My Weirder-est School #2: Miss Porter Is Out of Order!

By Dan Gutman and Jim Paillot

With more than 30 million books sold, the My Weird School series really gets kids reading! 

In this second book in the My Weirder-est School series, A.J. and his friends are getting a substitute.

Miss Porter isn’t your average teacher, though. She’s a Personal Digital Assistant that literally knows everything. She can tell a million hundred weird jokes and get pizza delivered by drone in seconds!

But what happens when Miss Porter’s system is no longer set to fun? Will anyone be able to shut her down before she takes over Ella Mentry?

Perfect for reluctant readers and all kids hungry for funny school stories, Dan Gutman’s hugely popular My Weird School chapter book series has something for everyone. Don’t miss the hilarious adventures of A.J. and the gang!

• Language: English
• Publisher: HarperCollins
• Release date: Jun 18, 2019
• ISBN: 9780062691064

Dan Gutman

Dan Gutman is the New York Times bestselling author of the Genius Files series; the Baseball Card Adventure series, which has sold more than 1.5 million copies around the world; and the My Weird School series, which has sold more than 35 million copies. Thanks to his many fans who voted in their classrooms, Dan has received nineteen state book awards and ninety-two state book award nominations. He lives in New York City with his wife. You can visit him online at dangutman.com.

Book preview

My name is A.J. and I hate washing my hands.

What’s the point of washing your hands? They’re just going to get dirty again in a few minutes. For that matter, what’s the point of washing anything? When you wash your car, it’s just going to get dirty again. When you wash your clothes, they’re just going to get dirty again. If you ask me, we could save a lot of time if we would stop washing stuff.

Anyway, it was Friday morning. Everybody in my class was putting their backpacks into their cubbies. Annoying Andrea and her crybaby friend Emily were washing their hands in the sink at the back of the room.

I always wash my hands to start each day, said Andrea. It makes me feel clean.

Me too, said Emily, who always does everything Andrea does. Hey, do you want to come over to my house after school today?

Sorry, Andrea told her, but I have my computer class after school.

What is her problem? Andrea is the only kid in our class who has her own smartphone, and she takes classes after school in everything. If they gave a class in nose picking, she would take that class so she could get better at it.

That’s when our teacher, Mr. Cooper, came flying into the room. And I do mean flying. Mr. Cooper wears a cape, and he thinks he’s a superhero. For once, he didn’t trip over anything and fall on the floor.

I have to go to the bathroom to wash my hands, Mr. Cooper said. I’ll be right back. It’s an emergency!

A hand-washing emergency? That was weird. When Mr. Cooper came back from the bathroom, we pledged the allegiance and did Word of the Day.

I have big news, he told us.

Uh-oh. Big news usually means bad news.

You were fired? asked Michael, who never ties his shoes.

You’re quitting? asked Ryan, who will eat anything, even stuff that isn’t food.

You’re dying? asked Neil, who we call the nude kid even though he wears clothes.

The earth is going to be destroyed by an asteroid? asked Alexia, this girl who rides a skateboard all the time.

No, it’s none of those things, said Mr. Cooper. The big news is that I’m going to be away all next week.

WHAT?! That’s even worse than the earth getting destroyed by an asteroid!

I’m going to visit my sister, Mr. Cooper told us. She lives in Spain.

Noooooooooo!

Don’t go!

Reviews for My Weirder-est School #2

[katherine white · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Well it's funny odd, and especially WEIRD you'll love it.