Single Satisfied & Searching

By Danny Elijah Gilbert

How can you be single & satisfied, yet searching for a soul mate? The Number one question asked about the title of this book!

Danny Gilbert takes the daring task to be transparent and honest in this book as he shares why his two marriages fell apart. With an open door view into his life you will identify with his struggle and feel where he is coming from. It is quite possible that there is not one single person who will read this book and not enjoy it.

There are so many tips, life lessons, guidelines and unanswered questions in this amazing reading.

From single as a young man to the age of 29, to married to a young woman ten years younger and then another marriage and single again. Danny writes from many years of being single before, during and after marriage. Yes, there is a such thing as being single and married! And he vividly explains it!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Danny Elijah Gilbert
• Release date: Jan 19, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310399855

Danny Elijah Gilbert

Danny Elijah Gilbert is founder and presiding Bishop of Jehovah Rapha Ministries, a non-denominational evangelical Christian ministry. Danny has been doing the work of ministry since he was 16 years old, and has been a Christian since he was 13. He started as a young Sunday school teacher and then began to evangelize on the streets of Newark, New Jersey. He has been a pioneer of youth evangelism in high school, organizing a youth evangelism team and leading many of his high school peers to the Lord.As a diligent and faithful servant in the Kingdom of God, his gift and calling has opened many doors for him. At the age of 18, he was the youngest licensed minister in his denomination. Traveling throughout the northeast Danny preached & taught the word of God, while encouraging believers in the faith. God used him from church to church, in home Bible studies, youth detention units, street evangelism, soup kitchens & senior citizen homes. Danny was ordained by his grandmother by the laying on of her hands.Danny is currently author of five books which include “The Love Book”, “Success Secrets Revealed” and “The Master Book of Prayer”. As a gifted teacher, & inspirational preacher with the gift of prophecy; his vision is to continue building a global ministry through print media, the Internet, television and radio, while building churches nationally and internationally. If you would like to contact Danny Gilbert to speak at your next event, please feel free to send an e-mail at the address below.Vision 500Danny Gilbert is believing God for 500 vision partners who will help him expand Jehovah Rapha Ministries around the world. To learn more about Jehovah Rapha Ministries or how you can become a vision partner please visit: www.jrapha.org or email: [e-mail]

Book preview

Single Satisfied & Searching

Danny Gilbert

Copyright 2014 by Danny Gilbert

Smashwords Edition

Cover design by Danny Gilbert

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electron, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise – without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews or articles that reference the Author and the book.

Published by Radical House publishing

Conyers, Georgia

Printed in the United States of America

Radical House Publishing

Conyers, Georgia

Introduction

Our life journey runs parallel to time and the four seasons. Every year we can look forward to the next seasonal change and take measures for preparation. We can look ahead and know that a new season is coming and prepare for that season.

With preparation there is always expectation. No one expects to go from summer to fall and not change according to the current season or weather change. Nature changes without waiting on us. It has a set purpose and whether we are ready or not every season will change at its calculated time.

Life is like the four seasons. There are good times and bad times, there are times of great fulfillment and there are days of many disappointments. But just as we prepare for a new season with expectation of change, we have to live our lives with the same expectation and planning.

If you are single and you want marriage, you have to expect it to happen and make plans for it. Once you get in expectation mode, you will begin to do what it takes to be ready for that new season in your life.

Don’t just desire a mate; expect it as you expect the four seasons. When you expect it, you will plan for it and you will be more ready to handle it. Plan on purpose to transition from singlehood to marriage. Don’t just wait for things to happen in your life. Make it happen with definite purpose, if you want the results you expect!

This book was written to encourage and motivate you to make that transition and not get stuck in a past season without hope for change. There is nothing like wanting marriage and having a feeling of being a hopeless single who will never get married.

My objective was not to write from an exclusive perspective of my own experiences or being limited by my own way of thinking. I took the time out to question other singles on their journey and the more singles I talked to the more I realized all the things we have in common.

In the process it was a learning experience for me. And each lesson I tried to share with you within these pages. It is my ultimate attempt to be real and as transparent as I can.

On the other side of the tracks, there is so much written herein to those who don’t want marriage in the current season of their lives, but you are enjoying the season where you are now. There is nothing wrong with being satisfied with being single. It’s a great season to get to know yourself and enjoy life without interruptions and distractions.

But always keep in mind to prepare for more. Just as the seasons change, you will change as well. We all change at some point in our lives and we continually change until we die. We change our minds, our lives and we eventually may want more. Someone said it’s better to be prepared for an opportunity and not get it, that to not get an opportunity because you were not prepared for it. So I encourage you to enjoy your choice of a single lifestyle and at the same time prepare for the next level, even if you never try to get there. Enjoy the Journey as you read,

Danny Gilbert

Not a Christian book

Let me make this very clear before you read this book. This is not a Christian book. It is a book for all Single people written by a Christian. I did not write this book for Christians only and I did not write it from an exclusive Christian perspective. I want this message for general audiences.

Single, Satisfied & yet searching?

Upon hearing the title of this book several people have asked me the question concerning what appears to be a contradiction, an oxymoron:

How can someone be Single & Satisfied and yet be Searching?

What seems to be a contradiction to some is an apparent concept of relativity to others. Let me explain:

Being single is not a prison sentence and it does not mean we are always miserable, horny and lonely. Yes, there times we fall into depression, desperately want some sex and struggle with loneliness. But that’s not every day. And it’s actually less frequent than you think.

Being single has its challenges in which I will be discussing herein. But it also has its blessings. Let me illustrate. You know how you feel when you are hungry and you can freely shop and cook anything you want. You have an unlimited budget and if you decide to go out and eat, you can do that and comfortably eat at the most expensive restaurant to a cheap fast food joint. The choice is yours.

When you are single and satisfied, it’s like being hungry. You are not miserable, yet you have a need. The reason you are not miserable is because you know you can eat whatever you want at any given time. Now you might be a bit uncomfortable for the moment, but you can eat whenever you want and whatever you want.

The blessing of being single is the power to be content where we are and yet want to enjoy our contentment and peace with someone else. And that’s why we are satisfied and searching. The search is for a qualified candidate who wants what we want; that special someone to share each other’s happiness. That’s contentment with a search button.

So how can someone be single, satisfied and searching?

This is a person who is satisfied with who they are and content with where they are enough to search for someone to share their life and bring that person into their world.

This conclusion in no way does not mean that you are perfect and flawless because you are content and you have a healthy self-esteem about yourself. On the contrary, you can have flaws, character issues and even make many mistakes. But what makes you a wonderful person to be around is the fact that you are not angry with yourself and blaming others for where you are.

I believe that if a person can let go of anger, un-forgiveness and past hurts. They have the basic platform to live a content and happy life. For how can you go into a relationship carrying a virus without infecting someone else? The problem with many singles is they are searching for themselves within a relationship. They bring the virus of self-hate, anger and un-forgiveness into a new relationship. And just like a virus in the body, it will cause sickness, disease and even death. This also brings us to the question of:

How do I know when I’m ready for a relationship?

You know you are ready for a relationship when you are satisfied with who you are and you have made a decision to leave past hurts, failures and problems behind. All the other stuff is a matter of growth, learning and living. No one is perfect when it comes to our flaws, weaknesses and ignorance. We all have them, we all have issues. But there are some things that will hinder your growth and kill any relationship at the seed formation.

If you relate to other people based on the way someone else has treated, you are not ready for a new relationship. You have to take a season to get over it. If you don’t, you will destroy the new relationship because of what happened to you in the old relationship. So it is vital that you go through a season of cleaning out the junk in your trunk from the past.

I have been in several relationships where I have not done any harm at all to her and she vented anger out at me and I would scratch my head and wonder why me? What did I do? She would actually warn me against things I never even did. This was clear evidence that she brought her past issues into the relationship with me and I never even did the crime. I was being punished for what other men did to her.

So go forward, develop yourself in the time of being single. And when you like yourself to the point that you enjoy being by yourself, then you are ready to share your world. But, be careful that you don’t allow yourself to stay single too long and develop many years of selfishness to the point that you don’t want a relationship because it’s all about you.

A healthy self-esteem is a balanced personality and character. It is the person who is normal, yet human enough to be themselves without regret or shame. And yet strong enough to admit their issues and admit the fact that they want to improve and be a better person.

As I write this section of this book, I can honestly say I’m there. No I’m not there as being perfect, or flawless or finished. But I’m at the place where I have a foundation to build on that took many years of searching, loss, pain and hard work. I have so much more work to do, but the foundation of the house is built and it’s the most important first stage.

I’m at a place in my life where I like myself and I love myself. Not in a vain and selfish way, but with a balance in my attitude about it. A balance that says "I