“How Do You Deal With Bitterness And Resentment?” – Listener Question

“Is ‘Trying’ Disrespectful?” – When A Spouse Wants Out: "Gem" wrote me after a recent episode of my podcast. In that episode, a therapist said, after one single session (where divorce had not been mentioned) that the client needed to prepare for divorce. In Gem's case, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

24 min listen

Struggling with Separation: Is separation the best scenario for saving a marriage? No. Many times, a separation ends up being a "dress rehearsal for divorce." Living separately creates patterns of separation. Connection becomes more difficult. But is it all for naught? by The Save The Marriage Podcast

28 min listen

All The Wrong Reasons: Should You Stay Together?: We continue with listeners’ questions on the Save The Marriage Podcast. And in this episode, I pull together a central question about “Should we stay together because of this Insert Bad Reason Here?" Several people told me they were still married, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

20 min listen

Pushing Through…: What do you do when you feel like giving up, like nothing you do is making a difference? Or when your spouse says you are trying to hard, or acting strange? Or when you have dragged your spouse to retreats, therapy, workshops… and at every turn, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

31 min listen

The Problem with Changing… and Proving It!: Things hit a bad spot in your marriage… and your spouse isn’t sure about staying or leaving the marriage. Sure, it may have been a relationship issue, but you may be feeling blamed. It’s pretty common to go looking for the “bad guy” in any situation.... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

28 min listen

Depression And Your Marriage Crisis: Lately on the podcast, I have been answering listener questions. And quite a few have come in about how depression affects a marriage. Does depression cause a crisis? Or do people get depressed because of the crisis? Or... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

28 min listen

Work on Me, Work on WE?: What do you do if your spouse decides they need to work on themselves... and then they may (or may not) be willing to work on the marriage? What do you do if your spouse just refuses to work on your marriage? That is the question of the week, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

17 min listen

“How Do You Deal With Bitterness And Resentment?” – Listener Question: .Resentment eats away at any relationship. It can destroy a marriage. Bitterness takes over and every good memory or thought is re-remembered and "bitter-ized" The foundational connection in the relationship is sapped of energy. by The Save The Marriage Podcast

21 min listen

When Your Spouse Can’t See A Way Forward – Limiting Beliefs: We all have limiting beliefs. You... me... and your spouse! I always work to change my limiting beliefs. You are probably doing the same. But you can't just change your spouse's limiting beliefs! What is a limiting belief? by The Save The Marriage Podcast

23 min listen

Moving Forward… One Way or The Other…: "I need some encouragement," the note ended. The writer is a listener of my podcast and admitted the hard work that has gone into trying to save his marriage. At the same time, another listener asked about whether this effort -- the work to save her ... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

23 min listen

How Do You Know If Things Are Improving?: Phil asked, "How do you know you are making progress?" And perhaps fearing that the signs point the other way, he also asked, "how long is long enough to be trying before it is unhealthy for me." Those are two great, if somewhat polarized, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

23 min listen

“Why Can’t I Get Started?”: Audrey wrote me to ask, “I just can’t get started on my marriage. What’s wrong with me?" She wrote in as a listener of my podcast. (And if you have a question for the podcast, send it to me here: Podcast@SaveTheMarriage.com) by The Save The Marriage Podcast

21 min listen

Co-Dependence, Independence, and Interdependence – Listener’s Question: Here we are, Independence Day in the United States, marking the moment when the young colonies rejected ties to the British Crown. So many times, I have people "declare their independence" from their marriage... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

18 min listen

Disrespect and Boundaries: "A" has been trying to set boundaries with her husband. Trying to get the treatment she deserves. Trying to get the relationship to a healthy spot. But then, her spouse throws a little shade her way... rolling eyes, using a demeaning tone. by The Save The Marriage Podcast

22 min listen

“How Long?” Trust, Trauma, and Towels: I'm still answering your questions! If you have a question you want me to cover on the podcast, just SEND ME AN EMAIL HERE. Today, we cover "time." Or more specifically, "How Long?" The questions come from 2 listeners, "B" and "J." by The Save The Marriage Podcast

27 min listen

“Why Should I Even Try?” – When Discouragement Hits… Hard: Several people have asked me the same thing: "What if I am not even sure I want to save my marriage? I am so frustrated and discouraged, I feel like quitting... not even trying." It is a great question! (By the way, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

28 min listen

Heavy Holiday? Marriage Crisis and the Season: When life is hard, Holidays can feel heavy. When there is a marriage crisis, it can be tough to muster the energy to even move forward — especially when all the commercials and movies push the “merry and bright” of a mythic holiday. And here we are, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

16 min listen

Why It All Came Tumbling Down: “It suddenly fell apart,” Jenny told me. As far as she could tell, everything had been great until… one day… her husband said, “our marriage is over.” Before that, Jenny said, there had been no trouble. Why did it all come tumbling down? by The Save The Marriage Podcast

20 min listen

Proving Your Perception (is dangerous): I can’t count how many times a couple has come to me for “help with our communication skills.” Funny thing is, they communicate just fine. Then why are they stuck in conflict? Why are they disconnected? Why does it seem like they aren’t on the same... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

22 min listen

Turning Conflict Into Intimacy: Relationships of any depth and any magnitude are going to hit up against conflict. It is just the nature of being close to someone. You are going to have differences that emerge. It is not a question of if, but when those differences appear. by The Save The Marriage Podcast

43 min listen

The Affair… and The Aftermath: Question: does an affair cause marital problems or do marital problems cause affairs? Answer: YES. Longer answer: for the majority of affairs, weak points in the marriage create a vulnerability to infidelity. by The Save The Marriage Podcast

27 min listen

Your Questions About Infidelity, Part 1: Someone cheated. What now? Can a marriage survive infidelity, either physical or emotional? Can a relationship recover after an affair? Over the past while, I have been answering listener questions (you can submit by emailing here). And this week, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

27 min listen

Staying Stuck in the Negative – What DO you DO?: [Have a question about saving your marriage? Ask it by emailing me HERE.] Several listeners asked why a spouse only remembers the negative, or only dwells on the negative. Why don't they remember the good times or see the good things? by The Save The Marriage Podcast

23 min listen

Did Your Apology Fail?: You apologized to your spouse… maybe on your own, or maybe because I suggested it. And... ... Nothing. Nada. Zero. Zilch. No change, no difference. Does that mean that your efforts are over? That your attempts to save your marriage are a failu... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

22 min listen

How to Deepen Your Connection: The #1 reason people sought me out for couples counseling: “We are just not connected.” The #1 reason why marriages end up failing: “We are just too disconnected." What happened? That connection you had at the beginning of your marriage… where did... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

43 min listen

Where Did The Love Go?: I get that question very frequently: “What happened? Where did the love go?" Maybe you feel it, maybe you hear it. The end result is the same: one or both people just not feeling it… not feeling love. Maybe “I love you, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

21 min listen

“I’m Just Not Happy”… The Excuse to Leave?: What do you do when a spouse declares, “I’m not happy,” as the reason the marriage has to end? Or how about, “You’re not happy,” or “I can’t make you happy”? I have heard this reason given over and over. It is a common (but false) belief that a marr... by The Save The Marriage Podcast

20 min listen

Your Questions About Infidelity, part 2: In the last episode, I answered questions about infidelity and marriage. Well, I started answering questions. Since I started asking for your questions, I have received quite a few about affairs and infidelity. So, by The Save The Marriage Podcast

37 min listen

Staying the Course in a Crisis (or 2): The phrase, “Stay the Course,” comes from the commitment in battle to continue moving toward your goal, regardless of obstacles or difficulties. So first, let’s let go of the battle analogy. You aren’t in battle. by The Save The Marriage Podcast

23 min listen

What Now? – Saving your marriage in the midst of a pandemic: First, you were caught in the swirling whirlwind of a marriage crisis. Now, to add to that, a pandemic is taking over. Whatever fears you had about your marriage are now layered with your concerns about your health (and the health of loved ones). by The Save The Marriage Podcast

16 min listen

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“How Do You Deal With Bitterness And Resentment?” – Listener Question

“How Do You Deal With Bitterness And Resentment?” – Listener Question

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