Click for full show notes, exercises, and word-for-word scripts from this episodeLet's face it: we want our kids to be happy. And we know that, in order to be happy, they need financial freedom and they need to be doing work that challenges them and allows them to make a positive contribution to the world.So we emphasize the importance of doing well in school and sports and other activities. We're training our kids to succeed in life.But, as bestselling author Brandilyn Tebo explains on this week's podcast episode, this creates a serious problem: our teens get the message that they have to win in order to be worthy of our complete love. And, perhaps even worse, they start to feel like they need to win in order to be worthy of self love.Brandilyn knows what she's talking about. As she explains in her bestselling book, The Achievement Trap, she was once caught up in the trap herself. She was a fashion model, straight-A student, president of a club at her college, and a volunteer at the nearby animal shelter.From the outside, she seemed to have the perfect life.But after she developed an eating disorder that led to a breakdown, she started to question everything about the way she was living her life. When she finally found the answers, they didn't come from where she expected.Today, she leads retreats around the country and works with individuals and business as a life and branding coach.On this episode Brandilyn reveals the solution for parents looking to help their teens steer clear of the achievement trap. She says it's critical to teach teens how to start seeing failure and loss as opportunities to practice unconditional self love.How, exactly, do you teach this skill to teens?That's the subject of this week's episode.