The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England: A Tale of the Great Invasion
()
About this ebook
P. G. Wodehouse
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse (1881-1975) was an English author. Though he was named after his godfather, the author was not a fan of his name and more commonly went by P.G Wodehouse. Known for his comedic work, Wodehouse created reoccurring characters that became a beloved staple of his literature. Though most of his work was set in London, Wodehouse also spent a fair amount of time in the United States. Much of his work was converted into an “American” version, and he wrote a series of Broadway musicals that helped lead to the development of the American musical. P.G Wodehouse’s eclectic and prolific canon of work both in Europe and America developed him to be one of the most widely read humorists of the 20th century.
Read more from P. G. Wodehouse
A Wodehouse Bestiary: Vintage Animal Tales from the World-Renowned Humorist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Man Upstairs: And Other Stories Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5P. G. Wodehouse: The Complete Works Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Fore!: The Best of Wodehouse on Golf Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Little Nugget Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Money For Nothing Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Piccadilly Jim Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Carry On, Jeeves Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The P.G. Wodehouse Collection Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Adventures of Sally Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Clicking of Cuthbert Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mike Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSomething New Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Love Among the Chickens Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Carry On, Jeeves Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Inimitable Jeeves Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The P.G. Wodehouse Collection Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England
Related ebooks
The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England: A Tale of the Great Invasion Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Mystery of the Four Fingers Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Swoop Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England: A Tale of the Great Invasion Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Swoop! or How Clarence Saved England Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, August 22, 1917 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCourage, True Hearts Sailing in Search of Fortune Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Trail of the Hawk: A Comedy of the Seriousness of Life Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Volume 152, May 2, 1917 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPercy F. Westerman – The Complete Collection Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEnemy Within Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 150, March 8, 1916 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Vol. CL, April 26, 1916 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, January 5th, 1895 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Mandarin's Fan Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe King of Schnorrers - Grotesques and Fantasies: With a Chapter From English Humorists of To-day by J. A. Hammerton Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Armourer's Prentices Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Silence of Colonel Bramble Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, June 18, 1919 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Flying Stars And Other Stories: “I am not absentminded. It is the presence of mind that makes me unaware of everything else.” Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPenrod Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI, Libertine Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Arthur Conan Doyle: The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 146, April 15, 1914 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, September 12, 1917 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPunch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, September 12, 1917 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEwan Colin Coupar and a Touch of the Fae Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsNotes and Queries, Number 61, December 28, 1850 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMost Secret Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 150, June 7, 1916 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
General Fiction For You
The Covenant of Water (Oprah's Book Club) Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Priory of the Orange Tree Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The City of Dreaming Books Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A Man Called Ove: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Fellowship Of The Ring: Being the First Part of The Lord of the Rings Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Cloud Cuckoo Land: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Shantaram: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Labyrinth of Dreaming Books: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Unhoneymooners Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Candy House: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dante's Divine Comedy: Inferno Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Life of Pi: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Nettle & Bone Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Dark Tower I: The Gunslinger Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Babel: Or the Necessity of Violence: An Arcane History of the Oxford Translators' Revolution Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It Ends with Us: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Ocean at the End of the Lane: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything's Fine Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ulysses: With linked Table of Contents Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Silmarillion Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5You: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Jackal, Jackal: Tales of the Dark and Fantastic Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Canterbury Tales Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Iliad of Homer Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Cabin at the End of the World: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Meditations: Complete and Unabridged Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Pet Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Beyond Good and Evil Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Nineteen Claws and a Black Bird: Stories Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England - P. G. Wodehouse
P. G. Wodehouse
The Swoop! or, How Clarence Saved England: A Tale of the Great Invasion
Published by Good Press, 2022
goodpress@okpublishing.info
EAN 4057664167903
Table of Contents
PREFACE
P. G. WODEHOUSE.
Part One
Chapter 1 — AN ENGLISH BOY'S HOME
Chapter 2 — THE INVADERS
Chapter 3 — ENGLAND'S PERIL
Chapter 4 — WHAT ENGLAND THOUGHT OF IT
Chapter 5 — THE GERMANS REACH LONDON
Chapter 6 — THE BOMBARDMENT OF LONDON
Chapter 7 — A CONFERENCE OF THE POWERS
Part Two
Chapter 1 — IN THE BOY SCOUTS' CAMP
Chapter 2 — AN IMPORTANT ENGAGEMENT
Chapter 3 — A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE SITUATION
Chapter 4 — CLARENCE HEARS IMPORTANT NEWS
Chapter 5 — SEEDS OF DISCORD
Chapter 6 — THE BOMB-SHELL
Chapter 7 — THE BIRD
Chapter 8 — THE MEETING AT THE SCOTCH STORES
Chapter 9 — THE GREAT BATTLE
Chapter 10 — THE TRIUMPH OF ENGLAND
Chapter 11 — CLARENCE—THE LAST PHASE
PREFACE
Table of Contents
It may be thought by some that in the pages which follow I have painted in too lurid colours the horrors of a foreign invasion of England. Realism in art, it may be argued, can be carried too far. I prefer to think that the majority of my readers will acquit me of a desire to be unduly sensational. It is necessary that England should be roused to a sense of her peril, and only by setting down without flinching the probable results of an invasion can this be done. This story, I may mention, has been written and published purely from a feeling of patriotism and duty. Mr. Alston Rivers' sensitive soul will be jarred to its foundations if it is a financial success. So will mine. But in a time of national danger we feel that the risk must be taken. After all, at the worst, it is a small sacrifice to make for our country.
P. G. WODEHOUSE.
Table of Contents
The Bomb-Proof Shelter, London, W.
Part One
Table of Contents
Chapter 1 — AN ENGLISH BOY'S HOME
Table of Contents
August the First, 19—
Clarence Chugwater looked around him with a frown, and gritted his teeth.
England—my England!
he moaned.
Clarence was a sturdy lad of some fourteen summers. He was neatly, but not gaudily, dressed in a flat-brimmed hat, a coloured handkerchief, a flannel shirt, a bunch of ribbons, a haversack, football shorts, brown boots, a whistle, and a hockey-stick. He was, in fact, one of General Baden-Powell's Boy Scouts.
Scan him closely. Do not dismiss him with a passing glance; for you are looking at the Boy of Destiny, at Clarence MacAndrew Chugwater, who saved England.
To-day those features are familiar to all. Everyone has seen the Chugwater Column in Aldwych, the equestrian statue in Chugwater Road (formerly Piccadilly), and the picture-postcards in the stationers' windows. That bulging forehead, distended with useful information; that massive chin; those eyes, gleaming behind their spectacles; that tout ensemble; that je ne sais quoi.
In a word, Clarence!
He could do everything that the Boy Scout must learn to do. He could low like a bull. He could gurgle like a wood-pigeon. He could imitate the cry of the turnip in order to deceive rabbits. He could smile and whistle simultaneously in accordance with Rule 8 (and only those who have tried this know how difficult it is). He could spoor, fell trees, tell the character from the boot-sole, and fling the squaler. He did all these things well, but what he was really best at was flinging the squaler.
Clarence, on this sultry August afternoon, was tensely occupied tracking the family cat across the dining-room carpet by its foot-prints. Glancing up for a moment, he caught sight of the other members of the family.
England, my England!
he moaned.
It was indeed a sight to extract tears of blood from any Boy Scout. The table had been moved back against the wall, and in the cleared space Mr. Chugwater, whose duty it was to have set an example to his children, was playing diabolo. Beside him, engrossed in cup-and-ball, was his wife. Reggie Chugwater, the eldest son, the heir, the hope of the house, was reading the cricket news in an early edition of the evening paper. Horace, his brother, was playing pop-in-taw with his sister Grace and Grace's fiance, Ralph Peabody. Alice, the other Miss Chugwater, was mending a Badminton racquet.
Not a single member of that family was practising with the rifle, or drilling, or learning to make bandages.
Clarence groaned.
If you can't play without snorting like that, my boy,
said Mr. Chugwater, a little irritably, you must find some other game. You made me jump just as I was going to beat my record.
Talking of records,
said Reggie, Fry's on his way to his eighth successive century. If he goes on like this, Lancashire will win the championship.
I thought he was playing for Somerset,
said Horace.
That was a fortnight ago. You ought to keep up to date in an important subject like cricket.
Once more Clarence snorted bitterly.
"I'm