Loving Dulzura

By Siol

When their mother’s accidental death changes the family’s dynamics due to her affair, twins Cheyenne and Cayenne are left to be raised by their father. The girls—once close—relationship shuts down, and one twin begins to despise the other as they grow older suffering their loss and emotional aftermath from their mother’s death.

Sibling rivalry consumes Cayenne to the point where she makes the decision to exclude her sister through bullying, scorn, rejection; stifling her peer companionships and socialization. On the other hand, Cheyenne takes the high road and is perceived to be the good girl and daddy’s little tomboy princess. But she is lonely. Cheyenne finds herself holding favor by excelling athletically and academically in order to occupy herself and cope with the loss of her sister’s and mother’s love.

Reaching adulthood, Cheyenne becomes an attractive woman. But she finds no justice. Friendships are fake and pointless until she encounters Dr. Juli Washington who is smitten with her.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu Publishing Services
• Release date: Apr 17, 2015
• ISBN: 9781483425870

Book preview

Dedication

Wanting a Taste of Sweetness

Finding that unique and sweet taste …

is treasured … held dear … and savored.

A favored contentment …

embedding memories, and lazy smiles …

beyond bruising, pain, and stain.

Pure satisfaction … my love … my yen.

—Siol

CHAPTER 1

Driven

C heyenne ended her internal conflict and conceded that there were no other job offers but the one before her: prime three-day, twelve-hour shifts with General. Previously, she had thought that a nurse with a current license, solid references, and an outstanding background check would easily land a job without issue. It hadn’t really crossed her mind that the downtrodden economy plaguing every company and institution with cutbacks would affect the medical field so drastically. Hospitals around the university just weren’t hiring. Student nurses floated around, easing the staffing crunch, and PRNs were expensive. With cutbacks now the norm, Cheyenne couldn’t secure hours anywhere near campus. Grudgingly, she revised her plans, deciding to return home for the summer and commute for her fall semester.

Cheyenne felt defeated. Caving to her father’s suggestion, she begrudgingly settled. General’s reputation—close to the bottom on the list of hospitals on the East Coast—wasn’t the issue. The issue was the sheer nearness of her twin Cayenne, who also worked at the facility. It’s going to be a trying four months, she thought, but at least it’s a steady paycheck. For Cheyenne, the most pressing issue and necessity was to find a way to pay her bills.

She convinced herself that, after two years of peace, being so close to her sister was a small sacrifice to make if she wanted to graduate. She also wanted to move as far away from the metropolitan area as possible. The only benefit the job afforded her (outside of her pay) was the accommodations for her school schedule.

General, a gray-brick monstrosity located conveniently near a major fairway, provided a far run of business. With only a hundred beds, it was a small hospital situated on the outskirts of the city’s metropolitan neighborhood. Absent modern features like its sister hospitals, it was often described as a warehouse with a parking lot encasing its primary entrance. A sign designated the building as a hospital; in most people’s minds, it was tagged for probable demolition.

During her interview with Caroline, the medical-surgical care coordinator, Cheyenne weighed the consequences and chose not to divulge her sister’s presence at the same facility. If hired, she wouldn’t be working in the same department as Cayenne, so she didn’t think it should be a factor in the hiring decision. Although they were not identical twins, most people figured out the connection. Cheyenne hoped that their miserable relationship would remain on a professional level; she also hoped that it would be nonexistent within the boundaries of the hospital.

Caroline hired Cheyenne to cut back on the numerous callouts she’d suffered on the weekends. Once the pre-employment paperwork was completed, Caroline gave Cheyenne a tour of the hospital, ending with an introduction to the hospital administrator, Texas Thibodeaux, who was excited to meet Cheyenne. Enthralled and imprisoned by the beauty presented before him, he readily agreed to allow Cheyenne to compile data for her dissertation if needed, as long as she met the provisions specified.

Although extremely pleased that Caroline made arrangements for her to meet Thibodeaux, Cheyenne was relieved that the introduction occurred under Caroline’s supervision. Cheyenne became immediately leery of Thibodeaux. His roaming eyes affirmed his character, giving him away as he salivated with greed. He was as subtle as a sly fox hunting for prey. Cheyenne forced herself to focus during their initial introduction; with professional confidence, she ignored his behavior. Considering her life was devoid of social interactions outside of church and her job as bar hostess and waitress, Cheyenne was sharp. She knew his kind.

CHAPTER 2

Honoring Father

A fter she returned home following her interview, Cheyenne was reminded of how grateful she was that their father had turned his three-story home into three separate apartments. He was determined to do all he could to keep peace and prevent his daughters from suffering in today’s economy.

Because she was out of school first, Cayenne had received first choice—the top floor. Cheyenne’s apartment was in the basement, with their father in between on the first floor. Each apartment had a private entrance, allowing all residents much-needed privacy.

Cheyenne took the responsibility to spoil and keep her father fed over the two-week orientation period, and it was well-deserved. He’d worked hard to provide and care for them. She was only doing what any caring daughter should do. It warmed her heart to see his contentment and peace. He was happy that this daughter in particular was home. It pleased him that Cheyenne appreciated the sacrifices he’d made for them. It was the closest to old times he could get.

Cheyenne found the time to be with him. She kept him entertained and helped him with projects in and around the house. She did, however, draw the line when it came to doing anything in Cayenne’s apartment.

When his wife, their mother, passed, their father was sullen and broken. For a two-week period after her death, he drifted in a drunken rage. When he came out of it and discovered how sincere his remaining family and friends were, he was determined not to abandon his girls again.

It was amazing to him how many wanted to borrow money or be gifted things after her passing. His wife wasn’t dead an hour before opportunistic pirates swarmed his home, taking her clothing and valuables without asking. He didn’t care about the clothes; the girls couldn’t wear them. He confiscated the little jewelry his wife owned for his daughters. When his wife’s relatives found out the details surrounding her death, they blamed him. Humiliated to be discovered whoring with her husband’s brother, she tried to crush her shame—with a gun. When the truth around her accidental death became public, he was humiliated.

After a two-week binge of sulking and drinking, he sobered up, regained his pride, and accepted the challenge of raising his daughters by himself. He provided for his daughters, making sure they had what was needed. Being frugal, he did not spoil his girls by always giving them what they wanted. He was confident that financially he would be able to provide for them on his one income.

Cheyenne wanted her independence and freedom. She hated that she had to burst her father’s bubble. She had to be honest with him with her plans to move as far from the metro area as she could, as soon as she could. She was determined to have the better quality of life. She wanted him to understand that she was tired, that she needed to leave to live her life, and not succumb to anyone’s shadow. She was also determined not to become Cayenne’s convenient scapegoat. Her father knew the relationship with her twin was so volatile that professional counseling did nothing to repair the severed bond.

In order to qualify for the family discount, they both had to attend the same university, but they both understood the practicality. After Cayenne finished the radiology program in two years, Cheyenne welcomed the coming two years of peace, when she would not have to live in her sister’s shadow. Tutoring afforded Cheyenne a couple of friends; however, they drifted once they siphoned enough information to pass the class. Once she realized that these friends were only using her for her smarts, to pass a particular class, these shallow people cut and scarred her heart like her sister. Cheyenne was too fine to ignore, so other women didn’t want her around for fear their boyfriends would drop them and chase her instead; their intent obviously proved the same old game. To protect her heart, Cheyenne had no choice but to withdraw and keep many at arm’s length.

CHAPTER 3

Attraction

U ntil the grand rounds symposium, orientation brought Cheyenne to the highest peak of boredom. While observing those desperate to impress, she was at least amused by a few nerdy residents, each overbearing and eager to display their annoying and near-genius intelligence. Their zealousness was shot down many times, to allow the timid ones to have their due. The lead doctor often became annoyed by their cockiness. He toed a taut line to maintain patient integrity.

In this session, Cheyenne was privy to the details, attending a case study led by Doctors Juli Washington and Zebedee Dawadi. The one and only Dr. Juli Washington had women around the hospital in revolution. The buzz—that he was single and drop-dead gorgeous—was true. Nurses in the session were goggling, not paying attention. Cheyenne found him off the charts as well and found herself daydreaming about him during the sessions. Her mind raced with an interlude that was pleasurable and mind-swirling. Dr. Washington was tall with dark hair tapered slightly longer from the crown of his head to the nape. He was clean-shaven and had magnificent, piercing blue-gray eyes. His build and athletic physique filled out his suit handsomely. He was breathtaking.

Reluctantly redirecting her thoughts back to the conference, Cheyenne picked up that a few of the residents, lost in their evaluation and assessment of patients, were saved by Dr. Washington. He helped them restructure their approach, to gain the information needed for a positive outcome. Concentrating on the subject at hand challenged Cheyenne, but she pushed herself to remain focused as much as she could. Somewhere during his presentation, she caught that the nursing aspect would be a focus as well.

Juli, mesmerized by this awesome beauty attending this session, wanted to know her name. He’d watched her throughout the grand rounds and was pressed to find a reason to ask. Beautiful wasn’t quite the word for her; this woman was naturally gorgeous. She was, he also realized, more striking than her sister, Cayenne, who had failed in her attempts of throwing herself at him. Cheyenne’s delicately peach skin was complemented by her mixed brown and blonde mane. At twenty-five, Cheyenne possessed youthful facial features on a diamond-shaped face. In how quickly she averted her enticing eyes, he sensed a shyness and innocence. He’d assessed her trim figure, ample yet understated bust, and well-portioned, curvaceous body to be similar to a seasoned model. He was witness to Cheyenne turning many heads within the confines of the room. He could tell she was graceful yet modest.

Toward the end of the session, Dr. Washington asked for introductions of the students. In this way, he could find out the name of the stunning jewel before him. He asked them to share their names, their department, roles, and endeavors.

Cheyenne found herself on edge as her time came. At her turn, she stood, but before she could begin, Juli was annoyed by what he saw and heard from her peers. They mumbled and glared at her as they scoured Cheyenne up and down with their jealous eyes. Heads jerked with the look from the back row of nurses.

Quiet, please! Juli demanded. He was appalled at the rudeness that was displayed. Please proceed, he asked Cheyenne.

My name is Cheyenne Blackwell. I’m stationed on the med-surg unit as an RN. She finished and moved to sit down. She was embarrassed by their display and tucked her head downward, wanting to get out of the limelight. Her face flushed.

Before you sit, Ms. Blackwell, what are your endeavors?

I’m sorry, I forgot. I usually don’t speak of them, she said timidly. It causes too many problems. I am currently seeking my doctorate in psychology with hopes of meeting this goal in December. That is, if I am able to complete my dissertation on time.

Well congratulations, I know you will accomplish this. What is your dissertation? Juli asked, intrigued.

The recovery process of rape in relation to age, gender, and psychosocial development.

If you need help on agencies to develop your research, let me know, Juli offered.

Cheyenne thanked him and sat down. She was happy that she managed to deliver the information that was asked of her without stuttering. She’d instilled an interest and desire in Juli, not only intellectually but emotionally and physically. He wanted desperately to know her better. He’d also noticed there were no rings on her finger. His eyes took her in and caressed her as she spoke.

Cheyenne felt the heat radiating between them as well. Dropping her guard, she found herself momentarily lost. Her heart rate increased; her body heated. Overwhelmed, she drew her eyes down in an effort to refocus. Even though she found him enchanting, she was determined to not blithely become a harlot.

For the rest of the two weeks, Cheyenne managed to fade into the background amid all the hustle and bustle of hospital life. She evaded Cynthi’s questions on most occasions; she knew by rumors that Cythni was a conduit to her sister and one of the lead gossips. Luckily, even on lunch breaks, Cheyenne didn’t run into Cayenne. Her sister didn’t even become aware of Cheyenne’s employment at the hospital until she escorted a patient to radiology. Cynthi assumed that Cayenne already knew.

Well, I’ll be damned! Cayenne croaked loudly.

Cynthi’s head jutted back, Good morning to you too!

Forgive my manners, Cynthi, Cayenne squawked. It’s the ghost behind you.

Much love, Sis, Cheyenne said coolly, acting like she didn’t know that she worked there. I guess I managed to become employed in the same hospital as you.

Wow! Seems like you two get along well, Cynthi belted, missing an attempt to quell the fire. Even though Cynthi and Cayenne hung out and gossiped frequently, she never knew of the blatant animosity Cayenne held toward her sister. Cynthi noted as Cheyenne stayed focused with the patient in hand, ignoring her sister’s demeanor, that Cayenne’s face was in a snarl. Cynthi wondered how these two could have lived in the same household. It didn’t take a genius to see that they had issues. Cynthi saw that Cheyenne was a knockout, with all the features of a sought-after model, while Cayenne lacked. Cayenne’s look was rougher; her face was devoid of charm. Cynthi had witnessed how Cayenne lived life for her own amusement, and there was no mistaking that her friend liked to get high. You could see it in her appearance and grooming. Cayenne’s illicit drug use was evident to all; her teeth had begun to separate from her irritated gums. Still, Cayenne possessed a certain beauty (in her own way), but nothing when compared to Cheyenne. Cynthi wondered if this was the basis of her animosity toward her sister.

For the week, Cynthi observed Cheyenne. She found her to be down-to-earth. She didn’t wear makeup, and she dressed in plain scrubs. Cheyenne, the epitome of a professional and a nurse, always wore her hair pulled back, either in a bun or ponytail. The scrubs played down her curves. But on the day Cheyenne came in wearing a dress, a nursing uniform from church, she certainly caught Dr. Washington’s eye. He was mesmerized and absorbed. Cynthi also noticed that Cheyenne was genuine, joyful, and almost angelic in her demeanor. It radiated from her soul. People noticed this as soon as they engaged her in conversation. The patients loved her. When Cheyenne said, Love you much, to her sister, Cynthi sensed her tone. Cheyenne did not speak with malice. Cynthi suspected that even though it was not received warmly, Cheyenne seemed to love her sister. This made Cynthi envious. She would have delivered a few choice words, but it was difficult to speak good words to an enemy (and she was sure that Cayenne would insist that she consider Cheyenne to be her enemy too).

Cayenne, call when Ms. Fields is ready to return to the floor, Cynthi said to redirect Cayenne’s attention. She seemed to be momentarily lost in anger.

No problem, Cayenne muttered as she directed the stretcher in the room. Cheyenne walked away before Cynthi could respond. In this way, she let them both know that she didn’t have anything else to say on the subject of her employment. She also wanted to make it clear that she was not going to put up with her sister’s attitude. Cheyenne needed this job, and she was not going to lower herself to her sister’s standards. She’d rather let Cayenne blow it for herself. She felt ashamed that even on the first encounter she had with her sister on the job, Cayenne offered her no respect and chose to belittle her.

Tolerate it for four months, Cheyenne, she told herself as she walked to the elevator with Cynthi, You need the money to move!

Seeking confirmation to what she’d just witnessed, Cynthi commented, "Wow! I thought she was your sister."

Cheyenne said nothing. As benign as this seemed, it pissed Cynthi off that Cheyenne did not respond to her observation; the chill did not sit well with her. She thought about sending Cheyenne to face her sister again whenever she called for patient pickup.

Cheyenne didn’t do cliques. She didn’t depend on anyone. Almost immediately, she decided that she wasn’t going to let Cynthi draw her in to more drama at work. She didn’t consider herself a nerd. She knew that she wasn’t socially inept; it was just the way she approached her goals. She’d learned many lessons. It was depressing and lonely, but she stuck to her convictions; it was better to be lonely than bullied, Cayenne’s approach to relationships did not sit well with her. She was jealous, ruthless, and vengeful when crossed. Cayenne had poisoned many of her sister’s relationships over the years. Inevitably, Cayenne would interfere wherever she could and sabotage her sister’s friendships. As a result, Cheyenne cherished the love she received from her father and the attention from a few acquaintances at school and professors, people who admired her diligence and encouraged her to stay on course. This fulfilled her social needs for the time being, but like most, she yearned for a relationship with that special someone.

Mentally, Cheyenne retreated; she did not have interest in frivolous people. She made a habit of removing herself from caustic situations. Because she did not engage in their rhetoric, many considered her a pale-yellow bitch. It was maddening that most of the degradation she faced came from members of her own ethnicity. She didn’t understand so much of it.

Why do women put each other down so much? Should she destroy what God had created and given her? Sometimes it was hard for Cheyenne to keep her quiet when others disrupted the inner peace that she strained to maintain. Her strength and faith came from an omnipotent power who graced her (in abundance) during tough times. Her beauty was not only physical; it burst from the depths of her soul and was reflected in her smile and unselfish deeds. But it was rare when someone noticed that part of her; all they saw was her external beauty. For these reasons and more, she was determined to not fall prey to evilness.

The haunting of the disturbed was one of the reasons she’d chose to study psychology. Trying to ascertain their intent or what made them tick fascinated her. Cheyenne was strong enough not to allow the attacks of others, especially her sister’s treachery and bullying, take root in her own soul. Cheyenne had seen firsthand how pain carried over into relationships. She acknowledged that her sister was who she was, and Cheyenne chose not let the sourness dwell. She’d looked beyond it and studied it. Confident that she could rise above all the drama and turmoil her sister and others brushed against her, she worked to block the world’s negativity from her space.

Later that day, Cheyenne went down to Radiology with Bianca, a Hispanic nursing assistant, to pick up her patient. Cheyenne and Bianca were acquainted. Compared to many of the females she’d met in her two weeks at the hospital, Bianca was pleasant enough. They were assigned lunch together a couple of times and seemed to synch.

Cynthi’s gabbing, saying that you and your sister don’t get along, Bianca commented.

I didn’t tell her that, Cheyenne replied. She just figured it out by my sister’s attitude when she saw me.

Don’t trust Cythni, Bianca advised.

Oh?

Big mouth. Keeps malarkey going, Bianca reported. When that Dr. Washington scoped you the other day, she nearly shit. You should have seen the scowl on her face.

Seriously?

Everybody wants that!

Letting Bianca know that she was not immune to the doctor’s many charms, Cheyenne said, Yep. Fine eye candy, isn’t he?

They both laughed.

Cheyenne and Bianca followed the radiology receptionist’s directions to the patient holding area, but there was no one there to greet them. They looked around but couldn’t find anyone on staff to talk to.

I can’t believe they left this confused woman in this stall by herself, Cheyenne said.

They crazy in this place! Some of these nurses don’t give a shit! They’d rather spend most of their time huddled in gossip, Bianca added.

Well, I do. Do we just sign her out?

Let me see if anyone is back there.

Bianca walked past the row of stalls and headed to the back offices. Not seeing anyone, she tried looking in the X-ray rooms. Bianca stopped suddenly, unable to believe what she was seeing. She motioned with her hands for Cheyenne to come look. Cheyenne angled behind Bianca and peered into the room. She too was astonished at what she saw: her sister, Thibodeaux, and Piscopo engaged in a steamy ménage à trois.

Your sister is really out there, Bianca whispered.

Now you see why our relationship is estranged. She has no discretion whatsoever. Cheyenne shook her head in disgust. Then it hit her: she knew that she truly made the wrong decision in working here. She should’ve taken her chances and hung on to her side job at the club.

Retreating back so she could not be seen, Cheyenne walked away hanging her head. Her sister’s life was out of control. She really hoped that she wouldn’t be judged based on her sister’s actions at work.

CHAPTER 4

Thorn in My Side

F rom her apartment in the basement, Cheyenne heard her door slam at the top of the stairs. Cayenne’s fury was evident. Cheyenne turned the oven off, concerned that her sister’s impending arrival would cause her to burn the dinner she was making for her father and herself. She waited as Cayenne stomped down the steps. She knew that her sister wouldn’t knock; it would be too polite for her.

As predicted, Cayenne entered without knocking. She screamed, You couldn’t fucking find another place to work? You asshole!

Does it really matter? It’s not like I work in the same department as you. I’m not in your face or in your business! Cheyenne quipped as she turned and met her sister’s wrath.

"I see you here. I don’t need to see or smell you there!" Cayenne yelled.

I know that’s right! Cheyenne thought.

Their father opened the door. Girls! Just stop it. What’s the problem? What are the two of you at each other about anyway? You’re too old to bicker like this. Cayenne, you have no business barging in her apartment anyway! He paused and caught his breath. Sorry, Cheyenne, I left it unlocked when I was down here earlier.

Whenever their father intervened, his approach bothered Cheyenne. He seemed blind to the fact that Cayenne was always the instigator. Cheyenne hated his approach, but she never said anything to him about it.

"No problem, Dad; this is your house. Besides, it doesn’t really matter if the door was locked or not. In