Don't Toot in a Tanning Bed: (And Other Life Lessons God Taught Me)

By Karen Heinrich

Do you think God has a sense of humor? The author of Don't Toot in a Tanning Bed, Karen Heinrich, does. She relates an often hilarious series of events in her life which God used to teach her valuable life lessons. Read how a vegetarian fast and a tanning bed led to a memorable journey of healing and restoration. Be prepared to look at obstacles that lie in your path and even at embarrassing moments in an entirely new light.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Mar 2, 2012
• ISBN: 9781468551877

Karen Heinrich

Karen Heinrich is a special education teacher and a long-time worker in children's ministry. In her spare time, she is a trainer and speaker at local events for a health and wellness company. She is active in her local church as a Sunday School teacher and is a foster parent. She lives in Anaconda, MT with her two zany dogs and a revolving door to the foster children.

Book preview

Don’t Toot

in a

Tanning Bed

(and other life lessons

God taught me)

Karen Heinrich

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AuthorHouse™

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Bloomington, IN 47403

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© 2012 Karen Heinrich. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 2/29/2012

ISBN: 978-1-4685-5187-7 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4685-5189-1 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2012902736

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This book is printed on acid-free paper.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Conclusion

Introduction

Do you think God has a sense of humor? I’ve always thought He must because, after all, He made me. And I’m a piece of work, let me tell you! Often I epitomize the blonde joke and I’m not even blonde! I frequently mix up figures of speech common to our language, and my son has told me I sound like someone trying to learn the English language. I can be very klutzy at times and have silly things happen to me often. For instance, once I was frantically looking for a sticky note containing important information. I couldn’t find it anywhere! A few minutes later a fellow teacher came into my room and, noticing my agitation, asked what was wrong. I explained the situation and turned back to my desk to look through papers again. My friend burst out laughing. I had sat on the note, sticky side up! Fortunately, God has given me the ability to laugh at myself instead of getting embarrassed. Some days, I just keep myself in stitches.

Recently, God has shown me His sense of humor in a whole new way. He knows me so well and He knew that this would help me acknowledge and internalize some things He’d been wanting to teach me for a long time. My creative and loving Father has begun using strange and funny things from my life and funny things I read or hear to teach me some critical life lessons. Through these, I have begun to understand that my walk with Him has been hindered by some unrecognized sin in my life as well as by some unhealed and unacknowledged hurts from my past.

This little book is a story of the journey to healing that God has taken me on in recent months. As on all journeys with our Father, the final destination is yet to be attained, but it is a destination well worth the wait. I would encourage you to open your life to Yahweh (the Hebrew name for God) and see if He has a similar journey in mind for you. As you will discover in this story, what may initially seem to be too painful or too difficult, in actuality opens the door to a life of freedom in Him that is unbelievable. I pray that my story and the lessons God has taught me along the way will bless you as much as they have me. As Paul prayed for the Ephesians, I pray that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height—to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3:16-19)

Chapter 1

Don’t Toot in a Tanning Bed

Have you ever noticed how God is able to use the smallest and most mundane (or in this case, perhaps bizarre is a better word) events in life to teach us a lesson? That’s what happened to me one day at the spa!

To set the stage for any of you unfamiliar with a tanning bed, imagine being in