Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920
Ebook138 pages59 minutes

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920

Rating: 0 out of 5 stars

()

Read preview
LanguageEnglish
Release dateNov 26, 2013
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920

Read more from Various Various

Related to Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920

Related ebooks

Related articles

Reviews for Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920

Rating: 0 out of 5 stars
0 ratings

0 ratings0 reviews

What did you think?

Tap to rate

Review must be at least 10 words

    Book preview

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920 - Various Various

    The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159,

    December 29, 1920, by Various

    This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

    almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or

    re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

    with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org

    Title: Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 159, December 29, 1920

    Author: Various

    Editor: Owen Seaman

    Release Date: January 11, 2007 [EBook #20334]

    Language: English

    *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH ***

    Produced by Lesley Halamek, Jonathan Ingram and the Online

    Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net

    PUNCH,

    OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

    Vol. 159.


    29th December, 1920.


    CHARIVARIA.

    No newspapers were published on Saturday, Sunday or Monday. We did not begrudge them their holiday, but we do think The Daily Mail might have issued occasional bulletins respecting the weather at Thanet, as we consider three days is too long to keep their readers in suspense.


    The most popular indoor game this winter seems to be Battledore-and-Juttlecock.


    A woman informed a London magistrate last Tuesday that her husband thrashed her at Easter, Whitsuntide and on August Bank Holiday. Our thoughts were constantly with her during the recent Yuletide festivities.


    Readers should not be alarmed if a curious rustling noise is heard next Saturday morning. It will be simply the sound of new leaves being turned over.


    In view of the possible increase of their salaries it is not the intention of Members of Parliament to solicit Christmas-boxes. Householders, therefore, should be on their guard against men passing themselves off as M.P.s.


    Our attention is drawn to the fact that the latest photograph of Mr.

    Lloyd George

    shows him to be smoking a cigar with the band on. We can only say that

    Cromwell

    wouldn't have done it.


    Our magistrates appear to be made of poor stuff these days. A man named

    Snail

    was last week summoned before the Feltham magistrates for exceeding the speed limit, yet no official joke was made. Incidentally, why is it that Mr. Justice

    Darling

    never gets a real chance like this?


    A New York policeman has been arrested in the act of removing a safe from a large drapery store. It is said that upon being seen by another policeman he offered to run and fetch a burglar.


    Mme.

    Delysia

    has been bitten by a dog in New York. The owner's defence, that the animal had never tasted famous dancer before, is not likely to be accepted.


    Like a soothing balm just before the old year dies comes the intimation from Mr.

    Lovat Fraser

    that there is a bright side to things.


    With reference to the opening of the pantomime season it is reported that a couple of new jokes have been found nesting in a Glasgow theatre.


    Psychologists are inclined to attribute the recent night stampede of sheep in the Midlands, when thousands of them jumped their hurdles, to the influence of a large number of people concentrating on a well-known remedy for sleeplessness.


    It is stated that rabies does not exist in Ireland. Our opinion is that it wouldn't be noticed if it did.


    Very few English Christmas customs, we hear, are prevalent out in Russia. We have always felt that the custom of clients giving Christmas-boxes to their executioners will never become very popular.


    It is rumoured that the repeated assassinations of General

    Villa

    have made it necessary for him to resign his position as Permanent Chief Insurgent to the State of Mexico.


    The Morning Post has remarked that nowadays the Eton boy is often reduced to travelling third-class. It is hoped to persuade Sir

    Eric Geddes

    to disguise himself as an Eton boy during the holidays to see how it feels.


    It is now admitted that the plum-pudding which was badly mauled by a small boy in the Hoxton district on Christmas Day began it by inviting his assailant to come on.


    D'Annunzio

    is reported to be coming to a more reasonable frame of mind. Apparently he is disposed to allow Italy a certain measure of independence.


    People step out into the road and never look to right or left, says a London coroner. This makes things far too easy for motorists.


    Dr.

    A. Graham Bell

    recently told a Derby audience how he invented the telephone. We note that he still refuses to say why.


    We are informed that, on and after the 1st of January, Mr.

    Churchill

    cannot undertake to refute the opinions of any writer who has not been officially recognised as a best seller.


    A scientist has succeeded in putting a pea to sleep with electro-magnetism. The clumsy old method of drowning it in a plate of soup should now be a thing of the past.


    General

    Townshend

    says that with seventy thousand men he could have conquered half Asia. But then he might have lost Mr.

    Horatio Bottomley

    .


    What we want now is something to make the world safe for those who made the world safe for democracy.


    Enjoying the preview?
    Page 1 of 1