Roadmap to the Heart of God

By Nancy J McLoughlin

This books twenty-three chapters, when taken with a big gulp of humility and swallowed with a huge dose of courage, will lead you on a wild, exciting adventure of coming to know the heart of the God of the universe. Each chapter covers a stand-alone topic that, when assimilated into your thought process, will lead you a step closer to finding that incredible place where you know and embrace the truth: that youre a treasured child of the Most High God. As you walk through each subject, reading it with an open heart, dissecting it through answering the questions, and seeking the wisdom of the Holy Spirit to put your new knowledge into practice, you will find yourself traveling on a collision course with an intense, perfect love. At last you will come into complete union with your Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6), the One your heart has longed for since time began.

So, fasten your seatbelts and join me for the ride of your lifethe one that will open your eyes, turn your world upside down, scare you half to death, and bring you the best life God has to offer you!

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Apr 28, 2012
• ISBN: 9781449744731

Nancy J McLoughlin

NANCY MCLOUGHLIN began her writing career with a book on parenting and one on overcoming stubbornness, as well as two children’s books all stemming from her years as an elementary school teacher. Ms. McLoughlin currently lives in Augusta, Georgia, where she spends her days watching a precious grandson, reading, writing, and working in women’s ministries at her local church.

Book preview

Chapter 1

Help! I’ve Fallen And I Can’t Get Up!

Oh, no! The unthinkable has happened! My worst fears have come true, and the resulting wound to my heart is horrific. I’m in shock and can hardly believe this is happening to me. What did I do to deserve this wound? I wonder. Am I such an awful person that I have to be punished this way? Is this pain my fault somehow? I shout my grief into the empty darkness over and over, but all I hear is an echo of my anguish. Because of the shock and disbelief I’m experiencing, I keep forgetting what happened until I’m jerked back into the reality of my wound. Each time I crawl into denial, I am constantly snatched back to face the truth. It’s like being stabbed with a knife all over again, cutting my wound deeper and wider until it becomes a jagged mess. Will I ever live through this pain? I question others and God. Will I ever stop crying? Will I ever have joy again or think life is worth living?

As I begin to sink beneath the surface of my heartache, I wonder if anyone makes it through life without being wounded, and yet as I look around me, most people look happy. How can that be? Are they just pretending? I know I’m tempted to pretend because I don’t want people to see me in this vulnerable, weak state of mind, unable to pull myself together day after day. I feel so lost, so hopeless, without direction or focus on anything other than my pain. I can’t seem to hear God’s voice speaking to me, and to tell the truth, I’m kind of disappointed and hurt that He would let me go through this pain in the first place. I don’t want anyone to know the depth of my wound, or to judge me (what if they think I’m to blame for it?!), or criticize the way I’m handling it. As I continue to compare my brokenness with other people’s happiness under the same set of circumstances, I come to the conclusion, If most people ARE wounded, there has be a way to continue walking while wounded, and these people have found the secret.

I turn my attention to wondering what the solution is. The first thought that comes to my mind is whether or not the answer involves pretending. Is it okay to pretend? Do I have to wear my wound like a badge? I see some people pour out their woes on anyone that will listen, and I don’t want to be that kind of person! On the other hand, I see people who never process their pain and become bitter, angry people, and I don’t want to turn out that way either. I turn to God’s word and, of course, it has the answer. Psalm 34:18 says, "The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. Now I understand that the healing only comes from the Lord, and that it is HIS job to bind up the brokenhearted. Does that mean, though, that I should just hide my wound and not share it with anyone while the Lord is in the process of healing? Well, it appears that other people are also part of the healing process. Here’s what Paul says in 1 Thessalonians 5:14, Brothers and sisters, we urge you to warn those who are lazy. Encourage those who are timid. Take tender care of those who are weak. Be patient with everyone. Perhaps the idea is that we only share our hurts with those who are safe like a trusted friend, a Christian counselor, a compassionate pastor, or a fellow sufferer. After all, it does say in 2 Corinthians 1:4, "He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us." Who better to bare our wounds to than someone who’s been there and survived!

What if I CHOOSE to hide my wound just because it’s so painful and I don’t want to have to relive it, let alone cry or look weak; you know, the suffer-in-secret kind of behavior. Is that okay? Well, according to my counselor friends, there’s value and healing in actually walking back through the hurtful situation while learning appropriate coping skills. What if it’s also important to OWN our woundedness so we can gain a healthier perspective allowing us to get up and continue walking? After all God does promise that these troubles will continue to happen throughout life. (1 Peter 4:12, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.). Maybe that’s why God has something to say about acknowledging our mistakes out loud because they often contribute to the pain in our lives. Maybe that’s how we find these secrets to walking while wounded. He says, Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results." (James 5:16).

Well, I think to myself, I’ll just hurry and get this sharing time over with so I can get on with my life. I’m tired of being sad and discouraged. I want to get back to being strong and confident instead of weak and filled with disgust for who I’ve become. A new thought hits me! What if God’s greatest desire for me isn’t to be strong and in control? What if this brokenness is God’s perfect opportunity to work in my life and teach me to be humble? He does say in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, But he said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. Can I handle being weak and fragile? Can I believe that this woundedness I carry around like a heavy burden will actually become my greatest asset from God’s perspective? Am I willing to allow my pain to be used by the Lord to help other freshly damaged comrades find hope, so they, too, will learn to walk while wounded? Who knows, I say as I fling out my hand in surrender to the Lord’s will for my pain, God may take my ugly, oozing wound and turn it into an eye-catching, attractive BEAUTY MARK!

1. Have you ever sustained one of these life-shattering kinds of wounds? If so, what was it and how long ago did it take place?

2. What are your honest feelings toward this wound? Is the wound in your head (a cultural wound, a denominational wound, an up-bringing wound, a misunderstanding, or a miscommunication), or in your heart (an offense to your personhood, an offense to your worth, or an offense to your intellect)? Have you run the question, What is the truth? past both the head and the heart wounds? If so, what was the result?

3. On a scale of 0-10, how much healing has taken place so far on your wound? Are you walking yet or are you still flat on your back?

4. Who have you shared your wound with? How did that turn out?

5. Have you seen any sign yet of God turning this wound into good for you? If so, how? If not, how do you feel about that?

6. How do you handle the weak, vulnerable part of being wounded?

7. What do you think of pretending and putting on a strong front after being wounded? On the other hand, have you ever felt as though you said too much about your wound? How did you handle those feelings?

8. How do you feel toward other wounded people in your life? Do you feel tender toward them? Or do you feel like you need to run away because their pain reminds you too much of your own pain?

9. Now that you’ve focused on being wounded, do you know or suspect that there are more deep wounds in your heart? If so, use the rest of this page to describe them, write down how you feel about them, and determine where you are in the healing process. Have you seen any good come out of them yet? If so, describe God’s possible reasons for allowing you to be wounded in the first place. If not, how do you handle waiting for His goodness to show up?

Chapter 2

Okay, So I’ve Been Wounded—

Now What?

All right, fine! I’m agreeing that I’m wounded. Now what do I do with all the pain and helplessness my admission costs me? At least pretending and staying in denial allows me to kick the can down the road, and delay the grieving, writhing, teeth-gnashing process. Now that I’m choosing to live in reality, the constant, debilitating pain threatens to do me in at any moment. How do I stave off the feelings that disaster is just around the corner, or that I’m not going to survive this wound?

Once again I turn to God’s Word, and once again, I’m surprised to find the answer! God actually questions me in His Word as though I should KNOW the answer, and maybe I do. Maybe I’m just too afraid to try His solutions. "Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." Isaiah 4:28-31.

"I understand that this is the answer: ‘But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.’ I just don’t know what that kind of trust LOOKS like, I say to the Lord. I don’t know how to trust when I don’t FEEL any trust. Besides, You let me be wounded! How can I trust someone who doesn’t take better care of me than THAT? By the way, I have a few good ideas of my own on how to survive that I might want to try—is THAT so wrong? Also, how long will it take after I start trusting You before You send me the strength? I can’t hang on much longer . . . . As I think about what I just said to the Lord, I’m so glad God doesn’t take offense at my questions, but prompts me to look further. Psalm 37:34 comes to my mind, Don’t be impatient for the Lord to act! Keep traveling steadily along his pathway and in due season he will honor you with every blessing." As I ponder God’s words and wonder how I could ever quit being impatient, more verses come to me (Proverbs 3:5-6). Even though I know these verses by heart, I see them in a new light today. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, I recite. I get it! I say excitedly. The key to trusting is my choice to do it with ALL my heart, with everything in me, completely, no matter what logic shouts at me, with abandonment to HIS will instead of my own. Do not depend on your own understanding, I continue with my recitation. Well there you have it! God DOESN’T want me to try my own ideas. He doesn’t want me to depend on my own thought processes at ALL, which is a hard pill for me to swallow. I move on to the next verse, Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take." What? So now I have to seek HIS will in everything I do, and HE will show me what to do and how to survive? Wow! I don’t think that if I wasn’t so desperate, I would even consider doing what these verses command me to do. After all, they go against everything that seems right to me! What’s that you’re saying, God? You know better than I do? Oh right, I remember that verse:

‘My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,’ says the Lord. ‘And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.’ Isaiah 55:8-9. Well, I can’t say I blame the Lord for giving me these kinds of directives. I haven’t exactly done the best job possible with my life so far; I guess I have no other choice but to do things His way and actually have faith that He’ll come through for me.

Now that I’ve made the choice to trust only the Lord and wait for His guidance, what do I do in the meantime? I’m still hurting and nothing has changed in my circumstances except to watch them to go from bad to worse! As I start to worry and fret, the thought comes to me to start putting into practice what I am choosing to do—and that’s to ask the Lord for wisdom. Immediately, I remember a handout I received at a recent women’s retreat and I race to find it. I can’t believe the Lord is answering my prayer this quickly. Maybe trusting Him really does work! Once I find this handout, I realize it has the answers I’m searching for. The first section deals with basic survival skills—how I can make it through each day.

The Hang-On-To List When Enduring Panic,

Pain, and Suffering

1. Grab 2-3 verses and make them my mantra ("I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Phil. 4:13, The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed." Psalm 34:18, "Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10, Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all He has done." Phil. 4:6, "And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them." Romans 8:28)

2. Make an ongoing list of things