The Parents Guide to the Art of Negotiation

By Alastair R Agutter

The Parents Guide Book

We all want to be good Parents in our life time. But the journey is one of endurance, joy and heartache. In our society today there are many books and questionable experts on caring for Children and bringing them up. The recent programmes on television, in many cases amount to child abuse and gross ignorance written by the utterly mindless, but perhaps this again reflects on our society today!

I never knew the answer then, as a young man just before leaving the forces. But I had an opportunity to ask a spiritualist what my best job would be? Filled with ambition, I was open to suggestions be it a scientist, lawyer, doctor etc. But the answer I got was as a "Father" and looking back some thirty plus years on, I knew the answer to be right.

It may seem strange for a man to write on such a subject, sadly still in today's society few really appreciate the thoughts of man and especially when it comes to the love and well-being of their Children.

Having been blessed with 5 children and today, beginning to read and hear about my expressed views in this book, now being covered by the media and press. I know the content of this book is invaluable when it comes to common sense, love and care. 

Beyond the superficial material nonsense of our society today, if we all paused and looked around at all other life forms, we would finally appreciate our life's purpose is to love and create life. Such views are not romantic whims, but a scientific fact in relation to Natural Law and Quantum Mechanics.

The biggest and most important job in our lives is being a parent. It is rewarding and after time, such an experience begins to put all other things and events into perspective.

I leave you with this Quote;

"As Parents the best we can ever do is to always love our Children. For regardless of our views they will always go their own way." ~ Alastair R Agutter

I hope this book can be a unique and valuable reference, resource and companion for you and found within the following key chapters.

INSIDE THIS BOOK:

Chapter One - Preparing To Start Your Family

Chapter Two - A New Baby Arrives and How to Care as a Parent

Chapter Three - Those Great Fun Moments Begin, Little Toddlers

Chapter Four - Starting Out in Life Infant School for Your Little One

Chapter Five - Building a Strong Relationship and Junior School

Chapter Six - Senior School and My Child Has Become an Alien

Chapter Seven - Further Education and Adulthood of Your Children

Chapter Eight - Being There As Parents in Their Relationships 

Parenting never ends, it only begins!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alastair Agutter Digital Publications
• Release date: May 31, 2014
• ISBN: 9781499742978

Alastair R Agutter

Alastair R Agutter was born in Farnborough, Kent, England in 1958. He is a Best Selling Author of more than 30 specialist books. He is a Philosopher, Logistician, Theoretical Physicist, Writer, Publisher, Naturalist, Environmentalist, Computer Scientist, Creative Digital Artist and Proud Father of Five Children. His first specialist book was published in 1989 and writing on the South American Marine species the symphysodon that he managed to breed successfully in captivity after a great deal of heartache. In the book introduction over 25 years ago, he wrote about climate change concerns and with warnings. From the age of just 6 years, Alastair took up Gardening, being taught by his Grand Father, William Agutter. At 9 years of age, and as a young boy, Alastair also took up the hobby and past time of Tropical Fish Keeping, and became a very successful Aquarist , breeding countless species of cichlids and other tropical fish for over 46 plus years. Still today Alastair remains one of a select few in the world to breed Wild Discus (symphysodon) in captivity, and remains an authority on the subject ,and also as an accomplished author. As a writer of over 25 years today, Alastair never knew he would become a specialist books author. But then on reflection of his life's journey today, such a path does now make absolute sense!

Book preview

Introduction

The Parents Guide to the Art of Negotiation

Welcome to ‘The Parents Guide to the Art of Negotiation’ for all new and existing parents to ensure a full and loving relationship with their Children.

I have been prompted to write this book based on my experiences as a parent since 1979 to the current day, where I am now a Grandfather as well as a Father and encouraged by my youngest to write this book, based on her experiences at School regarding her friends and acquaintances.

Very often today in the frenetic material world that we are embroiled in, it can be very easy to lose sight of the founding reasons for our very own existence. But if we can all just pause and take a deep breath and look around us, in a quiet and secluded place be it in a park, or a walk along a shoreline we will again find the answers.

Every living plant, bird, insect and organism has one main mission and plan in the great evolutionary scale of things and that is to create, refine and develop life.

One of our greatest Scientists of all time ‘Isaac Newton’ expounded the virtues and covenant of ‘Natural Law’ and as scientists today, further discover the gene codes of life today continued greater understanding is gained.

The World of Physics today in the form of Quantum Mechanics also informs us more about the story of life and all organisms and species we co-exist with on this Earth.

The evolution and refinement of all life forms derive from copulation (love) and everything we see shares this common trait and is a Natural and Universal Law, powered by energy throughout the Universe.

When we sit, pause and realize such facts we can all then appreciate and realize our most important task throughout our physical life time and that is to continue the evolutionary journey of giving and preserving new life.

So this book is to help parents have a complete and loving successful relationship with their Children as they grow and continue on their evolving journey through life.

I therefore hope the information found within in this book can contribute in a very positive way based on my own personal life experiences as a parent, but more importantly as a Father.

Quotation Children are not invited into this World, nor do they have a say. The least we can do is love and care for them all ~ Alastair R Agutter

I hope you find the book both informative and a valuable companion at times of need, as a new or existing parent carrying out this most important job of all!

I dedicate this book to my third Son Robert James Agutter who tragically died from congenital heart disease born on 16th August 1986 and taken from Mother on the 20th of August 1986 continue to walk with me sweet child and Son of mine!

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Alastair R Agutter

Author

Chapter One

Preparing To Start Your Family

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Today as we all know, in this uncertain World the task of Parenthood is a journey of continued lasting love and devotion. 

Parenthood is not a casual vocation or event in any couples life, it can be a long and arduous journey bring up Children from the ages of 0 to 18 years, yet parenting and devotion does not end then!

To be a good parent you have to accept that when your baby is born, you as a parent and couple become second class citizens.

When your baby is born, he or she must come first before anything else and the story is no longer about you, or what you want!

The above words may sound harsh to some and if they are found to be so, you need to seriously question and consider if you and your partner (Husband or Wife) are suitable for parenthood.

A baby (child) is a miracle of life and a human being dependent on you, to grow and learn about the world around them. Coupled to such a task is for you to ensure your child learns from your devotion as a parent. To also ensure your child is ably equipped to survive and thrive, being free of ignorance that we so often witness and see around us, commonly describe as extremists.

When you have a Child, there is a universal covenant of Natural Law to protect and create life and as I said in the introduction as a parent, such a task is your most important job!

If you have decided to have or plan a family, age difference does have a bearing in relation to parenthood and there are pluses and minuses, to being young, or older parent when starting a family.

I found myself having my first Son’s at a younger age; the burden and worry of responsibility of any complications were then considered far less. But regarding my youngest in later years, I found myself giving greater thought, consideration and worry regarding her well-being.

It is often concurred in younger life woman are normally more mature than men and perhaps this relates to child birth especially in the gene code.

Natural child birth should always be your goal when having a baby and here is why!

The trauma and life threatening endurance and physical effort in natural child birth, bonds closer a Mother to her sibling, for it is an event no man would ever wish to go through or endure.

Modern technology today has allowed for more caesarean operations regarding child birth. But I genuinely believe if a Mother has not endured such an event through natural child birth but experienced instead, a birth via caesarean. The event of Child birth by caesarean becomes a more routine event, and this method of child birth, does not necessarily deliver the realization and gravity via human consciousness that will bond a child with a mother much more.

Through pregnancy and child birth, both members in the relationship need to understand and appreciate a woman’s body will change and again, if either couple are concerned of such superficial thoughts, again perhaps parenthood is not a journey or path to embark on.

Sadly today in a very superficial material society can be found many negative views from commercialism in the form of marketing only designed and engineered to sell products in money terms, where women can become bombarded with products and views, based on appearance, giving them a confidence issue.

So I will now dispel these myths from an honest man’s perspective for all women!

From child birth, a woman’s body will leave many stretch marks, but these are signatures of motherhood and should not be looked upon as an affliction, but the lines of a journey of life shared between man and woman in union.

Other changes will relate to sexual and intimate parts of the body again in relation to the vagina that can very often become larger or stretched. But again this is another episode and signature of motherhood and shared union