3. Sex anxiety: when you don't feel like having sex

FromThe Anxious Love Coach

Start listening View podcast show

3. Sex anxiety: when you don't feel like having sex

FromThe Anxious Love Coach

ratings:

Length:

33 minutes

Released:

Jun 23, 2020

Format:

Podcast episode

Description

In this episode, I uncover the psychology of resistance to sex with our partners, along with the techniques I use to release this resistance and open up to intimacy in the bedroom.

Released:

Jun 23, 2020

Format:

Podcast episode

Titles in the series (88)

Here we talk relationship anxiety, ROCD, and upgrading love partnerships-- how to go from DOUBTING your relationship to LOVING it and gushing about your man.

Skip carousel

1. How I Broke Free From Relationship Anxiety: After years of having doubts in my (now) 8-year partnership, I managed to stumble into a breakthrough where I was finally able to confidently and joyfully commit to my awesome partner. In this episode, I share my organic story on how I went from... by The Anxious Love Coach
36 min listen
16. The Paradox of Cuteness in Relationships: Have you ever been disgusted by your partner being cute with you? This episode might not be for everyone -- but if you and your partner adore cute things and sometimes you start wishing things got more "intellectual" or "adult-like", I've put a lot of... by The Anxious Love Coach
31 min listen
12: The Best Gift to Give Your Relationship Anxiety this Season: There is one thing that so many people with relationship anxiety struggle to give themselves... and in this episode, I cover exactly that while hopping live in my exclusive Facebook group, The Anxious Love Coach Collective -- link to join in the show... by The Anxious Love Coach
43 min listen
3. Sex anxiety: when you don't feel like having sex: In this episode, I uncover the psychology of resistance to sex with our partners, along with the techniques I use to release this resistance and open up to intimacy in the bedroom. by The Anxious Love Coach
33 min listen
2. Live on Instagram: What to do when you're attracted to someone else: We're talking what to do if your relationship anxiety causes you to be attracted to someone else! "If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you truly loved the first, you wouldn't have fallen in love with the second." I... by The Anxious Love Coach
39 min listen
7. What an actual ROCD "Breakthrough" looks like!: In this episode, I interview one of my incredible coaching and meditation clients, Shannon, who came to me struggling with Relationship OCD/Relationship Anxiety. She shares what her awakening process looked like without the fluff, and the new wisdom... by The Anxious Love Coach
24 min listen
13. "Settling": The word that destroys great relationships: Every worry you're "settling" if you stay with your partner? You're not alone: this thought process isn't your fault and it has good reason for being there-- but there are a ton of ways it isn't helpful when looking at relationships, especially for... by The Anxious Love Coach
39 min listen
23. The worst place to find relationship advice: This podcast episode was recorded on Instagram live after I was inspired by a conversation with a client, where she and I discussed the worst places to find relationship advice and why -- and where to find good relationship advice instead. ... by The Anxious Love Coach
25 min listen
4. The "Trust Your Gut" Debunk with Chelsea Joy Horton: When you're experiencing relationship anxiety, hearing "trust your gut" or "listen to your intuition" can be one of the most triggering things you can hear. Is your intuition telling you to leave, or is it ROCD? Tune in with Chelsea Joy Horton, OCD... by The Anxious Love Coach
63 min listen
6. Ever worry you're a narcissist?: One of my biggest fears in the past was that I'd be perceived as a narcissist. I resorted to frequent people-pleasing so people could think I was "good" in order to try and prevent this. Problem is, it led me to being more resentful and self-centered... by The Anxious Love Coach
43 min listen
11: Why Relationship Anxiety Can Spike During the Holidays: I tried to break up multiple times with both my long-term partners of whom I experienced ROCD with -- and a hard majority of those "pull-aways" happened around the holidays. Back then the timing seemed so random, but I see today something much... by The Anxious Love Coach
41 min listen
17. Are you setting a boundary or are you manipulating? with Mollie Birney: This is a juicy one and very humbling. In this episode, I chat with my friend Mollie Birney, a clinical life coach, about the difference between autonomy-respecting boundaries and manipulative boundaries, how to know if you're showing up with an... by The Anxious Love Coach
45 min listen
5. When people say "Maybe you should leave": When I was in the thick of Relationship Anxiety, comments like: "maybe you should leave" "maybe he's just not the right person for you" "you're young, maybe you just need to explore" were enough to send me into a gut-wrenching spiral of anxiety. In... by The Anxious Love Coach
30 min listen
29. How to better respect and feel more attraction towards your partner: While I think it's so useful to normalize dips in attraction, that's only half the puzzle in satisfying long-term relationships! True empowerment comes from knowing how to shift sluggish, disempowering dynamics into self-aware, humble, inspiring ones.... by The Anxious Love Coach
37 min listen
8. So you fell out of love: In a culture of cancellation that tells you to leave when you're not feeling it, the perspective to stay and do a deep dive into yourself instead of dropping out of the relationship, may be a controversial one. In this episode we normalize falling out... by The Anxious Love Coach
52 min listen
22. Self-conscious of how others view your partner? with Chelsea Horton: Have you formed an alliance with society/family/friends or with your partner? In this episode, Chelsea Horton, Relationship Anxiety Specialist and dance therapist, joins me on IG live as we explain what's really happening when we feel embarrassed by... by The Anxious Love Coach
49 min listen
10. The Truth about Independence with Mollie Birney, MA by The Anxious Love Coach
50 min listen
26. Fighting Fairly in Your Relationship with Mollie Birney, M.A.: Today, I chat with my dear friend Mollie Birney, a clinical life coach, about how to utilize conflict in a relationship that is expansive and actually enhancing and -- dare I say -- enjoyable? Conflict is intended to be challenging but it doesn't have... by The Anxious Love Coach
64 min listen
19. Wisdom on relationships from the aunt we've always needed: I'm honored to bring my aunt, Diane Sigala, onto Anxious Love Coach today. In the throes of relationship anxiety, my aunt was a regular phone call I made to help me understand relationships (and men!) better. This is a delicious and sweet episode... by The Anxious Love Coach
49 min listen
27. I don’t always know what I’m doing in relationships either, guys: This is a raw and real voice text I recorded on my walk. I discuss the challenges/uncertainties of being a relationship coach. This episode includes my thoughts on this work, why uncertainty and doubt are absolute critical pieces to being open-minded,... by The Anxious Love Coach
14 min listen
28. How Confessing Your Thoughts to your Partner is Making your ROCD worse: If you’ve ever found yourself confessing your intrusive thoughts to your partner in order to feel better, you’re not alone! However, you might be doing more harm to yourself and to your relationship than good. In this episode, I offer a... by The Anxious Love Coach
33 min listen
9. How to Stop Being Controlling With Your Partner: You’re not attracted to a partner you control — and controlling behavior is a common way to avoid feeling “out of control.” However, it’s a huge contributor to feelings of dissatisfaction and disgust in relationship and ROCD. In this... by The Anxious Love Coach
39 min listen
37. The week I thought I might be a lesbian: I just returned from a women's sensuality retreat in Costa Rica and re-discovered my love for my own femininity, women, and sisterhood. There are elements of this podcast that I think would be enormously helpful for women in relationships with men who... by The Anxious Love Coach
53 min listen
15. Why Your Partner Can’t Meet All (or Even Most) of Your Needs: This one comes deep from personal, local, and recent experience from my heart. When we are feeling starved in multiple aspects of our lives, it's common to look to our partners to fill in the gaps. In this episode, I make a point to help you identify... by The Anxious Love Coach
41 min listen
35. Can your menstrual cycle affect your relationship anxiety?: Are you more anxious about your relationship right before your period? In this episode, we will address the menstrual cycle from a more holistic lens, and how to leverage each phase you're in to maximize the potential for you to connect with yourself... by The Anxious Love Coach
86 min listen
21. Working through Triggers with our new Co-coach Sheridan Ruth: I’m so thrilled to introduce Sheridan Ruth to our community at Anxious Love Coach. She is a fantastic yoga therapist, meditation teacher, and embodiment coach with her own experience with relationship anxiety. We’ve brought her on as a co-coach to... by The Anxious Love Coach
52 min listen
18. Maintaining a sexual connection when your partner is depressed with Luci Lampe: If your partner is going through a dark phase and isn't able to be your rock, it's challenging to maintain an erotic connection or spark. If you're in the thick of this, there's hope-- and you're going to want to listen to this raw deep dive with... by The Anxious Love Coach
61 min listen
14: When Your Partner has a Low Vibe and is Bringing You Down: When your partner is operating at what we might call a "low vibe," it's only natural our attraction will wane for the time being. We might take the lack of attraction we feel in that circumstance at face value and panic about whether we're in the... by The Anxious Love Coach
38 min listen
34. Ever wonder if you're making a mistake by staying in your relationship?: Ah... my favorite dark rabbit hole... "Am I making a mistake?" If you question every decision you make, period, your relationship will fall under that line of scrutiny too. In this episode, I address how this line of thinking (not just in your... by The Anxious Love Coach
36 min listen
25. Awakening Through Your Womb Space with Tantric Arts Teacher Shayna Hiller: I'm overjoyed and humbled to bring on someone hugely impactful in my life. Shayna Hiller is a yoga and tantric arts teacher living in Venice Beach, California. Shayna has also been a business coach for me in the past and is one of the reasons I... by The Anxious Love Coach
55 min listen

More Episodes from The Anxious Love Coach

Skip carousel

89: How illusion is ruining your sex life and attraction (and what to do about it): My most "meta" episode yet... If your suffering about your relationship is caused by comparisons to illusions (rose-colored memories of your ex, Disney, Tiktok), then can we flip the dynamic on its head and re-invigorate the relationship by... by The Anxious Love Coach
27 min listen
88: Overcoming sex anxiety with Shayna Hiller: If you've ever experienced dread around making love due to the "ick," pain, anxiety, shame, or being too tired, this episode is for you! I'm excited to introduce a dear friend and mentor of mine, who is also a trained Tao Tantric Priestess,... by The Anxious Love Coach
82 min listen
87: Reclaiming softness in life and partnership with Jessica Fawn: An underrated skill in the path of overcoming relationship anxiety: reclaiming softness, befriending anxiety, and learning to trust and follow glimmers of joy. This episode was so tender and beautiful it made me weepy. I am very grateful to present to... by The Anxious Love Coach
45 min listen
86: How to Build a Career in Anxiety Work with Chelsea Joy Horton: If you've experienced profound healing and liberation from relationship anxiety, you may have felt the desire to pass this transformation on to others. If that's you, you're going to want to give this a listen and hear what it's like to be on the... by The Anxious Love Coach
54 min listen
85: Thoughts on ERP (Exposure & Response Prevention): Two things are true: 1) I am unqualified to speak on ERP and OCD and 2) I am sharing my thoughts about ERP for those that still want to hear them even though I am unqualified. What is ERP (Exposure & Response Prevention)? How helpful is it for... by The Anxious Love Coach
26 min listen
84: Sex and communication tips from Aunt Diane: My beloved Aunt Diane sent me some tips and I don't gatekeep. Listen up! Join me for Both Feet In - Abridged starting January 19th: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/both-feet-in-abridged If you need immediate support, write me a Wisio. I'll... by The Anxious Love Coach
15 min listen
83: How to stop comparing your relationship: Hey! I'm testing out a new mic, so bear with me. ? If you tend to compare your partner to other people in real life or online, this episode is for you! I used to struggle with this a lot, but these tools have become second nature to me now and both... by The Anxious Love Coach
20 min listen
82: Ever wish you were in a relationship with someone else?: So many clients of mine feel ashamed when they experience a crush while in partnership. It’s a highly charged, delicate topic! You’re not alone, and you’re not a bad partner. If you’ve experienced this, I’d like to give you some tools to... by The Anxious Love Coach
28 min listen
81: May I tell you about my miscarriage?: Trigger warning: this episode is a story. It is chock-full of triggers, pain, grief, mentions of death, blood, and gore. If you've experienced miscarriage and there are some sore spots and tenderness, I might wait until you've gotten enough support to... by The Anxious Love Coach
68 min listen
80: 5 things I'd tell my younger self before entering partnership with my now-husband: I entered my relationship "knowing" Preston was the one... but then, years in, I stopped knowing anymore! In this episode, I speak to the younger version of myself that was struggling horribly with relationship anxiety. Some of you are in this place... by The Anxious Love Coach
42 min listen
79: To be free from anxiety, get comfortable with disappointment. Here's why and how.: In this episode, I'm sharing a vulnerable story and a recent personal loss... and what it has taught me. I want to share how loss, pain, grief, and disappointment are portals to the divine... if you will let them be so. Patreon next call... by The Anxious Love Coach
62 min listen
78: Want to break up with your partner right before the holidays?: Are you feeling an intense urge to break up right before Thanksgiving or winter break? You're not alone. It's actually very common! In this episode, I outline some common reasons behind holiday break-up urges and what you can do instead. ... by The Anxious Love Coach
32 min listen
77: For the partners of people with relationship anxiety: If you: are with someone struggling with relationship anxiety/ROCD and want to do your part... were broken up with because of someone's RA... are struggling with RA, but want to see what your partner's "work" is... want to look at your RA from... by The Anxious Love Coach
47 min listen
76: 6 counter-cultural relationship beliefs we hold - with Chelsea Horton: In this episode, my friend and other relationship anxiety practitioner, Chelsea Horton over at Healing Embodied, and I share our counter-cultural relationship beliefs that have served us well and brought us deep peace in our long-term partnerships.... by The Anxious Love Coach
76 min listen
75: 10 ways to control your partner: I really should have titled this, "10 ways Natalie is controlling." Ha! I hope you enjoy this episode. If you want to practice trusting your partner more, I give you 10 examples of ways to do this based on mistakes I've made. Listen to this episode,... by The Anxious Love Coach
43 min listen
74: Overcoming relationship anxiety through sisterhood/brotherhood: In this episode, I share how the lack of sisterhood/brotherhood/community can contribute to relationship anxiety and dissatisfaction, and how to cultivate it. Links: Ask me a question: Evoke his Devotion 1 on 1 program: Overhaul, my 1 on 1... by The Anxious Love Coach
32 min listen
73: A quick way to get off the fence: In this episode, I share a simple question that will help you ground yourself in reality, and actually move forward with life, if you're stuck on the fence over your relationship. Links: Ask me a question: Evoke his Devotion 1 on 1 program: ... by The Anxious Love Coach
23 min listen
72: Yes. Lower your expectations: In this episode, I talk about the curvature of expectations held in marriage/partnership over the centuries, and how in this day and age, it is beneficial, in some ways, to lower your expectations. I also address the "alpha male" and "high value man"... by The Anxious Love Coach
47 min listen
71: What makes a partner "good enough" to settle down with?: What makes a partner "good enough" to settle down with? It's common knowledge (especially if you listen to my podcast often) that "perfect" isn't a realistic standard to search for when choosing a long-term partner. While your choice of partner is one... by The Anxious Love Coach
64 min listen
70: How social media is turning you against your partner: In this episode, I share how polarizing, black-and-white content on social media is pinning people against each other. I will also admit that I fell prey to this and started a fight with my husband before recording this episode. I also share what I... by The Anxious Love Coach
49 min listen
69: Overcoming relationship anxiety through IFS Therapy with Alex Bishop: It's my pleasure to bring on Alex Bishop, a registered counsellor and IFS (Internal Family Systems) therapist, onto the podcast today. Alex has struggled with Relationship OCD/Relationship Anxiety, and disorganized attachment, and can speak deeply on... by The Anxious Love Coach
76 min listen
68: How to know if you’re in a toxic relationship: I often add the disclaimer to relationship anxiety content to disregard my insight if you’re in a toxic or abusive relationship. But that begs the question for many: how does one know that the relationship they are in is toxic or abusive? In this... by The Anxious Love Coach
48 min listen
66: Overcoming numbness toward your partner: Whether you never got to be single because you met your partner young, you’ve been in a string of back-to-back relationships, or you’re longing for the freedom that supposedly comes with the single life, this episode is for you. Yes, you can... by The Anxious Love Coach
51 min listen
65: Can you be “single” while in partnership?: Whether you never got to be single because you met your partner young, you’ve been in a string of back-to-back relationships, or you’re longing for the freedom that supposedly comes with the single life, this episode is for you. Yes, you can... by The Anxious Love Coach
23 min listen
64: Are you nurturing your “inner relationship”? with Luci Lampe: It's easy to focus on our partners and neglect our own “inner relationship.” In this episode, my friend Luci Lampe and I discuss the balance between our masculine and feminine sides - yin and yang - for a better partnership. We also talk about... by The Anxious Love Coach
63 min listen
63: Why reassurance seeking is not free (and what to do instead): In this episode, I share the costs of reassurance seeking, the act of trying to find certainty about your relationship. If you tend to constantly be searching for the perfect piece of advice (even from me!), you’re addicted to the illusion of... by The Anxious Love Coach
39 min listen
62: Why a lack of commitment is not freedom: In this episode, I unpack one of the biggest hidden myths I see in society: that commitment = lack of freedom. If you struggle with commitment, I will share with you some reasons why you might be struggling, as well as some shifts that have helped me... by The Anxious Love Coach
48 min listen
61: How do you know if you’re in the “right” relationship? With coach Sarah Yudkin: In this episode, I chat with a dear friend of mine and coach, Sarah Yudkin, who has been inhabiting the relationship anxiety space with me for years! In this episode, we address the following: What is “the right” relationship and is that even the... by The Anxious Love Coach
55 min listen
60: "I am so controlling of my partner but I don't know how to stop. Help!": If you experience relationship anxiety, you might be familiar with the urge to try to change your partner so that you can feel better about your decision to be with them, and stop doubting the relationship so much! You’re not alone. It can be so... by The Anxious Love Coach
61 min listen

Discover this podcast and so much more

3. Sex anxiety: when you don't feel like having sex

3. Sex anxiety: when you don't feel like having sex

Description

Titles in the series (88)

More Episodes from The Anxious Love Coach