Ready to Trust: Two Intimate First Time Tales
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Ready to Trust - Scarlett Knight
1988.
Ready to Trust
By Scarlett Knight
Shay slowly kicked her feet back and forth under the cerulean blue water. Soaking up the summer sun’s hot rays, she sat on the edge of the hotel swimming pool on the deep end. Beads of chlorine-scented water dripped off her waist-length black hair, making little puddles on the cement beside her. A few young children splashed around in the shallow end, their parents reclining in swimsuits on the chairs in the shade of a palm-tree.
Licking her lips, Shay watched the kids play and attempted to absorb some of their happy, carefree attitude. Her heart pounded from inside her petite chest, but it wasn’t from any sort of vigorous swim. Two hours ago, she’d left the little countryside church with Gabe, who she’d married that very day. Today she would give him what she’d been holding back, what she’d been treasuring up until this moment. Her virginity was the last bit of herself that hadn’t been tainted by the ones she loved, the ones who had abandoned her. Finally giving it up meant having to trust again.
But she was ready. She knew she was. From the time Gabe had walked into the restaurant where she’d been waitressing, she’d known he was different. His blue eyes sparkled with a kindness she wasn’t used to. Never-mind that her teenaged body had betrayed her as soon as she’d set eyes on him. It had responded to his tanned, muscled frame, hard from working construction, and his long blond hair, which he kept tied back in a ponytail. Yes, her body wanted him, though her mind cried out to hold back.
She’d been 17 at the time, and now, two years later, she found herself Gabe’s wife. He knew all about her past, about the mother who left her when Shay was only a child, how she had to then live with an indifferent aunt. Then she’d told him about that same aunt who gave her up to a great uncle, who soon after passed away. Then it was a series of foster homes. Shay had tried to trust so many people, and so many people had shown they didn’t want her. They abandoned her time after time. She’d confessed to Gabe that because of her life’s traumas, she wasn’t giving up her virginity until she knew for sure that man wouldn’t leave her. He’d understood completely.
Shay looked down at her bare left hand. She’d taken her wedding ring off