A Tattered Love

By Nickie Nalley Seidler

Riley Miller wants nothing more than to leave her past behind and never speak of it again. The damage caused by what has happened in her past, made her build walls keeping people out. Starting over isn't easy. After a move to Cape Cod to escape the dark and haunting secrets, she meets Abby and Evan. Instantly becoming best friends, shy and quiet Riley tries to break out of her shell with the help from her new friends. Just as she begins to settle into a comfortable routine, Riley meets Evan's friend Dustin.

Life as Riley knows it will never be the same.

Looking for love is the last thing on Dustin's to do list, if it's even on there at all. Living with some significant secrets of his own, Dustin tries to keep from getting in too deep with anyone. But, he finds himself drawn to the timid, yet stunning Riley. Can they both accept the past and develop a relationship? Or will the skeletons in both of their closets keep them from ever moving on?

Together they will face the challenges of weaving their pasts with the present and tackling the forces at work to keep them apart. Filled with love, suspense, unwavering friendships and a journey of discovering truths and what matters most . 

"A Tattered Love is captivating! The love Riley and Dustin share is indescribable. They have to decide if going off feelings, attraction, and love will work when everything else doesn't...." Author B.E. Laine

"A Tattered Love is a raw emotional journey of love and passion. Riley loves Dustin but feels like the challenges they face could destroy them both. Dustin knows his life includes Riley but has demons that must be faced. Together these two personify the belief that love and faith conquer all." Author Brandy Dorsch

"I never knew what would happen next. When I thought I had it figured out, the author would surprise me with another twist. If you love angst and tension filled books then this is a must read." Author Glenna Maynard

Recommended for 17+ due to mature content.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Nickie Nalley Seidler
• Release date: Oct 3, 2013
• ISBN: 9781492799603

Book preview

** Chapter 1 **

Riley

Being late was never in my vocabulary, but this particular day I had overslept. It was rare that I ever over slept, plus go through three alarms, not hearing one of them go off. I must have been dreaming about something good. I quickly pinned my unruly hair into a mop on top of my head. Then I slapped on some black eyeliner as I tried to make myself somewhat presentable. I tugged on a pair of my skinny jeans, grabbed a white tank top from my closet, and tossed it over my head. This was the day of my ninety-day review at Eddie’s Seaside Pub, and this was not how I had pictured my day starting. I flew in the door with only a minute to spare.

Girl, you were about to be in some deep trouble if you didn’t just fly through that door. What were you thinking? Abby looked at me as she threw me an apron because apparently, I forgot to bring mine.

Thanks. I rolled my eyes and swiped the time clock.

Riley Miller, my office, please. The voice was overbearing and frantic. I almost wanted to cover my ears, duck under a table, and disappear somewhere far away. I prayed Robert didn’t fire me for this. I couldn’t afford to be without a job. I could barely pay my rent now. Shit that was due yesterday!

I turned on my heel and darted into his overly bright office.

Glad you can make it to work. With only a minute to spare, too. He said ferociously.

I’m so sorry, sir. It won’t happen again. It’s rare I do not hear three alarms, but next time I’ll set ten. I promise. I stood there fidgeting.

Sit. Robert demanded as he continued to stare at the paper in front of him.

I sat down in the black leather chair that faced his old crooked desk. I sat up straight without slouching, as I wanted to portray myself as professional as possible.

Miss Miller, here is your review. He handed me three pieces of paper as he looked at me closely before beginning to lecture me. I gave you a remarkable review. I believe you’re a hard worker and a great asset to Eddie’s Seaside Pub. You make relationships with our customers, and that makes them want to come back. Seeing your passion and drive impresses me. He sighed. You see, there are three things that I find important about running a business. First, that the food and the drinks are excellent and top notch. Second, the service is outstanding and personable. Third, is cleanliness, keeping this place spic and span. You contribute to each of these extremely well, and then some, Miss Miller.

Well, thank you, Mr. Young. I’ll make sure I don’t disappoint you.

Now be sure you don’t make a habit of flying in the door at the last minute. You know its mandatory for our servers to be here fifteen minutes before their shift. You understand that, Miss Miller, correct?

Yes, sir. Please, call me Riley.

Well, Riley, you’re officially off your probationary period here at Eddie’s Seaside Pub. Now get back to work. The afternoon rush is about to start.

Great! Thanks, Mr. Young! I got up from the chair and headed quickly out of his office and back to the dining room. Abby was waiting on somebody, so I decided to cool it for a second. They’re strict here at Eddie’s because it’s a rich town, and rich people don’t like poor service. Three times, you’re late and you’re fired. I had been on probation so he could fire me for being late once! Especially, being late on my review day.

Abby started walking toward the kitchen to where I was standing. I was certain she was going to ream my ass because it would be her ass on the line if I screwed up. Abby was my new best friend. We were alike in so many ways, but mainly I knew I could trust her. She was adorable, funny, and very down to earth. She lived in the same complex as I, and that’s how we met. We were walking our dogs and ran into each other when Cooper got away from me and decided to go sniff her dog’s rear end. We then began talking, and just connected. Abby was probably the best thing in my life. She helped me get everything situated and showed me around town. Cape Cod was a new place for me to start over, and it had been great. One thing I knew for sure is that I didn’t miss home.

So, you still got a job, or were you standing here waiting for me to hug you goodbye?

Yes, I still have my job. He didn’t write me up, either.

Good. I was worried he might fire you for pulling a stunt like that on your review day. Abby rolled her hazel eyes as she looked back to the computer screen, quickly tapping away, entering in a new order for her table.

I overslept. Bad timing, I guess. I looked around the restaurant and then focused on the outside. It was then that I noticed a bunch of people walking toward the door.

Here comes the rush. Kate called in sick, by the way, so we’re hosting and serving today. Abby rushed away to her table.

Freaking awesome. I pretended to jump for joy, and then strolled over to the door to begin seating people. Not only was there the usual rush, but a sightseeing tour bus came to a stop just outside of the pub, and filled all of our tables. The day couldn’t get any better.

After the crowds headed out, and the restaurant finally settled down, Abby came up behind me, tapping me on the shoulder. I turned around, and she had her apron off.

Where are you going? I asked.

Take a look at the clock. It’s closing time, girl.

I hadn’t had time to pay attention to the time, but I realized she was right. It was past closing time. Wow, today flew by.

Pizza tonight at our place, Evan’s buying. You coming by?

Oh, I don’t know, I’m pretty exhausted.

Riley, come on, its Friday! Come by, it’ll be fun. Evan’s having some of his friends come, too. Abby begged.

Fine, see you in a few. I just need to shower and then I’ll be over.

Fantastic! Abby yelled, and she walked out of the restaurant right into Evan’s arms as he had been waiting for her.

If it weren’t for Abby and making me feel comfortable, I probably would have moved back home. Living with Granny would be the worst-case scenario, even as much as I loved my Granny.

I walked home, and Cooper was waiting for me by the door, as usual. He was a brown lab with the most beautiful brown eyes I’d ever seen on a dog. He was my life, and he knew it. I spent most of my nights, if not at Abby’s, then at home with Cooper.

Hey, Coop. Glad to see you too, my boo, I said to the dog as he wagged his tail in pure excitement. Cooper just turned one last week. He’s such a restless dog with so much energy that he didn’t know what to do with it.

I grabbed his spike leash, which was very intimidating, and took him for a good long walk. I let him do his duty, took out the tennis ball from my purse, and played with him for a few minutes to burn some of that energy. I knew he needed it after being cooped up in the apartment all day. He probably slept all day, too. So he would not be happy that I planned to leave him again tonight. Although, I did promise him I would not be long.

I ran back with Cooper to the apartment, unhooked his leash, and he immediately ran to his water bowl. I fixed Cooper his dinner while he sat there wagging his tail as he waited for me to finish. Good boy, I said when I placed his bowl back on the floor. I stretched my arms out and started yawning. Today had been a crazy ass day. All I wanted to do was shower and get out of these clothes.

The warm water felt wonderful as it rolled down my body. Once finished, feeling clean again, I dressed in some black leggings and put on an orange hoodie. I brushed my hair out and left it wet. What the hell, I am just going to Abby’s, so I said goodbye to Cooper and headed over to her apartment.

Knock, knock, I yelled outside the door, knocking as I said it.

Come on in! Evan yelled.

Evan was Abby’s boyfriend. He was pretty fine looking if I had to say so myself. She caught a good catch, that’s for sure. He was tall, tattooed, and slender with a black Mohawk. He wore a lot of sweatshirts and jeans, and he had a lip ring in all the time. It suited him, and it definitely suited Abby’s taste. Abby was a good match for him, equally nice looking. Abby was short and toned with a slight tan, and short to her chin natural red hair that she was very proud of, too.

Girl, get your ass in here, Abby yelled from the kitchen. I walked toward the kitchen and was greeted by her dog, Bones, a small black rat terrier. I noticed a few people sitting in the living area but didn’t pay too much attention. I figured they were Evans’ friends.

Her kitchen was your average kitchen, plain wood cabinets and a flat black counter top. It wasn’t overly big since this was apartment living, but it was suitable for them. I had the same kitchen, and it worked just great for me, too.

Hey, I’m here, I’m here. Sorry I had to keep Coop out for a while and let him burn off some energy, I sighed. So, something smells good. I thought Evan was getting pizza?

Abby bumped her ass into mine playfully. I’m making some appetizers while we wait on the pizza. Apparently, Luke’s Pizza is busy tonight, and it’s an hour and a half wait for four extra large pizzas. She smiled at me, opened the oven, and took out some garlic bread.

Smells delish. I bumped my ass back at her.

Would you two lesbians knock it off in there? Evan shimmied in between us. You going to eat some pizza, Riley-smiley? Evan teased.

I’m here, aren’t I? I gave Evan my ‘I’m going to kick your ass if you call me that again’ look.

Come on, I’ll introduce you to the guys. Evan grabbed my hand and forced me to go in the room with him.

Evan pointed at the guys and went down the row from left to right on the couch.

Riley, this is Joe, Dustin, and Frank. Guys, this is Riley, she works with Abs.

Evan had hot friends, but one really caught my eye. He stood out as if there were no one else in the room. I suddenly wished I had worn something different, and maybe took some time to do my hair. He had my mouth watering, almost drooling, with all those tats that swept around his muscles. My hands were sweaty, dying to tug and pull on his hair. Wow, he was pure bad boy dressing up in pretty clothing and amiable smiles.

Sup? Joe said.

Pleasure. Frank said.

Hey. Dustin added.

Hi, guys. Nice to meet you. I turned quickly around and headed back to the kitchen with Abby. Why didn’t you tell me they were going to be good-looking? I whispered as I nudged Abby in the side.

Abby looked at me and busted out laughing. I have a bathroom, you know. Go shape up. She smiled. Not like they are going to care. They’re pretty laid back, Ry. Chill out.

I grabbed my hair and pulled it up into a messy bun. I sat at the kitchen table and chatted with Abby while we waited for our pizza to arrive. It seemed like a century went by before the doorbell finally rang. Evan rushed to the door and paid the guy for the pizzas. His friend, Dustin, went to help. Dustin came in the kitchen with Evan, pizzas in hand. Just as I went to grab for a paper plate, Dustin reached for one, too. His hand touched mine, making me do a double take at Evan’s friend. Damn, he’s gorgeous.

Go ahead, sorry, I said blushing red.

No, ladies first, my bad. He looked at me. For a second, we just looked at each other before I finally snapped out of it. Wow, he has some amazing ocean blue eyes and a well-defined face. His arms were big and looked like they could be mighty strong as his tight cotton polo shirt accentuated his chest.

Thanks. I reached for my plate, and then added a slice of pizza to it.

I know you’re going to eat more than that, right? Dustin said with a smirk on his face.

I’m pretty sure you don’t have to worry about that. I innocently smiled back.

Dustin was hot. I didn’t really want to admit it, but I was finding myself clearly attracted to him. I’m sure somebody as good-looking as he was, had a girlfriend. Then the question rendered—well, where is she then? Why isn’t she here? The man was buff with some hot-ass tattoos wrapped around his arms. I’m sure I could feel safe and comfortable in them.

I’m going to step outside for a smoke, care to join? I bravely asked.

Smoking is bad for you, but I guess I’ll join you just so you’re not alone.

Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve heard that. I rolled my eyes, grabbed my smokes, and headed out to the patio where Dustin followed.

I walked out and leaned against the brick wall. There was one thing about being a waitress that killed me, and that was being on my feet all day. I let out a heavy sigh. I could use a good freaking foot massage. Then I lit up.

So, your name is Riley, right? Dustin leaned on the glass patio door. He stared at me with those intense eyes, taking in something I couldn't see. When his lips parted, all I could do was think about kissing him. Would he be gentle or demanding? He laughed, breaking me from my thoughts. I blushed. Sorry, what did you say?

You’re name, Riley, right? He smirked.

Yup, I’m Riley. I smiled.

Where you from, Riley?

All over.

All over?

My dad was in the army, we traveled quite a bit. Born in Arizona though. I took a puff on my cigarette.

Wow. That must have been cool traveling all over the place.

Yeah, maybe to some people, but I just wanted a place I could call home, which never really happened until a few years ago.

So, what brings you to Cape Cod?

I paused. Honestly, I just needed to pick somewhere, and I randomly picked here, mainly because it’s somewhere that I actually haven’t been. I was honest.

This Dustin guy sure liked to dig for information. Yet talking about my past made me nervous. I didn’t want to say anything that would give any details away.

What about you? I asked.

Born and raised here. I just moved out from my parent’s house, I live across town at the Sheldon apartments.

Sweet. Are those nice apartments? Are you in college?

Yeah, pretty nice for what I pay. No, I finished college last year.

What do you do? I interrogated him back with questions.

I’m a service advisor at a dealership in town.

Wow, sounds neat.

Pays the bills. I want to become a cop someday.

Nice. I could totally picture him in a police uniform. His tall height had to be six-foot-two, and his masculine broad shoulders brought my eyes to his tone build. Then my eyes were brought down to his hips and his long legs. I could totally picture it. With perfect black hair and the slightest bit of gel in it to make it spiky, he was wearing his hair just the way I liked it. I even liked how he wore a polo shirt and jeans, as funny as that sounds. Even though his shirt looks liked it was about to rip open from his muscles.

You work with Abby?

Yeah, she got me the job at Eddie’s place. It’s all right. The boss is a prick, but it’s a job. Just wish it paid more. I shrugged my shoulders.

Great food there? He smiled his all-American white boy smile.

They do. You should come in and eat sometime. I puffed the last drag of my cigarette and put it out in an ashtray.

Maybe I will. He smiled blocking the door.

I’m all done with my cigarette. I gestured with my hand that we could go in.

I know. He took his hand and rubbed his chin. I wasn’t done talking to you, though.

What can you possibly want to talk to me about? I asked.

Well, you’re beautiful, there’s no question about that.

I blushed, and I’m sure the color red invaded my entire face. Did he just call me beautiful?

Thank you, I said shyly.

Are you— Then he hesitated. Are you single?

Indeed, I am. In fact, I’ve only been out here for four months. Haven’t really been exploring my options.

Good to know. He grinned and moved away from the door. I walked passed him, patting him on the shoulder as I stepped back into the apartment.

The rest of the night went great. Abby brought out the guitar hero, and we started playing and goofing around. I felt like there was a serious attraction between Dustin and me, but we kept our distance the rest of the night. I had a good time playing games and laughing. It had been a while since I had a night like that to enjoy. I knew Cooper was waiting for me, and I knew it was time to head home as it was close to one a.m.

Well, everybody, I had a great time tonight, but I need to head upstairs and get some rest for work tomorrow. Lucky Abby here is off. I don’t get that luxury. I smirked at Abby. Thanks, Evan, for the pizza. I gave him a quick hug and then to Abby as I made my way to the door as I grabbed my smokes and keys.

Bye, girl. I’m sure I’ll see you and Coop tomorrow sometime. Have a good night. Thanks for coming by! Abby hugged me and then closed the door behind me. I started to walk toward my apartment when I noticed Dustin standing in front of me in the hallway.

Can I walk you home? He asked with a goofy smile on his face.

You don’t have to as I’m perfectly capable.

But I’d really love it if you did!

I’d like to, though.

I put my hands up in the ‘I give in’ motion. Ok. Right this way. I headed past him and started to walk up the cement stairs making my way down the hotel looking hallway to my cozy apartment.

This is me. I pointed to my door that read 209 on a wooden plaque.

Dustin took a deep breath and let it out. Can I see you again?

He’s really pushy, isn’t he?

I played with a loose strand of my hair and sighed. Dustin, I’m going to be honest with you. I’m not sure what I want with my life right now. It’s crazy. I work many hours at the restaurant, and I’m barely able to get by. I don’t get out much, and I definitely haven’t hung out with a guy, let alone dated anyone, in a really long time.

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I just asked if I could see you again. Calm down. I’m not asking you to marry me or anything. He joked as he tried to make me laugh.

Yes, you can see me again. Hand me your phone. I giggled trying hard not to look nervous. Trying even harder not to pounce on this beautiful man standing right in front of me.

I typed my name and number into his phone. I work tomorrow from eleven to eight. It’s my long shift. I really need to get some sleep. I smiled my Colgate smile.

Goodnight, Riley. He lifted my hand and kissed the top of it.

The touch of his lips on my hand made my heart palpitate. It sent butterflies through my stomach. I can’t believe all that from a little peck on my hand.

Goodnight, Dustin. Thanks for walking me upstairs.

Anytime. He winked at me.

I unlocked my apartment door, and when I walked in, Cooper was right at my feet, as usual. I closed the door and stood there for a minute. I was a little shocked by what had just happened. There was a guy interested in me? Miss Riley Miller? I didn’t know if I could handle a boyfriend with my crazy work schedule, though.

I took Cooper outside real quick to let him do his business, and then hurried back in the house. I jumped in my pajamas and hit the bed, clutching my pillow and shutting my eyes. I was out in a heartbeat.

** chapter 2 **

Dustin

I ran down the hallway, flew down the stairs, and returned to Evan and Abby’s apartment. I walked in the door, and they hadn’t even noticed I had been gone. I was a little devious, and when I knew they were walking Riley out, I slipped out to the patio, and came around to approach her. I didn’t want them to know I was interested in her yet. I figured they might not like it. However, at this point, I really didn’t care. She was perfect, she was just my type, and I hoped I could be her type. She seemed to be a bit timid. Her body was smoking hot, though. She was about average height with long, and I mean long, black hair almost midway down her back, with the cutest small face and big brown eyes, and the most perfect white teeth I had ever seen. She was gorgeous. I have a feeling any guy would have been lucky to have her. That’s why I decided to try my damnedest to get her before any other guy swept her away. I didn’t know why I was thinking that way. Something about her drove me a little wild inside, even though I had told myself once that I didn’t want to ever love again.

Yo, Evan. I yelled. Any more beer in the fridge? I signaled for him to toss me one.

Yeah, dude. Coming right up. Evan reached in the fridge, walked his way over to the sunken couch, and handed me a Busch.

Thanks, man.

No problem, Evan added.

Damn, drinking this beer reminded me of how much I really hate drinking Busch. I didn’t drink all night. I was telling myself I wouldn’t and I gave in because of being frustrated about what to do about Riley. I really wanted to make a superior effort, but she doesn’t seem like she wants a boyfriend. However, I knew I wanted her. My cell phone went off, suddenly breaking my train of thought. I looked down at it, silently cursing. It’s fucking Carla.

Yeah? I answered my phone with a question. Nothing after one in the morning is ever going to be a good phone call.

I need a ride. Carla spat.

Well, I’m fucking busy at Evan’s right now.

Dude, just give me a fucking ride home, ok? I’m not in the mood for your shit, Dustin. I just need a damn ride right now.

Where are you? I sighed, royally pissed off.

At the beach, usual spot. Look, just hurry up, ok? She sniffled.

I’m on my way, I said in a ‘tired of this shit’ voice and hung up.

I got up off the couch, and made my way over to the kitchen. Evan, man, I need to bounce. Thanks for the pizza and beer. Great night, dude! I’ll see ya soon. I shook Evan’s hand and gave Abby a hug. Nice to see you, too, Abby. Goodnight, all! I looked around the room and waved at Frank and Joe.

After my semi-short drive to the beach, I pulled into the parking lot and noticed Carla sitting out on the rock ahead of me. I flashed my lights, but she had to have known it was me by the roar of my exhaust. She got off the rock and started making her way toward the car. When she was in better view, I noticed her shirt was ripped. I threw the car in neutral, forcing the parking brake up. I got out of the car and darted over to her.

What the hell happened, Carla? Why is your shirt ripped? I demanded. After looking at her eyes, I could see she had been crying. That just made me even more furious. Damn it, Carla. Tell me what happened, I insisted.

I said no. I made sure I said no, she cried out.

Who did this to you? I asked with rage in my voice.

I looked at Carla, my younger sister. She looked awful, and I wondered where her friends were. Carla was shorter than I was, and had light brown hair that was cut short to her chin in a bob-like haircut. She was slim and slender with an athletic build, and a love for softball. She had just turned nineteen, and she thought she ruled the world. She had many friends. Living with our parents, though, she had yet to find a job.

Just take me home, I’m not telling you. You won’t leave it alone, and then the next thing I know, he’s going to do it again because my big brother aggravated him. So it’ll just make him even more pissed that I told him to stop. She sobbed uncontrollably.

Carla Lee Boyd, I’m not leaving here until you fucking tell me who did this to you? I shook her by the shoulders demanding information.

Peter Brent. He tried forcing me, and I made him stop. Now take me home and leave that asshole alone, she snapped.

Get in the car, I demanded as I let the anger get the best of me.

I’ll kill him!

Carla got in the car and slammed the door. I got in the driver’s side and peeled off toward my parent’s house. I reached in the back and grabbed my t-shirt that had been sitting back there for some time. Put this on.

Don’t tell Mom and Dad. I swear, Dustin, I’ll make your life a living hell.

Put the damn shirt on, Carla. I’m not going to tell them, but I am going to have a little chat with Mr. Brent. My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly

Reviews for A Tattered Love

[iloveladyporn · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This isn't a very long book only 181 pages but let me tell you Author Lola Stark has packed it all in!
Scarlett & Mace are both guarded and it takes awhile for their walls to completley come down. When Scarlett is all in Mace messes things up. Now he has to fight like hell to get her back and Scarlett isn't easlily swayed back. Some good drama. Lots of hot juicy steamy sex.
Fabulous Ending for Scarlett & Mace but it sets us up for the next book "Conflicted Love" which goodreads says will be out Jan.

[tala2cubs · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Loved this story. Some serious laugh out load moments, like all of ch.7. It also had great sex. A heroine and Hero with issues that are dealt with realistically. Will write a full review in a bit.

[Aury · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

??????? it was amazing I loved it ??♥️

[readunderthemoon · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

Long drawn out drama filled poorly written cliché filled