Beneath Jalinda Stars: Jalinda Series, #2

By Vicki Connellan

Beneath Jalinda Stars is the second book in the Jalinda series.

Back on Jalinda Station for her mother's wedding to head stockman Jay, Bella finds herself coming face to face with the two people she’s been avoiding. She hasn’t seen Pete since their relationship ended eleven months ago, in which time she had found herself a new love and moved on with her life. But when life threw her a curve ball only two weeks before the wedding Bella decides to head to Jalinda Station earlier than planned. It’s back here, in the South Australian outback that Bella must face Pete, the only man she has ever loved, and her sister. How many lives would her sister ruin with her visit to Jalinda? Would she set her sights on Brock and Annie? Bella thought so. No one was safe when Steph was around, no one. What good could possibly come from seeing either of them Bella didn’t know, but she had no choice. She couldn’t miss Sophia’s wedding. It was time to put on her big girl panties and deal with it.

Pete couldn’t believe Bella, the only woman he’d ever loved, was back at Jalinda. The only course of action would be to avoid her at all costs, he’d have to, it was the only way to protect him from being hurt again. It had been eleven months since Bella ended their relationship and he didn’t have a clue why. Despite his best efforts to keep his distance from her every time he turned around they were together, mostly thanks to Annie and the other stockmen. They had no choice but to sort out their differences, and things seemed to be going along just fine until Bella’s sister arrived. Could they get past the mess that Steph had caused and give Jay and Sophia the wedding day they deserved?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Vicki Connellan
• Release date: Feb 4, 2016
• ISBN: 9780994421999

Vicki Connellan

Vicki was born in Orange, NSW. When she was two years old her family moved to Dapto, a southern suburb of Wollongong. She was kicked out of pre-school at the age of four (for reasons that she will keep to herself).   When she was sixteen she moved with her parents and two sisters (Vicki is the typically misunderstood middle child) to the ACT where, ironically she studied Child Care so she could work in a pre-school. Now, at the age of 45 she still lives in Canberra with her husband and three adult/teenage children.   Vicki works full time (not in the child care industry!) and is an avid baker. She spends her time taxiing her kids around and baking cup cakes for all the kids who constantly fill the house.    Vicki has always enjoyed writing and is now taking the time to put her stories to print.  You can contact Vicki via email at [e-mail] with any questions or  feedback on her book.  If you enjoyed the book please take the time to leave a quick review. 

Book preview

About the Author

Vicki was born in Orange then her family moved to Dapto, a southern suburb of Wollongong.

When she was sixteen she moved with her parents and two sisters to the ACT where she studied Child Care.

Now, at the age of 46 she still lives in Canberra with her husband and three adult/teenage children. 

Vicki works full time (not in the child care industry!) and is an avid baker.

She has always enjoyed writing and is now taking the time to put her stories to print.

You can contact Vicki via email at

[e-mail] with any questions or

feedback or her books or follow her author page on Facebook.

If you enjoyed the book please take the time to leave a quick review.

Chapter 1

Bella

February in Port Augusta was hot, damn hot. Was it always this hot? I looked at my watch for the fourth time in the last two minutes. My plane had arrived on time but Brock wasn’t here like Annie said he would be. Something must have happened back at Jalinda Station. God I hoped everyone was okay. My mind started racing. Mum, Jay, Annie or the kids. Annie and her baby, she was eight months pregnant with her second baby to Brock. What if something had happened to Annie or the baby? Then my mind went to the one person who I didn’t want to think about, Pete. God what if something happened to Pete?

Why did I have to think about Pete? I hadn’t seen him for eleven months. I know Mum was upset with me for not coming to Jalinda for Christmas but I just couldn’t. I was with Craig. I loved him. Well, I thought I did. Right up until two days ago when I came home and found him in our bed, with our neighbour. I looked at the ceiling and let out a breath. There hadn’t been a day gone by in the past eleven months where I hadn’t thought about Pete. What did that mean? Pete and I had a whirlwind romance after we met at Christmas just over a year ago. Even after I went home we talked every day. Phone calls, texts, emails, skype. I thought he loved me but I was wrong. My second visit to Jalinda at Easter time four months later, proved that. I arrived a day earlier than expected and went to surprise him with an early morning visit just as a Jillaroo from a neighbouring station came out of his room. God I was so stupid to think that he’d love me, to think that he’d be interested in me, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Did Craig know I thought about another man during our entire relationship? Did he sense that too? Maybe he did. Maybe that’s why he didn’t think twice about sleeping with someone else. Maybe I just needed to stop thinking.

Where the hell was Brock? I didn’t want to sit here alone with my thoughts. I hated having time to think about the last twelve months. I hated having time to think about my life and what a huge mess it was, and I hated having to be back here now. Letting Mum down at Christmas was one thing, but there was no way that I could miss her and Jay’s wedding. I’d have to see Pete, there was no way of getting out of it this time. Just as I looked at my watch again I heard someone call my name. Shit, no way was this happening. I looked up to see the one person who I planned on avoiding for the next two weeks.

Hi Bella, he looked at me as he reached for my bags. He didn’t look happy to be here either.

Hey Pete, I tried to smile but it just wouldn’t happen for me. Damn he looked good. Still the hottest stockman I’d ever laid eyes on. From the top of his hat to the tip of his boots he was all man. One hot, ovary melting man. God I wanted to jump him right here in the airport. I wanted to feel his hands on my skin, to feel him inside me once again. I shook my head. Shit, this was going to be a long, hard two weeks. I thought Brock was picking me up, the words came out a little more abrupt than I meant them to. The look on his face told me that he didn’t miss the tone in my voice either. But there was something else, confusion. Yeah, he looked confused by my reaction to him being here.

He picked up my bags and looked at me. Sorry to disappoint you, he nodded towards the door. Plane’s this way, he started walking without looking back at me.

What? Wait, I had to run to catch up to him. When I grabbed his arm he looked down at my hand and shrugged me off. You flew here, you can fly a plane?

He looked at me then kept walking. Yes Bella, I can fly a plane, he pushed through the doors and headed to the small plane at the far end of the hanger. I recognised Brock’s plane and the writing on the side indicating it belonged to Jalinda Station. By the time I’d caught up with him he had my bags on board and was waiting for me to step onto the plane. I’ll be back in a minute, he closed the little door beside me then went to the door of the hanger. I watched as he signed a clipboard, shook hands with someone, then turned back towards the plane. He didn’t look up at me as he walked back but he did take a few seconds to suck in a breath before he opened the door and climbed into the pilot’s seat. What the hell was that about? What reason could he possibly have to be mad at me? He’s the one who slept with someone else when I thought he and I had something going on. It hit me then.

Pete slept with someone else.

Craig slept with someone else.

What does that say about me?

Am I not worthy of someone loving me?

Am I not enough for a man?

Will I ever be loved by anyone?

That thought hit me like a poke in the arse with a branding iron. Buckle up, my god, no one will ever love me. I’ll never find the happy ever after like Annie has with Brock, I’ll never have the Valentine’s Day wedding like my mum and Jay. I’ll never have the house, the white picket fence and all the kids. I’m twenty six years old, not old but my clock was ticking. I was going to end up old and alone, or at the very least, settling for someone who didn’t love me all the way. Buckle up, I heard the words again but they sounded distant. Breathe, I needed to breathe. I could feel my pulse racing in my neck, I could feel my head getting light but I couldn’t breathe. I’ve never had a panic attack before. Is this what a panic attack feels like? Oh my god, now I’m panicking because I think I’m having a panic attack. What the hell is wrong with me? Shit, the voice sounded just as distant as the last one. 

I was still trying to get my head together when the door opened and I felt two big, strong hands grab me around the waist and pull me from the plane. God I'm going to be sick. I needed to sit down. At the same time as the thought came into my head someone pushed me down onto my butt so I was sitting on the steps of the plane. Put your head down between your knees, Pete was kneeling in front of me now. He didn’t look as cranky as he did before, but he still looked confused. Confused and worried. Why was he worried about me? I was staring at him, I couldn’t look away. Why was he worried about me? Bella please, put your head down before you pass out, he reached forward and gently pushed my head down to my knees.

Five minutes later I looked up into Pete’s sparkling steel blue eyes and almost lost it again. Shit, I needed to get myself under control. I needed to keep my thoughts in check and not lose it here in front of him. It was damn hard though. Those eyes felt like they were looking right into my soul, into my head and into my heart. I needed to snap out of this.

He didn’t want me.

He didn’t need me.

He didn’t love me.

I shook my head and looked away. I’m sorry, I looked down into my hands and sucked in a deep breath. I’m good to go now. I’ll be fine, when I stood I wobbled a bit on my feet and he reached for my arm. His hand felt good on my skin. Strong and warm, like a big security blanket. Jesus Bell, pull yourself together. I mentally rolled my eyes at myself then stood up straight and turned for the door of the little plane.

Bell, you’re not good to go. Let’s go inside and get you some water or something, he kept hold of my arm as he spoke. When did you last eat?

Um, I put my head down and tried to think. I hadn’t eaten anything today, did I eat yesterday? I wasn’t sure. Um, I looked up at him. I don’t know, and it was the truth. I couldn’t remember the last time I ate. I’d been at a meeting two days ago and it finished earlier than I expected. That’s why I went home early, to surprise Craig by cooking dinner. When I walked in and found him in bed pounding into the neighbour I froze. I looked away then back at Pete. I left the groceries on the floor. That was Tuesday. Two days ago. I guess I haven’t eaten since then, I sat back on the step of the plane.

Jesus Bell, he closed up the plane and took my arm, leading me towards the lobby of the small airport. Why haven’t you eaten in two days and why did you leave the groceries on the floor? You’re not making sense, he opened the door for me and ushered me through. When I felt his hand on the small of my back I pulled away. He held his hands up as if to say he got the message, he wouldn’t touch me again. Here, sit down, when we walked into the little café he pulled out a chair for me. I watched as he went to the counter and spoke to the cashier. A couple of minutes later he was back with a bottle of iced water. Here, he handed the bottle to me. Food shouldn’t be long.

Thanks, I looked around the café, I looked anywhere but at Pete.

What’s going on Bell? Why haven’t you eaten in two days? he fidgeted in his chair but he didn’t take his eyes off me.

I don’t want to talk about it, I sipped the water as I looked at him.

Does it have something to do with why you’re here two weeks earlier than everyone else? he wasn’t giving up. What did he care?

I looked at him again and rolled my eyes. Just as he was about to push for an answer the waitress sat a plate in front of me and another waitress set down two coffees and some cake. Thank you, I smiled at the waitress then looked at the food. I hope you’re planning on eating some of this, I dumped two sugars into my coffee and stirred. Pete did the same to his coffee as he watched me. It was a bit un-nerving, having those steely blue eyes on me, watching my every move. I pushed the huge slice of chocolate cake into the middle of the table then picked up my sandwich. One bite told me he’d ordered my favourite. I looked down at my plate as I ate, how could he do this to me? He had my stomach doing backflips and my heart racing. His blue eyes were still boring into me as he sipped his coffee. What? I asked between bites. God this was good, I didn’t realise how hungry I was until that first bite. He didn’t answer me, just kept sipping his coffee and chipping away at me with those steely blues. Look, I appreciate you coming all the way from Jalinda to pick me up, I appreciate the sandwich, and I appreciate your concern but I don’t want to talk about it okay, I looked away this time, I had to break eye contact with this man.

He sat forward in his seat and leant on the table before sucking in a deep breath. Look Bell, I don’t know why you’re so mad at me, I don’t know what I’ve done to piss you off, but it’s clear that you don’t want anything to do with me, he kept his eyes on me as he spoke. I don’t want to ruin Sophia and Jay’s wedding because there’s some sort of tension between us. I went away at Christmas so you wouldn’t have to feel uncomfortable at Jalinda but I’m not going to miss this wedding so we need to sort this shit out okay.

This shit, we need to sort this shit out! He’s the one who slept with someone else while we were together. He’s the one who caused this tension. I opened my mouth to say as much but then I closed it again and sucked in a breath. I wasn’t up for an argument, not here, not now. I’d let him have it back at Jalinda and once I opened up on his arse I wouldn’t stop until he knew exactly what I thought of him. "Yes Pete, we do need to sort this shit out but not here, not now. Let’s just eat so we can be on our way. I’m sure you have better things to do than spend time with me," I pushed the plate of fries towards him and got to work on finishing off my sandwich.

***

Pete

What the hell is her problem? One day we’re together, texting, emailing, skyping, calling each other every day. Then last year she turns up one day early for Easter and refuses to speak to me. I couldn’t figure her out. I thought we had something, I thought I loved her. Hell I did love her, I do love her. This is so messed up. How the hell did I end up being the one to come pick her up? She still hadn’t told me why she was mad at me, what I’d done to end our relationship but I was going to bloody well find out before she left the station this time. I should’ve demanded an explanation last time. Maybe then she wouldn’t be engaged to marry someone else right now.

I watched her eat the sandwich then she downed half the fries. Have you at least talked to your mum about your problems? I couldn’t leave it alone. Why couldn’t I leave it alone? The second she looked up at me and fixed that stone cold glare onto me I knew I should have kept my mouth shut. I held up my hands in defense. Actually forget I asked, none of my business, I twirled my hat in my hands and looked at my watch. Between having to circle a couple of times before I could land and now this Brock would no doubt start to worry about his plane. I shot off a quick text explaining that we’d had a delay but we’d be back soon.

We can go now if you want. I’m good to go, Bella stood and picked up her handbag without looking at me. She followed me back to the plane in silence but I wasn’t going anywhere until we sorted this out. Sophia was so excited to have Bella coming to stay earlier than all the other guests and I wasn’t about to let her moody as hell daughter ruin that for her.

When we got to the plane I turned to look at Bella. Look Bell, like I said back there, we need to have a discussion and work this shit out but that can wait. Right now though, I want to call a truce between us. Your mum’s so excited that you’re coming earlier than the other guests and I don’t want to ruin that for her. I can’t deliver you to her in a bad mood. I won’t do that to her, I held out my hand to Bella. Truce, she looked at my hand then up at me before she reached out and put her hand in mine. As soon as our hands connected I felt a jolt shoot through me and I was sure that my core temperature rose a degree or two. Damn I missed this woman. There hadn’t been a day gone by in the past eleven months that I hadn’t thought of her. There hadn’t been a day where I hadn’t wondered where she was, what she was doing, if she was happy. Who am I kidding, of course she was happy, she’d moved on. She was engaged to some other guy. She should have been engaged to me, I was the one who loved her. Shit, I still loved her. I pulled my hand back and gave her a quick nod. Right, let’s get going then, I opened the door and helped her into the plane.

As soon as we were in the air Bella started to relax. We were about half an hour into the flight before either of us spoke. I was fine with the silence, as uncomfortable as it was, but I could tell Bella wasn’t. She’d shifted in her seat more times than I could count. I needed to break the tension between us. Did you have a good Christmas? It had been a whole month and a bit since Christmas but it was the best I could come up with.

She looked over at me. No, not really. You?

I shrugged. It was okay. I went home to Adelaide to my parents place, no need to tell her that I looked her up while I was there. No need to tell her that I went around to see her. No need to tell her that I sat in my car outside her apartment for over an hour while I tried to get up the courage to knock on the door only to chicken out. No need to tell her that I left as soon as I saw her with him. Her fiancé. Why wasn’t your Christmas good? I asked without looking at her. I could feel the tension building again and I didn’t want that. What I wanted to do was kiss her. I wanted to kiss the breath right out of her and tell her that I loved her. Shit Granger, get yourself under control. She doesn’t want you, she has someone else.

I don’t know, it just wasn’t. I wasn’t with family, people I loved. It just didn’t feel right. I guess I wanted another Christmas like the last one I had a Jalinda, she looked out the window and that was the end of the conversation. What did she mean she wasn’t with people she loved, wasn’t she with her fiancé? I opened my mouth to ask but thought better of it. Twenty minutes later I pointed out the homestead. Can we fly over the swimming hole before we land? I love it there, it’s a beautiful spot, this time she looked at me when she spoke and for a split second I thought I saw that old sparkle in her eyes.

Sure, I got on the radio and told Jay we’d be doing a lap over the swimming hole and he gave us a wave. Bella waved to Jay then spun and smiled at me. When I smiled back she quickly turned back to the window. What the hell is going on here? She was scanning the landscape as we approached the swimming hole. I heard her let out a little gasp when it came into view.

It’s even more beautiful from up here, she looked at me quickly before turning back to the side window as she let out a sigh.

Bell are you okay? I probably shouldn’t have asked but something in my gut was telling me that there was something wrong. When she turned to look at me she shook her head as a single tear rolled down her cheek. Oh god Bell, what’s wrong? I reached to wipe the tear from her face but she grabbed hold of my hand and stopped me. Is it me? Did I do something? She kept hold of my hand as she shook her head. Well that was a huge relief. Do you want to talk about it? again she shook her head, no. Will you talk to someone about it? I looked at our hands that were still linked. Talk to your mum or Annie please, I hate seeing you hurting, please tell me you’ll talk to one of them, I looked up to see her nodding. Good, I lifted her hand to my mouth and kissed it softly before letting it go. We should land now, she nodded yes and let go of my hand.

Five minutes later we were rolling back along the runway towards the hanger shed when I looked over at Bella. She’d pulled a tissue from her bag and dried her eyes. She didn’t look at me as we came to a stop, or as I helped her from the plane. Maybe in a few days, when you’re feeling up to it, maybe we can take the horses for a ride to the swimming hole and talk, I needed to sort this thing out so I could move on. I was still in love with her, I needed closure so I could move on.

Sure, she was about to say more when Sophia called out her name.

Bella, she ran into the hanger shed. Oh my beautiful Bella, the two women hugged for the longest time. When Sophia stepped back she held Bella’s face in her hands. Oh Bella ragazza, she kissed Bella’s cheek then stepped back again. Why you cry? What is wrong? Sophia looked at me then back at Bella.

Where do you want me to take the bags? I looked at Bella and Sophia.

To the first cabin, Jay walked into the shed. Annie’s set up the first cabin for Bella, I nodded to him then headed for the cabin. The cabins were a row of little one bedroom buildings behind the main bunkhouse. There were ten in total and they really only got used when there was an overflow of stockmen for the muster or when heaps of people came to stay. Each cabin had a double bed, little kitchenette and a small but functional bathroom. I walked into the first cabin and put Bella’s bags on the bed. The place was bright and it smelt really fresh. There were fresh wildflowers on the little kitchen counter and fresh linen on the bed. The window was open and the new curtains were