The Sexy Umbrella of Doom

By Miriam F. Martin

Rain marks the beginning of Charley Vaughn’s vacation. The kind of rain fit for an epic nap interrupted by coffee breaks. But no matter, Miami offers Charley endless fascination.

Magical fascination, as it turns out.

Talking dogs, alligators singing opera, and street magicians. And one sexy umbrella that purrs like like a kitten when opened.

One look upwards into the transparent blue plastic, and Charley finds herself walking on the clouds with a strange and alluring man. Soon enough, they do a lot more than just walking.

If you enjoy quirky and humorous erotic fantasy, be sure to read The Sexy Umbrella of Doom.

Bonus short story included: Femme Phobia.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Hermit Muse Publishing
• Release date: Jan 28, 2018

Miriam F. Martin

Miriam F. Martin grew up wanting to be a cam girl, but excessive stage fright killed the dream. Her passion for getting strangers off over the wild worldwide web hasn’t died yet. So she focuses her time writing smutty books for smart people, like you. When not writing erotica, she also writes science fiction and fantasy. Her hobbies include playing the guitar badly, misinterpreting the future with Tarot cards, and over-analyzing dreams. She also enjoys first-person shooters, rogue-likes, and hidden object games. Her quest in life is to have a house full of cats. Miriam loves to hear from her fans, and she may be contacted through her agent, David Anthony Brown, at: david (at) danthonybrown (dot) com

Book preview

The Sexy Umbrella of Doom

The Sexy Umbrella of Doom

Miriam F. Martin

Hermit Muse Publishing

Contents

In the clouds…

The Sexy Umbrella of Doom

Femme Phobia

About the Author

Also by Miriam F. Martin

In the clouds…

Rain marks the beginning of Charley Vaughn’s vacation. The kind of rain fit for an epic nap interrupted by coffee breaks. But no matter, Miami offers Charley endless fascination.

Magical fascination, as it turns out.

Talking dogs, alligators singing opera, and street magicians. And one sexy umbrella that purrs like like a kitten when opened.

One look upwards into the transparent blue plastic, and Charley finds herself walking on the clouds with a strange and alluring man. Soon enough, they do a lot more than just walking.

If you enjoy quirky and humorous erotic fantasy, be sure to read The Sexy Umbrella of Doom.

Bonus short story included: Femme Phobia.

Copyright © 2018 by Hermit Muse Publishing

Cover Image: conrado/BigStockPhoto

Cover Design: David Anthony Brown

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

All characters, events, and settings are fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidence.

THIS WORK IS INTENDED FOR ADULT READERS 18+

Created with Vellum Created with Vellum

The Sexy Umbrella of Doom

In the rain

On Wednesday evening, despite the downpour, Charlene Vaughn felt like she was walking on the clouds. Tomorrow began her long needed vacation. She packed up her legal briefs and memos into her messenger bag, hooked her magical umbrella on her forearm, and headed down to the lobby .

The rain started at three in the afternoon, and didn't seem to want to let up. Rained cats and dogs, maybe literally. Charley wouldn't have been surprised. In her three weeks of living in Miami, she witnessed at least one magical event per week.

Always small, yet wondrous things. A man who pulled a hot dog out of his sleeve, and gave it to a homeless guy. A dog who talked in short, mostly one word sentences. (He liked the word yes, for some reason.) The world's smallest alligator, which fit in the palm of a woman's hand and sang high pitched opera.

Maybe the hot dog man was just a regular street magician who did nice things for people. Maybe the alligator was only a ventriloquist act.

But dammit, that dog was mighty convincing.

Aside from watching Burn Notice, Charley had no idea what Miami was like until she moved there. She never expected this. Miami was full of amazing secrets and wonderful magic. Granted, she hadn't yet experienced the summer humidity, or lived through a hurricane, or had a real alligator swim in her pool. But Miami was just freaking cool in so many ways.

She hadn't quite expected it to rain so much though. Today, it was a steady downpour that thumped against the office windows in a constant rhythm. Charley wanted to take a nap. Coffee helped. So did a dinner of left over pasta with marinara sauce, heated up in the microwave.

She waited at the revolving door in the lobby, hoping the rain would stop. Or at least slow down so she wouldn't get so wet.

Charley wasn't dressed for getting wet today. She wore a navy blue pinstripe suit, with a short skirt three inches above