A Legacy to My Sons: A Father's Reflections on Aspirations, Values and Life

By Jimmy Teo

Jimmy Teo, a father, a grandfather, and a businessman, shares his reflections on his life experiences and life itself in simple, readable and captivating English. First written for his sons, this sublime nectar of lucid life observation and wisdom is gleaned from his decades of living through good and bad times. Readers young and old, especially fathers and sons, can now relish and share it. When he plays with his three grandchildren Eden, Evan and Jemimah (aged 10, nine and two respectively), Jimmy cannot help but realises that with proper guidance, lots of love and discipline, his grand kids will one day shine and become beacons and pillars for many. His two sons Joshua and Jonathan are financially independent and can be considered successful in their arena of specialty; most importantly, they remain humble, kind and strong. They too in their quiet ways are impacting society. The latest edition of the Legacy book series, A Legacy to My Sons: A Father’s Reflections on Aspirations, Values and Life, is a distillation of Jimmy’s best writings, past and new. He aspires the book to be a salient catalyst – a force for good – for future generations – instilling in them the right values, brave aspirations and contentment with the gifts of life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: We Green Solutions
• Release date: Nov 26, 2012
• ISBN: 9789810724047

Book preview

Time flies. It is already a good 15 years since the first Legacy book was published, in 1997. I am now a grandfather of three: Eden is ten, Evan is eight and Jemimah is two years old.

I am already 61 years old.

Eden and Evan asked me recently, "Grandpa, are you the writer of A Legacy to My Sons because your name is on the book? I nodded. They were both wide eyed and said simultaneously, Wow, so good." I am glad that they are so proud of me.

Jemimah, my youngest granddaughter, recently stayed with us for a week in Singapore over the Lunar New Year (her parents Jonathan and Ka Mun are both Permanent Residents in Sydney, Australia). She loves to smile. Her smiles are so sweet, beautiful, warming and sparkling; and her eyes twinkle. As a grandpa, I am simply delighted and grateful to God that I am given the honour to hold and hug her. She even laughs like I do, loud and cackling. Those hearing her would laugh as well. How wonderful.

I cannot help but remember a friend of mine who had cancer. He asked his doctor if he would live to see his only grandchild from his only child – his daughter who was pregnant at that time. The reply was negative. It was a very sad matter indeed. Therefore, I am always thankful to God for each new day, and as long as I am alive, I wish to touch many lives with my efforts, particularly through my writing.

On 14 June 1991, I was at the Istana Singapore as a guest of Dr. Wee Kim Wee, the then President of Singapore, on the occasion of my 41st birthday. My wife Beow Leng and my younger son Jonathan were with me. Joshua was in Hong Kong. Dr. Wee shared a lesson that kept me thinking for a long time, even until today – 20 years later. He was addressing Jonathan. He said that his good friend in Malaysia visited him at his office when he was the High Commissioner of Singapore in Malaysia – crying. He told Dr. Wee that he had been kicked out of his bungalow by his only son and his wife; the bungalow that he had given them as a gift. Dr. Wee told him not to worry but to stay at an old folks’ home and he personally paid for all his friend’s monthly expenses. At that moment, I wondered how a son could kick out his father who had given him everything, even his bungalow. He must be very evil or out of his mind. I hope that my writing can help guide and nurture young people to be filial children and take good care of their parents.

Joshua and his wife Crystal, as well as Jonathan and his wife Ka Mun, are doing fine by God’s grace. Both Crystal and Ka Mun left their jobs to look after their children full-time for the present. This is a wonderful demonstration of their love and care.

The Legacy books have tens of thousands of readers worldwide, particularly in the ASEAN region (Association of Southeast Asian Nations) and in various languages as well. Heartening blogs and reviews about them appear regularly on the Internet.

Political leaders are also keen readers. Some leaders in the third world countries use the Legacy books to study English.

At a Legacy book launch in Manila on 27 September 2010, former President Fidel Ramos graced the function. He surprised me by addressing the audience and said, "I am a great fan of Jimmy Teo, the writer of A Legacy to My Sons. May I have his permission to quote his books in my other books and writings?" What an honour to hear this from a distinguished dignitary!

My passion is to share in the nicest, softest and simplest manner – so that readers will be touched, and wish to read more, and more. Some people even memorise my words. One key government leader surprised me by repeating verbatim all the chapters of my first book. He said that he used my book to meditate 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the evening.

Readers from national libraries of other countries contact me. I have made many good friends over the years. I have even clinched some businesses in the region because of the trust in me due to my books. Some people came to my home to take personal photographs with me. One even engaged a professional photographer to take pictures with me after I spoke at a school.

I regularly give my autographed books to new business friends. In this way, I have friends even from many branches of the government. Some of their children are my keen fans as well, and stay in contact with me.

Some schools use my books in their classroom lessons. Libraries are stocking them for their members. Many Singapore schools carry the Legacy books in their libraries. So does the National Library and its branches. I am surprised to see my books in universities in Malaysia and Thailand.

This is not an easy world. I have witnessed the demise of several good friends and associates, some younger than me. Some friends are in deep depression. In business, I have witnessed injustice and dirty political games. Our young people will face the same dilemmas. They all need guidance and inspiration to continue on. I hope they have the opportunity to read my writings as they are the culmination of wisdom gained from my experience of both good and bad.

Words have the beautiful ability to clean, cajole, inspire and even reprimand. Words are everlasting and can be read over and over again. They can be memorised. They have life. Words convey thoughts that can turn coal into diamonds, dreams into reality, sadness to happiness or the other way around. That means words can do both good and bad.

I want to use words to do good.

This is the prime purpose of this book.

You are very fortunate. This book, A Legacy to My Sons: A Father’s Reflections on Aspirations, Values and Life, is a distillation of my five Legacy Books in the A Legacy to My Sons series and three books in the A Legacy to My Friends series. It also includes new entries of my latest reflections on certain subjects. Indeed, what you are holding are the gems of the Legacy series.

This lovely masterpiece is born out of hard work and lots of passion. The cover design alone went through more than 30 changes by my publisher Tan ChinKar, a meticulous person. The distinguishing book cover represents the gift of life treasures, to be unwrapped by readers young and old, and especially by fathers and sons. Although ChinKar is not the author, he is much more eager to have the words penned in this book to reach as many people as possible. May his desire be fulfilled soon. I record herewith my grateful thanks to him.

I love all the chapters in my books. Hence, it is not easy to choose my favourite chapters and have them all in one book.

This book is specially arranged so that you and your family will benefit from its contents. Share it. It will also be available in e-book format for iPad, Kindle and other tablets for easy transmission and viewing in due time.

Initially, when I wanted to publish my first Legacy book, I was rejected by many publishers. They said that the content was good but I would have problems selling the book.

I am pleased to say that the Legacy series has surmounted the odds.

I have so many of you to thank. You know in your heart who you are. There is no need to mention names except for one whom I must not forget.

He is the late Michael Cheng, National University Hospital’s former Librarian Director. When I visited him at the National University Hospital in 1999 where he was undergoing treatment for liver cancer, his guests that day were the then Deputy Prime Minister Dr. Tony Tan and his wife (Dr. Tony Tan is today the President of the Republic of Singapore). Dr. Tan had been his University mate. We sat together, chatting and in a warm atmosphere. Dr. Tan had to leave for France the next day so he bid his Goodbye. What touched me was when Michael told him, I hope to see you again when you are back; not here but at my home. Michael knew that he may not last that long but he still harboured the hope that he could be better after treatment. When my turn came to say Goodbye, he held my hand tightly, and looked at me intently and said, "Jimmy, you must continue writing the Legacy books. Remember, you must not stop. The world needs your book."

This gentle and kind man became so strong in his words. I promised him that I would.

Michael Cheng was the person behind the success of the Legacy book; he edited it with the help of his wife Bernice, who was then Managing Editor of a publishing firm. He was very kind to retain most of my words. Even when he wanted to change some words, he would gently ask me if I concur.

Thank you, Michael. You are fondly remembered by many through this book.

Jimmy Teo

January 2012

PART I

First and foremost, the fundamentals of a

purposeful and well-lived life is one predominated

by an unequivocal set of values and beliefs.

Aspiration, resilience, wisdom and contentment.

These are time-tested attributes that will empower

our young ones with the conviction to believe that

they can make tomorrows better for mankind.

Our stay on earth is limited to about 80 years. It works out to 29,218 days only. That means every passing day registers a day nearer to our graves. We are like tourists. Yet, there is so much to learn and enjoy. In the midst of joy there is also sadness. Therefore, we need to learn a few secrets to fully enjoy our earthly stay.

As a young boy, I used to look at the stars and wonder. There are so many of them. Their faraway twinkling fascinated me. Now that I am almost five decades old, the same wonder still thrills me. Today we know that those few thousand visible stars are just a handful of the estimated two to three hundred billion stars in our Milky Way galaxy. And our galaxy is just one of at least 100 billion galaxies.

I am being conservative; new data from the Hubble telescope suggests there could be as many as 500 billion galaxies out there, each with maybe 300 billion stars of its own. Our Maker is really terrific. He allows us to see some of them from the earth and to study a few.

I am further amazed when I realise that if we take the smallest molecule and magnify it, it is a miniature universe! It is indeed beyond our understanding, the ingenuity behind all these creations. We just need to go deeper and drink in the joy of learning.

No computer can match our human brain. There is such a thing as Mind Power. There is such a thing as Faith. In all instances, you need to have strong beliefs and confidence. Albert Einstein, the famous scientist, said that the best brain in the world utilised only 10 percent of its capacity. That means that our brain is under-utilised. The secret is to know how to use our brain to the best of its capacity with the least stress.

Over the years, I have found out that some intellectuals fail. Most of them did not dare to take risks in business and therefore remained under the employ of others until retirement or death. I am reminded of the story of the hare and the tortoise. The hare thought that it had won the race as it had sprinted so far ahead, and so it slept for a while. The tortoise toiled on slowly but relentlessly. The tortoise won the race! Your strength must be buttressed by persistence. You must never give up. You must not be complacent and take good things for granted. You must be prepared for most emergencies.

We are all made to be achievers. The insurance to lasting achievement is humility. Pride always brings disgrace in due course. Humility is the lubricant that ensures that your machinery runs with the least friction and with the least wear and tear. The more humility you have, the longer will your machinery last.

Like our Creator, attempt great and marvellous things. Make your thoughts happy and beautiful. Do good and think good. Be cheerful and bright. Just as ants are attracted to sugar, people will then be attracted to you. You can be a source of inspiration and light.

Look at the stars and know that there is a Maker

Whose wondrous creations

Are beyond our comprehension.

And He gave us the same creative ability

To overcome odds.

Finding the solution to any problem

Demanding that we all must be achievers.

1.42 pm/ Saturday/ 6.5.95/ Office: Loyang | Revised 6.43pm/ Wednesday/ 28.6.95/Office | Revised 10.09am/ Saturday/ 16.11.96/ Office: Sindo | Revised 3.50pm/ Monday/ 12.12.11/ Changi City Point

A few hours ago, I had an interesting conversation with a taxi driver. We were talking about the difficult times