I'm Happy for You (Sort Of… Not Really): Finding Contentment in a Culture of Comparison

Written by Kay Wyma

Narrated by Tracy Brunjes

Is comparison living hijacking your life?

Do you find yourself measuring your value against your friend's house, body, marriage, resume, paycheck, organic garden, or Pinterest-worthy holiday decor, and coming up lacking? Do your college roommate's Instagram snapshots bear little resemblance to the scene at your house this morning?

Excessive comparison and competition sap our energy and steal our joy. Our friends become our audience and judges, and our kids become part of our brand. Add social media's constant invitation to post and peruse, and it's no wonder that we're left exhausted, discontent, and lonely. Thankfully, there is another way.

With refreshing candor and humor, Kay Wills Wyma shares her experiences with comparison living and offers listeners the simple remedies that helped her and her family reboot their perspective and discover freedom, authenticity, and joy.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tantor Media, Inc
• Release date: May 5, 2015
• ISBN: 9781494579692

Reviews for I'm Happy for You (Sort Of… Not Really)

[shetreadssoftly · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I'm Happy for You by Kay Wills Wyma is highly recommended. If we refuse to allow comparison to control our thoughts and emotions, we can be more content and full of joy.

The complete title of Kay Wills Wyma book, I'm Happy for You (Sort Of...Not Really): Finding Contentment in a Culture of Comparison, really explains the whole premise of the book. Wyma points out that most of us suffer from "Obsessive Comparison Disorder." When we are constantly concern about measuring ourselves in comparison to others it can take the joy away from things we like and all of that perceived competition can sap our energy and steal our contentment.

Comparison to others is really all about self-absorption and self-centered thinking. All of that focus on comparison can create dissatisfaction, even though many of the goals other people have were never our goals to begin with. We can help break free of Obsessive Comparison Disorder by being able to say "I'm happy for you," and truly meaning it. We need to try to celebrate what others are sharing without comparing our lives to theirs.

Wyma wisely points out that, "Even now I wonder how many of life’s gifts I have labeled hardship and thus missed enjoying their benefits. How many times have my eyes been closed in self-pity or focused on what I thought I wanted. Good things exist in the midst of bad circumstances, if we’re willing to look for them."

She shares a Ctrl/Alt/Delete strategy when dealing with Obsessive Comparison Disorder:
Ctrl: Control the Thought Process by Pausing to Recognize the Problem. Curing comparison starts by being aware and by identifying the signs that it has infiltrated our thinking.
Alt: Consider an Alternative Perspective.
Delete: Eliminate Comparison - or at Least Tone It Down

I loved the quote from Anne Lamott that Wyma shared: "I can still get my jeans on, for one reason: I wear forgiving pants. The world is too hard as it is, without letting your pants have an opinion on how you are doing.

Disclosure: My Kindle edition was courtesy of Crown Publishing for review purposes.

[ecataldi-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This is essential reading for everyone, especially in this day in age. We allow our emotions to be dictated by social media, how many likes we get, what our friends are doing, how pretty we look in our pictures. It's a never ending cycle of self loathing and jealousy and it needs to stop. This book tackles comparison, why we compare our lives with others and how that affects the way we live ours. As quoted in the book, "This is one of the main reasons we struggle with insecurity: we're comparing our behind-the-scenes with everybody else's' highlight reel."We're all guilty of it. One of my best friend's got engaged recently and my first thought it, "Well, I'm dying alone." Just because all my friends are married and working on kids doesn't mean that I have to be too. I should be happy for them (and mean it) and happy for myself as well! Being single can be awesome, I never have to ask anyone's permission if it will fit in the schedule, never have to find a babysitter, and will always be able to admire the male form. Who knows, maybe Mr. Right is closer than I thought. It's all about looking at the picture a different way. This self help book breaks down why we feel the need to compare every aspect of our lives to others and talks about developing strategies to help you feel better about yourself and better for your friends. It's a great read full of inspiring quotations, real life testimonials, and great advice. A must read for everyone, especially the social media addicts.I received this book for free from Flyby Promotions in return for my honest, unbiased review.