Once upon a ghost

By Yele Francis

The Peter, Sap fell in love with changed. He became deranged and loved her to an early grave. She had to fight to rest in peace for a piece of her was still with the beast. It was a battle she had to win. She got Jimmy to join in.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Yele Francis
• Release date: Jan 29, 2013
• ISBN: 9780957516816

Yele Francis

I live in Essex England with my wife and kids and write adventure stories

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Once upon a ghost

Yele Francis

Copyright Page

First published in Great Britain in 2013 by Liger Books at Smashwords

Copyright © Yele Francis 2013

The moral rights of the author has been asserted

This is a work of fiction, names, characters and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events or locales is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved

Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the copyright owner of this book

ISBN 978-0-9575168-1-6

Prologue

People slip in and out of subconsciousness. It’s a place where the mind meets the soul. When things go right, the mind gets the spoils and the soul is given gratitude. When things go wrong, the body spoils and life becomes solely spirit.

A spirit can roam for eternity looking for bodies to fulfil its needs. It compensates them with what they ask for. It tricks them, tries them... sometimes lies to them. But most of the time people lie to themselves. They don’t always understand what they are asking for or what they want.

Segun wasn’t going to live poor. He was going to choose from the options offered.

None of them were appealing, each had repercussions but any would make him rich. He knew rich. He was best sticking with what he knew then dealing with the repercussions.

Chapter One

‘Get rid of it or I’ll come round and do it myself.’

‘We are keeping it darling.’

‘Let’s get a few things straight here. There is no ‘we’. My name is not darling. And if I come across you and find out it is still in there, I will punch it out then punch some sense into you while I’m at it.’

I’ve dropped the receiver on her. I don’t want to hear her cry. I don’t think you do either. That was Sap. Sap, is short for something longer and please don’t ask what. She is Indian you see, extremely pretty and very shy.

I met her at The Soho Lounge in, believe it or not - Soho, a couple of months ago. She danced me off my feet, drank more cocktails than I could afford then made me her catch of the night.

She insisted on me following her home in a cab. I was willing to strike it lucky so to hers by cab it was.

Once we got in the cab she was all over me like an octopus on heat. Abandoning the car was well worth it. I’ve never had so much fun.

‘Stop here please.’

Sap broke up our snogging session to speak to the cab driver. I do admit. I was on an unknown cloud at the time.

The cab driver stopped in a dark part of an isolated street. We got out the car and I paid him.

Her tentacles were all over me again, she took me through some bushes then over a wall. We ended up in Golders Green Crematorium. She wanted me to take her on the steps of the main door.

‘Hell fucking no, over my dead body.’

She resumed her octopus act and got me heated again. This took me beyond reasoning. So out of pity I took her. I gave it to her in six different ways and had her squealing for more. We were on round seven when the keeper turned up. She was miles away by the time I composed myself.

She didn’t even pretend to wait for me - the selfish bitch. She had taken six and half rounds of my best performance and instead of showing appreciation she scampered at the first sign of trouble.

I had never had it so good though - the sex that is. So I guess I could say it was a brilliant night. But as you are aware, the phone calls started. I had a pack of three on me, who would have guessed I would need more than three in one night.

Well by my calculations, we went three and a half rounds naked - skin on... I didn’t even apply the withdrawal method. I thought nothing of it then. She looked like a sensible girl. By sensible I mean… I don’t know what I mean but that’s beside the point.

She phoned one night to say she was three months gone. ‘Gone where.’ was my reply. I first thought she wanted money, quick solutions cost about a monkey. She would never have got five hundred quid off me. I’m not stupid. At the most I would have given her four but for that I’d negotiate a consolation round.

Unfortunately she, as you have figured out, wants to keep it. I don’t want a brat, especially one conceived in that way, in that location. So I have installed the fear of God and the wrath of me in her. I’m willing to go further, if I ever catch up with her…

Anyway I’m not going to write anything incriminating. So let’s just say she is going to regret ever meeting me.

I have a soft spot for anything Asian, in a skirt, from sixteen plus to just under thirty but the feeling isn’t mutual. Even with all the efforts I put in and believe me, I have pushed the boat out on a number of occasions. I have never had an Asian catch till her.

There was that brief encounter with naughty Niddy. I met her while flipping burgers at Burger King. This was in the early days before I became an entrepreneur.

Raj, my team leader, acclaimed mate and only link to all Asian delights, informed me that naughty Niddy would do anything for a box of chocolates. He had noticed the way I drooled every time she came within spitting distance of me.

I took his words as gospel and got on her case. I started off with a box of ‘After Darks’. I could have got something else but I didn’t really want to come across as being cheap. Several boxes of chocolates and a king’s slice of my meagre wages later, I cornered her in the ladies changing room.

‘What do you want Sean?’

As if she didn’t know, as if it wasn’t obvious, as if she hadn’t got more than enough in payment. Sean was my working name at the time.

Anyway, I closed in and tried to table my case - Romeo style.

‘Niddy, Niddy dear, you know what I want, please let me, let me…’

‘Look Sean, you’re wasting time bring it out and get prepared. Quickly, before I change my mind.’

Was her convincing reply, it wasn’t the way I had fantasised things. But as they say in the football world, ‘its goals that count not dribbles.’

I whipped out my man - he was battle ready - if you get my drift. Niddy stepped back. I thought she had never seen a triple X large before, until she burst out laughing.

‘Where’s the rest of it? My pinkie would do a better job.’

This was the first time I heard her ridiculous laughter - it was unrefined and annoying. My man went from attention to at ease in milliseconds. But she had seen him and I had invested a fair bit on her. So I decided to turn up the charm.

‘Please Niddy. Just take it, its gets bigger once it starts working.’

Those were the best words I could think of at the time. She pointed and laughed hysterically. I was just about to retreat and try another approach when she stopped laughing.

‘Alright Sean, because I like you and you have been through a lot, I’ll let you have a quickie. Get it up to a reasonable size…’

Now that’s what I wanted to hear. I furiously got to work.

‘Need some help?’

‘Ye…yes please.’

I knew that once she tasted him there will be no going back. She reached into her locker and brought out a tub of mayonnaise. I had never used it before but with a nick name like Naughty Niddy you would trust that she knew what she was doing.

‘Did you lock the door?’

She stepped round me, while I put the mayonnaise to work. I got him ready then present him to her. I was met by blinding flashes, next came laughter then screams.

I pushed my man back in his base then charged the door. My path was blocked by... everybody. I scanned the laughing faces, some of them weren’t on shift that day, yet they managed to turn up to witness my demise.

I pushed through the crowd, ran into the street and kept on running. Their laughter chased after me. I’ve never stepped foot in that restaurant since. I left behind clothes, a wallet, a job and that week’s pay.

***

Ding-Dong

That’s the door bell. Sap has wound me up for the week, so I’m not in. It is after nine anyway and all respectable people should be at home or minding their own.

‘I know you’re in there Mr. Brown. I have my own keys. So if you don’t open the door, I will.’

Rats. It’s the landlord Mr. Patel. I guess he wants his rent. Social services actually pay for the flat but there is no way I would cough up a hundred and twenty pounds a week for a dump like this. It is unfair on the council and unfair on me.

‘I’ll be there in a minute, just getting dressed.’

Mr Patel is a fragile old man who is due to drop dead sometime very soon. My withholding his money is in the interest of mankind, I’m helping accelerate the inevitable.

I put on my sombre look then opened the door.

‘Good evening sir, it’s such a pleasure to see you and…’

‘These are my sons Mr Brown. Their elder brother is parking the van.’

He’s got a van. He should have said so. I could have chucked a few haulage jobs his way.

‘It’s a pleasure to meet you all… gentlemen please come in.’

My fragile landlord is only five foot four - if that. I wonder how he managed to produce children over six feet who look like bouncers. I also wonder what three of them are doing round my flat at this time of the night.

‘Mr Brown, you have been living here for eight months and you have yet to pay me any rent. I am no longer interested in any of your stories so I have come to speak to you in a language that you would understand.’

I wonder how long it took a dim looking Mr Patel to pick up my language.

His eldest son comes in. He is the biggest and ugliest of them all. Had I known Mr Patel had such a large family I wouldn’t have rented the flat in the first place.

‘But, sir I paid the deposit.’

‘That was two week’s rent eight months ago.’

Something tells me I’m not going to talk myself out of this mess, this time.

I pull Mr Patel aside and promise him the rest of the world in two weeks time.

‘No, no, no, you pay me now or you come for a ride.’

He’s not falling for it. He wants me to come for a ride in the back of his meat van. I don’t know what makes him think I’m willing to socialise with him and his family. Even if he had a daughter or two, Sap had just about put me off Asian delights.

‘Mr Patel, sir, I can’t go out now… it’s too late.’

He clicks his fingers and his sons stand up. It’s time to rumble.

Mr. Patel looks stressed. I don’t want to put him through any more trouble, so I offer him a thirty-three inch Sony HD 3D television, with stand and a matching blu-ray player - all brand new and boxed. He accepts it on the condition that I have five months rent ready by next week.

I let them into my spare room, which doubles as a repository. They take nearly half my stock - the thieving gits. They want to take more but I pour vegetable oil over myself and threaten to set myself alight. One of them slaps me but I keep my cool. These boys don’t know whom they are messing with. They are lucky, today isn’t my fighting day.

***

The sound of the postman delivering mail wakes me. I rush to the door to see what the new day has brought. Bills, bills, letters, three new credit cards all in different names and a card…

I pop the bills down the shredder. The rejection letters and the threatening letters go next. I file the credit cards but the card baffles me. It is unusual. I place it under a table lamp to have a better look. The return address doesn’t ring any bells either. I open it.

It has a picture of a stalk carrying a baby. I don’t bother reading the card. I keep the return address get my cosh and head out. She is about to be introduced to my ugly side.

It is a nice detached house in Golders Green. She is obviously still living with her parents. A young boy opens the door, he’s about four.

‘Hi son, please call Sap for me, Sap...’

‘Mama, mama…’

He leaves me at the door and goes scurrying back inside. Mama... She definitely isn’t old enough to be a mama to that, I hope. His mother comes to the door, luckily she isn’t Sap.

‘Yes.’

She’s got a heavy Asian accent. I don’t like her, there was no way she was going to be a grandmother to any child of mine. In fact I feel like slapping her right now for giving birth to such a stupid… but pretty daughter.

‘Good morning ma, I would like to see Sap please.’

I tilt my head to cover my face with the brim of my baseball cap. Just in case she has any brain cells that might be able to recognise me in future.

She shuts the door on me - the ugly goat. This is an act of war and I’m up for it.

I press the bell again then bang on the door a couple of times but no one answers. I don’t have much to do this morning so I sit in the car outside the house for a couple of hours. Nothing happens and no Sap...

I don’t see them moving house in a hurry so I head to the South Bank, pick up two of my boys then go shopping to replenish my stock.

After shopping, I head to Brentwood to sort out a new flat. My landlord has taken too much liberty. Imagine him coming round my flat at, nine pm GMT, with four of his ugliest and a meat van, just because I owe him some back rent. Then having the cheek to clear half my stock, not to mention the beating I received.

Invading my privacy is the last straw though. I’m going to trash the flat before I leave.

***

‘Yo who dat?’

It is after business hours so I can be casual. The phone goes silent for a while then I hear a heartbeat. I’m not paying for the call so I not bothered.

‘That’s baby saying hello to dada. Do you want me to rub my belly on your behalf?’

It’s her - the cheeky slut.

‘Sap... Sap, listen. I will be round yours in a couple of days with some money. You know what to do with it. Now if you ever and I mean ever call me again. I’ll kill you.’

I dropped the receiver on her can reply. In a couple of year’s time she would be a lot wiser. She would thank me for making the right decision for both of us.

I get up to close the bedroom window.

Ring…

It’s the phone again. She is asking for it.

‘Didn’t I tell you not to…?’

‘Good evening, I am calling about the car…’

She is making me edgy. I almost lost a punter there.

This is about the flashy Audi I have outside. I brought it off Fat Freddie last month. Fat Freddie can swipe money off three different credit cards for the same vehicle and the cards don’t even have to be in the same name. Any way I needed to free up some cash so I’ve put the car up for sale. It would cost Mr Stupid four grand.

Nigel would most likely pick the car up from the punter’s premises sometime in the early hours of the morning.

I’m going to give Sap a grand for her troubles. Once she sorts herself out, we might meet up again. I could forgive her for putting me through this mess provided it doesn’t go too far.

‘…Yes, it is in mint condition. I’m just a bit strapped for cash. I’ll sell to the first person who sees it… See you later then.’

I’ll give Nigel a call and arrange for him to call me while I make the sell. People tend to make quick decisions when they