Inhale Exhale

By Sarah M. Ross

Jillian had a plan: celebrate the end of her first year of college with an amazing summer full of beaches, barbeques, and bonfires. When her mom insists she needs a summer job, and her boyfriend spends more time with his band than with her, Jillian’s plans go down the drain.

Grant had a plan: finish his Masters, get a great job at Google, and get the hell out of Georgia. He might be giving up some of the fun of his youth, but he knows his all work and no play method would be worth it when his dreams came true.

But things never go according to plan.

When temptation brings them together and tragedy tears them apart, Jillian and Grant will be forced to choose: fight for their dreams, or fight for each other.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sarah M. Ross
• Release date: May 5, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301938551

Sarah M. Ross

I started my obsession with reading at an early age, getting in trouble for sneaking BabySitter Club and Nancy Drew books into math class in elementary school. I would read any fiction book I could get my hands on. I knew it was an addiction when instead of grounding me from TV or music, my mom would take away my books as punishment (The Horror!). My love of all things paranormal was inspired by my good friend Laurie, who convinced me that books with vampires, witches, and all things shifter were amazing. After a little reluctance, I gave it a shot with the Sookie Stackhouse books, realized she was right, and the rest was history. I grew up in Pittsburgh, graduated from The University of Pittsburgh with my degree in English, and taught 8th graders to love reading as much as I do for several years. I will always be a proud member of the Steelers Nation, but I couldn't take the cold and moved my frozen tush to Florida where I now live with my family and two cats. You will find me now with my trusty Kindle in hand and toes in the sand! When I'm not writing or reading, I am probably partaking in my favorite vice: sunbathing. I know it's wrong, but I love the feeling on the hot sun on my skin and could lay in it for hours. I do live in Florida for a reason!

Book preview

Prologue

This is your fault, you stupid son-of-a-bitch!

I twisted out of the arms holding me back and rammed my fist in his face again, seeing nothing but red. I continued to pound the bastard’s face until I was once again pulled off him.

I swear to God, if you ever so much as even think about stepping in the same zip code as her ever again, I will rip out your spine and feed it to you before breaking every bone in your body.

The prick lay on the ground, his chest heaving as he tried to take a ragged breath. Red, mucus-streaked blood dripped out of his mouth and down his chin. He spat out a tooth, spraying blood on the ground at my feet. He never bothered to try to stand back up. It was a smart decision on his part, because I’d just knock him back down.

Dude, enough! JT tightened his grip on my arms as blood dripped from my knuckles.

The fucker’s eyes held genuine remorse as he glanced around the room at each of us. I had no idea this would happen. She wasn’t supposed to do that. They weren’t supposed to hurt her. I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry for everything, he moaned.

The words and his regret weren’t enough to make up for his actions, but before I could strike again, he whispered, Please, tell me she’s going to be okay. That she’s not…

The words broke me. My vision blurred behind the tears that welled in my eyes. Was she going to...? She couldn’t…? How did this happen? How did I let myself fail to protect her? She trusted me, and I let her down. I wanted to blame him, but really I had no one to blame but myself. I failed her.

My shoulders slumped as all my anger turned to fear. Fear for her. Fear of a future without her in it. I needed to see her, needed to make sure she was okay. But that wasn’t possible now. The only thing I could do was wait. Sit and wait for however this turned out.

Because no matter what happened, by the end of tonight my life would never be the same again.

Chapter One

When I was about six, my dad had begun to call me his little Monkee. People always assumed I was a tomboy who climbed trees, but that wasn’t it at all. No, Daddy called me that because I was always daydreaming. His little Daydream Believer, just like the song. I was always in my head more than I was in the world. And today was no exception. But today, I wasn’t daydreaming; I was trying to relive a dream from last night.

With the top of the VW Bug convertible down, the wind rushed through my ears, drowning out the chatter around me as my eyes slid shut. I turned up toward the sun, enjoying the heat on my face as my long, brown hair whipped around me and tangled. It would be impossible to tame it later, but it felt so good to let go of everything, and I didn’t want the feeling to end.

Hey! Are you even listening? Ava chastised, playfully shoving my shoulder to get my attention. I hadn’t really been paying attention to the conversation of my best friends beside me, but they were used to it by now. Hello? Earth to Jillian!

I shook my head, bringing myself out of my thoughts and back into the present. Grabbing a hair tie from around the stick shift, I threw my hair into a messy bun until I could brush it out later. I wanted to leave it free to give the sun a chance to lighten it a few shades like it did every summer, but I’d save that for another day.

I’m sorry, Ava.

Daydreaming again?

Sort of. I was thinking about this dream I had last night. I paused for a moment, mustering the courage to ask the question that had been weighing on my mind since I woke up five hours earlier. It sounded so stupid in my head; I knew it would sound even worse out loud. But these were my best friends, and I needed to talk this out before I went crazy.

Have you ever woken up from a dream and thought it really happened?

Yeah, every time I dream about me and Chris Hemsworth. Trish sighed, thinking of her favorite fictional boyfriend.

No, I mean, like the dream was trying to tell you something. Send a message. I groaned. This was sounding even stupider than I thought, and nothing was coming out right. What I’m trying to ask is, do you believe dreams can be prophetic?

Ava turned down the sounds of Bruno Mars blasting through the speakers. Huh? Like what, you’re some kind of fortune teller now? What exactly was that dream about? Am I going to win the lottery?

I don’t remember a lot of the specifics, but I can’t shake this feeling I was with someone else.

From the backseat, Trish pulled her feet up and sat on them, then leaned forward, resting her elbows on my headrest. You mean someone other than Christian?

Ava gasped, and the car swerved a little onto the shoulder before she righted it. She always was the most dramatic one of our trio. Even her looks were striking, with her pitch-black hair cut in a blunt bob that angled down, highlighting her high cheekbones and her signature cherry red, pouty lips. That’s insane! You and Christian have been together since we were sophomores in high school. He loves you like crazy. And with your four-year anniversary coming up at the end of the summer, I’m pretty sure he’s going to pop the question.

I frowned. Huh, that should not be my first reaction to the thought of my boyfriend proposing. I shook off the errant thought. Of course I was excited. It was just this stupid dream that made me frown.

I know, I know. And I love him, too. It was a stupid dream. Never mind. Forget I brought it up.

Oh no, Trish clucked. You’re not getting out of it that easily. This sounds like a juicy dream, so spill it, missy!

It was nothing. Really. I turned to look back out the window but knew neither Trish nor Ava would let it rest at that. I wasn’t a good enough liar to pull it off, and they knew me too well. I sighed. Might as well get this over with. It was…intense. We were holding hands walking down the beach over by the lighthouse, and then he stopped and turned me, staring in my eyes. But the thing was, it wasn’t Christian. It was someone else. And we were connected in a way I’ve never felt before.

Trish balked in the backseat, placing her hands on her ample hips and rolling her baby blues at me. Pfft! What, like soul mates? Those only exist in rom-coms and cheesy romance novels.

I shook my head, closing my eyes to try to picture the face that hung just outside my memory. I wanted to capture the feelings of the dream once more—if only for a second.

No, not soul mates. You know I don’t believe in those. It was more like we were completely compatible. Like he got me, and we clicked together. Pieces of a puzzle or something.

But you and Christian have that, sweetie. You guys are perfect together, Ava reassured me.

Yeah, you’re right. We are. I smiled, trying to convince myself the stupid dream meant nothing. Christian and I were great together, everyone said so. Sure, there were a few things I would change about him if I could—things that worried me about our future—but all couples had that. After all, no one was perfect. Like I said, it’s stupid. It didn’t mean anything. I tried to keep my tone light, indifferent even, but I couldn’t shake the hint of longing that snuck in.

So, was this dream guy at least a hottie? Trish asked from the backseat, wagging her eyebrows at me.

Heat flushed my face, and I turned away to hide from Trish’s view. Um, I don’t remember, I lied. It was a partial lie. I didn’t remember what the guy in my dream looked like, but I remember how my body tightened when our eyes met—that intense heat flared to life within me and brought an almost unquenchable sense of longing as we moved closer together.

I wished I could go back to sleep right now and dream about him again. I tried falling back asleep after waking up with my heart racing, but it was impossible. The dream was just out of my reach when I closed my eyes, even when I tried to remember the quickly fading details. I feel like Tantalus, I thought.

Girl, you can try to hide the blush all you want. We’ve been friends for too long for me not to see through that. Spill. And this time, I want all the juicy details. This must have been one hell of a dream to make you turn the shade of a ripe tomato.

I continued to attempt to hide the evidence, but Trish would have none of it. She began poking me under the ribs—the spot she knew I was most ticklish. She knew I had no defenses against tickling. I squealed, bending over to try to protect the sensitive area, but she was unrelenting.

Okay, okay! I cried, tears streaming down my face. I give up. Uncle! I’ll tell you, stop tickling me, please.

Trish relented, resuming her seat in the back of the car and pumping her arms triumphantly.

I already told you, I don’t remember any of the specific details. I only remember how being with him made me feel. It was like… I paused, trying to find the right words. I’d never wanted to be with someone so badly in my entire life.

Wow, it sounds intense. So now you think this dream is going to come true? Ava made the turn into the mall entrance. It was packed, as usual for a Saturday, so we began the hunt for a spot to park.

When I woke up this morning, I had this feeling it was more than a dream, like it was a metaphor or something. Like there was a message there. I closed my eyes, trying once again to picture his face. Had I seen him somewhere before? Did that guy really exist? It’s totally crazy, but it felt so real. If I hadn’t woken up next to Christian, I would have sworn it really happened.

Did you tell him anything about it?

God, no! How awkward would that conversation have been? ‘Um, hun, I know we’ve been together for a long time now, but I have the hots for an imaginary guy I dreamt about.’ I rolled my eyes. I can see that going over real well.

Trish snorted. Ava and I both laughed at our crazy friend as Ava finally found and pulled into a spot and we filed out of the car. The three of us had been friends for as long as I could remember. Ava’s grandma lived on the same street as Trish and me, and she was the only one in the neighborhood with a pool. With the intense South Georgia heat, we’d have been friends with her if she was the Jolly Green Giant or had a tail. But we’d lucked out because she was awesome.

Now, we’d all completed our first year at Georgia State University, and it was time to reward ourselves with some retail therapy. Since there was only one mall in our small suburban town outside of Brunswick, Georgia, we had been regulars here since middle school. We did everything at this mall: got our nails done, flirted with boys, saw movies, and hung out. Today, we were on the hunt for new shoes.

So your mom got you a job for the summer, too? Trish asked as she tried on a new pair of sandals, holding her foot out in front of her as she inspected how they looked from every angle. And here I was looking forward to sleeping in for a change.

Trish had an unhealthy love of shoes, more than anyone I knew. She always said it was the one thing she didn’t have to worry about fitting when her weight yo-yoed, which it often did. With the start of a new summer and bathing suit season, I was sure she was about to begin another crash diet, if she hadn’t done so already. Ava and I loved her no matter how she looked, and she always had a string of guys who lusted after her curvaceous body. She exuded self-confidence in public, but her closest friends saw through that. She always said she wanted to be super skinny like Ava, or petite like me. I had no idea why. I mean, at least she had boobs that required a bra.

Trish, none of your classes this semester started before noon. You slept in every day! Ava pulled one of the nylon footies out of the box the store provided and flung it like a slingshot at Trish.

Yeah, but when you go to bed at five AM, it’s not really sleeping in, is it?

Anyway, I interrupted my friends before they could continue their footie war and get us kicked out of the store. Yes, my mom got me this job answering phones or something. One of her friends from church is the manager and had an opening. I start tomorrow. I don’t even get more than a week’s vacation before I’m back at it.

I kicked off the nude peep-toe pumps I was ogling and replaced them in the box. Maybe after my first paycheck I could afford the designer label, but today they would not be coming home with me.

Trish saw my defeated face and wrapped me in a hug. Well, we still have two days to enjoy our freedom, so enough about dreams and work. We have some shoes to buy!

Chapter Two

Welcome to Allegro Corporation, Jillian. I’m Connie, the senior administrative assistant here. We’re so happy to have you aboard this summer. Your mother talks about you all the time.

I smiled at the older, heavyset woman as she showed me around. The woman’s kitten heels clicked loudly as we walked. She paused every few seconds as she said hey to another co-worker and asked about their weekend. Connie cheerfully pointed out the copy machine, coffee maker, and mailroom.

This woman is way too cheerful for eight o’clock in the morning, I thought. But at least I know where the coffee maker is now.

I’m so grateful you had a spot here for me, Connie. But forgive me, my mom didn’t really explain to me what exactly I would be doing here.

Allegro is an advertising agency specializing in Internet advertisements and sales. We’re one of the largest employers here in Brunswick, with about six-hundred employees throughout the company. You are going to be answering phones and transferring calls for the sales department. It’s quite simple really. She paused as we entered a bland cubicle at the end of a row. The cubicles to my left and right were empty, and the closest person was only in shouting distance. It appeared I would be all alone.

Well, here we are. We’ll hire a few temps throughout the summer, so you won’t be alone for long. I glanced around my workstation. It was empty save for a computer, chair, and phone. The phone was massive, with dozens of little green and red lights blinking away like a Christmas tree.

I’ll send someone over to show you the ropes, but basically, you answer the calls using our standard greeting and look up the status of the person the caller wishes to speak to using the computer directory. If they’re available, transfer the call. If they’re out, transfer to voicemail and message the rep. The sales department is the largest department with over two hundred and fifty people, so it might seem overwhelming at first, but I’m sure you’ll pick it up in no time.

My stomach tightened as I watched the array of lights twinkle. Unlike most tech-savvy kids my age, I was terrible with electronics. I’d graduated in the top ten percent of my high school, but was a complete moron when it came to computers, let alone fancy, hi-tech phones with blinking, angry lights that cautioned what I’d find on the other end. I’d accidentally broken three of my mom’s laptops somehow, and the Geek Squad cringed when they saw me walk into the store. I still didn’t have a smart phone because I was afraid I’d break it. I couldn’t even hook up my DVR correctly without getting Christian to fix it.

What If I can’t handle all the calls? Or I screw up? My mom called in a favor to get me this job; I can’t let her down or embarrass her by failing. In a small town like this, everyone would know how badly I’d failed before she could even make it home. I swallowed down the lump in my throat and squared my shoulders, putting on a fake bright smile.

It shouldn’t be a problem at all. I’m looking forward to the challenge.

I hoped speaking the words out loud would help instill some confidence, but I felt like a fraud.

Well, if you need anything, call me. My extension’s in the directory. I’ll send Temperance right over to give you a quick demonstration, and someone from IT should be by to set you up with a username and password.

I wasn’t given a chance to respond before someone called Connie over the intercom, and she left, heels clicking merrily away. I sat alone in the cubicle for a few minutes, trying to read the tiny buttons on the phone without much success when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

You must be Jillian, a cheerful woman greeted.

Why is everyone so happy this early in the morning, I groaned in my head.

She wore a sunny yellow top with white lace adorning the collar and a pleated black skirt that fell below her knee. She was probably in her late thirties, but with her lack of makeup she appeared older. I’m Temperance. I’m going to show you how all this craziness works. How familiar are you with the Cisco Unified IP phone system?

Um, not at all. I’ve never worked in an office before. The past couple of years I was a camp counselor, and I babysat, so this is all kind of new to me. Temperance pursed her lips disapprovingly. I looked down at my feet, lifting my hand to my mouth as I bit the side of