirked. Well, obviously it was before your time.

Now, I’d like to say I really didn’t give a damn. It meant nothing to me that I could see ghosts. I wasn’t that kid from Sixth Sense, and I would NEVER tell anyone, Hey! Guess what? I see dead people. That just wasn’t happening.

Of course, like anyone would know, I couldn’t help myself; I was curious. Okay, so explain it to me then. I’m listening. Maybe it would just be a fast explanation and then it would be over. I would be free to move on with my life. Please let me move on with my life!

He looked at me for a few minutes, and then sat up in the chair. I nearly laughed in spite of myself when his feet didn’t touch the ground. I mean, how do you take a prepubescent ghost seriously when he can’t even put his feet on the ground in an adult-sized chair?

Now, you need to understand. Normally, you wouldn’t see me, he stated simply.

Nah, really? I cut in with my usual snide humor. I would’ve laughed, but the look he gave me made me think better of it.

Luckily, he continued, instead of chastising me for interrupting. Since the kind of accident you had was nearly fatal, the veil has been lifted, and you’ve come back with a certain… He paused, as if searching for the right word. Then he smiled and continued, "… Awareness."

I frowned at him, absently playing with the sheet on my bed. When he didn’t immediately continue his story, I queried, So what? Is it permanent?

He nodded. I’m afraid so. Once a person’s veil has been lifted, it can’t simply be slid back into place. A change occurs, and there is no fixing it.

This was NOT what I wanted to hear. You can’t be serious! I don’t want to be like this. How will I ever fit in with my friends again? I pouted, raising my voice without thinking.

He brought his finger to his lips, shushing me. Only after I’d been quiet for almost a full minute did he answer. Did you ever consider maybe instead of fitting in, you were meant to stand out?

Huffing angrily, I muttered. I hadn’t considered much else past getting an apartment after graduation next year and applying to colleges. As soon as I’d spoken, images of ghosts following me through the college halls floated through my mind and I sat up, panicking.

No! I reached for him but my hand only closed on empty air. There has to be a way to get rid of this. I-I can’t function like this!

The boy sat back in the chair, looking me over worriedly. Girl, you honestly don’t have a clue, do you? Ghosts, he chuckled humorlessly as he gestured to himself, are just the tip of the iceberg here. He crossed his arms over his chest again. You haven’t even seen the rest yet.

Deflated, I fell back against the headboard. There’s more? Oh, whichever Angel might be closest, please help me. I had to have lost my mind. That was the only sane answer.

If I had thought ghosts were beyond the realm of sanity, then I knew no way of coming to terms with what came next. I mean, come on! Just because I called out to an Angel didn’t mean I actually wanted one to appear!

That’s all right, Mark. I’ll take it from here, a deep male voice interrupted softly.

Turning toward the voice I dropped my jaw when a guy that looked closer to my age, with shoulder length blond hair, dark blue eyes and huge white wings stepped out of the shadows. I would have screamed, if I hadn’t been interrupted by the boy who had been sitting in the chair.

Well, I tried, Zeke. She just isn’t open to accepting it yet. He stopped and looked back at me accusingly, lowering his voice. I know the Big Guy never makes a mistake, but do you think He didn’t think this one through?

Zeke continued making eye contact with me and smiled at the boy’s question. Of course He did, Marky. He always has a plan.

Mark huffed and rolled his eyes. Well, I’m glad He has a plan, because I’m a little short on faith for this one.

Looking from the Angel guy to Mark, I stuck my tongue out. Who had asked him, anyway? I was still pretty sure