FALL IN LOVE WITH AN ASSASSIN

By Danila Trapani

My heart was still beating.
I thought I would have died the same day; under the debris of my car covered in blood, my hand locked into hers… Instead no!
I was still alive maybe because my devilish side was stronger than my mortal one, or maybe because hell wasn’t ready to welcome me yet. I had experienced death a thousand times, and I had always overcome it. Even now, I felt as if I had once again experienced the icy flames of hell.
I didn’t remember immediately what had happened, but slowly I put the pieces together in my mind, and everything was clear.
The infection by now had spread throughout my body, and I had taken control of my mortal side confusing and inebriating myself.
My story is written in blood.
I think I will never be forgiven for what I did because I, for first, can’t forgive myself. I’m sure you think I’m a disgusting person; a psycho killer. And you are right because I am this kind of person and even more. But everything I have done has brought me to a crossroad between hell and paradise, and now I know for sure which path I want to take.
Don’t judge me; just listen.
My story doesn’t certainly narrate pity and compassion, but now I know how little of my past belongs to me. I realized too late the true meaning of the word ‘love’ and, perhaps, now there is no more hope for me.
Allow me, the child of Death, to tell you my story.
Allow me to tell you how I sold my soul to the devil, just to be with her.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Trapani Danila
• Release date: Jul 1, 2020
• ISBN: 9788835858287

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Prologue

My heart was still beating.

I thought I would have died the same day; under the debris of my car covered in blood, my hand locked into hers… Instead no!

I was still alive maybe because my devilish side was stronger than my mortal one, or maybe because hell wasn ’ t ready to welcome me yet. I had experienced death a thousand times, and I had always overcome it. Even now, I felt as if I had once again experienced the icy flames of hell.

I didn ’ t remember immediately what had happened, but slowly I put the pieces together in my mind, and everything was clear.

The infection by now had spread throughout my body, and I had taken control of my mortal side confusing and inebriating myself.

My story is written in blood.

I think I will never be forgiven for what I did because I, for first, can ’ t forgive myself. I ’ m sure you think I ’ m a disgusting person; a psycho killer. And you are right because I am this kind of person and even more. But everything I have done has brought me to a crossroad between hell and paradise, and now I know for sure which path I want to take.

Don ’ t judge me; just listen.

My story doesn ’ t certainly narrate pity and compassion, but now I know how little of my past belongs to me. I realized too late the true meaning of the word ‘ love ’ and, perhaps, now there is no more hope for me.

Allow me, the child of Death, to tell you my story.

Allow me to tell you how I sold my soul to the devil, just to be with her.

Chapter one

Belle walked into the cold and static room. There was metal everywhere; the glass wall faced out the interrogation room. She saw her reflection in the glass; her arms folded and wearing a red jacket and a white shirt.

She couldn ’ t stand the way she was forced to dress for work, but if she wanted to keep her job, she had to accept small compromises. Besides, she felt less stared at by men when she wore a shirt. Now instead of staring at her cleavage, they just looked at her when passing by. She suspected that sooner or later she would do something she would regret.

Sam walked in and, without saying a word, he stood behind her. Then a fifty years old man, escorted by his lawyer, and the chief of police walked into the room. The interrogation began, and Belle concentrated only on that. She knew very well that Sam was staring at her; she could see his reflection in the glass. She shifted her weight to her other leg, making a delicate noise with her heel.

The man approached her brushing his body against hers.

Today I have to work till evening. Do you want to keep me company? He asked her.

Belle knew very well that now she had a lot of time on her hands in the afternoon because she had finished her studies, and staying at home, wasting time would have driven her crazy. Spending her afternoon with Sam, ignoring how madly in love he was with her, would have taken her mind off of things. Besides, other than his incomprehensible attraction for her, Sam was cute and funny. He made her laugh.

Yes she replied.

When the questioning had finished, the inspector walked into the room.

So Miss D ’ Aragona fill me in.

The suspect put his hands on his face a few times when he answered the questions about his location at the time of the homicide. He started sweating the very moment the questions began, and his lower lip was trembling while he was listening to the first questions and as if he was preparing an adequate answer. If he is not guilty, he is lying to you to either protect someone or out to fear, because he doesn ’ t want to be involved in something that doesn ’ t concern him. But he will give in soon, inspector. He will not withstand another ten minutes of questioning, and then he will confess she told him.

The inspector listened carefully and was glad that he had hired a neo-graduate specialized in criminology. He went back in without saying a word. It was as if Belle had foreseen the future with a crystal ball, because after a few minutes the man confessed that he had witnessed the homicide by mistake and did not want to talk because he was afraid that he would have been ‘ punished ’ after leaving the district.

The inspector should brush up on the basic rules before proceeding a questioning if he demands any suspect to talk said Belle looking at her reflection in the mirror.

Sam stood with his arms folded next to her, listening to what she had said. He had a thoughtful expression on his face; she could see his reflection on the glass. What do you mean? He asked her.

If the inspector wants a suspect to talk, he has to try to put himself on his same level she explained. The inspector should sit in front of him, or better yet next to him. If he just stands there, the only thing he is going to get is fear and submission. Sometimes your approach, the tone of your voice and the way you move your body can make a difference. These are all things you learn in your first semester she concluded.

Sam took her explanation as a personal challenge. He moved closer to her and lowered his voice: So, if I speak using this voice tone, you must not contradict me! He said with a low, hoarse voice. Belle burst into laughter, putting her hand on her mouth in order not to be heard.

Sam, you are as always ridiculous! She told him elbowing him softly on his side, his weak spot.

He burst into laughter too, but he couldn ’ t stop because the nudge she gave him only made him laugh more.

Once he finished his shift, she went back to her apartment. The property owner had never seen her and she knew no one except for a couple of neighbors. For all she cared, it was better this way. Being invisible was good for her.

She left her apartment wearing a tracksuit, holding an Mp3 player and headed for the nearby woods. Half an hour the way and half an hour on the way back.

She turned on her Mp3 player when she entered the delimited area and started running following the path, which she had discovered a few days before. It was by no means well frequented, and in the four days she had gone there, she could have come across, more or less two students. Knowing that she was the only person there, in the middle of those enormous trees, made her feel good and tranquil. She had also discovered an abandoned picnic area, which was quite nice. She would sometimes bring a book with her and studied at one of the wooden tables.

Even that day no one was there.

Nikolaj also thought the same thing. The wood was beautiful just because no one was there. No one had ever been there. No one until that very moment.

Nikolaj froze when he saw a shadow moving between thick trunks of the wood. He couldn ’ t make out whom it was. He continued running, putting on his hood and got closer to the shadow. The closer he got, the more he understood it was a girl. She had long brown hair tied up in a ponytail; she pulled out her Mp3 player from her backpack and put on her earphones, her cheeks and lips were red; the girl ’ s forehead was shiny, and she was catching her breath leaning on the wood table in the abandoned camping area.

He felt a sharp pain in his stomach when the girl turned around and glimpsed her chocolate colored eyes; they sparked and shone, despite the sun rays couldn ’ t pass through the thick green and yellow foliage of the centennial trees.

He learned on one of the trees so that he wouldn ’ t be seen and tried to understand why he had that sharp pain. He had never felt that kind of pain before. It was as if someone had stabbed him on his stomach. He began to breathe deeply and felt much better. An image of his mission appeared before his eyes, and suddenly those chocolate colored eyes vanished from his mind.

The man started walking, taking breaths while he observed closely, from the corner of his eyes, that the girl hadn ’ t either seen him nor heard him because she was wearing the earphones. When she turned around though and saw him, Nikolaj felt the same pain again sucking in his guts. He rubbed his hand on his stomach trying to find the exact point, but couldn ’ t. The girl began walking in the same direction. Now they were practically opposite each other. Nikolaj adjusted his hood on his head and was glad he hadn ’ t shaver his beard because part of his face couldn ’ t be seen.

The only think Belle could see was his large, thick lips framed by his beard and two light colored eyes, which scrutinized under the black hood. She had never seen him before. Not even in the city that was quite small. She kept on walking hoping the man would go away so she could go back, doing her business, but when he stood in front of her, Belle sidestepped to the left to avoid him, and the man did the same, then she sidestepped to the right and the man did the same again.

She sidestepped from the right and the man to the left as if they were in front of a mirror. Suddenly, Belle came to a halt. She burst out laughing, breaking what had seemed to be a grave matter. The man smiled but continued to hide part of his face under the hood. Belle could only see his white teeth under his wrinkly lips.

After you he told her standing still so that she could pass.

Belle wriggled out to the side; her legs were shaking but she overtook him. Thank you she told him.

The man nodded and, without looking at her, started running again.

Belle felt like a fool. She just stood there staring at his back as if she expected he would have introduced himself.

She opened and closed her eyes a couple of times puzzled, figuring out that the man apparently did not intend to play « the sidestep » game with her.

Nikolaj knew well that the girl was standing behind him just before he started running again.

He could have stayed, but that pain had become unbearable when she burst out laughing. It was as if she drilled a hole in his stomach. Now that she was far away from him, the pain weakened. As if that girl was a substance capable of provoking a painful internal allergy.

The girl continued on her way, and Nikolaj went towards his car. He drove to his house, and after taking a long, cold shower, he sat in front of his computer to go through, once again, the prearranged plan which he had been working on with his ‘ client ’ for a long time. In his line of achievement, nothing was left to chance. Every detail was essential, even the most insignificant and tiniest. If he hadn ’ t dealt whit things like an astute chess player, the ‘ mission ’ would have failed.

He was well known in his line of job. He was the best. Everyone wanted to hire his services because he was fast, neat and clean. He was the subject of discussion for the most influential people, and if he first worked for anyone, now his only clients were of high rank. All those people whose suspicion and credibility was essential for their job. Lawyers, doctors, politicians. The politicians were without a doubt the worst and even the ones who guaranteed him a salary fit for a king.

Assassin, murder, criminal, killer: they defined him in many ways; they called him many names and knew about him under myriad points of view except for his real name.

However, he simply defined himself as the ‘ destined. ’

Destined to kill, the one deciding who lives and who dies.

Destined to witness life vanish from his sight.

Doomed to hell and as powerful as Lucifer.

The God of Death.

The devil of life.

Chapter two

It was already evening when Sam arrived at the Rocciosa Marea miner ’ s villa. Belle sprang out from a corner and slid into the police car. Sam looked elegant in his police uniform. With a dazzling smile, started the car and took off. He drove around the city many times, driving twenty kilometers per hour and checking out the street corners and paths. She didn ’ t like talking about herself, and then again there wasn ’ t much to say and the little that there was, Belle didn ’ t care to spread it out either.

There will be a manifestation tomorrow where some of the most important European Leaders will be presented and not only this he said at a certain point. It is a very important manifestation he explained, but Belle wasn ’ t staring at him. Instead, her gaze remained fixated, staring out of the window. She knew that if he was beating about the bush, he wanted to arrive at a crucial point.

I was told to patrol the streets and pay attention to any suspicious ’ faces Sam continued sniggering. Then he pulled over and started staring at her: Would you like to come with me? He asked. As soon as I finish my patrol, I ’ ll take you out for lunch. "

Yes, Sammy she answered.

He felt a chill go up to his spine as she uttered his name with such sweetness. She was the only one who could call him « Sammy » ; only her and no one else.

It ’ ll be fun Belle whispered, but suddenly the mysterious man whit the blue eyes, who laughingly stared at her under his frizzy beard, popped up in her mind. She smiled when she remembered what a fool she made out of herself. It was one of those comic and weird scenes from a film.

It was almost late evening when Sam finished his patrol. It didn ’ t bother Belle at all; she didn ’ t have to go to work. Sam pulled over to the same place where Belle had got in to say good-bye.

I can take you home if you want he proposed.

Don ’ t worry, Sam she said. She didn ’ t want Sam to know where she lived; otherwise, he would be standing at her doorstep anytime he could. She got out of the car and started walking towards the path where cars couldn ’ t transit.

Her apartment, in the dark cold evening, was no means welcoming. She felt as she was still at university. Someone knocked at the door just before she got undressed.

She opened the door and a girl, in pajamas and messy hair, was standing at her doorstep.

How did it go today? She asked.

Belle let her in, closing the door behind her. Well, Giò. Sam never gives up, but I like keeping him company she answered.

Give that poor guy a break Giò tried to soften her.

I don ’ t want him to suffer lied Belle.

Maybe you need to know him better.

Maybe I don ’ t want to know him better Belle clarified. Why are you still up? She asked and got undressed, putting on her pajamas while Giò continued talking without taking breaths.

There ’ s a party at the Poseidon tomorrow night. A band from Catania will be playing there and girls get free. Some friends of mine and I are going and I thought maybe you would like to come too. I can not wait for tomorrow night! I don ’ t know what I ’ m going to wear! Shit! I have to buy a dress!

Your happiness always surprises me, Giò Belle confessed finding her ridiculous and overly excited about nothing.

Maybe Belle; or maybe it ’ s you that can ’ t find what truly makes you happy she retorted. But you ’ re coming tomorrow, it ’ s already been decided. She opened the door before Belle could say anything.

A dress and heels! She ordered and closed the door while Belle was ready to give her a sarcastic answer.

Belle collapsed on her bed, feeling a bit jealous of some of her peers ’ carefreeness. She sometimes wanted to be like them, but perhaps being aware of life ’ s miseries made her live with a more critical and opened spirit. She sometimes felt older than her age and some thoughts made her feel sad and put on weight to carry on her back.

Even that night she couldn ’ t sleep. When she did finally fall asleep, she found herself there…

There was a bad smell of mud and rainy humid air in arrival.

Those black eyes stared at her from above and were more real than ever. Too real; as if she wasn ’ t just dreaming. She could smell the awful odor of the wet soil mixed with fresh blood and feel well the roughness of those large fingers on her face.

She twisted and turned over and over again, sweating waking up, turning and sweating again. She got up, started pacing in the room and went near the window. The street was empty at that hour of the night. There were no cars parked. No bikes or motorcycles. By now, everyone walked because of the heat. She imagined that street filled with cars in winter; she thought about her friends; she missed them even if they kept in touch, but it wasn ’ t the same thing. They were scattered throughout Sicily.

She was still pacing in her room when she realized it was dawn. She wasn ’ t tired.

She decided to tire herself. Therefore, she put on her tracksuit and went jogging to keep her mind off those black eyes. She got her mp3 player and went out into the fresh morning air.

She ran along the dirt road, which was got lost amongst wet green grass. She found an unimaginable comfort in smelling the odor of the damp soil without even envisioning those callous hands. She understood that it was just a dream. A nightmare. As usual, really.

She did some stretching exercises holding on the wooden parapet in the picnic area where the day before she made a fool out of herself whit the mysterious man. She saw him pop out from behind some tree trunks. She couldn ’ t believe her eyes. She subbed them to make sure she wasn ’ t dreaming: of all the people live in the neighborhood, he was the one to bump into at that moment. She was petrified. Belle thought she wouldn ’ t have encountered anyone at that time of day: she was there only because she had one hour at her disposal to go jogging, considering that she had agreed to accompany Sam to the manifestation that day.

She couldn ’ t have known Nikolaj did it for the same reason. A jog before starting a new mission kept him awake all day and gave him the strength to finish the job as best as he could.

Nikolaj was surprised when he saw the girl pop out from the picnic area again. For a moment, he felt angry because he wasn ’ t alone in the wood. He didn ’ t like meeting the same people more than once. He didn ’ t want people to recognize him and get a good look at his face.

He felt the weight of his knife under his belt and, for a moment, he felt persecuted by the girl who couldn ’ t even in the slightest suspect who he was and what he was preparing to do.

He jogged passed her but couldn ’ t help staring at her. Even the girl was staring at him out of the corner of her eyes; she stopped doing her stretching exercises, taking on incurious position while he passed. Their eyes met for just a second and Nikolaj felt that same pain on his lower abdomen again. However, for a moment he thought that those chocolate colored eyes were the reason why he felt bad. As if they had infected him with some strange substance, which was circulating throughout his body.

Belle felt relieved when the man ran past her without spotting. She felt embarrassed by the coincidence and sensed that there was a bit of resentment in the man ’ s eyes, as if he had expected to find no one there at that hour of the morning.

Belle blasted the volume on her mp3 player, breathing in the fresh air and letting herself go to the music. She allowed herself to be transported like a wave bashing against a rock. The rhythm invaded all her muscles, making the necessary adrenaline circulate her body so that she could face another jog around the wood.

Nikolaj stopped behind a tree, pretending to catch his breath, but Belle didn ’ t see him. He protruded observing her in hiding and noticing how perfect her body was. He hid back behind the tree, worried about his thought that had crossed him like a train.

He took in a deep breath and stared at her again sticking his head out from behind the tree. The girl put her hands on her hair, brushing it away from her shoulders and throwing her head back; while he observed her arching her back and shaking that light hair in the air, suddenly Nikolaj noticed that he had never observed a woman or girl the way he was doing in that moment.

He grabbed his camera from his shoulder bag and focused it on the girl from behind the tree. He stared at her from behind the lens and zoomed in as much as possible. He knew very well the type of pictures that were in the camera. He had taken them a few days before for a ‘ client ’ and checked them that morning before going out so that he could memorize the faces on the photographs.

He snapped the first pictures but the camera didn ’ t make a sound. Then he snapped another and another.

The girl took off her sweat jacket leaving her only with a black tank top and her hair on her shoulders. Nikolaj quickly snapped another picture, taking a magnificent close-up of her. Then the girl protruded to a side to fix her hair and Nikolaj snapped away as if he couldn ’ t control at his finger.

Belle stretched, leaving her hair to caress her shoulder and back freely. She left harmonious and dynamic melody to take her away and couldn ’ t imagine how sad she would have felt if she hadn ’ t taken her mp3 player with her.

Certainly, she couldn ’ t have imagined what the man was doing a full photo shooting of her. Nikolaj had lost track of how many photos he had taken from her. He forced himself to put the camera down and check the time.

He decided it was time to go and definitively prepare and headed towards his car. He would have looked at those pictures later, but knowing that he had them, those images of her, consoled him as if he had found a cure for his illness.

He felt as if he had entrapped the virus in those snapshots.

Perhaps he could have experimented an antidote.

Chapter three

I ’ m going on patrol Sam told her. He kissed her on the cheek before Belle even noticed, because he knew very well that she would have stopped him.

Belle felt her face flush while she was touching the check he had kissed, like a child. Sam went down and Belle watched him pass the crowd that surrounded the town hall of Campo d ’ Oro, situated exactly in the center of Sicily, known for its elegance, luxury and high cost of living. Before disappearing in the crowd, Sam turned around smiling and giggling about Belle ’ s unsuccessful attempt to avoid Sam kissing her.

Political meeting, manifestation, theatrical shows performed by well-known companies