Winners and Losers

By Steven Arnett

Set in a small southern Michigan city in the early 1990s, Winners and Losers is a rollicking dark comedy starring Tom Slotrak, a young man who wins the jackpot in the Michigan Lottery and the crazy and (sometimes) adventures he has afterwards. He learns the hard way that money can’t buy happiness but that it sure can lead to some very funny and bizarre experiences! At the beginning of the story, Tom is 26 but feels older because he’s bored with his life and feels rootless. He’s engaged to Erica Wonders: She’s smart and good looking and doesn’t treat him too badly, but Tom is bored with the relationship and doesn’t really love her anymore. He’s thinking about how he might be able to break off the engagement without all hell breaking loose. Though Tom is engaged to Erica, when he’s at work he has a hard time keeping his mind and his eyes off clerk and administrative assistant Lena Coffee. Sexy, flirty, and funny, Lena is Tom’s fantasy woman. Rumor has it that she has a boyfriend in a motorcycle gang, but she is just flirty enough and just nice enough to Tom for him to believe it’s not quite impossible that he and Lena could hook up. They end up having a secret affair.

However, Tom gets laid off from his job as an accountant at Allied Nuclear Corporation after a plant closing. He soon runs out of money and tries to find a new job but without much luck—eventually having to settle for shoveling manure for minimum wage at Meadowlark Farms. Erica is fed up with him, and it seems as if he’ll soon hit rock bottom. He’s down to his last $17, and even though he knows he shouldn’t, he buys a ticket for the Michigan Lottery at Joe’s Gas Mart. He barely makes the effort to check his ticket again the winning number when it’s announced on TV, but when he does, the seemingly impossible happens: His ticket matches the winning number!

Erica is absolutely thrilled, but Tom isn’t as happy as might be expected after such a turn of good fortune. With Tom tagging along, Erica goes on a giant spending spree. When he’s not shopping with Erica, everybody on planet Earth, it seems, tries to hit him up for money. The fortune has made Tom’s alienation from Erica worse, and he ends up breaking off the engagement. The end of his engagement makes him much sadder than he ever would have imagined, but he at least hopes it will be the beginning of a new life for him. Before he even has a chance to think about what he’ll do in the future, though, Lena calls him to tell him her boyfriend found out about their affair and is threatening to kill Tom, so he decides to leave town with hardly a moment’s notice. Now that he has so much money, he doesn’t necessarily think that’s such a bad thing, and he makes his way to Florida after an adventure at a hillbilly bar in Tennessee.

Tom ends up in Key West and thinks he’ll like it there, but he gets a shock when he goes to an ATM and is refused a withdrawal. Before long, he learns that Erica has sued him claiming the winning ticket really belonged to her and that a judge in Michigan has frozen his bank accounts! Broke again, Tom must again go out and look for a job. He hires in as a salesman at Florida Guano, where he meets secretary/receptionist Honey Sweetwater. All she seems to do at the office is work on her nails and looked bored. Tom soon finds, however, that she has pretty, mischievous eyes and a great sense of humor. Before long, the two of them are going out together and having a great time. Tom’s career at Florida Guano skids to a halt pretty quickly, but Tom and Honey have quite an adventure when they are invited to the Gothic mansion of Mr. Fabulous, the mysterious billionaire owner of Florida Guano.

Finally, the case of Wonders vs. Slotrak goes on trial, and Tom returns to Michigan. A legal battle to end all battles ensues, and Tom knows that the whole rest of his life. Will he end up rich and living a dream with Honey or will he end up right back where he was after he lost his job at A

• Language: English
• Publisher: Steven Arnett
• Release date: Dec 15, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311949530

Steven Arnett

Steven Arnett was born in Detroit, Michigan, in 1951 and enjoys writing fiction and poetry. He attended Michigan State University and the University of Maine. He currently lives in Johns Creek, Georgia, with his wife, Delphine, and daughter, Vivienne.

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Winners and Losers

By Steven Arnett

Copyright 2014 Steven Arnett

Cover Design by Laura Shinn Designs

Edition, License Notes

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Chapter 1

Tom Slotrak hadn't slept much. He had too much on his mind. A big company meeting was planned for that day, and wild rumors had been floating around that management was going to announce a major downsizing and possibly even the closing of their facility. All night Tom stared into the dark and kept thinking about what he'd do if he lost his job. A side of him welcomed the thought. He was sick of working at Allied Nuclear, and he'd wanted for a long time to do something else with his life. But the prospect of losing his job left him with a lot to worry about, too—like maybe not being able to find another job and not being able to pay his bills.

Now that the morning of the big meeting had arrived, however, Tom felt he hardly even cared what they announced. Perhaps he'd worn out all his worrying during the night. As he drank his coffee he felt relaxed as he scanned the Farewell Gazette and half listened to Good Morning, America. He clinked the spoon against the cup and breathed in the aroma. Another day. He wondered what else he might do to make a living as he turned to the Want Ads and a large ad caught his eye.

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LEARN AT HOME!

What profession in America today is crying for new members yet can't find enough people to fill the high $$ jobs? Mortician, that's what. Until now you could only learn this high status profession at major universities that charge high tuition. But now, through the auspices of the American Home University, you can enter this exciting and challenging field without leaving the comfort and convenience of your own home! We provide all the learning tools you'll need: Casket, mortician's dummy, practice blood, embalming fluid, mortician's knife, textbook and how-to video. Practice in your basement or your back yard. Call now because supplies are limited! Don't miss out! Major credit cards accepted.

That's what I'll do, Tom thought, laughing. I'll get out of the accounting business and become a mortician. Be the envy of all my friends.

Tom was 26 but felt older because he was bored with his life and felt rootless. Most of his life he'd felt like an orphan. His parents, Ray and Virginia Slotrak, had divorced when he was eight, and he hadn't seen his dad much since. His mom had remarried and her new husband, Carl Speller, didn't like Tom and hadn't much tried to hide it. That was especially true after they'd had a kid of their own, a girl named Jenny who was now 15 and who'd grown up feeling about the same way toward Tom as her dad did. Carl was a heavy drinker who moved from job to job and often went long stretches without working at all. For years his mom had worked in an auto parts plant. She drank almost as heavily as Carl did, and she always seemed out of it when Tom talked to her. Though they only lived a couple of hours drive away, in trailer park in Wyandotte, Michigan, Tom hadn't been back to visit in a couple of years. There wasn't any place to put him when he visited anyway, because they lived in a small trailer, and he always felt like he wasn't welcome.

Tom also had a brother, Ernie, who was four years older and reminded him a lot of his stepfather. He didn't work much, either, and when he called Tom, it was usually to see if he could borrow money. His alienation from them had become more pronounced since he'd gone to college, where he'd majored in accounting not because he liked it but because he'd read it was one of the highest paying fields and was the profession least likely to be affected by changes in the economy. In his family he was the only one with a college education. Now his family was more an embarrassment to him than anything, though sometimes he felt ashamed when he thought of them that way.

About the only thing Tom's parents had given him that was worth much were his looks. He was quite a good looking guy, and he looked hip, although he looked hipper than he was. He was slender but had a muscular build. His hair was dark, nearly black, but his skin was fair, and he had radiant blue eyes that had made a few women fall madly in love with him. His eyes sparkled when he smiled and to some women made him extraordinarily attractive. His attractiveness for many women was more pronounced because he hardly seemed aware of it himself. He really didn't think of himself as great looking, and whether he was or wasn't terribly important to him anyway—not nearly as much as it was to most guys his age. A moustache he had, and he wore a small earring in his right ear. His boss had launched more than a few sarcastic remarks Tom's way because of the earring, but it was an element of style he refused to change.

Before long Tom was at his desk at the Allied Nuclear Products Company, located in the Michigan city of Farewell, population 54,983. The company made components for nuclear power plants and nuclear weapons. As had become usual lately, Tom found it difficult to concentrate on his work. His mind wandered hopelessly. One moment he'd be fantasizing about one of the women at the office, the next trying to think about some way he could make a living without having to be an accountant any more.

From work his mind might wander to his fiancée, Erica Wonders. He'd wonder whether they'd ever really end up getting married, but before he knew it he was recalling some TV show he'd watched the night before, a song he liked, a memory, maybe even a poem he'd read years before. One thing after another came into his mind, and before he knew it an hour had gone by and he hadn't got a thing done.

The concentration problem was especially acute whenever Lena Coffee walked by and got worse yet when she talked to him. Could any woman possibly be sexier? Tom had pondered this question many times and come to the conclusion she was either the sexiest woman in the world (although he always smiled when he said that to himself) or at least the sexiest woman who worked for Allied Nuclear Products Incorporated (all divisions included). Now here she was walking into his office again, just when he was ready to start getting down to some serious analysis.

"Sorry to interrupt, Tom, but I just had to ask where you want this report filed," she said, holding out the report with a smile and a flair that would have been more suitable for a quiz show model.

A look in her eyes there always was and a certain character to her smile that made him think she was mocking him. He was never quite sure whether she was laughing at him or with him. But he thought of the contact he had with her as a game, and he enjoyed the game.

If I was Superman I could probably read the title from here, but since I'm not, you'll have to tell me, Tom said with a smile.

Well, I'm sorry. I thought you knew since we discussed it about an hour ago. It's called 'Financial Projections for Allied Nuclear Products in the Year 2000,' like she was reading a proclamation. I started reading it myself, and it was so fascinating I just couldn't put it down. I especially enjoyed the sex scenes.

Lena had rich olive skin, and softly curled hair that was such a dark shade of brown it looked nearly black. Her big lips looked as juicy as plums, and she had huge brown eyes. She had a big chest and a nearly perfect figure. To Tom it seemed she had the type of body that would make it easy for her to put on weight, but as far as he could tell, she was never even an ounce overweight.

File it under 'Strategic Planning - Long Term Future.' He paused briefly. But you'd better cut out the sex scenes. Mr. Hardy might not understand. I've got a feeling it's been a while for him, if you know what I mean.

Oh, all right. I guess we'll just have to leave it to our imagination, won't we? with a provocative smile.

I suppose we will.

She made no mention of the company meeting. It had almost become a taboo subject around the company. People had talked about nothing else when the rumors first started to leak out, but now if anyone brought it up, they were likely to be greeted by a dirty look and some remark like, Haven't we talked about that enough already?

Lena walked out, but for a long time afterward Tom thought about her. Sometimes he became fascinated wondering about what she really thought of him. Often she flirted with him, but she did that with a lot of the guys, so he thought it probably didn't mean diddly. A couple of guys at the company had got up the guts to ask her out, but she'd turned them down. The gossip around the company was she had a boyfriend in a motorcycle gang called the Stilettoes. That hardly made Tom enthusiastic about the idea of asking her out, but he enjoyed thinking about it. He'd laugh about how preposterous the idea was—but there was just enough possibility of it really happening to keep it from being completely absurd. He could think if he and Erica broke up, and if Lena broke up with her motorcycle gang boyfriend and if she really did like him as much as she sometimes let on and if she were lonely enough, it wasn't totally outrageous to think she would go out with him.

He was on just this type of daydream tangent when his boss, Mr. Hardy, walked into his office and rudely interrupted him.

Morning, Slotrak, Mr. Hardy said. How are you coming on the Buffalo report? referring to the cost analysis Tom had been assigned to do on Allied Nuclear's plant in Buffalo, New York.

Buffalena? Tom said, half in a daze.

Buffalo, you ninny. What in the hell do you think I'm talking about?

Buffalo, of course. Buffalo. It's coming along all right. Some of the numbers don't quite add up. I thought I'd call there today and see what the story is.

Well, get to it. We can't wait forever to make a decision. Every day we wait is more lost money.

I'll get it done as soon as I can. Sorry if I seem kind of out of it. I guess I've been thinking too much about the meeting today.

Slotrak, how many times do I have to tell you that nobody's going to lose in this thing? hitting his fist against his palm. Everyone'll either keep their job here, get transferred to another facility or get retrained for suitable employment at another company, as if he were reading straight from the company memo on the subject. It's a win-win situation. So stop sulking and get to work.

Tom smiled when Mr. Hardy left. He loved pissing him off, and he didn't care any more about what he thought. He never seemed to realize when Tom did it on purpose. Al Hardy was an old fashioned type of manager, and Tom couldn't relate to him at all. He was an ex-major in the Army, and he still had the straight posture and strict disciplinary style of his Army days.

Tom thought about how he really hadn't done much of anything on the report. It was the type of report he used to whip out in nothing flat when he'd first started with the company, but now he didn't seem to be getting anywhere. Why rush to get anything out, he thought, if he was probably going to lose his job anyway?

Another topic Tom often thought about was what he'd do if he if won the Michigan Lottery. He bought tickets for every Wednesday and Saturday drawing, and followed the pot closely as it rose and fell from the $2 million dollar minimum to the tens of millions it sometimes got up to. He didn't think he really had a chance of winning. He'd read in the paper that the odds of picking the right number were something like 14 million to one against. He had nothing but contempt for the people he'd see in party stores on the day before the drawing who'd buy fistfuls of tickets and talk like they really had a chance to win. No, he wasn't like those fools, he thought. But still, it was fun to think about what you'd do if you won, and wasn't that the real attraction of the game anyway, the fun of thinking and talking about what you'd do if you won?

Tom's fantasies about winning the Lottery would change in detail, but the main themes stayed consistent. He'd quit work the next day, and when he went in to tell Mr. Hardy, he'd gloat like hell and watch everybody turn green with envy. He wouldn't do what he'd heard a lot of other people say they'd do, go into to work and tell everyone what he really thought of them. No, he'd be magnanimous. He'd rather see everyone jealous than mad. He'd rather piss them off in a funny way.

Through the offices smiling and joking he'd walk and really rub it in. When he came to Lena, he'd call her aside and whisper an invitation to join him on the trip up to Lansing to pick up the check. She'd stand by his side and smile while he answered questions at the press conference afterwards, then join him for dinner in a private dining room at Lansing's best restaurant. They'd spend the night making passionate love in the Presidential Suite of an imaginary best hotel in the state's capital. They'd make love on the bed, the floor, and in the giant Jacuzzi, and in the morning they'd jet off to Jamaica to spend a month in the sun...

He was in the midst of a Lottery fantasy when he was roused to go to the company meeting by a knock on his office door.

C'mon, Tom, time to wake up, Bob Plane said, smiling. Plane was Tom's best friend at Allied Nuclear. You don't want to be late for the biggest meeting of your life.

Hang on. I'll walk down with you, Tom said.

The two hundred or so employees of Allied Nuclear-Farewell assembled in the company auditorium and waited for the top brass of upper management to arrive. All hands meetings always followed the same pattern. Everyone except the top managers filed in, and about five minutes after everyone was seated the managers would come in and sit down in a row on the stage and would be introduced by Wilma Cox. Ms. Cox was the executive assistant of Winston Radnick, who was the chief of the Farewell facility and an Allied vice president. In keeping with tradition Ms. Cox now stepped to the podium and greeted everyone with a plastic smile.

Good morning everyone, she said in a singsongy voice. I hope you're all feeling well today. Mr. Radnick has an important announcement to make, so without further ado, here's Mr. Radnick.

A fat, bald executive to the podium with a spring in his step.

Thank you, Mrs. Cox. He usually started meetings with a joke or a wisecrack, and when he didn't this time, Tom assumed he was going to announce bad news. Mr. Radnick cleared his throat and looked down at the papers he'd brought to the podium with him. Then he looked straight out at the audience. There comes a time in the life of a company, when, in order to survive and prosper in the future, it has to move in a different direction. For Allied Nuclear that time is now. We're going to be moving faster in the future, faster than we've ever moved before, and in order to move at a faster speed, we're going to have to lighten the ship.

Cut the B.S., Bob Plane whispered, leaning over toward Tom.

Unfortunately, on this new journey we're not going to be able to take everyone with us. As I said we're going to have to lighten the load. In the future Allied Nuclear is going to be lean and mean and it's going to adapt to change faster than a speeding bullet, gesturing with his hands.

Gimme a break, Bob said.

For some of the employees of Allied Nuclear this change is going to mean a career change. Unfortunately, the Farewell facility is one top management has chosen to close. A groan went through the crowd. Don't groan yet, Mr. Radnick said, holding his hand out in a stop gesture. I've got some good news to announce, too, a little bit later. Our mission here in Farewell is going to be taken over by Allied Nuclear's new state-of-the-art facility in Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia. He seemed to be having a hard time containing his enthusiasm.

That's his idea of good news? Bob said.

We thought about transferring the whole crew here to Mongolia, but we came to the conclusion that most of you wouldn't be satisfied with the local wage.

25 cents an hour.

Not to mention the fact you might get homesick and suffer extreme culture shock. But anyway, now for the good news. First of all, we're going to shut down in phases and we're not going to close completely for two years or more. So many of you will still have wages coming in for quite a while, and we'll be keeping a few people on even after that to help with the physical shutdown of the facility. Beyond that a portion of you will be offered jobs at another Allied Nuclear facility.

Yeah, him and Mrs. Cox.

We're expanding our global operations and we'll need good people to keep the ball rolling. For instance, we'll need quite a few people to help us open up our new plants in Mongolia, Paraguay, and Bhutan. The rest of you will be offered a generous separation package and all the assistance we can offer in finding a new job, either locally or around the world.

We can work at any McDonalds we choose.

I have every confidence you'll all land on your feet. Thanks for your many years of fine service to Allied Nuclear. You've been a great group to work with, and we couldn't have done it without you. And don't look so glum, shaking his finger at the audience. Some time during the next couple of weeks your boss will call you in to discuss your future with Allied Nuclear. Until then, and even after then, don't worry, be happy. Everything'll work out for the best. Good day.

Mr. Radnick picked up his papers and walked out of the auditorium followed by his executive staff. The minute he was out of sight people started booing and then everyone seemed to start talking at once.

Surprise, surprise were the words that greeted Tom when he opened the door to his apartment after work that day. His fiancée, Erica Wonders, kissed him quickly on the lips and held his hands.

Well, to what do I owe this surprise? Tom said.

I just decided it's time we sat down and did some serious planning for our wedding. We can't put it off forever. Before you know it, January 15th will be here.

I may have a hard time concentrating on it tonight.

Why? half angrily.

I found out today I'm probably going to lose my job. Remember that big meeting I told you about?

Yeah.

We had it today and they announced our facility is going to be closed. Allied Nuclear's downsizing big time, and moving a lot of production to the Far East.

But won't they just transfer you someplace else?

I doubt it. Most people are going to be terminated. Street city.

Oh, Tom, that's awful, throwing her arms around him. Just awful.

It's not the end of the world. I'm sure I'll find something else sooner or later. No need to worry, he thought. I'm going to learn mortuary science at home.

Yeah, but with the economy the way it is now—it might be a year or more—we'll need money for the wedding.

Radnick did say they have some positions open, but I doubt you'd want to live in Outer Mongolia, smiling a little, trying to lighten the situation.

But Erica went on as if she hadn't heard him.

If you don't have a job by the time of the wedding, that would be terrible. What'll everyone think? They'll think you're an unemployed—

Bum, Tom thought, trying to imagine what Erica was thinking. They'll think you must be pretty desperate to marry me.

I wouldn't worry so much right now if I were you. They may even offer me a job nearby—Allied's got an office in Indianapolis. And even if they let me go, I might end up finding a better job.

We may even have to think about postponing the wedding, although I'd hate to do that.

We may, but there's no reason to make a decision that rash already.

Tom had put off making plans for the wedding before because he wasn't sure he wanted to marry Erica any more. But he hadn't shared his doubts with her—or anyone else for that matter—and there were still times when he wasn't sure he didn't want to marry her. If he broke off the engagement, he figured, it would cause a terrible scene and all her friends would hate him, and his friends would all think he'd made a big mistake. And he knew it didn't make a lot of sense that he didn't want to marry her. She was smart, good looking, and didn't treat him too badly. She was a pretty good catch for a trailer kid. And he wasn't getting any younger, he often told himself. He really couldn't afford to be so picky. The only problem was he was bored with their relationship. Bored stiff. How could he expect a marriage between them to last if he was bored already? But if he got fired, maybe she'd break off the engagement and he wouldn't have to worry about doing it himself. That would make things so much easier.

"I'd better get back to dinner—I'm sure you can tell I've got some spaghetti started. We can talk about this later and maybe try to make some decisions about the wedding."

Sounds like a good plan. And by the way, the spaghetti smells great.

Thank you. I'm making it the way you like it.

As Tom changed from his suit to jeans and a T-shirt, he tried to remember when he first realized his feelings about Erica had started to change. He decided there hadn't been any one moment, no time when a light had suddenly gone off and he'd realized he might not want to marry her. It had been so subtle. He wondered if her feelings about him hadn't changed just as much. In his mind he pictured her. She had shimmering blonde hair and blue eyes, and all in all looked like a suburban princess. She'd grown up in Brookfield, a suburb of Milwaukee. She was a cheerleader and on the homecoming court, and in the high school yearbook, the list of her activities was extensive. Her father was a regional sales manager for Elkhart Insurance Company and her mother a loan officer at a savings and loan. They'd joined a country club and were social climbers, just like their daughter. High hopes they had for Erica and Tom supposed they didn't think he was good enough for her and didn't believe he was going anywhere in his profession. But they were polite and never let