My Angel Of Wisdom

By Alis Cerrahyan

A newborn's first cry can be perceived as the most precious poetry this world could ever offer. Yet; as we know all too well, not all good beginnings lead to a happy ending. Come to think of it; beginnings can often be overrated. However; we, as journeyers, have been given the ability to choose which direction to take and how far to go. Our chances for a successful life are highly unimaginable when and if we decide to receive the divine assisstance.

A childhood she has a hard time remembering makes it near impossible for Jenna to embark on a new journey with Evan who is offering her the kind of love she may never experience. Thankfully; Jenna's angel of wisdom is always present and available to illuminate her path by opening the eyes of her heart to benevolent perspectives.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alis Cerrahyan
• Release date: Mar 11, 2019
• ISBN: 9781386578437

Book preview

INTRODUCTION

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and realized that there was something very important you needed to do? Has instant clarity or understanding ever found you while you were totally incapable of moving in one direction or the other; because good and bad possibilities existed down each road? Did you ever receive a mysterious level of comfort when things didn’t go quite as planned? If you can say yes to those questions; more than likely you’ve already had an encounter with Archangel Uriel; also known as fire of God or God’s light

The Archangel Uriel is the Angel of Wisdom. He is perceived as standing at the gates of heaven with a book in his hand; and he is believed to be so bright and so filled with light that human eyes cannot tolerate his luminescence. He helps you decipher God’s Word while giving you sparks of inspiration and motivation as you seek to live a faithful life. He directs your focus to the eternal presence of God whom he serves; while helping you discover God’s prophecies by using your God-given intuition, visions, dreams, and sudden perceptions. As he extinguishes all internal tension and stress; not only are you able to look at a situation from multiple angles, but others are also being prepared to receive and distribute the proper opportunities in order to help you achieve the best possible result: Glory to God.

The following is a novel dedicated to those who have freed themselves from all self-serving progress in order to be available and instrumental in illuminating someone else’s path. They are called angels of wisdom who continue to nurture others back to health by offering their undying attentiveness and patience. And if you concentrate hard enough; you may think of at least one whom you might want to thank God for being there for you.

CHAPTER 1

I’ve asked to be alone for a few minutes. I’d like to cherish this glorious moment a little longer; all by myself, until both its essence and splendor are woven into my identity in the most imperishable way. And since my yesteryears have been buried deep, I’m not willing to risk tucking this one reality away; at least not yet, for fear of even a slight distance might deduct from its intensity. Ever since the wee hours of the morning, looking out this massive picture window off and on, I’ve been observing the few puffy clouds dance to their ceremonial rhythm while the lighter shades of the night continued to surrender; slowly I might add, to a glorious blue sky. From where I stand, one would think it is trying to spread all the way to beneath my feet. Even the thought of that fascinates me to no end. But what is a whole lot more intriguing is the question if I’ll have the courage to step on it and embark on a journey of transformation. Will I tread on it; gingerly at first, as if trying to crawl out a shadow-like existence with hopes of stumbling upon a brighter side of life? Or will I boogie myself dizzy from the get-go, knowing that the rusty shackles of my fears are being unchained one by one? Nonetheless, like in many cases, the anticipation might be far more rewarding than the actual event.

Right now, I’m taking in the radiance of the sun that’s been serving the earth and every bit of its contrasting elements, day after day, for thousands of years. Yet his dedication has never been interrupted; not even once, with words such as, You owe me. Regardless of his own preferences, he continues to announce a new day into which our very own hopes and expectations have been delicately folded, waiting to be acknowledged and embraced. To be quite honest; developing the right amount of patience might tempt even the most seasoned spiritual guru with wondering if there might be a short-cut somewhere. But it is the newness of each day that keeps reminding us of something yet to be experienced that’s worth the wait.

And no one can underestimate the kind of excitement that comes from watching the birds flutter around as if they’re trying to heighten our prospect of change. Of course; there’s always that slight chance that they might be simply trying to improve their vocabulary of freedom or creating a whole new language imbued with their revolutionary spirit. But who cares? It’s the fact that their natural ability to soar is the very thing we all wish we had; at least time to time, in order to escape the secular and the mundane.

Nonetheless, all these details are highly significant for me right now; because it feels as though I’m also rising from a perpetual obscurity and about to get on board of a brand-new future as of today. And since I might be leaving behind a huge darkness with which I don’t know what to do, it’s easy to relate to this mesmerizingly glorious sky that’s also emerging from the night’s grip and displaying the most unimaginable in comparison to its previous dullness. Maybe; just maybe, we’ll be able to coalesce into one entity this once and start composing an eternal horizon of progress that might be much easier to attain. The kind that’s eager to boost one’s ego in order to inspire hope, courage and confidence. That’s probably why the multilayered nuances of my personal sovereignty took notice of this picturesque vault’s transformation and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed watching every bit of its spectacular details. I took it all in as a fresh chapter through which my new character is meant to develop.

This is the first time a serious change is involving my decision; whereas until now, every segment was imposed on me by the circumstances of this dance called life. Though I understand I’m eternally connected with the secret of everything, I somehow realize, at this very moment, how uniquely different I was made to be. The unwritten portion of my novel is starting to receive meaningful syllables and solid inferences; just so they can be exploited in order to author the highest caliber of all sequels. The song of my heart is being recomposed, one note at a time. And since I finally realize I might’ve survived the haziness of a bygone youth, I already feel like celebrating who I was meant to be all along through the eyes of my imagination. The only question is if I’ll manage to hit the right switch that will help me extol life instead of barely tolerating it.

I only wish my precious guardian was here with me right now. The magnificence of the day has satiated most of my needs so far; except for the fact that I miss her something fierce. Grammy Helen loved me and cared for me in more ways than one. She didn’t just open her home; but she also unlocked her heart for me to step in and nestle within its oasis of serenity. Even though I may have menaced her with some serious questions pertaining to my formative years, she always tried to tiptoe around my innocence as she focused more on how to kindle healthier curiosities about the future. I wish she would’ve been the one to walk me down the aisle and hand me over to the conqueror of my heart with her infamous beam of satisfaction sealing the deal. Only then will the bubbles of my happiness overflow and cascade down the memory lane with irreproachable effervescence. And who knows; I might even taste a complete restitution!

Grammy used to say; A wholesome life isn’t about cutting ties with the unwanted so we can move forward. Then it would be all about running away from something. Life is more about standing where we are and setting new boundaries as we learn how to make sure our happiness will never have to depend on another person’s approval of our beliefs; whether they be physical or spiritual. We must always aim at looking ahead because what we can’t see is highly captivating; and not the other way around. I even jotted the whole thing down in my journal and memorized it so I wouldn’t forget. Did I understand what she was trying to say? I think not! Though I may have come close to scratching the surface this morning as I swam around the wan light of the moon as she continued to yield gracefully to her highly intimidating opponent; I still think it was nothing but a small hiccup in comparison to my majorly chiseled personality.

But I understood something else as it barely departed from her lips. In fact, this one commenced the previous paragraph. She said to me; We make the choice; and then the choice makes us. As I mentioned before; this is the first time I’ve been able to decide on something that’s about to change my circumstances. Could I have ventured out earlier on and taken some responsibilities for my own actions? I probably could have. But it was a lot easier to blame others for their mistakes in which I certainly overindulged. That’s probably why I didn’t really try to dissect the rest of her speech until just a few hours ago. It still wasn’t because I was eager to face the unknown. It was more like I was sick and tired of playing my broken fiddle to the same tune fed on pain and guilt. And I also wanted to honor one other thing Grammy once said, Allow yourself to love with such a sparkling warmth that a lonely soul will know to demand more than just four walls and a ceiling. This one has always made me question if she had a few secrets of her own; but respect wouldn’t let me put her on the stand.

Before this momentous function starts curling like ashen wisps of smoke and finds its way to where the rest of my hazy memories lie in ruins, I take one last look into the mirror and remind myself that this can’t possibly be the biggest day of my life. If it were, it could only be short-lived and extremely limited. And it would also be all about the license, the impressive ring and the white gown. I’d like to believe this is just the beginning of it; because staying true to my vows is about to become the ceremonious validation of my heart’s purpose.

Love is the privilege of being responsible for another. In all actuality, the fact that someone happens to love me and that I’m the one for him adds an unbelievable measure of joy to my insights and intuitions about the future. And to think that I’ve come this far simply because I made myself vulnerable never ceases to amaze me. But I’m not analyzing this one for fear the very magic that touches a wormlike soul like mine and transforms it into an exquisite butterfly might be functioning only through one’s ignorance. Call it magic! Call it miracle! I do intend to keep this one no matter what!

Up until Evan unlocked the secret portal to my heart and dared me to invite love in, I had innocently believed happiness had to be like a slice of cake and a scoop of ice cream you received during a birthday party. The very first nibble was adamant about unfolding hints of sugar and buttery flavor against the roof of your mouth until the overpoweringly irresistible sap started oozing down and traveling through your chest cavity. Though you wanted to devour the entire plateful at once; you always knew to take small bites because there were huge intervals between that one special occasion and the next. How could I’ve ever known happiness would linger some day while its uplifting effects richly and permanently adorned my existence? My lips are stained with an eternal smile through which only laughter and joy will be allowed to flow. It’s as if the universe has granted me longevity just so those who handicapped me with pain and confusion would have to see me prevail.

Though I didn’t sleep a wink last night, the makeup artist was able to conceal the circles around my hazel eyes and made them into the centerpiece peeking from right below my side-swept bangs. Less is more she kept saying. A lovely shade of a salmon blush is complimenting a slightly deeper dusty rose lip color. Since my high cheekbones and fuller lips don’t require further prominence, I’m quite pleased with the subtle nuances. My light auburn hair is down with a few extra curls, proudly displaying the indistinct highlights with which I manage to walk away by the end of each Summer. And I’m not wearing a veil. I want nothing to bedim the effects of this extraordinary display of self-awareness.

My gown isn’t elaborate with details; yet it fits my personality just right. The scoop neckline and the cap sleeves are the only focal points of my white satin gown that softly hugs my thin silhouette. I’m wearing the tiny gold cross hanging from an eighteen-inch delicate link chain Grammy had given me when I graduated from high-school. Even though I’m only six-three, I couldn’t care less about wearing high heels. They’re not for me. I prefer being comfortable.

I hear a slight tap on the door. With it, silence dissipates. Suddenly, I start hearing deafening skanky comments from all sorts of panic pygmies. Anxiety shouts, You’re about to jump off a cliff. Do you really think you have wings to fly? And even if you did, are they strong enough to carry you? Hope tries to interfere, But what if you were to miss the ground and kept on flying? Fear mocks, And what are the chances for that to happen! I freeze on the spot, unable to breathe, with a look of terror on my pale as a moonbeam face. Love, the kindest and the most courageous one of them all, whispers, You’ve been falling for quite some time until now. It is time you ignored those scoundrels. Though life can only be understood backwards, it must be lived forwards. Go ahead. Meet your future.

Falling has never scared me before. I’ve been doing it all my life. In fact, I’ve even believed when and if I somehow managed to fall forever; at some point, I might not even realize I was falling. The day I met Evan was the first day my velocity slowed barely enough that I was able to unknot the rope at the end of which I’d been dangling; frightened and paranoid. That’s when I decided to give Grammy’s encouraging words a try and started taking baby steps toward a healthier existence. Am I ready to walk down the aisle? Absolutely! I feel I’ve been more than ready for this moment. I’m also ready for the rest of the world to experience the fascinating radiance I’ll be sprinkling all the way to the altar. As a matter of fact, I’ll feel twice the happiness knowing that I might’ve conveyed a memorable interlude onto each one of our guests.

I see my uncle appear in his formal suit and tie. I walk to meet his extended right hand and rest mine above it while suppressing a tiny giggle. His wife of twenty-three years starts spreading my train that’s about to trail along the hardwood floors and wipe down the territory with scents of joy and contentment. I take a deep breath, determined to take it all in; one bliss at a time.

We stand before the double doors of the chapel. Suddenly, all my senses are being awakened with the most tantalizing aroma of luxuriant chocolate. And I know my cake is about to be topped with heavenly caramel and slivers of white truffle. The thought of it makes me inhale deeper than ever before. I’m determined to keep that one breath in a little bit longer than usual. I purpose to entrap it and smear all its special effects into every cavity of my being, before I’m ready to release. In the end, I exhale with a sigh of relief. The next breath invites the aroma of the variegated buttercream roses I’m holding as my bouquet. I’m baffled as to how dizzyingly awesome life can get in the blink of an eye. The real magic lies within the efforts of making this moment be so stable and so concrete that it’ll become the path upon which our unity treads, day after day, till death do us part.

Jesu Joy of Man’s Desiring by Bach starts pouring out of a violin as two ushers open the doors and display the procession before the