Star Signs and One Minute Towards a Dead End Relationship

By Tim Ekwulugo

Star signs and one minute towards a dead-end relationship, attempts to address all the signals that usually tell us that a relationship will not be successful any time we meet a potential lover. This will help us know when to apply the breaks. He or she who acquires this book will be in the position to embrace some of the notable signs which will expose possible love rats,wrong partners, wrong marriages, a treasure hunter, gold diggers or people who are out there to settle some scores towards the opposite sex due to a number of failed relationships.
The relationship game is a cut and throat business which must be taken seriously. Ignorance of some of the signs uncovered by the author can possibly lead us towards a lot f failed relationships which will subsequently affect our future happiness. The obvious consequences of failed relationships are heart breaks, nervous break down, difficulty to love again, hatred of the opposite sex, loneliness , suicidal tendency and so on.
Wouldn't it make more sense for us to trade carefully in this relationship game and avoid making the same mistake all over again. The signs of a possible dead-end or unhealthy relationship tend to manifest during the initial meetings with possible lovers, however these signs are usually overlooked. We must task our self during our initial encounters with potential lovers to avoid falling in love with the wrong person.
The probability of a relationship failing when we meet a potential lover is a lot higher than the relationship becoming successful and this means that we must trade cautiously to avoid being the victim.
Some of the signs uncovered by the author will be of immense benefit in helping some of the readers in making the right decision, particularly ensuring that the probability of success will be a lot higher than failure.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse UK
• Release date: Nov 15, 2012
• ISBN: 9781477231487

Tim Ekwulugo

Team link pharmaceutical ltd is a specialist company that deals with medications and preventative measures on chronic diseases. They have been involved with a lot of awareness campaign on how early life style and dietary habits can be changed in order to embrace a healthy and energetic life style later in life. They have also looked into the consequences of this neglect in the form of higher medical bills, poor health and dependency on others and even death as we get older, which would have been avoided. Currently they are embarking on numerous research on various solutions on chronic diseases. Tim Ekwulugo the co author bearing in mind Team link pharmaceuticals profile, approached this company and formed a good partnership with them in order to get to the root of the problem of these killer ailments. The co author felt that lack of knowledge may have been the reason why the death rates on these ailments are considerably high and most are suffering today. The co author actually had an aged grand mother who lived an energetic life style and died at the age of 108 having observed some of the measures uncovered in this publication. Tim Ekwulugo is well educated with a Masters degree.

Book preview

Chapter 1

1.00 Dead-end relationships

Dead-end relationships are characterized with a lot of signs and tend to mean that the relationship is not working out. This means that nothing changes, irrespective of what each of you tend to do, the number of talks does not change things either. In most circumstances both partners tend to do things out of obligation instead of love, and being together tend to require a lot of hard work and effort. In these relationships both partners tend to lack trust in each other, hurt one another and show absolute disregard to each other’s feelings and desire. I can go on and on to describe a dead-end relationship, but one thing is clear, there is usually no attraction both physically and emotionally and the only thing holding the relationship appears to be usually sex. At this stage, it is quite obvious that the relationship is pretty much over. With relationship success and divorce rate currently on the high, a considerable number of people are making a serious mistake in deciding who to get involved with in a relationship or even spend the rest of their life with. Experience shows that most single or divorced people are pretty lonely and that the obvious temptation is to look for a partner to connect with in an intimate and emotional way and in this instance, they tend to overlook some of the do’s and don’ts, including the bad sides of their potential partner. I am sure that you already know the obvious result of this kind of union. Looking back, both partners must have felt good and optimistic sort of like a drug, but then with time the real truth begins to surface.

THERE IS USUALLY NO ATTRACTION BOTH PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY AND THE ONLY THING HOLDING THE RELATIONSHIP APPEARS TO BE USUALLY SEX

1.10 The Wrong Partner

On the road to finding a partner, male or female, it is important that you apply some basic criteria, before falling in love. Some of these criteria might be that your potential partner needs to want to have children in future, they must be financially stable, emotionally matured, physically fit, tall, dark, and so on. It is in your interest to monitor your criteria. I know that there are some criteria you might be prepared to overlook, however as soon as you find out that your potential partner is falling short on your key criteria, it is in your best interest to move on before you fall in love and perhaps end up in a dead-end relationship. The simple truth is that the wrong partner is pretty much the one that falls short of your criteria, particularly the major ones. It is true that I am not a mind reader, but we usually have different criteria for meeting our dream partner and I know from statistics that we are very good in ranking our criteria, when we initially meet our date, but along the way, if we fall in love, we tend to overlook some of these criteria.

I don’t know exactly how to explain this but doesn’t this make us look stupid and vulnerable? Because half way along the line, when we have already fallen in love, we tend to try our very best to reverse the situation and we all know that this cannot be possible and gradually the relationship starts experiencing problems, and we then start falling out of love and subsequently a breakup of the relationship, becomes obvious, together with all the emotional stress, bitterness, regrets and occasionally rushing into another relationship, with an obvious re-bound.

During the dating process we often accommodate things that seem to fall short of our criteria and appears unacceptable to us and if we proceed in such relationship and start falling in love, we end up compromising in unhealthy ways; this is not good for healthy relationships.

Early in the dating process, it is very necessary that we turn away from those things that are unacceptable to us and that our potential partner have sailed through our key criteria if we want to avoid committing our self with this wrong partner.

AS SOON AS YOU FIND OUT THAT YOUR POTENTIAL PARTNER IS FALLING SHORT ON YOUR KEY CRITERIA, IT IS IN YOUR BEST INTEREST TO MOVE ON

1.20 Assessing your Past Relationships

We all have our ups and downs in any relationship, in some circumstances we even lose our entire self esteem, of course these are experiences that make us stronger and wiser and looking at the whole perspective, it is not all bad in the long run, but in the short term, we may feel bruised and betrayed, but we have to learn from our mistakes, and then use our experience towards new relationships.

Before we think of getting into a new relationship, it is important to know that we must not keep making the same mistakes that led to the failing of previous ones. I know that relationship is not easy and that if you are seriously attracted to someone, it is most likely that some of these mistakes can be over looked. But we have to seriously task ourselves, knowing the full heartbreak and consequences of jumping from one failed relationship into another. We need to assess, what exactly went wrong from our previous encounters. It might be your fault or your partners, but you must review the situation and if possible, compare this with your other failed relationships and you will be surprise the kind of discovery you will begin to make. You must be prepared to make some adjustments, in situations where you might have gone wrong, and then mourn the failed relationship before entering into another. Never try to get into another relationship in a hurry or re-bound. I know that we are all different and tend to act in different ways, after coming out of a failed relationship, but try to keep your cool. I had two female friends, when I was in the university, who were battered and heart broken when their relationship failed. I was there to comfort them and was a shoulder for them to cry on.

One of the girl experienced a very low self esteem, and as a result was having sex, with every male suitor on campus, while the other totally short herself out with the rest of the males. She withdrew inside her shell, and really never dated any other male until she left the university. As you can see the reactions from my female friends took two different extremes, and perhaps you may have acted in a different manner, when confronted with similar situation. My advice is to take things easy, and know that you are not the only person facing similar situation. You must find a way to forget your past and move on. Try and make new friends, visit your local gym, find new hobbies that interest you and perhaps think more of the bad side of your ex than the good side, and believe that you had a narrow escape. Getting rid of the pictures and thinking more of your ex bad sides will help you forget about the relationship faster.

THINKING MORE OF YOUR

EX BAD SIDES WILL HELP YOU FORGET ABOUT THE

RELATIONSHIP FASTER

1.30 What do you really want in a relationship?

First and foremost, we must ask ourselves, what we really want from our relationship. I have to say that we all have different reasons for entering into a relationship. When I was in my teens, I was not really looking for any serious affair but rather I was basically interested in having a good time, I don’t know about you, but as I grew older my needs in my relationships changed. Depending on where you fit in, what you really want in a relationship may be different from what your potential partner wants and you must always listen to your instinct and what your potential partner says.

I once had a very close friend he had everything, good job, nice house, expensive cars and Fabulous holidays yearly, and he was looking for the perfect woman to marry. He was on this mission for ten years and had no luck. After ten years we went out for a drink and he told me that he is tired of looking because all his relationship failed irrespective of the fact that he has all it takes to make any woman happy. I told him to go back that night write down what he feels is his ideal woman and meet me up the next day. The following day he came up with this long list and expectations. The truth is that he set his standards very high and was actually attracted to young girls of between 19 to 20 years old. The reality is that, he wasted most of his 10years looking for this ideal woman in the wrong age group and that most of his lovers, where not really ready to settle down, but seems to be having fun and enjoying his money. The matter was further compounded with the fact that he was not flexible enough to accommodate the true goals and aspirations of these young girls, which subsequently meant that most of his relationships were not working. Finally following this encounter, he did make some considerable amends and got married within 1 year and is still happily married to the same woman. The truth is that your goals and aspirations must not be far off from what your potential partner wants. The answer is that don’t wait until you are married with kids to start putting across to your husband what you really want from the union. These issues are best dealt with before you get married. Quite often during dating, people are scared to discuss sensitive issues to avoid scaring off potential partners, but who really suffers in the long run. I guess you already know what the answer is.

Let’s face the fact, in some circumstances things can change as we get older, but wouldn’t it really be better to consolidate on certain key facts earlier in the relationship. I am not saying you should hold your partner to ransom, but at least you must be prepared to make certain compromise if you really want the relationship to work.

You must try not to commit yourself to a long term relationship until you have a general idea of your partner’s views in relation to yours. While there is no obvious guarantee that this will end up in a happy