A Passion for Chaos

By Herb Wright

A Passion for Chaos: Four Black professionals enjoy laughs and sincere friendship. Jordan,a Psychologist loves and needs his family, but struggles with infidelity. His wife has forgiven far too much and heard too many well-constructed lies. She seeks comfort in the arms of his friend, Lester, a brillant Attorney. Together they plot to kill Jordan and Lester's girlfriend. They leave them in an outhouse in the woods to die. So begins a tale of mind games, suspense, romance and adventure. Nothing is as it seems in this thrilling tale until it's twisted happy ending.

 A Passion for Chaos will appeal to readers who enjoy both psychological thrillers and romance novels. It is the best of both worlds, a fantastic fusion created for your pleasure.

 My name is Herbert Wright and I earned a dual degree in Psychology and Political Science. My advance studies in Psychology and B.A. were both completed at City College of New York. I have been employed at a Virginia Medical Center for over twenty years and I am presently Chief of a division of Mental Health. During my free time, I have volunteered to assist in political elections and led a grassroots political organization. Enjoy, Herb.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Herbert Wright
• Release date: Jan 3, 2019
• ISBN: 9781386183303

Herb Wright

Herb Wright is the author of, A Passion for Chaos, a Psychological Thriller. The cental characters are four African American professionals. A single act of betrayal is the catalyst for page-turning suspense, set in Harlem, NY. His debut novel is Do Clones Have Souls. The story of a new, ostracized group of Americans and their journey to freedom. Herb Wright completed Graduate and Undergraduate studies of Political Science and Psychology at City College of New York. He worked as a Mental Health Professional for 30 years. Most recently, as Chief of a division of mental health at a VA Hospital. 

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

Dark clouds overwhelmed the midday sun. The rain came down hard and wet as if God was throwing it from the sky in anger. Umbrellas were turning up and blowing away in a senseless synchronicity. An old man leaned forward taking slow, deliberate steps trying not to be blown off stride. A young woman clung to a streetlight with one hand while trying to keep her skirt down with the other. Hats flew high and landed, tossed end over end and then lie soaked and soiled on cold cement.

Jordan observed the storm from the comfort of his home, jarred occasionally by the sound of thunder. He stared blankly, his mind consumed with fear that Nicole’s plane was caught in the storm and that she was calling his name. He had pleaded with her not to leave and pleading was not his nature. Nicole came home a month ago to find him in the shower with another woman, a neighbor with whom she shared recipes. The two women had laughed together, shopped together, shared secrets and picked up each other’s kids from school. Jordan did not remember if he brushed against her in a narrow hallway or if a hug lingered too long. Something stimulated him, awakening a part of him that was primal and amoral.

He had given Nicole the normal amount of time to cool down. He used the children’s love for him as means of getting her to communicate. She would never tell them of his infidelity, so they did not understand why she was always taking them to Grandma’s house. She appeared emotional and erratic. The kids wanted Daddy.

Nicole had a vision of their future together which was unaffected by Jordan’s immaturity. This vision, her romantic dream, could always be resuscitated by loving words, a few kind deeds and the promise never to stumble again. This time was different. The rational part of her brain would no longer let her deny the obvious. Jordan was a player and it did not matter if it was because his mother died when he was young or that he needed constant acceptance because of so much rejection as a child.

She knew that he was a good person and had good intentions but now accepted that he was incapable of keeping any wish, promise or vow of fidelity. So finally, she left him. It was summer; the kids were out of school. As a nurse, she had no trouble finding employment. She and the boys went south to her father’s house in Georgia.

Jordan talked to her mother and her girlfriends. He talked to her Uncle Owen, who owned the funeral parlor.   Owen always looked at everyone like he was waiting for them to die. He called him. He called her Father, who wished that Jordan was a customer of his brother Owen. Nothing worked.

Finally, she said she would fly up and speak with him this weekend. He loved her so much but she did not understand. His love for her and the boys was everything to him. His infidelity was just a bad habit, Jordan reasoned. She would not leave him if he ate too many doughnuts or if he was a smoker, he thought. No, she would probably just make him smoke outside or cut back. The thunder roared. I can’t lose her like this he said aloud to no one. The phone rang and he grabbed it.

Nicole?

No, Jordan it’s Lester.

Lester was from the old neighborhood. He like Jordan was one of the few to make it out successfully. He was someone Jordan could talk with about old times and navigating through college and careers. Jordan was usually glad to hear from him but now was not the time.

Lester, Nicole is on the way and I am waiting for her to call. I’ll get back to you man.

Wait Jordan don’t hang up. I need you. I really fucked up.

Jordan heard the urgency in Lester’s voice. He wondered if Lester heard the urgency in his. Whatever it is, it can wait, Nicole is in a plane in this...

Lester cut him off. I might have killed her, man; you’ve got to come quick. I don’t know anyone else I can trust.

Where are you? Jordan asked.

I am at my apartment on 88th Street. Come quick Jordan.

Did you call an ambulance? Jordan asked.

I think she’s dead

What are you a fucking doctor? Get her some help, maybe you can save her. Jordan said.

Lester shouted If I call I may go to jail, I can’t end up like Bootleg and Terry, I’d fucking kill myself.

Hold on. Jordan said, I’m heading downstairs. I’ll call you from the car, Shit!

When Jordan reached his car, he tried Nicole again on his cell phone. Silence. He tried to focus on Lester. He dialed his number but got no answer. His windshield wipers were on high and it was still hard to see. It was dark but it was daytime in mid-town. People darted in and out and between cars. He drove in the lane furthest from the street to avoid puddles and New Yorkers who take off at a green light like they have just heard a starter pistol. This was not the time to let your mind wander, he thought. He knows he needed to get it together for Lester’s benefit. He called again. Lester picked up.

What happened? Jordan asked.

She just snapped, man. We were in her kitchen, she was making dinner for me, and I was a little late, no big thing you know. I said something about seeing the kid from the apartment down the hall. I mentioned how the kid was yelling at her mother and acting all crazy. I said I see why she didn’t want kids. I joked that she would be a lousy parent anyway cause she was so selfish. Tracey just started shaking the pan she was cooking in and then started to bang it on the stove. I could see the hot grease land on her arm but she didn’t move or cry out. I stood up and started to move toward her Baby you all right? I said. She turned and threw the frying pan at me, I ducked but I still got burnt and the pan hit me in the head. While I was bent over, she took a butcher knife and came toward me. She had the knife over her head; she held it with both hands lunging at me with the knife. I managed to put my hands over hers and stop the knife from going forward towards me. I could see the anger all over her. She was trying with all her might to stab me.

Then, Jordon, I saw this look in her eyes. It was like she understood she couldn’t overpower me and the anger changed to terror and then this incredible helplessness. It was like, even though she was trying to kill me, for that instant, I felt sorry for her and I relaxed a little. She gathered what was left of her strength and plunged the knife into her belly. I was horrified and let go.

Jordan said Damn, it sounds like she is really hurt bad.

He paused. Is that what really happened? Man, I love you like a brother but that’s hard to believe. Tracey is so quiet and docile; I mean I have trouble getting eye contact out of that girl sometime.

Lester said, It’s the truth Jordan, I swear on everything but you can see why I am scared to go to the cops. Jordan understood. If this was true, it looked bad.

Put your finger under her nose and see if she is breathing and then see if you can get a pulse. Jordan said.  As he waited for a reply, another call came in.

It was Nicole I’m at the airport, come pick me up.

Uh, Nicole, let me call you right back, sweetheart.

He had meant to say, Thank God, you’re ok. I was so worried. Something loving like that. Instead, he sounds suspicious in a way that was all too familiar to Nicole.

No Jordan, what’s going on? You begged me to come here. I came in this horrible storm. Now you get your ass down here or I’m catching the first flight back.

He knew what she was thinking and he knew that if he didn’t pick her up from the airport, it was over between the two of them.

I’ll be right there, Honey, it’s not what you think. Lester has an emergency.

What’s the emergency? she asked.

I’ll tell you when I pick you up, it’s kind of complicated.

‘No Jordan. I think it’s really pretty simple. I don’t know why I’m here." Lester was trying to call him again.

Baby, just trust me he said. He knew immediately that it is exactly the wrong thing to say.

What did you say to me? Nicole asked.

Sorry, Nicole, I’ll be right there.

He clicked over to Lester What, Lester?

She’s breathing but just barely. Are you close by? Lester asked.

Lester, I know, I mean I have no choice, I am going to have to get Nicole first. You need to take Tracey to the hospital. Maybe you could drop her there and then leave or leave her on the street in front. You can’t let her die.

Jordan did not wait for Lester’s reply. He clicked off the phone and turned on the radio. When he looked back at the road, his car was a split second from hitting a dark figure that was running in front of his car. He heard a loud thud before he could brake and then felt the vibrations from the impact. He bounced as his vehicle rolled over the figure and he stopped the car. He looked back through his rear window and he could see people looking at his car. The heavy rain on the glass distorted and elongated their faces like the painting The Scream and he could see the look of horror on their faces. They were looking down at the thing in the street. Jordon’s car was in the middle of traffic. He opened the car door as car horns blared around him. He looked down and behind him. It was a dog. It was pretty badly smashed up and its blood was mixing with the rain and flowing into the sewer drain. Its rear legs were still trying to run and then they stopped and started jerking. Then it died. A woman in the small crowd yelled Murderer!

Most people just glanced and kept walking. Jordan got back in his car telling the crowd he was going to park. He did need to get his car out of the middle of the street; he was blocking traffic. Once he returned to the car, he thought of his wife and Lester and the possibility of his picture in the newspaper. He drove off. He made a couple of quick turns, was soon on the 59th street Bridge, and headed to La Guardia Airport to pick up Nicole.

Jordan wondered if he should tell Nicole about Lester. It felt natural since he shared everything with her except his infidelity. Maybe putting this level of trust in her would bring them closer together. At least she would know he wasn’t with another woman when she called. The risk was that Lester’s girlfriend was someone she knew. She and Tracey were not real tight but they were friendly. At first, they were together a lot because he and Lester were friends but then they struck up their own friendship. Jordan surmised that it was a minor friendship and that he might tell her. He wouldn’t tell her about the dog, since he left the scene of the accident. That might make him look bad. That thing did come out of nowhere. Nicole had always wanted a dog. Maybe that might be a good idea.

Nicole was sitting on a bench outside of the airport under a metal canopy. Jordan was met by a hard stare, crossed arms and terse words, I see you finally made time to meet me.

Jordan ran under the canopy and grabbed her bag. She only had one small bag, not a good sign Jordan thought. He pulled her close to him so she would fit comfortably under the umbrella that shielded him from the rain. Her reaction was to recoil and then yank her arm away. Jordan didn’t react with anger. Instead, he gave her the umbrella exposing him to the rain. He ran with her bag to the car and held her door open. He was standing there soaking wet with a puppy dog look and despite her righteous anger, Nicole had to subdue a smile. She steeled herself and said, Jordan close the door before you get my seat wet.

Jordan got behind the wheel and started the car. Nicole sat down and Jordan took off. She sat in silence and stared out of the passenger window while Jordan talked.

Nicole, while you’ve been gone I have been miserable. Nothing feels good anymore. I feel like I am just an observer watching myself go through the actions of life but without the feelings. I wake up in the morning with the guarantee that my day will have no joy. Do you know what it’s like to...

Jordan, why don’t you answer your phone? I hear it vibrating. I know you feel it.

Nicole, I’m trying to save our marriage. Why would I get the phone in the middle of doing that?

You look nervous Jordan, answer the phone. She said. Jordan knew he had to answer the phone or Nicole would think it was a woman. He knew that it was Lester calling and he would have to help him.

Jordan decided to give a partial explanation. Nicole, Tracey had an accident and Lester needs me to help him. We need to get her to the hospital.

Oh my God Nicole said, I’ll come with you. How bad is she? What happened?

Jordan had promised himself while Nicole was away that, no matter what; he would never lie to her again. He knew now that 10 minutes after greeting her, he would lie again.

Tracey had an old boyfriend who beat her up pretty bad. She managed to call Lester and him and the guy fought. The guy tried to stab Lester and Tracey got in the way.

What! Is she in the hospital, did he call an ambulance?

Yeah baby but with the storm and accidents happening all over town no one has got there get.

Call him and see, Nicole said.

On cue, Lester called back. Where are you, man? Lester said desperately. Lester I’m still with Nicole. I told her about Tracey’s old boyfriend stabbing her. I’m going to take her home and I’ll be right there. Nicole tugs at Jordan’s arm. Uh Lester, Nicole wants to know if the ambulance arrived yet. Jordan pauses. Lester says no, honey. Nicole waits for Jordan to hang up and then says, Let me out, Jordan, I’ll take a cab.

Jordan pretended to protest. No Jordan, Lester needs you and Tracey that poor girl has had enough misery in her life

Jordan wondered what she meant but was relieved to let her go.

Baby I’ll be there as soon as I possibly can.

Jordan pulled off leaving Nicole standing in the wind and rain with his umbrella. Not the reunion he planned.  He rushed to Lester’s 88th street apartment. He knocked on the door.

Who’s there? Lester said.

It’s me Jordan whispered. Lester unlocked and opened the door slightly.

I’m alone, Jordan said. Lester let him in.

The apartment is long and dimly lit. Lester has closed the blinds and turned off most of the lights. They walked wordlessly down the narrow hall. The two walked almost in lockstep on the hardwood floors and it sounded like a march. They arrived in the kitchen and Tracey was leaning up against the wall moaning and pleading with her eyes.

I thought you said she was dead, Jordan said moving to help her.

I never said that Lester replied.

Jordan looked in Tracey’s eyes and knelt in front of her Hold on Tracey, we’re going to get you some help.

Tracey had both hands on her stomach and moved one to reach out to Jordan; her arm trembled and was soaked with blood.

It’s going to be alright, Jordan said to Tracey taking her hand.

Jordan tried to save her. He stood up and Lester hit him from behind. The pain was intense and instantly his vision blurred. He stumbled and turned to see a foggy, wavy distorted image of Lester holding a frying pan before he collapsed. Jordan was barely conscious. He was not sure if he was speaking or thinking but asked Why? He vaguely heard a knocking sound and then footsteps on the hard wood floor. He looked up to see Nicole. She smiled and kissed Lester. They made love passionately. Lester held her up against the wall; her hands were around his neck. It was the last thing Jordan saw before he passed out.

Jordan awakened in complete darkness. It was cold and damp. He still felt groggy but tried to get up. His legs and arms were tied. He was gagged. He tried to move, to slide up the wall but toppled over, his face slammed against the cold hard floor. The gag on his mouth muffled the sound of pain. He squirmed around until he was sitting again. Jordan decided to get his bearings, to be still and get a sense of his surroundings. He heard the pounding of rain on the metal roof. He moved his hand along the surface of the floor and scratched the surface. It felt like concrete. There’s was no light, so there must not be a window. There was a putrid smell; it smelt like shit and piss. He heard the buzzing of flies and felt them against his skin. He heard the rustling of wind though the leaves. He figured out that he was in an outhouse somewhere in the woods.

These bastards have left me to die in shit.  Did she hate me that much? And Lester, ok he’s fucking my wife but why would he want me dead? A low hanging branch scraped against the metal roof. Jordan wished he could shield his ears. The sound sharpened then faded until it sounded like a scream. It was high-pitched and sounded remarkably like h-e-e-e-l-p, H-e-e-e-l-p. He thought his mind was playing tricks on him until he remembered -Tracey. Jordan tapped the wall with his foot but there was no response. He rolled around the cabin until finally, he bumped into her and he could hear clearly her cry for help.

Help me, Jordan.

Her voice was strained but not muffled, she was not gagged. Jordan guessed that they thought she would be dead by now. It’s going to be ok. he said. His eyes conveyed more than his muffled words.

Jordan could think of nothing else to say and she probably can’t hear him anyway. He remembered seeing her hand soaked with blood. He wondered how much longer she would last. He was eerily pleased that he won’t die alone.

Tracey’s tortured moans sounded like they were being tossed around the room propelled by the howling wind. Jordan’s thoughts were caught in the vortex, spinning, rising into consciousness and falling to despair. He tried desperately not to lose himself, his thoughts, his mind. He resolved to stay, to be, and knows that he must gather himself.

He was not ready to die, alone or otherwise. He nudged Tracey; he bumped her repeatedly until he knocked her down. She was now lying on her side against the wall. He slid his back against her front, inching up like a caterpillar until his bound hands were in