Finding My Boo

By Rev. Charles J. Ellis Jr.

Although many seek a mate, not all seek to find that special one according to Gods way. Finding My Boo is an insightful, biblically based guide on how to find lasting love according to Gods plan. Ellis combines his interpretation skills, experiential knowledge, and practical application to provide sound, spiritual council for those seeking a mate.

Rev. Ellis, in an engaging and candid fashion, discusses key elements in finding love and Gods plan for our lives. Ellis reminds the reader that God is in control and that by devoting our lives to Him we will find fulfillment and receive the desires of our collective hearts.

If you are reading this and you are facing difficult circumstances, please understand that God has not abandoned you in your plight. He understands your circumstances and is faithful to those who love Him!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Inspiring Voices
• Release date: Nov 9, 2012
• ISBN: 9781462403523

Rev. Charles J. Ellis Jr.

Rev. Charles J. Ellis, Jr. is currently the pastor of 25th Street Baptist Church in Indianapolis, Indiana. He has a BA degree from Western Kentucky University in speech communications and a master of divinity degree from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. Ellis resides in Indianapolis with his wife, Tonya, and their daughter, BreAnn.

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Copyright © 2012 Rev. Charles J. Ellis, Jr.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

ISBN: 978-1-4624-0352-3 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4624-0353-0 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2012918339

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Inspiring Voices rev. date: 11-07-2012

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1:   Finding My Boo

Chapter 2:   Life as a Single

Chapter 3:   Living Single – Again

Chapter 4:   Finding the Right Match

Chapter 5:   Making Yourself Available

Chapter 6:   Macking Your Boo

Chapter 7:   Understanding Your Boo

Chapter 8:   The Afterword

Bibliography

INTRODUCTION

When I began the sermon series Finding My Boo, I never intended to write a book on relationships. Although I have been a pastor for more than 12 years, I’d never done a formal, indepth study on relationships. And this was for a variety of reasons. However, down the path of ministry, I noticed that God had revealed certain principles to me regarding relationships. Then one day I began to be cognizant of the plethora of books, videos, and other information about finding love and happiness. I began to feel much like the evangelist Luke (Luke 1:1). Although many had taken up the task of giving insight on relationships, I believe my experience in ministry as well as my personal experience in relationships gives me a perspective that needs to be shared. I must admit that there were parts of me that felt unqualified to speak on such an important and emotional topic.

The reality is that there are many people looking for love and happiness. Yet, when I looked at the relationship landscape, I noticed that there were people from all walks of life giving their input and insights. Moreover, many of these writings came from a perspective and mentality that greatly differs from people of faith. Thus, as I continued to study and refine my sermon series, Finding My Boo, I had the growing realization that I did in fact have something to add. As more and more people heard the sermon series, they indicated how important the information I was sharing was and how they wished they’d had the information 10, 15, or even 30 years earlier! My response was two-fold. First, I encouraged them that it’s never too late to implement God-centered principles into our lives and our relationships. Second, it became even more apparent to me that I needed to share this information on a wider scale. Thus, I began the process of this work.

As we move toward the information that I would like to share, I want to make a few preparatory statements regarding this work. First, although this writing is based on the sermonic series Finding My Boo, this work is not a simple cut and paste of those messages. While there is much material here that is also in the sermon series, writing gives one the opportunity to expand to another level of depth that is not realistically available in the context of a sermon. Second, it is important to note that I did not write this piece from the vein of an expert or scholar.

This work is the result of counseling, research, practical experience, and of course my own personal experiences with relationships. I believe this synergy gives me something unique to add to the overall conversation of finding love and happiness. Finally, this work is written from the Christian perspective. I make no apologies for the fact that many principles and perspectives that I share are indeed from the Christian understanding. And while I realize there are other understandings and traditions, it is the Christian understanding that I affirm and believe to be true. Moreover, it should be noted that there is not universal agreement on everything even from the Christian perspective. However, this is my understanding as God has led and directed me. Nevertheless, no matter what your understanding, tradition, or perspective, I believe there are helpful insights in this book that will aid in the pursuit of your boo. Thus, it is my desire that this work will give you insight, hope, and a strong foundation in not only finding a boo, but perhaps even finding the Creator, who made your boo. Therefore, in the words of our Savior "He that has an ear let him hear!

CHAPTER 1

FINDING MY BOO

As I stated in the opening of this piece, there is no shortage of opinions when it comes to relationships. Yet one question that appears to be on the mind of many is how can I find my boo? Now clearly the first thing that needs to be done is to define what we mean by a boo. In fact, when I began the sermon series many people had several questions about what I was doing and what was the overall goal. One of these queries revolved around what is a boo. However, I submit that many of us have much more information about boos than we realize.

It is important not to be fooled by contemporary language. Some might call it a boo; others might call it finding ‘Mr. Right’. Still others might refer to finding a soulmate or a life partner! Whatever language that you use or resonate with, all of these terms effectively describe a boo. In essence, a boo is that person that you’ve hoped and dreamed about. It is that person that you one day hope to spend the rest of your life with. But while many have this desire, the fundamental question for so many people is how do I find my boo. I believe the logical place to begin is with who the scriptures say is the wisest man who ever lived – Solomon. He relates in the book of Proverbs that "He that finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord! (Proverbs 18:22) There are a few things that are notable about this passage as it relates to our conversation on finding our boo.

First, it is important to understand that when Solomon says he that finds a wife, he literally means whoever finds a spouse. Or for our purposes, this could be translated that whoever finds a boo, finds a good thing! Although the translation of the word wife is correct, it must be understood that Proverbs is written from the perspective of a father giving his son fatherly advice. Clearly from the context, the overall principle is that whoever finds a spouse (boo) does well! This is why Eugene Peterson, author of the Message Bible, interprets the passage in this manner:

"Find a good spouse, you find a good life—

and even more: the favor of God!"

The Message

Thus, this passage doesn’t limit good things to wives. Husbands are good things too! Therefore, the overriding principle in the text is that finding